This is a preview of the Shortform book summary of Texts So Good He Can't Ignore by Bruce Bryans.
Read Full Summary

1-Page Summary1-Page Book Summary of Texts So Good He Can't Ignore

Approaches for crafting messages that demonstrate self-respect and command a man's respect.

This section underscores the significance of developing messaging practices that demonstrate your value as an extraordinary woman. Bryans emphasizes the crucial importance of text messaging as a tool for building relationships, but he also warns that it can lead to misunderstandings. Women should therefore compose text messages that demonstrate their confidence, values, and emotional intelligence.

Avoid using excessive laughter to mask feelings of insecurity.

A woman's confident and genuine manner of texting is more captivating than often peppering her messages with phrases like 'lol' or 'haha' to appear nonchalant.

Bryans suggests that frequently using terms such as "lol" or "haha" in messages, especially as a safeguard against potential rejection, could indicate an absence of self-assurance. Men often sense when a woman uses humor not just for fun, but as a shield to protect herself from the discomfort associated with being turned down. It might suggest a woman displays less confidence and exhibits a lesser degree of maturity. Bryans advises women to adopt a straightforward and genuine approach in their communication.

Consider joining us, perhaps? A woman might confidently propose, "Why don't you come along with me?" Pleasure is guaranteed. The straightforward approach communicates self-assurance and renders the proposition more authentic. Using a basic emoji, like a smiley face, can help a woman keep the conversation casual and playful while staying true to herself. A woman who conveys her true self, without resorting to a shield of humor, exudes confidence and maturity, qualities that attract perceptive men.

Motivate the man to primarily take the lead in beginning the early message exchanges.

By letting the man initiate contact, a woman can gauge his interest without seeming too forward.

Bryans advises that women, especially in the early stages of a budding relationship, should exercise patience and allow the man to initiate the majority of the messaging conversations. This approach fulfills a dual function: it enables a woman to assess how interested a man is without pursuing him, and it ensures that the man does not assume he is owed her attention. Bryans elucidates that a woman's regular initiation of contact might result in a man's diminished interest and a reduced estimation of her worth, as men often value what they have worked to obtain.

Additionally, by giving him ample space, you foster the development of a genuine emotional bond. As a man's pursuit intensifies, confirming his attraction, the allure of a woman similarly grows. Bombarding a man with too many messages can reduce his enthusiasm and instill a feeling of compulsion. Bryans acknowledges that men of a younger generation, accustomed to the prevalent smartphone culture, might expect women to initiate contact more often. Women should modify their strategies by recognizing the common characteristics within the dating landscape.

Men's propensity to start conversations can fluctuate with their age and familiarity with romantic relationships, and there's a tendency for younger men to expect women to initiate the exchange more frequently.

Bryans observes that in the modern age of instant smartphone interactions, it is expected by men in their twenties that women will more frequently initiate text conversations. Men in their thirties and forties, especially those who did not grow up with smartphones, often appreciate women who adopt a less aggressive texting style.

Bryans suggests that while it's generally prudent for women to let men take the lead, this rule can be adaptable when dealing with younger men. Initiating half of the conversations might be acceptable with a twenty-something, but come across as needy to a man in his thirties. In the realm of dating, a woman should consider the man's age and adapt her texts to align with his communication preferences and expectations.

Employ emoticons sparingly when engaging in text messaging.

Overusing emojis can create the perception that a woman is not mature enough, is insecure, or struggles with participating in meaningful conversations.

Bryans suggests that women should employ emojis in their text conversations with careful consideration and restraint. Using too many emojis might lead to misunderstandings or create an unintended perception among men. Overuse may indicate immaturity, feelings of insecurity, or an inability to participate in meaningful conversation. Men are more attracted to women who can clearly express their ideas, demonstrating not only their intelligence but also their emotional sophistication.

Bryans suggests using emojis in moderation, mainly to convey flirtatiousness and to foster a welcoming and playful environment. Distribute your ideas throughout the dialogue instead of concentrating them in a single message. Women should aim for balance by using emojis to enhance their messages gently, rather than letting them dominate the conversation.

Consider the timing of your response without overcomplicating the matter.

A woman should genuinely express her degree of enthusiasm and availability, without adhering to any pre-established periods of delay.

