Ross Jeffries: The Original PUA Offers Advice

This article is an excerpt from the Shortform summary of "The Game" by Neil Strauss. Shortform has the world's best summaries of books you should be reading.

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Who is Ross Jeffries? What was his role in The Game, and how did he know Neil Strauss?

Ross Jeffries was one of the PUA gurus Neil Strauss met when he dove into the seduction community. Ross Jeffries in The Game was one of the original PUAs, and he developed a technique based on NLP, or neurolinguistic programming.

Ross Jeffries: PUA Guru and Seduction Hypnotist

Neil had lessons from one guru under his belt. Now that he had a foundation, he wanted to integrate techniques from other gurus, as well. Coincidentally, the next guru that Neil met was Mystery’s business competition, Ross Jeffries. 

Ross Jeffries in The Game was considered the godfather of the seduction community ever since he introduced Speed Seduction in 1988. Tens of thousands of disciples followed Jeffries’s method of seduction, which blended psychology and hypnosis. 

Specifically, Jeffries used a technique called neuro-linguistic programming (NLP). NLP was based on the concept that words, movements, and suggestions could tap into a person’s subconscious to affect her thoughts, emotions, and actions. 

Using NLP, a PUA would steer his conversations with a woman toward the subjects of attraction and arousal. Then, he would use questions and suggestions to connect those feelings of attraction with a physical sensation, in order to make the woman subconsciously associate the PUA with those feelings and sensations. 

Jeffries Demonstrates NLP

Neil met Ross Jeffries in The Game for lunch, along with two PUAs named Grimble and Twotimer, who were students of Jeffries. 

Ross Jeffries the PUA—a not-particularly-attractive man in his 40s—demonstrated NLP on their 20-something waitress:

1) He asked the waitress what she felt physically when she was really attracted to someone. His question was designed to make her associate attraction with him. The waitress responded that she got butterflies in her stomach. 

2) He suggested that, as she got more attracted to someone, her butterflies probably rose higher and made her blush. As he said this, Jeffries put his hand near his stomach, palm up, and raised it toward his chest. 

This was anchoring: The motion created an association between the gesture and the feeling of attraction that caused butterflies and blushing. Throughout the rest of the conversation, every time Jeffries raised his hand from his stomach to his chest, the waitress blushed. The waitress seemed entranced, and she gave Jeffries her number. 

3) As the conversation wrapped up, Jeffries rubbed his hand on a sugar packet. He told the waitress he was transferring all the good feelings she was having into that packet, so that she could keep them with her all day. This was called “condiment anchoring.” 

Jeffries Tries to Recruit Neil

Throughout their meeting, Ross Jeffries the PUA had been prying Neil for information about Mystery’s workshop and criticizing Mystery’s strategies. As the only two PUAs offering any form of training, there was an obvious competition between Mystery and Jeffries. 

By the end of the afternoon, Jeffries invited Neil to come to his upcoming seminar for free. However, his offer seemed to come with a condition: Jeffries told Neil that he would be Neil’s guru—not Mystery. 

Neil was not willing to pledge his loyalty, so he simply thanked him for the invite. 

Ross Jeffries the PUA was one of the original PUA gurus, and as such, was protective of the community. Ross Jeffries welcomed Neil Strauss into the PUA community, and demonstrated his NLP technique.

Ross Jeffries: The Original PUA Offers Advice

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Here's what you'll find in our full The Game summary:

  • The secrets of the Pickup Artist community in seducing women
  • How key Pickup Artist leaders fought with each other and split the group apart
  • What author Neil Strauss took away about women from his years of training

Carrie Cabral

Carrie has been reading and writing for as long as she can remember, and has always been open to reading anything put in front of her. She wrote her first short story at the age of six, about a lost dog who meets animal friends on his journey home. Surprisingly, it was never picked up by any major publishers, but did spark her passion for books. Carrie worked in book publishing for several years before getting an MFA in Creative Writing. She especially loves literary fiction, historical fiction, and social, cultural, and historical nonfiction that gets into the weeds of daily life.

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