This article is an excerpt from the Shortform book guide to "The Way of Integrity" by Martha Beck. Shortform has the world's best summaries and analyses of books you should be reading.
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What is your true self? Is there something to intuition? How do you trust yourself?
Martha Beck argues that, at your deepest level of self, you know what will make you happy and what kind of life you want to lead. You also know how you feel and what is true about your own life. This deepest level of self is your personal nature.
Continue reading to learn more about Beck’s theory of identity.
What Is Your True Self?
What is your true self? Beck contends that your personal nature constitutes a sort of bedrock for your psychology and personality. You may experience your personal nature in the form of intuitions or deep personal yearnings or as a sense that something is “off” in your life when you stray too far from your nature.
| Is There a “True Self?” Many psychologists agree with Beck’s assertion that there is a core self that contains your true desires and goals in life—a “true self,” in other words. However, some psychologists have rejected this idea and consider it an ideal rather than a reality. Psychologists who reject the “true self” argue that what people think of as their “true selves” is in fact just who they want to be or feel they ought to be. It is an aspiration rather than a reality. They also cite research finding that people feel “authenticity” when they are accepted by others in a group setting, even if they are behaving contrary to how they would behave outside of that setting. This suggests that “authenticity” may have more to do with external validation than internal validation, paradoxically turning the concept of a “true self” on its head. Psychologists who support the existence of a “true self” highlight the painful experiences of hiding parts of ourselves for the sake of conformity, and the anguish caused by living out of alignment with core personal values. They assert that these experiences are painful because they contradict parts of ourselves that are either more important or more deeply held than other desires and motivations, suggesting the existence of either a “true self,” or something like it. Some psychologists also argue that a stable and consistent sense of an authentic self is an essential building block of healthy self-esteem. To believe that you have value, first you must believe there’s a you. |
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Here's what you'll find in our full The Way of Integrity summary:
- How to know if you're living in alignment with your true self
- How messages from our culture tell us to chase things we don't really want
- The four stages of realigning your life to find happiness
