This section explores how women's self-perceptions and beliefs about their own worth can create barriers to their negotiating effectively. The authors argue that women often undervalue their capabilities and accomplishments, perceive themselves as less entitled, and downplay their bargaining power, resulting in a reduced level of confidence during negotiations and a greater inclination to concede, thereby limiting the benefits they could obtain from these engagements.
The authors point out that women often struggle with a lack of confidence and self-assurance in their capabilities, particularly in negotiation scenarios, even though they are well-qualified and have a strong track record of achievements. The authors describe a scenario where Liliane, a skilled software engineer, unintentionally conveyed doubts regarding her own worth by telling the hiring manager that her primary concern was obtaining the position, rather than the compensation. She was dismayed to learn that the pay she received from her superiors was set at the lowest acceptable level for her position. After ten years, she successfully corrected the disparity at her job by altering the environment of her career. Societal norms and ingrained insecurities often lead many women to undervalue their worth in the professional realm.
Several factors contribute to this problem. The persistent custom of women performing household duties without monetary reward has resulted in an absence of proficiency in evaluating their work's financial worth. The authors emphasize a prevalent social inclination to diminish the importance of roles frequently linked with women, particularly in acknowledging the economic value of activities such as child-rearing. Women who commit to raising children often go unrecognized for their efforts, even though it's clear that their role is economically vital to society. They bolster their argument by citing Ann Crittenden's work in "The Price of Motherhood," which suggests that a significant portion of wealth, particularly two-thirds, is derived from the collective skills, creativity, and enterprising nature known as 'human capital.' Economist Shirley Burggraf's viewpoint is that the primary architects of our economy's prosperity are parents who meticulously care for their children.
Babcock and Lashever argue that women often undervalue themselves by relying on unsuitable benchmarks for comparison, despite understanding the significance of being informed about the typical remuneration for specific positions. Women often establish circumstances in which they settle for less by commonly benchmarking their accomplishments against those of their female peers, whereas men tend to gauge their own successes by comparing them with the achievements of their male counterparts. Men often compare their income with individuals who have higher salaries, whereas women generally assess their own pay by looking at those with lower earnings. Angela, a lobbyist navigating the political pathways of Capitol Hill, began to doubt...
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This section explores the social influences that frequently discourage women from pursuing their needs and wants more assertively, even when their demands are fair and reasonable. Babcock and Laschever delve into the societal expectations that encourage women to value humility and selflessness, alongside the consideration for the well-being of others, while also scrutinizing the negative consequences women encounter when they stray from these norms.
The book emphasizes societal expectations that compel women to place a higher value on amiability, to put the needs of others ahead of their own, and to avoid championing their own interests. Magazines catering to women often feature articles designed to help with issues of self-worth, a type of content that is rarely found in men's magazines. The authors underscore societal biases by analyzing the situation of Linda Evangelista, a trailblazing supermodel, who was widely criticized for openly stating to a reporter that she wouldn't get out of bed for less than $10,000...
This section delves into how psychological and emotional factors, such as apprehension and the tendency among women to prioritize interpersonal connections, exacerbate the challenges posed by cultural and societal constraints. These elements frequently lead to women setting less lofty goals and showing a greater propensity to compromise during negotiations, typically leading to less advantageous results.
This section explores the notion that women's reluctance to negotiate can negatively impact both their participation in such discussions and the outcomes they achieve. Women frequently experience greater anxiety than men in various bargaining situations, such as when buying a car or settling the conditions of a job. Gabriela, who holds a top position at a renowned symphony orchestra, frequently participates in discussions with unions, foundations, and performance spaces to promote her organization's objectives. Gabriela is reluctant to ask for a higher salary, knowing that it could lead to enhanced income and increased respect from her board of directors.
Women Don't Ask
This is the best summary of How to Win Friends and Influence People I've ever read. The way you explained the ideas and connected them to other books was amazing.