Throughout history, women have faced different challenges than men in the realms of mating and reproduction. The characteristics sought in a mate have been shaped by the challenges encountered, thereby exerting evolutionary pressure on males. Women's desire for commitment, resources, protection, and good genes has driven the evolution of men's strategies for acquiring and displaying these assets. Understanding the preferences of women allows us to unravel the often enigmatic and puzzling behaviors of men in the context of mating.
Buss posits that the considerable commitment required for childbirth and child-rearing has caused women to evolve a strong preference for choosing mates who can offer support and resources. Women's choices have historically been influenced by their more significant biological investment in reproduction. A woman's likelihood of surviving increased when she chose a mate capable of providing food and protection, advantages that her children also enjoyed. A woman's likelihood of reproductive success was enhanced by a partner with resources, as it raised the probability that her offspring would survive to continue her genetic legacy.
Economic Resources: Women have traditionally looked for partners who can provide consistent financial support in long-term relationships due to their larger share of responsibilities in raising children. Buss's extensive study, covering 37 distinct cultures, shows that when selecting a mate, women prioritize a partner's economic prospects more than men do. This tendency is a core element of evolutionary progression, consistently manifesting across diverse generations and economic systems. Women recognize that their likelihood of surviving times of food scarcity, environmental challenges, or intergroup conflicts is improved by forming alliances with individuals who demonstrate a reliable capacity to procure and provide resources. In seeking a lasting relationship, women highly valued a man's economic security, the prestige associated with his career, and his willingness to share his wealth.
Social standing: Women from various cultures tend to favor men with substantial social status, which often signals their ability to manage resources and suggests a higher probability of providing for their children's well-being. Buss highlights that in human societies, individuals who ascend the social ladder invariably attract resources. Men who rise to higher ranks in their social structures frequently gain improved access to vital resources like sustenance, land, and safety. A partner with high social standing can improve the opportunities for their offspring to participate in advantageous social exchanges, thereby boosting their potential to create beneficial partnerships and gain valuable resources. Women's attraction to men with high status is not solely about ascending the social hierarchy; it represents a strategic choice to guarantee that their children will have a reliable provider, a strong protector, and a mate capable of enhancing their children's social standing. Buss explains that women often look for partners who have a higher social and economic standing.
Age: The adaptive advantage of women selecting older males emerges because they have accumulated resources and demonstrate a more predictable provisioning capacity. Women typically are attracted to men who possess a greater amount of life experience than their own. Men usually reach the peak of their resource gathering and social standing at an age that aligns with the typical age gap of approximately three and a half years. Mature men are often preferred for long-term relationships because they are perceived as more emotionally stable, reliable, and capable of providing for a family. Buss highlights that women tend to prefer men with potential for future resource and status acquisition over those who have reached their peak, pointing out that they usually look for a partner who is typically around three and a half years older than they are. Women generally prefer partners of a similar age because of worries regarding the decline in a man's health and the uncertainty of his life span.
Buss posits that the traits of ambition and industriousness are sought after by women in partners as indicators of their potential to consistently secure resources, thereby satisfying her need for a dependable supporter and contributor. These preferences aim to identify a partner likely to have significant resources and status, especially in situations where it's not feasible to directly assess a man's current economic standing.
Unlock the full book summary of The Evolution Of Desire by signing up for Shortform.
Shortform summaries help you learn 10x better by:
Here's a preview of the rest of Shortform's The Evolution Of Desire summary: