100 Best Sexuality Books of All Time (Updated for 2026)

1

Sex at Dawn: The Prehistoric Origins of Modern Sexuality

Christopher Ryan, Cacilda Jethá

5.0

“Sex at Dawn challenges conventional wisdom about sex in a big way. By examining the prehistoric origins of human sexual behavior the authors are able to expose the fallacies and weaknesses of standard theories proposed by most experts. This is a provocative, entertaining, and pioneering book. I learned a lot from it and recommend it highly.” — Andrew Weil, M.D.

“Sex at Dawn irrefutably shows that

Recommended by Noah Kagan, Aubrey Marcus, and Esther Perel.

Noah Kagan

Founder/Sumo

A few months ago, I was drinking a Noah’s Mill whiskey (cute) with my good buddy Brian Balfour and talking about life... During the conversation, we got on the topic of books that changed our lives. I want to share them with you. I judge a book's success if a year later I'm still using at least 1 thing from the book. [source]

Esther Perel

Esther Perel recommended this book as an answer to "What are some resources for couples who want to explore having a more “monogamish” relationship?" [source]

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2

Come as You Are: The Surprising New Science that Will Transform Your Sex Life

Emily Nagoski

4.9

An essential exploration of why and how women’s sexuality works—based on groundbreaking research and brain science—that will radically transform your sex life into one filled with confidence and joy.

Researchers have spent the last decade trying to develop a “pink pill” for women to function like Viagra does for men. So where is it? Well, for reasons this book makes crystal clear, that pill will ne

Recommended by Susan Quilliam.

Susan Quilliam

It’s one of the best books ever written, in my view, for guiding women in particular through the minefield of their sexuality in today’s world. [source]

3

Mating in Captivity: Reconciling the Erotic and the Domestic

Esther Perel

4.8

Preview Summary

Esther Perel takes on tough questions, grappling with the obstacles and anxieties that arise when our quest for secure love conflicts with our pursuit of passion. She invites us to explore the paradoxical union of domesticity and sexual desire, and explains what it takes to bring lust home.

In her 20 years of clinical experience, Perel has treated hundreds of couples whose home lives are empty of p

Recommended by Dan Engle.

Dan Engle

Such a good book about just deconstructing the whole idea of success in relationships. [source]

4

The Ethical Slut: A Guide to Infinite Sexual Possibilities

Janet W. Hardy

4.7

The Ethical Slut is credited with raising awareness of the possibility of consensual non-monogamy as a lifestyle, and providing practical guidance on how such long-term relationships work and are put into practice.

The Ethical Slut discusses how to live an active life with multiple concurrent sexual relationships in a fair and honest way. Discussion topics include how to deal with the practical dif

5

She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman

Ian Kerner

4.6

Preview Summary

Ian Kerner offers a radical new philosophy for pleasuring women in She Comes First—an essential guidebook to oral sex from the author of Be Honest—You’re Not That Into Him Either. The New York Times praises Kerner’s “cool sense of humor and an obsessive desire to inform,” as he “encourages men through an act that many find mystifying.” An indispensable aid to a healthier, more fulfilling sex life

6

Lolita

Vladimir Nabokov

4.5

When it was published in 1955, Lolita immediately became a cause célèbre because of the freedom and sophistication with which it handled the unusual erotic predilections of its protagonist. But Vladimir Nabokov's wise, ironic, elegant masterpiece owes its stature as one of the twentieth century's novels of record not to the controversy its material aroused but to its author's use of that material

Recommended by Ev Williams, Bryan Callen, Ella Berthoud, and 3 others.

Bryan Callen

So here are my three must read books. I've been reading a lot of great books like: Outsmart Your Instincts, The Culture Code, and Antonio Damasio’s The Strange Order, and sometimes when you read a lot of nonfiction it’s very enriching, sometimes you need a novel. I really believe you should take a minute and read something beautiful. Listen, listen to Lolita by Nabokov. But also listen to Blood Meridian by Cormac McCarthy and listen to Richard Poe narrate that. Those are two of the greatest feats of the english language that I can think of. Then there’s Fortress of Solitude, an amazing book, Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close, these are great novels. Cold Mountain is a beautiful novel, Snow Falling On Cedars, I mean they’ve been around for a while. But goddamnit, get those under your belt. Those are the novels I think you should read. You know Love In The Time Of Cholera it just makes you ache. Kind of like a Hemingway thing, where Hemingway “ahh!”, it’s the same thing, you know. So I don’t know, I’m a fan of all those books. Those are my 3 slash 20 books. [source]

Ella Berthoud

Even though it’s wrong, you sympathise with him because he can’t help himself and writes about it in such a passionate and empathetic way. [source]

Richard Cohen

It’s more imbued with references to the sun and using the sun as symbol or metaphor – almost a kind of character in the novel – than any other work in literature. [source]

7

Bonk: The Curious Coupling of Science and Sex

Mary Roach

4.5

In Bonk, the best-selling author of Stiff turns her outrageous curiosity and insight on the most alluring scientific subject of all: sex. Can a person think herself to orgasm? Why doesn't Viagra help women-or, for that matter, pandas? Can a dead man get an erection? Is vaginal orgasm a myth? Mary Roach shows us how and why sexual arousal and orgasm-two of the most complex, delightful, and amazing

8

The History of Sexuality, Volume 1: An Introduction

Michel Foucault

4.5

Michel Foucault offers an iconoclastic exploration of why we feel compelled to continually analyze and discuss sex, and of the social and mental mechanisms of power that cause us to direct the questions of what we are to what our sexuality is.

9

Fun Home: A Family Tragicomic

Alison Bechdel

4.5

Preview Summary

In this graphic memoir, Alison Bechdel charts her fraught relationship with her late father.

Distant and exacting, Bruce Bechdel was an English teacher and director of the town funeral home, which Alison and her family referred to as the Fun Home. It was not until college that Alison, who had recently come out as a lesbian, discovered that her father was also gay. A few weeks after this revelation,

Recommended by Hillary Chute.

