Advice for Dealing with Bullies, Big Tech and Social Media | Answer the Call
In this episode of The Jordan B. Peterson Podcast, Peterson and Mikhaila Fuller examine strategies for addressing bullying in children, drawing from research and personal experience. They discuss how individual differences can affect a child's susceptibility to bullying and provide practical approaches for building resilience, including the strategic use of humor and managing emotional reactions.
The conversation spans several additional topics relevant to modern life: the effects of dietary changes on health and weight management, the challenges of raising children in a technology-driven world, and navigating the complexities of modern dating. Peterson and Fuller share specific recommendations for screen time limitations, traditional learning methods, and safe dating practices, while exploring how parents can guide their children through these challenges.
This is a preview of the Shortform summary of the Aug 4, 2025 episode of the The Jordan B. Peterson Podcast
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1-Page Summary
Bullying and Resilience
Jordan Peterson and Mikhaila Fuller discuss how individual differences can make some children more susceptible to bullying, particularly those who are emotionally reactive. They suggest building resilience through specific strategies: Peterson recommends using humor and appearing unaffected by taunts, while Fuller emphasizes that showing no reaction often discourages bullies. Drawing from Dan Olweus's work, Peterson notes that while seeking adult help can affect social standing, it's appropriate when facing significant power imbalances.
Healthy Lifestyle and Dietary Changes
Peterson and Fuller explore the benefits of low-carbohydrate and carnivore diets for addressing health issues. Fuller shares her personal experience with the carnivore diet and her husband's successful 300-pound weight loss through a ketogenic diet. They emphasize making dietary changes a family affair and stress the importance of considering environmental factors rather than blaming individuals for weight gain, particularly noting the prevalence of hyper-palatable, carb-heavy foods in American society.
Technology, Social Media, and Parenting
The discussion turns to the challenges of raising children in a technology-driven world. Peterson emphasizes developing children's ability to pursue delayed gratification and maintain attention spans. Fuller advocates for no screen time before age three and recommends alternatives like the Yoto player for stories and music. Both experts suggest limiting phone use in schools and emphasize traditional learning methods over AI-driven tools to enhance critical thinking skills.
Dating and Relationships for Young Adults
Addressing modern dating challenges, Fuller stresses the importance of understanding children's life goals when providing dating guidance. Peterson advises young adults to be selective in their dating choices and recommends making lists of desired partner qualities. Both experts advocate for safer dating practices, such as alcohol-free coffee dates, and emphasize the importance of clear communication about life goals between potential partners. Peterson particularly warns about individuals with dark tetrad personality traits who typically seek short-term relationships.
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Counterarguments
- While humor can be a useful tool in dealing with bullies, it may not be effective for everyone and could potentially escalate the situation if the bully feels mocked.
- Appearing unaffected by taunts might not always discourage bullies; in some cases, it could lead to an increase in bullying behavior as they attempt to get a reaction.
- Seeking adult help can be beneficial, but it might not always resolve the issue and could sometimes lead to further victimization if not handled properly by the adults involved.
- Low-carbohydrate and carnivore diets may not be suitable for everyone due to individual health conditions, and their long-term effects are not fully understood.
- Emphasizing family involvement in dietary changes is important, but it may not be feasible in all family dynamics or cultural contexts.
- Blaming environmental factors for weight gain does not always account for individual agency and the complex interplay of genetics, lifestyle, and personal choices.
- While limiting screen time for children is generally advised, some research suggests that high-quality, educational screen time can be beneficial for children's development.
- Traditional learning methods are valuable, but AI-driven tools can also enhance learning and critical thinking when used appropriately and in moderation.
- Being overly selective in dating based on a list of qualities might lead to unrealistic expectations and could overlook the potential for personal growth within relationships.
- Alcohol-free coffee dates are a safer practice, but they may not be the preferred choice for all individuals, and responsible alcohol consumption can be part of healthy social interactions for adults.
- Clear communication about life goals is important, but it's also necessary to recognize that goals and desires can change over time within a relationship.
- Awareness of dark tetrad personality traits is useful, but it's also important not to over-pathologize or hastily judge individuals based on limited interactions.
Actionables
- You can practice non-reactive role-playing with a friend to build resilience against bullying by simulating scenarios where you respond to taunts with humor or indifference, thus preparing yourself to handle real-life situations more calmly.
