Chris Williamson: If You Don't Fix This Now, 2026 Is Already Over!

Chris Williamson and Steven Bartlett explore the complexities of personal growth and the mindset necessary to navigate the seas of change throughout one's life. They delve into the nuances of pursuing happiness, facing life's challenges, and embracing change.

Change Is Necessary for Growth

Challenges Catalyze Personal Development

Chris Williamson discusses the natural maturation process, observing his changing perspectives especially when reflecting on his business partner's children. He emphasizes the importance of persistence in facing challenges, noting that being stubborn has led to personal development. Big periods of growth are often the result of one's lowest points, and Williamson encourages leaning into discomfort as if it were an invited transformation.

Avoiding Desires Leads To "Provisional Life" and Unfulfillment

Delaying Happiness Blocks Present Living

Steven Bartlett and Chris Williamson tackle the dangers of delaying gratification and the subsequent sense of unfulfillment. Williamson broaches the notion of the "deferred life hypothesis," whereby people view their current state as a prelude to "real life," perpetually delaying happiness and thus never fully engaging with the present. This cycle of postponement keeps success and satisfaction elusive, with Williamson contending that internal voids cannot be patched with external validation. He articulates the paradox of decision paralysis — when fear of regret leads to inaction and prevents true living. Bartlett acknowledges the draw of materialism in this context, while also sharing his own reflections on not overstaying in unfulfilling situations despite uncertainty.

Both Williamson and Bartlett delve into how diversions like busyness can deter people from tapping into their true desires. They consider how procrastination stems from a fear of discovering one's capacities, which can lead to a failure to thrive. They apply these thoughts to life milestones, with Williamson discussing societal trends like declining birthrates due to delayed childbearing from a position of striving for control, and Bartlett sharing his intent to become a father without necessarily having a strong desire yet, indicative of embracing life's experiences even without complete understanding.

Problems Are a Constant Feature of Life

Railing Against Life's Challenges Leads To More Suffering

Williamson and Bartlett explore the concept that problems are an inherent part of existence a ...

Chris Williamson and Steven Bartlett share practical advice on setting and achieving goals, focusing on the importance of manageable objectives and replacing old habits with new, productive behaviors.

Focus On 1-2 Key Goals, Not a Long List

Chris Williamson advises that trying to do too much will ensure failure, therefore it's critical to pick a small number of changes to focus on. He suggests that it's useful to ask oneself what would make the upcoming year a success to narrow down to a few key things. He also advises that aiming for big picture goals can be challenging, thus focusing on what wants to be achieved over the next year is more practical. Starting with simple, consistent goals, like writing 500 words a week, can demonstrate the effectiveness of concentrating on a single, manageable goal.

Accept Your Limits; Doing Everything Leads To Failure

Steven Bartlett and Chris Williamson discuss setting realistic goals and accepting one's limits. Williamson warns against attempting to address too many goals or everything at once, which leads to failure due to inherent limits. Bartlett emphasizes aiming at foundational habits before trying to change more superficial ones.

Replace Old Habits to Achieve New Goals

Bartlett emphasizes creating both addition and subtraction lists when setting goals to ensure they are achievable within the constraints of time and energy. Williamson suggests assessing current activities to identify what can be eliminated and advises against keeping the phone in the bedroom to decrease unproductive time spent on devices.

Identify and Eliminate Time-Wasting Behaviors For Productivity

Williamson discusses the need to spend less time on activities such as scrolling on his phone to make time for more meaningful activities. Bartlett suggests that life could be significantly improved by getting even 10% better at saying no to things, to identify and eliminate time-wasting commitments.

Use "one Thing" to Focus On Your Most Important Task

Williamson advises asking yourself at the start of every day, "If I could only achieve one thing today, what would that be?" This guides individuals to prioritize the most impactful daily action and avoid procrastination o ...

The dialogue addresses the complexities of navigating personal growth, relationships, social environments, and the quest for partnerships, particularly focusing on the shifts that occur due to change and the impact of influences and models of behavior on our actions and choices.

Prepare For a "Lonely Chapter" as You Grow

Chris Williamson introduces the notion of a "lonely chapter," suggesting personal growth can lead to disconnection with former friendships and habits, a phenomenon echoed by Steven Bartlett. Williamson describes it as a period where one has evolved beyond old friends but has yet to find new ones that align with their current trajectory. This transition can often involve friction and feelings of alienation as friends may not support or keep up with changes like opting out of drinking or spending time differently, leading to potential mockery or temptation from them to fall back on old behaviors. The poignant reality is that such personal development might necessitate leaving behind friends who aren't growing at the same speed, a pattern that could be repeated throughout life.

Not all Friends Keep Up With Your Growth

Williamson acknowledges the discomfort of growth and challenges the listener to consider whether this is a bug or a feature of the process. By using examples such as not drinking or trading video games for gym time, Williamson illustrates that some friends might not support or understand these decisions. This can create a sense of isolation, but it's a necessary part of evolving.

Model the Behavior You Want to Emulate

Williamson and Bartlett delve into the concept of mimetic behavior, suggesting that one should embody the attributes they seek in others. Williamson advises that in order to attract a partner that one desires, they need to become the person that would be attractive to that kind of partner. Bartlett emphasizes the significance of having people around who support and cheer for those taking risks and striving for substantial goals. Both recognize their influence as public figures, understanding that their actions can inspire aspirational behaviors in their audiences.

Surround Yourself With Aspirational People

Bartlett and Williamson contemplate the impact of clapping for others' successes and how this act can have a ripple effect on the community. Bartlett discusses the underdog mentality and the need to be surrounded by people who support ambitious endeavors. They are keenly aware of the power of influence and the responsibility of modeling what it means to be a good person to their listeners.

Recep ...

Chris Williamson and Steven Bartlett emphasize the necessity of introspection and self-awareness to understand one’s emotions, behaviors, and patterns.

Identify Recurring Negative Thought Patterns and Unresolved Emotions

Examine the Thoughts and Feelings That Troubled You This Past Year

Williamson notes that suppressing emotions is not a sign of strength and that such emotions are legitimate and deserve attention. People often find themselves dwelling on the past, fixated on regrets or mourning their losses. Williamson highlights the importance of identifying negative thought patterns or unresolved emotions by examining the thoughts one has thought too often throughout the past year, which have caused harm or distraction, such as issues in personal relationships or feeling undervalued.

He discusses his own discomfort with big emotions and uses his experience of getting teary on stage every night to illustrate the importance of allowing men to express their feelings. He also mentions how quickly one can return to their emotional baseline after an unsettling event, which predicts relationship outcomes. Williamson encourages self-reflection with questions like "What are the emotions I'm unprepared to feel?" and offers his personal realizations about kindness, sensitivity, and resilience as his core traits after everything else was stripped away.

Understand Your Strengths and Weaknesses to Improve

Evaluate Successes and Failures

Williamson's acknowledgment of his past feelings of insufficiency and his search for external validation illuminate the need to understand and address one’s internal conflicts, as external success alone doesn’t rectify internal issues. He also recognizes his past behavior patterns, such as avoiding being present with friends, isolating during tough times, not being truthful, and failing to advocate for his needs or maintain boundaries.

His reflection process includes a review template with questions like "What went well? What went badly? And why?" leading to an examination of successful and unsuccessful actions from the past year.

Embrace Humility, Start Small, Celebrate Victories

Don't Disparage Yourself; Even Tiny Steps Forward Are Meaningful

Williamson and Bartlett explore the concept of "not enoughness" and the narrative that constructs our desire to attain more. They suggest using quiet times, such as the period between Christmas and New Y ...