Hillary Chute

Alison has a strip that’s been running for a long time called Dykes to Watch Out For, but this is an autobiographical book. ‘Fun Home’ is short for the funeral home Alison’s dad ran when she was a child. It’s a book that blew me away and continues to blow me away every time I read it – and I must have read it five or six times by now: probably the best book I’ve read in the past ten years in any genre or form. It’s an incredibly crafted book in which the chapters are not chronological but thematic, and each chapter is keyed to a book that her father loved. So it’s not a book about what happened to her father, a closeted gay man who committed suicide a few months after Alison herself came out when she was 19. It’s about looking through a family archive to try and get a sense of her father’s particularity. [source]

10

Middlesex

Jeffrey Eugenides

4.5

"I was born twice: first, as a baby girl, on a remarkably smogless Detroit day of January 1960; and then again, as a teenage boy, in an emergency room near Petoskey, Michigan, in August of l974. . . My birth certificate lists my name as Calliope Helen Stephanides. My most recent driver's license...records my first name simply as Cal."

So begins the breathtaking story of Calliope Stephanides and thr

Recommended by Alex Stojkovic and Lisa Feldman Barrett.

Alex Stojkovic

I don’t. But I would. Books love to be used up. (Related: Middlesex is the best book I read in 2019. If you’re look… [source]

Lisa Feldman Barrett

Eugenides does a really nice job of illustrating the complexity of emotional life, the emotional life that doesn’t necessarily fall into neat categories. [source]

11

The Way of the Superior Man: A Spiritual Guide to Mastering the Challenges of Women, Work, and Sexual Desire

David Deida

4.5

Preview Summary

What is your true purpose in life? What do women really want? What makes a good lover? If you're a man reading this, you've undoubtedly asked yourself these questions-but you may not have had much luck answering them. Until now. In The Way of the Superior Man, David Deida explores the most important issues in men's lives--from career and family to women and intimacy to love and spirituality--to of

Recommended by Noah Kagan, Adam Haritan, and Aubrey Marcus.

Noah Kagan

Founder/Sumo

A few months ago, I was drinking a Noah’s Mill whiskey (cute) with my good buddy Brian Balfour and talking about life... During the conversation, we got on the topic of books that changed our lives. I want to share them with you. I judge a book's success if a year later I'm still using at least 1 thing from the book. [source]

Adam Haritan

Additionally, there have been a few books that have been instrumental in helping me figure out my role, purpose, and mission in life. Such books include Iron John: A Book About Men by Robert Bly; King, Warrior, Magician, Lover: Rediscovering the Archetypes of the Mature Masculine by Doug Gillette and Robert L. Moore; and Way Of The Superior Man by David Deida. [source]

12

The Handmaid's Tale

Margaret Atwood

4.4

Before The Testaments, there was The Handmaid’s Tale: an instant classic and eerily prescient cultural phenomenon, from “the patron saint of feminist dystopian fiction” (New York Times).

The Handmaid’s Tale is a novel of such power that the reader will be unable to forget its images and its forecast. Set in the near future, it describes life in what was once the United States and is now called the

Recommended by Daniel Pink, Emma Watson, Catherine Mayer, and 3 others.

Catherine Mayer

Atwood takes all the hard information about gender inequality that she sees around her and then turns it up a few notches. [source]

Cliff Bleszinski

@HandmaidsOnHulu Done. Love the show, book is a classic, can't wait for season 2. [source]

Grady Booch

I read this several years ago but — much like Orwell’s 1984 — it seems particularly relevant given our current political morass. [source]

13

The Perks of Being a Wallflower

Stephen Chbosky

4.4

Read the cult-favorite coming of age story that takes a sometimes heartbreaking, often hysterical, and always honest look at high school in all its glory. Now a major motion picture starring Logan Lerman and Emma Watson, The Perks of Being a Wallflower is a funny, touching, and haunting modern classic.

The critically acclaimed debut novel from Stephen Chbosky, Perks follows observant “wallflower” C

Recommended by Emma Watson, Jamie Grayson, Rae Earl, and 1 others.

Jamie Grayson

Holy shit there’s no way this book is that old because that really ages me but I COMPLETELY agree. This book is a masterpiece and a must-read. Lessons about being human are in there and those are important right now. https://t.co/fF1spEFrUH [source]

Rae Earl

It is a tremendously powerful study of PTSD, a mental health issue that isn’t talked about enough [source]

Richard Speight Jr.

A pal for 30 years, @StephenChbosky ‘s first book #ThePerksofBeingaWallflower had a MASSIVE impact on me & countless others. Then came his great movies. Now..THE NEXT BOOK! Be like me & buy it THE DAY it comes out. (Then harass him until he agrees to put me in the movie! 🎥 🤠) https://t.co/02bMKPgF9A [source]

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14

Opening Up: A Guide to Creating and Sustaining Open Relationships

Tristan Taormino

4.4

Relationship expert and bestselling author Tristan Taormino offers a bold new strategy for creating loving, lasting relationships. Drawing on in-depth interviews with over a hundred women and men, Opening Up explores the real-life benefits and challenges of all styles of open relationships -- from partnered non-monogamy to solo polyamory. With her refreshingly down-to-earth style and sharp wit, Ta

15

The Red Queen: Sex and the Evolution of Human Nature

Matt Ridley

4.4

Referring to Lewis Carroll's Red Queen from Through the Looking-Glass, a character who has to keep running to stay in the same place, Matt Ridley demonstrates why sex is humanity's best strategy for outwitting its constantly mutating internal predators. The Red Queen answers dozens of other riddles of human nature and culture -- including why men propose marriage, the method behind our maddening n

Recommended by Naval Ravikant, Seth Godin, and Aubrey Marcus.

Naval Ravikant

CEO & Co-Founder/AngelList

Getting into the more evolution, science kind of books, I really highly, highly recommend picking up … The Red Queen. [source]

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16

Guide to Getting It On!

Paul Joannides

4.3

This guide replaces taboos with techniques and provides safe, practical advice for improving your sexual relationships. It all comes down to communication and this is one book that has no problem with telling it how it is.