- Role-playing can desensitize you to negative comments and help you develop quick-witted responses or the ability to remain composed. For example, if someone teases you about a mistake, you could laugh it off with a comment like, "Well, everyone has their off days, right?" or simply shrug it off without giving the bully the reaction they're seeking.
- Create a family challenge to cook low-carbohydrate meals together once a week to involve everyone in dietary changes and make it a fun, educational experience.
- This activity not only promotes healthier eating habits but also strengthens family bonds and educates children about nutrition. You could pick a new recipe each week, shop for ingredients together, and then cook as a family. Documenting the process with photos or a shared journal can add to the sense of achievement and track progress.
- Implement a 'tech-free hour' at home where all family members engage in non-digital activities such as board games, reading, or outdoor sports to foster attention span and delayed gratification in children.
- This strategy helps counteract the overstimulation from technology by providing structured time for activities that require more sustained attention and patience. For instance, completing a puzzle together or starting a small garden requires ongoing attention and offers a sense of accomplishment over time, which can be more rewarding than the instant gratification of screen time.
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Bullying and Resilience
Conversations with Mikhaila Fuller and discussions by Jordan Peterson provide insight into the nature of bullying and strategies for fostering resilience in children.
Some Children Face More Bullying Due to Individual Differences
Children all experience bullying to some degree due to their individual differences. Fuller and callers to her show discuss how these peculiarities can sometimes result in more frequent bullying.
Emotionally Reactive Children Are Likelier Targets For Bullies Seeking a Reaction
Bullies often look for an emotional reaction, targeting children who are more likely to display such responses. Both Fuller and Peterson acknowledge that emotionally reactive children are likelier victims of bullies, with Peterson explaining that bullies actively seek a reaction from their targets.
Strategies For Responding To Bullying: Stoicism and Prepared Comebacks Build Resilience
In response to bullying, certain strategies may help build resilience in children, such as stoicism and the use of humor or prepared retorts.
Identify Bullying Tactics; Respond With Humor or Unaffected Act
Peterson recommends identifying bullying tactics and responding with humor or an act of being unaffected. Practicing not being bothered by insults and having responses ready can help a child prevail against bullies. Humor is particularly effective as a defensive strategy, and Fuller points out that appearing unaffected can discourage bullies because they are not interested in bothering someone who shows no reaction to their taunts.
Peterson aligns with Fuller's stance that appearing unfazed is an ...
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Bullying and Resilience
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Counterarguments
- While individual differences can contribute to bullying, it's important to recognize that bullying can also be a result of the bully's own issues, such as insecurity, a need for control, or mimicking behavior seen at home.
- Suggesting that emotionally reactive children are likelier targets oversimplifies the issue and risks blaming the victim; it's crucial to address the behavior of the bullies as the root problem.
- Stoicism and prepared comebacks might not be suitable for all children, as some may struggle with implementing these strategies due to personality or developmental reasons.
- The effectiveness of humor or appearing unaffected can vary greatly depending on the context and the individuals involved; what works for one child may not work for another.
- Encouraging children to handle bu ...
Actionables
- Develop a "cool-down comic" with your child that humorously depicts how to handle bullying situations, which can serve as a private reference for them to mentally rehearse staying calm and using humor. By drawing or writing out scenarios where they face a bully and respond with a joke or shrug it off, they can visualize success and feel more prepared.
- Create a "reaction diary" where your child can record their feelings and reactions after encounters with bullies, helping them to understand and manage their emotional responses. This diary can be a tool for reflection, allowing them to see patterns in their reactions and think about alternative ways to handle similar situations in the futu ...
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Healthy Lifestyle and Dietary Changes
Jordan Peterson and Mikhaila Fuller discuss the benefits of a low-carbohydrate and carnivore diet for addressing obesity and health issues, emphasizing family support and the impact of environmental factors.
Addressing Obesity and Health Issues With a Low-carbohydrate Diet
Low-carb or Carnivore Diets Boost Weight Loss and Health
Jordan Peterson claims that a carnivore diet can rapidly facilitate weight loss, describing the results as "absolutely beyond comprehension." Mikhaila Fuller discusses her own experience with the carnivore diet, linking it to dramatic health improvements. She shares the substantial weight loss achievement of her husband, who lost 300 pounds through a ketogenic medical diet. Mikhaila notes that the diet does not entail starvation but proves to be a legitimate method for health betterment and weight reduction.
