Book SummaryThe Way of Integrity, by Martha Beck

1-Page Summary1-Page Book Summary of The Way of Integrity

The Way of Integrity is a guide to living in alignment with your true self. Author Martha Beck argues that deep down, you know who you want to be and what you want to do with your life. She contends that the greatest source of chronic misery is living out of alignment with these wants. Therefore, the solution to chronic unhappiness is getting in touch with this deeper self to discover what you want the most, and then changing the beliefs and behaviors that are holding you back.

Beck is a life coach, columnist, and best-selling author. She draws her lessons from...

The Way of Integrity Summary Part 1: What Is Integrity?

Beck defines integrity as the psychological state of living in accordance with your own personal nature. To gain some clarity on Beck’s concept of integrity, we’ll first define her understanding of your personal nature, and then look at what it means to live in accordance with it. Then we'll explore how you can become misaligned with your nature by internalizing messages from your culture, how living out of alignment causes chronic unhappiness, and finally, how to tell if you are misaligned.

What Is “Your Personal Nature”?

Beck argues that at your deepest level of self, you know what will make you happy and what kind of life you want to lead. You also know how you feel, and what is true about your own life. This deepest level of self is your personal nature. Your nature constitutes a sort of bedrock for your psychology and personality. You may experience your personal nature in the form of intuitions or deep personal yearnings, or—as we’ll see throughout this guide—a sense that something is “off” in your life when you stray too far from your nature.

Is There a "True Self?"

Many psychologists agree with Beck's assertion that there is a core self...

The Way of Integrity Summary Part 2: The Process of Realignment

Beck argues that the only way to overcome the chronic misery of misalignment is through a process of realignment. However, this process is neither easy nor immediate. Realignment is often painful, frightening, challenging, and time-consuming. Furthermore, we may have to go through this process several times as we become misaligned in different aspects of our lives. However, Beck argues that it will be worth it to trade a life of chronic psychological misery for one of happiness and well-being.

In this section, we'll explore Beck’s four stages of realignment: discovering our false beliefs, challenging those false beliefs, living with integrity, and transformation.

Realignment Stage #1: Discover False Beliefs

Recall that we fall out of alignment by internalizing false beliefs from our culture. Beck argues that the path to realignment begins with discovering and recognizing these false beliefs. In this section, we'll discuss Beck’s three techniques for discovering your false beliefs. She advises you to find a mentor, move inward toward your brain’s zones of denial, and then patiently observe your most painful thoughts and feelings.

1) Find a Teacher

Beck...

Shortform Exercise: Reflect on Your Inner Desires

Beck argues that one of the three most important parts of living with integrity is spending your time doing what you actually want to do. In this exercise, you'll have a chance to reflect on what you'd like to do most and how to make time for it.

Imagine a life of complete freedom without expectations from others. What would you spend your time doing if you could spend your time any way you wanted?

Shortform Exercise: Discover and Challenge False Beliefs

Beck explains that often we fall out of alignment because we believe things about ourselves and our lives that are simply not true. In this exercise, you'll have a chance to identify and challenge a belief that might be holding you back.

Beck argues that we can find our mind's “forbidden zones” by looking at the topics that make us most anxious. Are there any topics that make you so anxious you avoid thinking about them? Explain what they are, and what about them makes you so anxious.