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17

The Purity Myth: How America's Obsession with Virginity is Hurting Young Women

Jessica Valent

4.3

The United States is obsessed with virginity — from the media to schools to government agencies. In The Purity Myth Jessica Valenti argues that the country’s intense focus on chastity is damaging to young women. Through in-depth cultural and social analysis, Valenti reveals that powerful messaging on both extremes — ranging from abstinence curriculum to Girls Gone Wild infomercials — place a young

18

The New Bottoming Book

Janet W. Hardy, Dossie Easton

4.3

Almost a decade ago, the first Bottoming Book taught tens of thousands of people that bottoming - being a submissive, masochist, slave, 'boy' or 'girl, ' or other BDSM recipient -- is as much an art as topping. Since then, the growing popularity of BDSM, and the blossoming of the Internet as a source of information and connection, have created a whole new universe of possibilities for players. Now

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19

Fifty Shades of Grey (Fifty Shades, #1)

E L James

4.3

When literature student Anastasia Steele goes to interview young entrepreneur Christian Grey, she encounters a man who is beautiful, brilliant, and intimidating. The unworldly, innocent Ana is startled to realize she wants this man and, despite his enigmatic reserve, finds she is desperate to get close to him. Unable to resist Ana’s quiet beauty, wit, and independent spirit, Grey admits he wants h

Recommended by Aubrey Marcus.

20

The Art of Seduction

Robert Greene

4.3

Preview Summary

The season's most talked-about all-purpose personal strategy guide and philosophical compendium," said Newsweek of Robert Greene's bold, elegant, and ingenious manual of modern manipulation, The 48 Laws of Power. Now Greene has once again mined history and literature to distill the essence of seduction, the most highly refined mode of influence, the ultimate power trip.

The Art of Seduction is a ma

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21

Yes Means Yes!: Visions of Female Sexual Power and A World Without Rape

Jaclyn Friedman, Jessica Valenti

4.3

In this groundbreaking new look at rape edited by writer and activist Jaclyn Friedman and Full Frontal Feminism and He’s A Stud, She’s A Slut author Jessica Valenti, the way we view rape in our culture is finally dismantled and replaced with a genuine understanding and respect for female sexual pleasure. Feminist, political, and activist writers alike will present their ideas for a paradigm shift

22

The Second Sex

Simone de Beauvoir, Constance Borde, Sheila Malovany-Chevallier

4.3

Newly translated and unabridged in English for the first time, and brilliantly introduced by Judith Thurman, Simone de Beauvoir’s masterpiece weaves together history, philosophy, economics, biology, and a host of other disciplines to analyze the Western notion of “woman” and to explore the power of sexuality.

Sixty years after its initial publication, The Second Sex is still as eye-opening and pert

Recommended by Arianna Huffington, Belinda Jack, Erica Jong, and 1 others.

Arianna Huffington

Founder/The Huffington Post

Great Thrive Questionnaire by @smlafleur, founder of M.M.LaFleur. On the book that changed her life, The Second Sex: "it changed my entire perception about what it means to be a woman, and it may be the unconscious reason behind why I started my company." https://t.co/tudVOb28J2 [source]

Belinda Jack

In making a distinction between sex and gender she drew attention to how much of what women had to contend with was actually something that society imposes. [source]

Erica Jong

The French literary world is incredibly sexist and here was one of their darlings pointing out how much they discriminate. [source]

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23

The Vagina Monologues

Eve Ensler

4.3

I decided to talk to women about their vaginas, to do vagina interviews, which became vagina monologues...At first women were reluctant to talk. They were a little shy. But once they got going, you couldn't stop them. Women secretly love to talk about their vaginas. They get very excited, mainly because no one's ever asked them before.

Recommended by Emma Watson.

24

The New Topping Book

Janet W. Hardy and Dossie Easton

4.3

Tens of thousands learned the emotional and ethical skills of BDSM topping from the first `Topping Book.` Now, in addition to the sage advice and good humor that made the first edition a classic, the authors tackle some of the issues that have come up for tops in the last six years: on-line domination, the challenges and rewards of `lifestyle` relationships, ensuring our own and our partners` safe

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25

More Than Two: A Practical Guide to Ethical Polyamory

Franklin Veaux

4.2

Can you love more than one person? Have multiple romantic partners, without jealousy or cheating? Absolutely! Polyamorous people have been paving the way, through trial and painful error. Now the new book More Than Two can help you find your own way. With completely new material and a fresh approach, Franklin Veaux and Eve Rickert wrote More Than Two to expand on and update the themes and ideas in

26

Come As You Are: Revised and Updated: The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life

Emily Nagoski Ph.D.

4.2

Preview Summary

27

The Erotic Mind: Unlocking the Inner Sources of Passion and Fulfillment

Jack Morin

4.2

Challenging accepted theories about what makes for terrific sex, The Erotic Mind is a breakthrough exploration of the least understood dimensions of human sexuality—the psychology of desire, arousal, and fulfillment. Nationally known sex therapist Dr. Jack Morin offers a bold new perspective that celebrates the joys of Eros without denying its risks.

Based on an in-depth analysis of over 1,000 prov

Recommended by Esther Perel.

Esther Perel

I reread. [source]

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28

Stone Butch Blues

Leslie Feinberg

4.2

Woman or man? This internationally acclaimed novel looks at the world through the eyes of Jess Goldberg, a masculine girl growing up in the "Ozzie and Harriet" McCarthy era and coming out as a young butch lesbian in the pre-Stonewall gay drag bars of a blue-collar town. Stone Butch Blues traces a propulsive journey, powerfully evoking history and politics while portraying an extraordinary protagon

Recommended by Juliet Jacques and Kate Bornstein.

Juliet Jacques

It’s a very traumatic book, it illustrates a lot of problems of cross-gender, or gender-variant, living at the time. [source]

Kate Bornstein

Stone Butch Blues is the trans classic. Everybody who reads it takes away something different. It’s one of those magical books that has an entrance point for every queer person. And that’s an amazing accomplishment for a book. It’s something I aspire to. [source]

29

Girls & Sex: Navigating the Complicated New Landscape

Peggy Orenstein

4.2

NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER

A Time Top 10 Book of the Year • A San Francisco Chronicle Book of the Year

The author of the New York Times bestseller Cinderella Ate My Daughter offers a clear-eyed picture of the new sexual landscape girls face in the post-princess stage—high school through college—and reveals how they are negotiating it.

