This section details McBride's early experiences realizing she was female, despite being born a boy. She outlines the impact of societal gender norms and the absence of representation during her childhood. It culminates in her coming out to her parents as transgender, marking a turning point in embracing her identity.
McBride felt a strong internal conflict between her desire to achieve her dreams and her gender identity. Since childhood, she loved politics and envisioned a future in public service. However, she believed it was impossible to have a successful career while also being openly transgender. She recounts moments like putting on a Cinderella dress that belonged to a neighbor, finding solace in that expression, but fearing that it was incompatible with the life she hoped to live.
McBride felt drawn to historical figures like Abraham Lincoln and Franklin D. Roosevelt, fascinated by their roles in enacting societal transformation. However, seeing that nobody similar to her held positions of power, she rationalized that changing the world might be a more attainable goal than being herself. This tension led her to focus on pursuing a career in politics, working on campaigns for Delaware politicians Jack Markell and Beau Biden, even while grappling with her own internal struggles.
Practical Tips
- Start a journal to document the intersection of your career ambitions and personal identity. Writing can help you navigate conflicts and find clarity. You might write about challenges you face in reconciling these parts of yourself, or about role models who have successfully integrated their identity with their career.
- Set up a private Pinterest board or digital collage where you can collect images, quotes, and items that resonate with your gender expression. This visual collection can serve as a source of inspiration and affirmation for your identity. You might pin images of outfits, role models, or art that reflects the gender expression you feel connected to.
- Create a "Dinner Table Debate" tradition with friends or family where you discuss how historical figures might approach modern problems. Assign each person a figure to represent, and debate solutions to a current issue, encouraging participants to embody the leadership qualities and societal impact of their assigned figure.
- Start a "change journal" where you document small actions you take each day that contribute to the change you wish to see in the world. This could be as simple as educating yourself on a social issue, volunteering in your community, or starting conversations about change with friends and family. The key is to recognize and celebrate the impact of small, consistent actions over time.
- Volunteer for a local political campaign to gain firsthand experience. This will give you a taste of the political environment and help you understand the day-to-day work involved in politics. You could start by offering to help with social media, door-to-door canvassing, or event organization.
- Reflect on your personal challenges and set boundaries to maintain mental health while engaging in demanding activities. Keep a journal to track your feelings and stress levels when working on intense projects, like a political campaign. This will help you identify when you need to step back and take care of yourself.
McBride hid her transgender identity for over two decades, fearing rejection and the possibility of losing everything. She dated girls, presented as a cisgender boy, and worked tirelessly on political campaigns, attempting to compartmentalize and rationalize her truth away. Eventually, the emotional toll became too great, and she came out to her close confidante, Helen, who offered unconditional love and support. This validation helped McBride accept herself more fully.
When she revealed her identity to her parents on Christmas Eve, their initial reaction was a mix of grief and shock. They worried about her future, fearing she would be discriminated against and unable to find love or happiness. However, with time and the support of McBride's brother Sean, they accepted her identity and pledged to stand by her. McBride's coming-out announcement on Facebook as student body president at American University was met with overwhelming positivity and acceptance from her classmates, highlighting the power of community and visibility.
Practical Tips
- Develop a "safe sharing" plan that outlines steps to gradually reveal your identity to a trusted circle. Begin by identifying individuals who have shown themselves to be open-minded and supportive in the past. Plan low-risk, private conversations with these individuals where you can share aspects of your identity at your own pace. This strategy allows you to build a support network while maintaining control over your narrative.
- Engage in art therapy activities, such as drawing or painting, to express your internal conflicts and truths non-verbally. Sometimes, visual expression can unearth feelings and truths that are hard to articulate with words. You could create a series of artworks that represent different aspects of your identity or moments when you felt you weren't being true to yourself.
- Develop a "role-resume" for each identity you hold. Similar to a professional resume, create a document for each role you play in life, listing the skills, accomplishments, and responsibilities you have in that area. This exercise can help you rationalize and appreciate the diverse parts of your identity, recognizing the strengths and experiences you bring to each role.
- Start a personal authenticity journal where you document moments you feel you're not being true to yourself. This can help...
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This section outlines McBride's work advocating for transgender rights, beginning with her involvement in the campaign for protections against discrimination in Delaware. It details how she strategizes to lobby legislators, build coalitions, and combat misinformation from groups opposed to LGBTQ+ rights. The section then expands to her advocacy on the national stage, culminating in her historic speech at the 2016 Democratic National Convention.
McBride recounts her work to get Delaware's 2013 legislation on nondiscrimination for gender identity passed. Working alongside Equality Delaware and the HRC, she leveraged her personal story and her relationships with politicians like Governor Jack Markell and Attorney General Beau Biden to build support for the bill. She describes the challenges of lobbying legislators, the value of cultivating compassion, and the need to counter the hateful rhetoric from anti-LGBTQ groups like Delaware's Family Policy Council.
One key takeaway from the author's account is how crucial personal narratives are in changing opinions and attitudes. She notes how legislators often...
This section brings together the themes of identity, self-acceptance, and the broader impact of the movement for transgender equality. It details McBride’s own transformation from internalized shame to outward pride and her dedication to using her platform to empower others.
The author's personal journey demonstrates the transformative power of accepting herself. McBride transformed her own internalized guilt and apprehension into something that strengthened her, using her experiences to uplift and empower others. This section details her evolution from striving to "pass" as a cis woman to embracing her trans identity.
McBride describes the empowering realization that being transgender is not a weakness or something to downplay, but rather an inherent part of her identity that she can celebrate. This section captures her shift from aspiring to assimilate with cisgender individuals to recognizing the importance of visibility and representation.
This change came about through the help of her community, the love of Andy, and her own personal growth. She recognizes the privileges she has...
This is the best summary of How to Win Friends and Influence People I've ever read. The way you explained the ideas and connected them to other books was amazing.
This final section provides a broader perspective on the ongoing struggle for equal rights for LGBTQ individuals in America. It celebrates the victories achieved by the community over the last few decades, while also addressing the persistent discrimination and attacks that threaten our progress. It concludes with a call to action, urging readers to participate.
McBride celebrates the historic victories for equality among LGBTQ people, including nationwide marriage equality and increasing visibility for trans individuals. She highlights the importance of these milestones, both in their substantive impact and in their symbolic value in reflecting a broader shift in public attitudes and societal norms.
The past two decades have seen a substantial rise in public support for LGBTQ rights. McBride attributes this shift to a number of factors, including a growing number of people coming out and sharing their stories, positive media representation of LGBTQ individuals and their lives, and the persistent efforts of organizations and activists...
Tomorrow Will Be Different