This article is an excerpt from the Shortform summary of "The Game" by Neil Strauss. Shortform has the world's best summaries of books you should be reading.
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What is NLP in PUA? How does NLP work for PUAs, and are there signs to watch for to recognize when a pickup artist is using NLP ?
NLP in PUA is a technique where the PUA uses different words and movements to create subconscious responses. When Neil Strauss met Ross Jeffries, Jeffries demonstrated NLP in PUA.
Learn more about NLP, PUA techniques, and use outside the PUA community.
What is NLP? How PUAs Use It
Specifically, Jeffries used a technique called neuro-linguistic programming (NLP). NLP for PUAs was based on the concept that words, movements, and suggestions could tap into a person’s subconscious to affect her thoughts, emotions, and actions.
Using NLP, a PUA would steer his conversations with a woman toward the subjects of attraction and arousal. Then, he would use questions and suggestions to connect those feelings of attraction with a physical sensation, in order to make the woman subconsciously associate the PUA with those feelings and sensations.
Jeffries Demonstrates NLP as a PUA
Neil met Jeffries for lunch, along with two PUAs named Grimble and Twotimer, who were students of Jeffries.
Jeffries—a not-particularly-attractive man in his 40s—demonstrated NLP pick up artistry on their 20-something waitress:
1) He asked the waitress what she felt physically when she was really attracted to someone. His question was designed to make her associate attraction with him. The waitress responded that she got butterflies in her stomach.
2) He suggested that, as she got more attracted to someone, her butterflies probably rose higher and made her blush. As he said this, Jeffries put his hand near his stomach, palm up, and raised it toward his chest.
This was anchoring in NLP PUA technique: The motion created an association between the gesture and the feeling of attraction that caused butterflies and blushing. Throughout the rest of the conversation, every time Jeffries raised his hand from his stomach to his chest, the waitress blushed. The waitress seemed entranced, and she gave Jeffries her number.
3) As the conversation wrapped up, Jeffries rubbed his hand on a sugar packet. He told the waitress he was transferring all the good feelings she was having into that packet, so that she could keep them with her all day. This was called “condiment anchoring” another NLP PUA technique.
Jeffries Tries to Recruit Neil
Throughout their meeting, Jeffries had been prying Neil for information about Mystery’s workshop and criticizing Mystery’s strategies. As the only two PUAs offering any form of training, there was an obvious competition between Mystery and Jeffries.
By the end of the afternoon, Jeffries invited Neil to come to his upcoming seminar for free. However, his offer seemed to come with a condition: Jeffries told Neil that he would be Neil’s guru—not Mystery.
Neil was not willing to pledge his loyalty, so he simply thanked him for the invite.
NLP in PUA is one of the most common PUA techniques. NLP also exists in legitimate psychological settings, and was adopted by PUAs.
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Here's what you'll find in our full The Game summary :
- The secrets of the Pickup Artist community in seducing women
- How key Pickup Artist leaders fought with each other and split the group apart
- What author Neil Strauss took away about women from his years of training