A generation gap has emerged between parents and their girl

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30

Sexing the Body: Gender Politics and the Construction of Sexuality

Anne Fausto-Sterling

4.2

Why do some people prefer heterosexual love while others fancy the same sex? Is sexual identity biologically determined or a product of convention? In this brilliant and provocative book, the acclaimed author of Myths of Gender argues that even the most fundamental knowledge about sex is shaped by the culture in which scientific knowledge is produced.Drawing on astonishing real-life cases and a pr

Cover unavailable

31

The History of Sexuality, Volume 2: The Use of Pleasure

Michel Foucault, Robert Hurley

4.2

In this sequel to The History of Sexuality, Volume I: An Introduction, the brilliantly original French thinker who died in 1984 gives an analysis of how the ancient Greeks perceived sexuality.

Throughout The Uses of Pleasure Foucault analyzes an irresistible array of ancient Greek texts on eroticism as he tries to answer basic questions: How in the West did sexual experience become a moral issue?

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32

Perv: The Sexual Deviant in All of Us

Jesse Bering

4.2

“As a sex writer, Jesse Bering is fearless—and peerless.” —Dan Savage

“You are a sexual deviant. A pervert, through and through.” We may not want to admit it, but as the award-winning columnist and psychologist Jesse Bering reveals in Perv, there is a spectrum of perversion along which we all sit. Whether it’s voyeurism, exhibitionism, or your run-of-the-mill foot fetish, we all possess a suite of

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33

And the Band Played On: Politics, People, and the AIDS Epidemic

Randy Shilts

4.2

Upon its first publication twenty years ago, And The Band Played on was quickly recognized as a masterpiece of investigatve reporting. An international bestseller, a nominee for the National Book Critics Circle Award, and made into a critically acclaimed movie, Shilts' expose revealed why AIDS was allowed to spread unchecked during the early 80's while the most trusted institutions ignored or deni

Recommended by Arthur Ammann, Clara Jeffery, and Jonathan Rauch.

Arthur Ammann

He was concerned because his friends were infected and some of them were dying. [source]

Clara Jeffery

Book is great but the movie pretty great too and horrifying similar failure of politicized science, just a way shorter timetable now https://t.co/TRUiKs9WTR [source]

Jonathan Rauch

A harrowing vision of what a world without marriage finally looks like. [source]

34

Milk and Honey

Rupi Kaur

4.2

Preview Summary

Milk and Honey is a collection of poetry and prose about survival. About the experience of violence, abuse, love, loss, and femininity.

The book is divided into four chapters, and each chapter serves a different purpose. Deals with a different pain. Heals a different heartache. Milk and Honey takes readers through a journey of the most bitter moments in life and finds sweetness in them because ther

Cover unavailable

35

The Joy of Sex

Alex Comfort

4.2

An international bestseller since it was first published in 1972, this updated edition brings this imaginative, uninhibited guide to lovemaking and sex to a whole new generation. It has been revised in such a way to retain Dr Comfort's original, revelatory advice while making it appropriate for the 21st century.

Recommended by Tyler Cowen, Kate Figes, and Susan Quilliam.

Tyler Cowen

Founder/Marginal Revolution University

Honorable mentions: Jonathan Livingston Seagull, Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance, and The Joy of Sex, all given to me by my mother. I believe they helped inculcate some of the 1960s-70s ethos of individual freedom into my thinking. [source]

Kate Figes

It seems so innocent really now, all those daring explanations of S and M and positions, but it was before Aids and people were so optimistic. It was as though we’d discovered sex and free love. [source]

Susan Quilliam

This was a seminal book. It not only reflected but created the sexual revolution. Even now, people who haven’t read it know what it’s about. [source]

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36

Whipping Girl: A Transsexual Woman on Sexism and the Scapegoating of Femininity

Julia Serano

4.2

In the updated second edition of Whipping Girl, Julia Serano, a transsexual woman whose supremely intelligent writing reflects her diverse background as a lesbian transgender activist and professional biologist, shares her powerful experiences and observation-both pre- and post-transition-to reveal the ways in which fear, suspicion and dismissiveness toward femininity shape our societal attitudes

Recommended by Kate Bornstein.

Kate Bornstein

This is the first analysis that strongly ties the male-to-female transgender experience to misogyny. It goes beyond the individual narrative into a political analysis from a transwoman point of view. Julia called me out for my failure to point out the fact that trans misogyny is evident, in that transsexual women most often bear the brunt of the mainstream – or meanstream – media’s obsession with and demonisation of trans. [source]

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37

The Multi-Orgasmic Man: Sexual Secrets Every Man Should Know

Mantak Chia, Douglas Abrams

4.2

At last, simple physical and psychological techniques that allow men to fulfill their dreams and women's fantasies.

Learn to Separate Orgasm and Ejaculation! Enjoy Increased Vitality and Longevity! Become Multi-Orgasmic Now!

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38

A Billion Wicked Thoughts: What the World's Largest Experiment Reveals about Human Desire

Ogi Ogas, Sai Gaddam

4.2

Two maverick neuroscientists use the world's largest psychology experiment-the Internet-to study the private activities of millions of men and women around the world, unveiling a revolutionary and shocking new vision of human desire that overturns conventional thinking.

For his groundbreaking sexual research, Alfred Kinsey and his team interviewed 18,000 people, relying on them to honestly report

Recommended by Elad Yom-Tov.

39

Three Women

Lisa Taddeo

4.2

Journalist Taddeo reports on the risks women take to fulfill their sexual desires. The result of eight years and thousands of hours of interviews, the book describes how each of her three subjects is undone by an intimate relationship that eventually damaged her.