Bryans dismisses the idea that following a specific schedule for replying to a man's texts is advantageous, viewing it as largely ineffective and possibly misleading. Bruce Bryans suggests that women should respond based on their genuine interest and at their convenience. Intentionally postponing your responses to capture a man's interest might result in unforeseen outcomes and increased tension.

Women should focus on four key principles instead of monitoring the progression of time.

1. Treat him like an acquaintance or a close friend. By making sure your attention isn't centered solely on him, you'll prevent the transmission of signals that...

Want to learn the ideas in Texts So Good He Can't Ignore better than ever?

Unlock the full book summary of Texts So Good He Can't Ignore by signing up for Shortform.

Shortform summaries help you learn 10x better by:

  • Being 100% clear and logical: you learn complicated ideas, explained simply
  • Adding original insights and analysis, expanding on the book
  • Interactive exercises: apply the book's ideas to your own life with our educators' guidance.
READ FULL SUMMARY OF TEXTS SO GOOD HE CAN'T IGNORE

Here's a preview of the rest of Shortform's Texts So Good He Can't Ignore summary:

Texts So Good He Can't Ignore Summary Strategies for messaging that sustain and heighten a man's curiosity.

This part of the book emphasizes the art of crafting messages that captivate and maintain a man's attention. Bryans believes that text messages should be composed in a casual and playful way that keeps a man engaged and looking forward to more communication. Women should concentrate on genuine conversations, lighthearted teasing, and engagements that are appropriately timed to keep a man invested in developing a deeper connection.

Respond with enthusiasm when a man begins a conversation.

By participating thoughtfully and showing interest in the dialogue, you can help a man feel appreciated, thereby encouraging him to keep the conversation going.

Bryans encourages women to show genuine enthusiasm when a man initiates a text conversation, as this makes him feel appreciated and reinforces his effort. He advises women to hold back from being the first to reach out, yet emphasizes the importance of being responsive and attentive when he initiates communication. A woman cultivates a connection that motivates a man to keep chasing her by engaging in thought-provoking dialogue, asking relevant questions, sharing her opinions, and using descriptive language.

A man assesses a...

Try Shortform for free

Read full summary of Texts So Good He Can't Ignore

Sign up for free

Texts So Good He Can't Ignore Summary Tactics designed to motivate a man to invite a woman on a date.

This section offers guidance on effective communication strategies that can motivate a man to ask you out. Bryans provides a variety of tactics that subtly motivate a man to reach out first, focusing on playful rivalry or shared interests to inspire him to pursue a face-to-face encounter.

Suggest playfully that his efforts to ask a woman out may need a bit more creativity.

This gentle nudge can motivate a man, who may otherwise hesitate or feel unsure, to come forward and assume a leadership role.

Bryans suggests employing a playful approach that subtly suggests a man should enhance his efforts if he wishes to truly captivate her, thereby motivating him to ask her out. This involves subtly suggesting that reliance on text messaging is excessive and proposing that a bolder approach is needed to garner her interest. Women can gently highlight the peculiarity of a connection that is exclusively maintained through text messages, or they can playfully compare his actions to those of a man who is more proactive in pursuing a romantic relationship.

Sending a message such as "I've never before engaged in flirtation with a man using only text messages" is an example. The...

What Our Readers Say

This is the best summary of How to Win Friends and Influence People I've ever read. The way you explained the ideas and connected them to other books was amazing.
Learn more about our summaries →

Texts So Good He Can't Ignore Summary Strategies for effective communication that captivate a man whose dedication is uncertain or who displays erratic behavior.

This section focuses on navigating the frustrating realm of inconsistent men and those who display flaky behavior. Bruce Bryans offers perceptive advice on managing expectations, responding appropriately to intermittent communications, and setting boundaries to avoid pointless scenarios.

As the relationship develops, it's worth observing that the frequency and manner in which a man communicates via text can change.

A woman should maintain her composure and independence, especially if she observes that her partner's enthusiasm wanes as their relationship evolves.

Bryans suggests that women should not overly analyze how often and in what way a man texts, particularly as their relationship progresses. As a relationship becomes more established, a genuinely interested man may begin to reduce the frequency of his text message communication. This shift does not imply waning interest; instead, it marks the progression into a new phase of interaction. As trust and intimacy develop, men often express their affection through other means beyond constant texting.

Women should maintain their composure and adopt a passive approach instead of dispatching messages that desperately...