Podcasts > Good Inside with Dr. Becky > Jordan Chiles: More Than a Moment

Jordan Chiles: More Than a Moment

By Dr. Becky

In this episode of Good Inside with Dr. Becky, Olympic gymnast Jordan Chiles and her parents share their experiences navigating the challenges of elite athletics while maintaining a balanced childhood. The discussion explores how the Chiles family approached Jordan's early gymnastics career, prioritizing enjoyment over competitive success, and how they helped her develop an identity beyond her sport through activities like attending public school and social events.

The episode also delves into the mental challenges Jordan faced during the Tokyo Olympics, including a crisis of confidence that nearly led her to quit the sport. Through her family's support, Jordan learned to distinguish between her athletic persona and personal identity, ultimately finding ways to pursue both her Olympic dreams and other interests, including entertainment and college life.

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Jordan Chiles: More Than a Moment

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Jordan Chiles: More Than a Moment

1-Page Summary

Parental Role In Nurturing Child's Talents and Identity

Jordan Chiles' story demonstrates how parents can effectively nurture their child's talents while maintaining a balanced childhood. Her parents, Gina and Tim Chiles, recognized her excessive energy as an opportunity rather than a problem, channeling it into gymnastics after experimenting with different sports. They prioritized Jordan's enjoyment over competitive success in the early years.

As Jordan advanced in elite gymnastics, the increasing pressure began to dim her initial joy in the sport. Her parents responded by encouraging activities outside of gymnastics, including attending public school and participating in social events like prom. Gina Chiles emphasizes the importance of allowing children to maintain their identity beyond their sport, giving them space to share their athletic experiences on their own terms.

Challenges of Elite Athletes: Navigating Pressure and Setbacks

During the Tokyo 2021 Olympics, Jordan experienced intense self-doubt after falling during the beam event. Despite her previous consistency of hitting 24 out of 24 routines, this setback led her to consider quitting gymnastics at age 19. Her mother, Gina, provided crucial support during this crisis, reminding Jordan of her accomplishments as an Olympian and encouraging her to complete her commitment to the team.

The Chiles family's support proved instrumental in helping Jordan transform her Olympic experience from potential defeat into motivation. When faced with challenges from her coach, including emotional and verbal abuse, her parents helped her refocus on her Olympic dreams while acknowledging and apologizing for not protecting her from negative experiences.

Importance Of Maintaining Identity Beyond Sport or Career

Jordan's journey illustrates the significance of developing an identity beyond athletics. While excelling in gymnastics, she pursued her aspirations in entertainment, eventually joining "Dancing with the Stars" to showcase her creative side. Her college experience further contributed to her personal growth, allowing her to enjoy typical collegiate activities.

Jordan learned to distinguish between her athletic persona and personal identity, which she refers to as "Jordan" versus "Joe." Her family supported this separation by ensuring she maintained a life outside the gym, contributing to her self-confidence and overall happiness.

1-Page Summary

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Actionables

  • You can identify and nurture your child's natural inclinations by observing their play and offering a variety of activities to see what resonates with them. For example, if your child shows an interest in building things, provide them with construction toys or basic materials to create with, and consider enrolling them in a local building or robotics club.
  • Encourage your child to maintain a balanced life by setting aside time each week for non-academic and non-competitive activities they enjoy. This could be as simple as a family game night, exploring a new hobby together, or having regular outings that have nothing to do with their primary interest or sport.
  • Create a "My Identity" scrapbook with your child that highlights various aspects of their life outside of their main interest or sport. Include photos and descriptions of family events, friendships, school achievements, and personal hobbies. This helps reinforce the concept that they are valued for who they are, not just for their performance in a particular area.

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Jordan Chiles: More Than a Moment

Parental Role In Nurturing Child's Talents and Identity

Jordan Chiles’ parents played a significant role in nurturing her talents and identity, balancing her gymnastics career with a sense of normal childhood.