Maggie, a troubled 23-year-old in Fargo, N.Dak., recalls how her high school English teacher seduced her at 17 after learning she'd slep

Recommended by Gwyneth Paltrow, Abby Wambach, Caitlin Moran, and 3 others.

Gwyneth Paltrow

Actress, Author, Owner/Goop

I literally could not put it down. An unflinching dissection of female desire so poetically described, I forgot it was nonfiction. Lisa Taddeo makes a gorgeous, unabashed debut. Wow. [source]

Abby Wambach

WOLFPACK: Our book is included in the 10 Books People Are Talking About collection on #AppleBooks! I love this list and I’m currently reading & loving @lisadtaddeo’s #ThreeWomen. Check out the full list: https://t.co/f7XTYVe5It. Thank you, @AppleBooks! https://t.co/TXHAsIZumJ [source]

Caitlin Moran

This book - Three Women by @lisadtaddeo - is AMAZING: it's the book you HAVE to read & then make your friends read. I forced @jojomoyes - it's the In Cold Blood of female sexuality. THE book of summer 2019. Three real women tell the true story, over decades, of their sex-lives. https://t.co/VpcSlDLYMW [source]

40

Giovanni’s Room

James Baldwin

4.2

An alternate cover for this ISBN can be found here.

Baldwin's haunting and controversial second novel is his most sustained treatment of sexuality, and a classic of gay literature. In a 1950s Paris swarming with expatriates and characterized by dangerous liaisons and hidden violence, an American finds himself unable to repress his impulses, despite his determination to live the conventional life he

41

The Game: Penetrating the Secret Society of Pickup Artists

Neil Strauss

4.2

Preview Summary

Hidden somewhere, in nearly every major city in the world, is an underground seduction lair. And in these lairs, men trade the most devastatingly effective techniques ever invented to charm women. This is not fiction. These men really exist. They live together in houses known as Projects. And Neil Strauss, the bestselling author, spent two years living among them, using the pseudonym Style to prot

Recommended by Ryan Holiday and Aubrey Marcus.

Ryan Holiday

Author

It probably seems weird to recommend books on pickup artists, pick pockets and con men (nor am I necessarily equating the three groups) but it fits. Though I would accept that most of what these guys do is tactical rather than strategic–they are still quite excellent at identifying opportunities and weaving such flawless, enveloping plans that the marks often have no idea that anything is actually occurring. A favorite con example is the one where the con man sets up a fake boxing match that he agrees to “fix” with his mark. Taking the marks money, he then fakes the fake boxing match so that it appears that one boxers kills the other in the ring. He and the mark then flee the scene in opposite direction to avoid the police–the mark thinking he got away with murder, when really he was robbed. The Game is about seduction, literally, but the other two books are about seduction in their own way as well. These books are all classics and will help you, no matter what you do. [source]

42

Why Is Sex Fun? The Evolution of Human Sexuality (Science Masters)

Jared M. Diamond

4.2

Why are humans one of the few species to have sex in private? Why are human females the only mammals to go through menopause? Why is the human penis so unnecessarily large? There is no more knowledgeable authority than the award-winning author of The Third Chimpanzee to answer these intriguing questions. Here is a delightfully entertaining and enlightening look at the unique sex lives of humans.

43

The Rational Male, #1

Rollo Tomassi

4.2

Preview Summary

The Rational Male is a rational and pragmatic approach to intergender dynamics and the social and psychological underpinnings of intergender relations. The book is the compiled, ten-year core writing of author/blogger Rollo Tomassi from therationalmale.com. Rollo Tomassi is one of the leading voices in the globally growing, male-focused online consortium known as the "Manosphere". Outlined are the

44

The State of Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity

Esther Perel

4.2

Iconic couples’ therapist and bestselling author of Mating in Captivity Esther Perel returns with a provocative look at relationships through the lens of infidelity.

An affair: it can rob a couple of their relationship, their happiness, their very identity. And yet, this extremely common human experience is so poorly understood. What are we to make of this time-honored taboo—universally forbidden y

45

King, Warrior, Magician, Lover: Rediscovering the Archetypes of the Mature Masculine

Robert Moore, Douglas Gillette

4.1

Preview Summary

The corporate "yes man," the wife-beater, the hot-shot male junior executive and the emotionally distant father are all boys pretending to be men, observe the authors of this liberating guide to self-transformation. Writing within a Jungian framework, they perceive symptoms of "Boycaps per book psychology" all around us--in men's abusive behaviors, passivity and inability to act creatively. To hel

Recommended by Adam Haritan.

Adam Haritan

Additionally, there have been a few books that have been instrumental in helping me figure out my role, purpose, and mission in life. Such books include Iron John: A Book About Men by Robert Bly; King, Warrior, Magician, Lover: Rediscovering the Archetypes of the Mature Masculine by Doug Gillette and Robert L. Moore; and Way Of The Superior Man by David Deida. [source]

46

My Secret Garden: Women's Sexual Fantasies

Nancy Friday

4.1

When it first appeared, Nancy Friday's taboo-shattering bestseller "My Secret Garden" created a mixed storm of outrage and exhilaration. Those women who feared their erotic fantasies called it pornographic. Those women who read it recognized in its pages the hidden content of their own sexuality. More outspoken and graphic than any book before its time, "My Secret Garden" quickly became a classic

47

Urban Tantra, Second Edition: Sacred Sex for the Twenty-First Century

Barbara Carrellas

4.1

If you think sexual and spiritual bliss can't be found in today's fast-paced world, you haven't experienced Urban Tantra. Celebrating the 10th anniversary of Urban Tantra, acclaimed sex educator Barbara Carrellas radically updates the ancient practice of Tantra for modern sexual explorers desiring to discover new frontiers. With a juicy mix of erotic how-to and heart-centered spiritual wisdom, thi

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48

Tipping the Velvet

Sarah Waters

4.1

Nan King, an oyster girl, is captivated by the music hall phenomenon Kitty Butler, a male impersonator extraordinaire treading the boards in Canterbury. Through a friend at the box office, Nan manages to visit all her shows and finally meet her heroine. Soon after, she becomes Kitty's dresser and the two head for the bright lights of Leicester Square where they begin a glittering career as music-h

Recommended by Vanora Bennett.