Additionally, Mikhaila speaks of her transition to a carnivore diet and its life-changing impact. She recounts previously being on multiple medications for various health issues before making dietary changes. A key example she provides is her husband's successful weight loss journey, which started with a keto diet at 17.
Make Dietary Changes a Family Affair
Both Peterson and Fuller stress the importance of making dietary changes a collective family endeavor. Mikhaila suggests embarking on the diet as a family unit for support and improved chances of success. Jordan Peterson explains that eating is innately a communal activity and that it is crucial to not isolate any family member, including children, in the process.
Focus On Environmental Factors, Not Blaming the Child For Weight Gain
Mikhaila and Peterson highlight that obesity ...
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Healthy Lifestyle and Dietary Changes
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Counterarguments
- While low-carbohydrate and carnivore diets may lead to weight loss for some, they are not suitable for everyone and may not align with the dietary needs or preferences of all individuals.
- Long-term adherence to a carnivore diet lacks substantial research, and there may be potential health risks associated with such restrictive diets, including nutrient deficiencies and increased risk of certain diseases.
- Family support is important, but individual autonomy and personal motivation are also critical factors in successful dietary changes and weight management.
- Dietary changes as a collective family effort can be beneficial, but individual family members may have different nutritional needs and health goals that should be respected.
- While environmental factors play a significant role in obesity, personal choices and behaviors also contribute to weight management, and individuals can take proactive steps to improve their health.
- The role of genetics in craving high carbohydrate and high sugar foods is complex, and environmental and behavioral factors also significantly influence dietary choices.
- Blaming individuals for weight gain may be unproductive, but empowering individuals with education and resources to make healthier choices can be beneficial.
- A balanced diet that inclu ...
Actionables
- You can start a family challenge where each member picks a new vegetable or fruit to incorporate into weekly meals, fostering a collective effort in dietary changes. By turning it into a game, where each week someone else gets to choose the "ingredient of the week," you encourage experimentation and involvement in healthy eating habits. This can be a fun way to discover new foods and recipes that align with a diet focused on natural foods, and it can help mitigate the environmental factors that contribute to obesity by making healthy eating a shared responsibility.
- Create a personal "food mood diary" to track how different foods affect your cravings and mood, which can help you understand your genetic predispositions. By noting down what you eat and how you feel afterwards, both physically and emotionally, you can identify patterns that may be linked to cravings for high carbohydrate and sugar foods. This self-awareness can guide you to make more informed choices about your diet, steering you towards foods that make you feel good and are in line with a low-carbohydrate approach. ...
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Technology, Social Media, and Parenting
Jordan Peterson and Mikhaila Fuller discuss the impacts of short-form content and social media on parenting, weighing in on how technology can complicate fostering depth, purpose, and the development of delayed gratification in children.
Short-Form Content and Social Media Challenge Parents In Fostering Depth, Purpose, and Delayed Gratification in Children
Amid growing concerns about screen time and social media usage, experts suggest ways to help children focus on activities that cultivate attention span and critical thinking.
Limiting Screen Time and Encouraging Sustained Attention Activities for Young Children
Jordan Peterson speaks about the importance of expanding the time frame over which children calculate reward. This can help increase their ability to maintain attention over longer periods and encourage the pursuit of effortful tasks that deliver delayed gratification. He suggests practical steps such as having regular meal times without phones, engaging in meaningful conversations, and reading to children. Listening to stories can improve their ability to articulate thoughts and foster complex understanding. Moreover, involving children in board games can also be beneficial.
Echoing similar sentiments, Mikhaila Fuller underscores the potential negative effects of screens on young, developing brains, advocating for no screen time before the age of three. She recommends using devices like the Yoto player for listening to stories and music, thereby mitigating the hyperstimulation from screens. She also advises on adopting the Montessori method's use of limited toys to prevent overwhelming children, suggesting the rotation of toys to maintain engagement.
Focus On Long-Term Goals Over Social Media Trends
The experts highlight the value of focusing on sustained, attention-demanding activities rather than immediate, fragm ...
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Technology, Social Media, and Parenting
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Counterarguments
- While limiting screen time is important, it's also necessary to recognize that technology can be a tool for learning and development when used appropriately.
