The World's Best Book Summaries
Is it common to fantasize about violent sex? What do violent sexual fantasies tell us about ourselves? Sexual fantasies are a natural, healthy part of adult sexuality. And it’s not actually uncommon to fantasize about sexual aggression. Yet, we feel like there’s something wrong with us for coming up with (and enjoying) these scenarios. Here is what aggressive sexual fantasies tell us about ourselves, according to couples therapist Esther Perel.
Are egalitarianism and sexual desire mutually exclusive? How do they contradict each other? How can we foster sexual equality when the act of sex itself is a power play? According to Esther Perel, the author of Mating in Captivity, egalitarianism and sexual desire are inherently at odds with each other. Egalitarianism is all about fairness and respect, while sexual desire is driven by aggression and power play. However, this doesn’t mean that egalitarianism and desire have to be a balancing act. Here’s what couples therapist Esther Perel has to say about sexual equality.
What do sexual fantasies tell us about ourselves? What do they symbolize? And why do we keep them to ourselves? Our sexual imagination is a gateway to our sexuality—erotic fantasies reveal a lot about our inner sexual worlds. According to psychotherapist Esther Perel, sexual fantasies are unlike regular fantasies in the sense that they are symbolic, not literal. Further, sexual fantasies are often in contradiction with our self-image which is why people tend to keep them to themselves. Keep reading learn about the psychology behind sexual fantasy and what your sexual thoughts reveal about you.
Why is the “us versus them” mindset so destructive? How has intersectionality contributed to the problem? In what ways have these problems contributed to call-out culture? Jonathan Haidt and Greg Lukianoff, co-authors of The Coddling of the American Mind, discuss the three “Great Untruths” in modern society. The first of those untruths is the untruth of “us versus them.” In their book, they discuss where this mindset originated from and what the implications are. Keep reading to learn what Haidt and Lukianoff have to say about the dangers of the “us versus them” mindset.
What are some negative influences in life? How do you protect yourself from bad influences? Negative opinions, thoughts, or attitudes that come from outside or within will have a bad influence on you. You can protect yourself from negative influences by closing your mind against anyone or anything that discourages you and focusing your mind on your goals. Read more about the major negative influences in life and how to protect yourself from them.
Why is sex such a contentious topic? How do the mixed views on sex influence sexual desire? American culture has mixed feelings about sex, and when this culture pervades our relationships, it can impair our desire. American culture tends to look at sex from two extreme points of view, hedonism and Puritanism—sometimes even at the same time. In this article, we’ll consider the clash between the two and its implications for the way we approach our own sex lives.
What exactly is intimacy? What’s your preferred way of expressing intimacy—verbal or nonverbal? In modern times, our concept of intimacy has become more precise—we consider it to be achieved mainly through verbal communication. But talking isn’t the only intimacy language, intimacy can also be fostered through nonverbal communication. Keep reading to learn about the two languages of intimacy, how and why they sometimes clash, and what can be done about it.
What is Esther Perel’s Mating in Captivity about? What is the key message of the book? Mating in Captivity looks at what makes up our individual sense of desire and our desire for our partners. According to author Esther Perel, although desire and love may have some fundamental contradictions, there are ways to balance the clashes, and ways to manage extra-relationship stresses. Below is a brief overview of Mating in Captivity by Esther Perel.
How do you react to feedback? What factors determine whether you are going to act on the feedback given or dismiss it as unimportant? According to communication experts Douglas Stone and Sheila Heen, we react to feedback, not because of the content of the feedback itself, but because of who gave it to us and our relationship with them. If we receive feedback from those we like (relationship trigger 1) and who treat us well (relationship trigger 2), we are more likely to heed their insights. Otherwise, we look for ways to disqualify the feedback. In this article, we’ll discuss
When does sexuality start to develop? How does childhood influence our sexual relationships in adulthood? Human sexuality begins to develop very early in childhood, way earlier than we start expressing interest in sex. Our childhood experiences influence our adult relationships in three primary ways: how we’ve learned to balance dependence and independence, how we view sexuality, and how gender norms affect our sexuality. In this article, we’ll discuss the role of early childhood experiences in sexuality development.