Vanora Bennett

It is. It’s about a girl named Nan who goes off to the Pantomime Theatre, which is on the South Coast of England, and sees a girl named Kitty, who is a male impersonator, on the stage and falls in love with her. You’re not sure if it’s a sexual love or a girlish crush but she does go off to London with her and it does turn into a love affair. They begin living together but it becomes complicated because they have to hide. Then Kitty falls in love with a man and Nan is heartbroken and goes off into this strange Edwardian underworld. She sets off as a male-impersonating prostitute for a little bit and goes off with men who think she is a boy, and it’s all very odd. She then gets taken in by an aristocratic woman who wants to keep her as a mistress. Finally, she ends up living with a family who are poor and hardworking and who are saving the underclass from themselves. At this point, all these lovers from her past come back and she has to choose. You feel she is going to go off with Kitty, but is she? [source]

49

The Complete Illustrated Kama Sutra

Vatsyāyana

4.1

A fully illustrated Kama Sutra from the extraordinary and rare art collection of Lance Dane

• The first complete translation to illustrate all 64 sexual postures described in the Kama Sutra

• Includes 269 rare images

• Composed by one of the world’s foremost scholars of the Kama Sutra and Indian art

The erotic sentiments described in the Hindu love classic the Kama Sutra constitute the most famous

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50

Straight: The Surprisingly Short History Of Heterosexuality

Hanne Blank

4.1

Like the typewriter and the light bulb, the heterosexual was invented in the 1860s and swiftly transformed Western culture. The idea of “the heterosexual” was unprecedented. After all, men and women had been having sex, marrying, building families, and sometimes even falling in love for millennia without having any special name for their emotions or acts. Yet, within half a century, “heterosexual”

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51

Shameless: A Sexual Reformation

Nadia Bolz-Weber and Random House Audi

4.1

Raw, intimate, and timely, Nadia Bolz-Weber's latest book offers a full-blown overhaul of our harmful and antiquated ideas about sex, gender, and our bodies.

Christians are obsessed with sex. But not in a good way. For generations countless people have suffered pain, guilt, and judgment as a result of this toxic fixation on sex, the body, and physical pleasure. In the follow-up to her celebrated

52

Intimate Matters: A History of Sexuality in America

John D'Emilio and Estelle B. Freedman

4.1

The 1st full length study of the history of American sexuality, Intimate Matters offers trenchant insights into sexual behavior from colonial times to today. D'Emilio & Freedman give a deeper understanding of how sexuality has dramatically influenced politics & culture throughout history.
"The book John D'Emilio co-wrote with Estelle B. Freedman, Intimate Matters, was cited by Supreme Court Justic

53

The Man's Guide to Women: Scientifically Proven Secrets from the "Love Lab" About What Women Really Want

John Gottman

4.1

Preview Summary

Results from world-renowned relationship expert John Gottman’s famous Love Lab have proven an incredible truth: Men make or break relationships. Based on 40 years of research, The Man’s Guide to Women unlocks the mystery of how to attract, satisfy, and succeed with a woman for a lifetime. For the first time ever, there is a science-based answer to the age-old question: What do women really want in

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Women's Anatomy Of Arousal: Secret Maps To Buried Pleasure

Sheri Winston CNM. RN. BSN. LMT

4.1

Women have a largely unknown network of structures responsible for arousal and orgasm that their owners and even most medical professionals don't know about. We're not just talking about Ye Olde G-Spot here. Women have an entire erectile network that, if properly stimulated, can elevate their erotic experience from "Oh!" to "Oh! Oh! Oh!"

Join celebrated sexuality teacher Sheri Winston as she integr

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55

Vagina: A New Biography

Naomi Wolf

4.1

An astonishing work of cutting-edge science and cultural history that radically reframes how we understand the vagina—and consequently, how we understand women—from one of our most respected cultural critics and thinkers, Naomi Wolf, author of the modern classic The Beauty Myth.

When an unexpected medical crisis sends Naomi Wolf on a deeply personal journey to tease out the intersections between se

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56

My Horizontal Life: A Collection of One-Night Stands

Chelsea Handler

4.1

You've either done it or know someone who has: the one-night stand, the familiar outcome of a night spent at a bar, sometimes the sole payoff for your friend's irritating wedding, or the only relief from a disastrous vacation. Often embarrassing and uncomfortable, occasionally outlandish, but most times just a necessary and irresistible evil, the one-night stand is a social rite as old as sex itse

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57

The Argonauts

Maggie Nelson

4.1

A timely and genre-bending memoir that offers fresh and fierce reflections on motherhood, desire, identity and feminism.

At the centre of The Argonauts is the love story between Maggie Nelson and the artist Harry Dodge, who is fluidly gendered. As Nelson undergoes the transformations of pregnancy, she explores the challenges and complexities of mothering and queer family making.

Writing in the tradi

Recommended by Emma Watson, Daegan Miller, and Katie Kitamura.

Daegan Miller

It is, at heart, a long discussion of relationship: how we relate to others. [source]

Katie Kitamura

Nelson’s relationship doesn’t fit into neat categories, and she forcefully critiques the binaries of our society. [source]

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58

Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda (Simonverse, #1)

Becky Albertalli

4.1

Sixteen-year-old and not-so-openly gay Simon Spier prefers to save his drama for the school musical. But when an email falls into the wrong hands, his secret is at risk of being thrust into the spotlight. Now Simon is actually being blackmailed: if he doesn’t play wingman for class clown Martin, his sexual identity will become everyone’s business. Worse, the privacy of Blue, the pen name of the bo

59

The Color Purple

Alice Walker

4.1

The Color Purple is a classic. With over a million copies sold in the UK alone, it is hailed as one of the all-time 'greats' of literature, inspiring generations of readers.

Set in the deep American South between the wars, it is the tale of Celie, a young black girl born into poverty and segregation. Raped repeatedly by the man she calls 'father', she has two children taken away from her, is separa

Recommended by Emma Watson.

