1-Page Summary1-Page Book Summary of Best Self
Do you ever feel like there's a gap between who you are and who you aspire to be? Do you often behave in ways that prevent you from living the life you want?
In Best Self, Mike Bayer, life coach and creator of The Cast Foundation, explains that this disconnect occurs when you lose touch with your true self: who you really are at your core. He argues that **reconnecting with your true self—which fosters positive...
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Best Self Summary Part 1: Your True Self Is Your Ideal Self
According to Bayer, being true to yourself is key to becoming the person you aspire to be. He explains that your true self encapsulates your core values and deepest passions, which form the very foundation of your ideal life. By embracing and living in alignment with your true self, you’ll naturally embody the person you want to be and gain the freedom and confidence to pursue what truly fulfills you.
(Shortform note: Research supports Bayer's argument that being true to yourself helps you become your ideal self. According to psychologist Carl Rogers, you perceive yourself negatively when your true self and authentic behavior don’t match your ideal self. This blocks your natural drive toward self-actualization (fulfillment of your full potential). In other words, you must live up to your own expectations or you’ll lack the self-esteem you need to grow. Aligning your behavior with your core values and deepest passions, on the other hand, allows you to naturally progress toward becoming who you want to be.)
What Prevents You From Being True to Yourself?
Why is it often so difficult to live in...
Best Self Summary Part 2: How to Be Your True Self and Live the Life You Want
We’ve just explained how being disconnected from your true self fuels feelings of dissatisfaction and disappointment. Now, we’ll explore how to rediscover and reconnect with your true self—allowing you to break free from unhealthy coping mechanisms and enjoy a more authentic, satisfying life. In this section, we’ll discuss Bayer’s advice as a three-step process:
- Evaluate your life.
- Personify your aligned and misaligned selves.
- Set goals that align with your true self.
Step #1: Evaluate Your Life
The first step toward reconnecting with your true self is to evaluate your satisfaction with different aspects of your life. Bayer explains that you’re likely more true to yourself in some parts of life than in others. You can tell how connected you are to your true self in each area by examining how comfortable you feel in it . Some areas may feel positive and rewarding—these bright spots signal where you’re able to truly be yourself and provide clues about your core values and passions. Other areas may create a sense of discomfort or dissatisfaction—these problem zones indicate that you’re living in a way that doesn’t reflect who you really are.
(Shortform...
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Shortform Exercise: Identify and Set Goals With Your Aligned Self
Bayer suggests that you can reconnect with your true self by following through on goals that reflect your true passions and talents. In this exercise, you’ll learn about and personify your true self and set a goal to align yourself with them.
Evaluate each of the six life areas Bayer discusses: your relationship with yourself, relationships with others, physical health, knowledge and skill development, career, and faith. Write down how comfortable you feel in each area and why.