- The blanket recommendation of no screen time before the age of three may not consider the potential educational benefits of high-quality, age-appropriate content.
- The Montessori method's use of limited toys might not be the best approach for all children, as some may benefit from a wider variety of toys to stimulate different types of learning and creativity.
- Removing phones from schools could be seen as an avoidance strategy rather than teaching children the necessary skills to manage distractions and use technology responsibly.
- Traditional forms of learning are valuable, but integrating technology can also enhance learning and better prepare children for a future where digital literacy is crucial.
- AI tools, if used correctly, can aid in the development of critical thinking and writing skills, rather than solely detracting from them.
- ...
Actionables
- Create a "Family Challenge" jar where each week, everyone draws a task that involves a non-digital activity, such as building a model from recyclables, writing a short story, or creating a family tree. This encourages creativity and critical thinking without relying on screens and fosters a sense of accomplishment when the task is completed.
- Start a "Tech-Free Tuesday" tradition where the entire family engages in activities like crafting, hiking, or volunteering after dinner. This not only limits screen time but also strengthens family bonds and teaches children the value of community and nature.
- Develop a "Book Adventurer's Passport ...
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Dating and Relationships for Young Adults
The topic of dating and relationships among young adults is discussed, with a focus on the new challenges they face due to evolving norms and the influence of technology.
Young Adults Face New Dating Challenges With Evolving Norms and Technology
A caller named Marilyn from Florida voices concerns about the generation gap, particularly when it comes to offering dating advice to her young adult daughters. She notes how social media and different sexual norms have altered the dating landscape compared to her own experiences, effectively creating a chasm between generations.
Parents Should Discuss Relationship Goals and Partner Strategies With Their Children
Mikhaila Fuller stresses the importance of understanding one's children's life plans—including whether they wish to marry, have children, pursue careers, or be stay-at-home parents. This understanding helps in guiding them towards effective use of technology and in formulating appropriate dating strategies. Similarly, Jordan Peterson suggests talking to daughters about their long-term life desires, even recommending that they make a list of desired qualities in a partner to use as a guide when assessing potential matches.
Encouraging Caution and Selectivity in Young Adults' Dating Choices
Peterson addresses the issue of alcohol and its role in dating, stating that date rape instances would be significantly lower if alcohol weren't involved. He articulates the importance of the ability to say no, calling it a superpower and an indication of status. He also comments on different mating strategies, warning about individuals with dark tetrad personality traits who typically seek short-term sexual gratification. Peterson advises a long-term mating strategy and suggests being selective and cautious with individuals who only show interest in short-term pleasure.
Mikhaila encourages setting coffee dates without alcohol to gain a clearer sense of someone's personality and to facilitate an acceptab ...
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Dating and Relationships for Young Adults
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Counterarguments
- While discussing relationship goals with children is important, young adults also need space to make their own decisions and learn from their experiences. Over-involvement can hinder their personal growth.
- Caution and selectivity are valuable, but there's a risk of becoming overly cautious or judgmental, potentially missing out on meaningful connections with individuals who may not initially meet all criteria.
- Coffee dates are a good suggestion for a safe and alcohol-free environment, but they may not be the preferred or most comfortable setting for all individuals. Some may find that activities or environments where they share common interests provide a better context for getting to know someone.
- Public settings for initial meetings are generally safe, but they can also be impersonal. Some individuals may prefer a more organic way of meeting potential partners, such as through mutual friends or community events, where there's an existing level of trust.
- Emphasizing mutual respect and clear communicati ...
Actionables
- Create a "dating values" vision board to clarify and visualize your relationship goals and desired partner traits. Start by gathering images, quotes, and symbols that represent the qualities you value in a relationship and a partner. Place these on a board or digital canvas. This visual representation can serve as a daily reminder of your standards and help you stay focused on what's important to you in your dating life.
- Develop a personal "dating safety protocol" checklist to ensure you maintain caution and selectivity. Write down steps to take before, during, and after a date that align with your safety and compatibility standards, such as researching a meeting place's environment, sharing your location with a trusted friend, and reflecting on the date's outcomes against your values. This checklist will act as a guide to keep you mindful of your personal safety and the quality of your dating experiences.
- Organize a "values-based speed dating" event with friends or within your community. This ...
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