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60

Oranges Are Not the Only Fruit

Jeanette Winterson

4.1

Alternate cover edition for 9780802135162

This is the story of Jeanette, adopted and brought up by her mother as one of God's elect. Zealous and passionate, she seems seems destined for life as a missionary, but then she falls for one of her converts.

At sixteen, Jeanette decides to leave the church, her home and her family, for the young woman she loves. Innovative, punchy and tender,

Oranges Are No

Recommended by Emma Watson.

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61

Our Bodies, Ourselves for the New Century

Boston womens health book

4.1

Our Bodies, Ourselves is the resource that women of all ages turn to for information about their bodies, sexuality, and reproductive health. Completely revised and updated, these pages provide women with the information and tools they need to make key health decisions—accurate, evidence-based information, input from leading experts, and personal stories from women who share their experiences. This

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62

Cunt: A Declaration of Independence

Inga Muscio, Betty Dodson

4.1

An ancient title of respect for women, the word cunt long ago veered off this noble path. Inga Muscio traces the road from honor to expletive, giving women the motivation and tools to claim cunt as a positive and powerful force in their lives. In this fully revised edition, she explores, with candidness and humor, such traditional feminist issues as birth control, sexuality, jealousy between women

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63

Delusions of Gender: How Our Minds, Society, and Neurosexism Create Difference

Cordelia Fine

4.1

It’s the twenty-first century, and although we tried to rear unisex children--boys who play with dolls and girls who like trucks--we failed. Even though the glass ceiling is cracked, most women stay comfortably beneath it, and everywhere we hear about vitally important “hardwired” differences between male and female brains. The neuroscience we read about in magazines, newspaper articles, books, an

Recommended by Nicholas Epley.

Nicholas Epley

Cornelia’s book is a rigorous walk through the scientific literature that presents the facts about gender differences. She blows up a lot of the popular books which posited that ‘men are from Mars and women are from Venus’ and described the male and female brain as fundamentally different. Cordelia’s book puts the real and relatively small differences between men and women into perspective. [source]

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64

SM 101: A Realistic Introduction

Jay Wiseman

4.1

Call it what you like - bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, sadomasochism. More and more people are experimenting with this exciting , consensual form of erotic play. SM 101 is your basic guidebook to safe rewarding SM. This book includes: finding partners, negotiating the scene you want, bondage techniques, spanking and whipping, erotic torture, role playing, related practices, phys

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65

Sex for One: The Joy of Selfloving

Betty Dodson

4.1

For more than 20 years, Betty Dodson has been dedicated to taking the shame out of masturbation, showing it to be a healthy form of sexual expression. With warmth and intelligence, and informative line drawings, Dodson explains how anyone can learn to fully enjoy the pleasures of self-love, pointing out that masturbation is still the safest sex.

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66

Delta of Venus

Anais Nin

4.1

In Delta of Venus Anaïs Nin penned a lush, magical world where the characters of her imagination possess the most universal of desires and exceptional of talents. Among these provocative stories, a Hungarian adventurer seduces wealthy women then vanishes with their money; a veiled woman selects strangers from a chic restaurant for private trysts; and a Parisian hatmaker named Mathilde leaves her h

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67

The History of Sexuality, Volume 3: The Care of the Self

Michel Foucault, Robert Hurley

4.1

Michel Foucault takes us into the first two centuries of our own era, into the Golden Age of Rome, to reveal a subtle but decisive break from the classical Greek vision of sexual pleasure. He skillfully explores the whole corpus of moral reflection among philosophers (Plutarch, Epictetus, Marcus Aurelius, Seneca) and physicians of the era, and uncovers an increasing mistrust of pleasure and growin

68

The Evolution Of Desire: Strategies of Human Mating

David M. Buss

4.1

If we all want love, why is there so much conflict in our most cherished relationships? To answer this question, says noted psychologist David Buss, we must look into our evolutionary past. Based on the most massive study of human mating ever undertaken, encompassing more than 10,000 people of all ages from thirty-seven cultures worldwide, The Evolution of Desire is the first book to present a uni

Recommended by Satoshi Kanazawa.

Satoshi Kanazawa

Men sought youth and physical attractiveness in their mates, whereas women sought resources and status in theirs. [source]

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69

Gender Trouble: Feminism and the Subversion of Identity

Judith Butler

4.1

Since its publication in 1990, Gender Trouble has become one of the key works of contemporary feminist theory, and an essential work for anyone interested in the study of gender, queer theory, or the politics of sexuality in culture. This is the text where Judith Butler began to advance the ideas that would go on to take life as "performativity theory," as well as some of the first articulations o

70

Pornland: How Porn Has Hijacked Our Sexuality

Gail Dines

4.1

Professor Gail Dines has written about and researched the porn industry for over two decades. She attends industry conferences, interviews producers and performers, and speaks to hundreds of men and women each year about their experience with porn. Students and educators describe her work as "life changing."

In Pornland—the culmination of her life's work—Dines takes an unflinching look at porn and

Marty Klein

4.1

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77

Rethinking Sexuality: God's Design and Why It Matters

Dr. Juli Slattery and Gary Thomas

4.0

This ground-breaking resource challenges and equips Christians to think and act biblically and compassionately in matters of sexuality.

Sexual abuse, sex addiction, gender confusion, brokenness, and shame plague today's world, and people are seeking clarity and hope. By contesting long-held cultural paradigms, this book equips you to see how sexuality is rooted in the broader context of God's heart

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78

Modern Romance

Aziz Ansari, Eric Klinenberg

4.0

Now a New York Times Bestseller

A hilarious, thoughtful, and in-depth exploration of the pleasures and perils of modern romance from one of this generation’s sharpest comedic voices

At some point, every one of us embarks on a journey to find love. We meet people, date, get into and out of relationships, all with the hope of finding someone with whom we share a deep connection. This seems standard no

Recommended by Emma Watson and Deepak Chhugani.

Deepak Chhugani

My favorite book in recent years has been Modern Romance by Aziz Ansari. It was very funny and put into perspective some very entertaining examples of generation gaps and cultural differences I’ve witnessed first-hand, growing up at the intersection of Asian (Indian parents), Latin American (grew up in Ecuador) and US culture (I’ve lived here for ~7 years now). [source]

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79

Lady Chatterley's Lover

D.H. Lawrence

4.0

Lawrence's frank portrayal of an extramarital affair and the explicit sexual explorations of it's central characters caused this controversial book, now considered a masterpiece, to be banned as pornography until 1960.

Recommended by Anthony Julius.

Anthony Julius

Of course, this book was also the object of censoring attention, culminating in a couple of trials (one in the States and one in Britain). But it’s also itself about the violation of norms – in this case, the violation of the marriage contract and the norm of monogamous living. [source]

90

The Come as You Are Workbook: A Practical Guide to the Science of Sex

Emily Nagoski Ph.D.

4.0

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91

Eleven Minutes

Paulo Coelho, Margaret Jull Costa

4.0

Eleven Minutes is the story of Maria, a young girl from a Brazilian village, whose first innocent brushes with love leave her heartbroken. At a tender age, she becomes convinced that she will never find true love, instead believing that “love is a terrible thing that will make you suffer. . . .” A chance meeting in Rio takes her to Geneva, where she dreams of finding fame and fortune.

Maria’s despa

Recommended by Darshan Gajara.

Darshan Gajara

My favorite non-business book from the limited number of books I’ve read is ‘Eleven Minutes’ by Paulo Coelho. I was 17 when I picked up this book. And like any other small town boy in India, self-discovery, adventure and sex were foreign entities to me. Going through Maria’s story (main character in the book) alone, my eyes were wide open to the outside world and provided me with courage to break free from my own little bubble and start exploring. [source]

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92

Sperm Wars: Infidelity, Sexual Conflict, and Other Bedroom Battles

Robin Baker

4.0

Recommended by Brian Armstrong.

93

Pleasure Activism: The Politics of Feeling Good (Emergent Strategy)

adrienne maree brown

4.0

How do we make social justice the most pleasurable human experience? How can we awaken within ourselves desires that make it impossible to settle for anything less than a fulfilling life? Editor adrienne maree brown finds the answer in something she calls "Pleasure Activism," a politics of healing and happiness that explodes the dour myth that changing the world is just another form of work. Drawi

Recommended by Danielle Morrill.

Danielle Morrill

Co-founder/Mattermark

@natatouille What a lucky body, to have a mind like this to consider it so thoughtfully. I deeply enjoy your writing and if you haven’t seen it, maybe check out the book “Pleasure Activism” [source]

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94

The Invisible Orientation: An Introduction to Asexuality

Julie Sondra Decker

4.0

What if you weren't sexually attracted to anyone?

A growing number of people are identifying as asexual. They aren't sexually attracted to anyone, and they consider it a sexual orientation—like gay, straight, or bisexual.

Asexuality is the invisible orientation. Most people believe that "everyone" wants sex, that "everyone" understands what it means to be attracted to other people, and that "everyon

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95

Sex, Time, and Power: How Women's Sexuality Shaped Human Evolution

Leonard Shlain

4.0

Why did big-brained Homo sapiens suddenly emerge some 150,000 years ago? The key, according to Leonard Shlain, is female sexuality. Drawing on an awesome breadth of research, he shows how, long ago, the narrowness of the newly bipedal human female's pelvis and the increasing size of infants' heads precipitated a crisis for the species.

Natural selection allowed for the adaptation of the human fema

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96

The Scarlet Letter

Nathaniel Hawthorne, Thomas E. Connolly, Nina Baym

4.0

Nathaniel Hawthorne's THE SCARLET LETTER reaches to our nation's historical and moral roots for the material of great tragedy. Set in an early New England colony, the novel shows the terrible impact a single, passionate act has on the lives of three members of the community: the defiant Hester Prynne; the fiery, tortured Reverend Dimmesdale; and the obsessed, vengeful Chillingworth.

With THE SCARLE

Recommended by Carol Gilligan.

Carol Gilligan

The Scarlet Letter is a tragic love story, but it’s also a story about resistance and transformation. [source]

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97

Ultimate Guide to Kink: BDSM, Role Play and the Erotic Edge

Tristan Taormino, Barbara Carrellas

4.0

The Ultimate Guide to Kink is the first major guide to BDSM in a generation--a bold and sexy collection of essays that run the gamut from expert how-to tutorials to provocative essays that delve into complex questions about desire, power, and pleasure. The book brings together diverse voices from the kink community in an unprecedented way: each chapter is written by a different sexuality/BDSM educ

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98

Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns: The Romance and Sexual Sorcery of Sadomasochism

Philip Miller, Molly Devon

4.0

Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns will tell you all about sadomasochism. We made it light-hearted and fun to read because SM is fun to do. That's why we do it. But fun is only SM's overture; for those who grasp its message, SM is sexual magic. The right blend of trust, fantasy, and sensuality creates an intensely erotic and deeply intimate stew. We take away our lovers' freedom and lead them to

99

Playing Well with Others: Your Field Guide to Discovering, Exploring and Navigating the Kink, Leather and Bdsm Communities

Lee Harrington, Mollena Williams

4.0

Whether you're a trembling novice or a jaded expert, there's always something new to be discovered in the endlessly changing, complex and titillating world of kink. While there are plenty of other books out there that explain how to give a spanking or tie a half-hitch, Playing Well With Others is the first book that explains kink *culture* -- the munches, parties, leather bars, conferences, worksh

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100

Good Vibrations Guide to Sex: The Most Complete Sex Manual Ever Written

Cathy Winks, Anne Semans

4.0

For ALL readers--women and men, heterosexual or lesbian, gay, or bisexual--this candid, upbeat guide offers expert advice on all aspects of sexuality:

• How to talk about sex and keep your relationships sizzling
• Orgasms--G-spot, female ejaculation, and multiple orgasms for both men and women
• "If you want the job done right, do it yourself"--Expanded section on masturbation
• NEW! Sex Over a Lifeti