Recognize and Channel Child's Traits, Not Just Problems

Parents Viewed Jordan's Energy As a Sport Opportunity

Jordan's parents, Gina and Tim Chiles, recognized her excessive energy as an opportunity rather than a challenge. Even during a basketball game, Jordan's preference for active cartwheels over sitting still caught the attention of onlookers. Realizing that she needed an outlet for her boundless energy, her parents decided to enroll her in gymnastics, a sport they believed would suit her constant movement, following recommendations from others. Initially, they experimented with track, acknowledging her speed, but gymnastics ultimately captured Jordan's heart.

Without much knowledge about gymnastics within the family, Gina Chiles relied on affirmation from her brother and others to understand Jordan's potential in the sport. Their focus wasn’t on scores in the early days but rather on ensuring Jordan was having fun and learning to focus her energy.

Maintain a Child's Joy and Passion as They Excel In Their Sport

Jordan's Joy For Gymnastics Faded With Elite Pressure

Despite an initial joy and freedom in gymnastics, Jordan felt the joy of the sport fade as the pressure of elite gymnastics intensified. Her dreams required hard work to pursue, and the sport began to take a more serious turn as she grew older. To preserve her joy in the midst of increasing gymnastic demands, Jordan sought out other outlets that maintained her happiness and sense of personal fulfillment.

Parents Should Help Their Child Maintain Identity Beyond Sports

Parents Encouraged Jor ...

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Parental Role In Nurturing Child's Talents and Identity

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Actionables

  • You can observe your child's natural inclinations and explore various activities to find the right fit. For instance, if your child shows an interest in building things, consider enrolling them in a LEGO robotics club instead of insisting on a more traditional sport. This allows them to develop their interests in a structured environment.
  • Create a "joy journal" for your child to record what they love about their activities, and encourage them to note changes in their feelings over time. This can help them and you recognize when an activity becomes a source of stress rather than enjoyment, signaling it might be time to make adjustments or explore new interests.
  • Encourage your child t ...

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Jordan Chiles: More Than a Moment

Challenges of Elite Athletes: Navigating Pressure and Setbacks

Elite athletes, like Jordan Chiles, navigate intense pressure and setbacks. Their journey often includes high expectations, immense support from family, and finding resilience in the face of adversity.

Elite Athletes May Experience Self-Doubt Even At Success Peak

Jordan Devastated by Tokyo Olympic Mistakes, Feels Like "Failure," Considers Quitting

Jordan Chiles, known for her remarkable consistency of hitting 24 out of 24 routines before making the Olympic team, felt devastating self-doubt at the Tokyo 2021 Olympics. After a fall during the beam event, Chiles believes she let everyone down during her first Olympics. The weight of making a mistake on such a significant stage led her to question her place on the team and consider quitting gymnastics altogether. She regretted everything to do with becoming an Olympian, especially because it didn’t happen the way she wanted, which included experiencing emotional and verbal abuse from a coach. She thought about walking away from the sport at the age of 19, amid what she described as a midlife crisis.

Parents' Vital Support in Children's Darkest Times

Gina Chiles played a crucial supportive role at this moment. When Jordan called her, crying, and calling herself a failure, Gina was there to remind her daughter of her tremendous achievement as an Olympian and one of the four gymnasts representing the United States. Gina encouraged Jordan to stay and complete her job for the team, rather than flying her home immediately. When Jordan faced challenges from her coach, Gina reminded her that her path could only change if she allowed it. Discovering the negative impact of the previous coaching, Gina apologized to Jordan for not protecting her. The Chiles family would regularly remind Jordan of her love for gymnastics, distinct from these negative experiences, encouraging her to refocus on her Olympic dreams.

Setbacks Can Foster Growth and Resilience With the Right Mindset

Jordan Turned Her Tokyo Exp ...

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Challenges of Elite Athletes: Navigating Pressure and Setbacks

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Actionables

  • You can create a personal support network by identifying friends or family members who are good listeners and positive thinkers, and intentionally reaching out to them when you're facing challenges. This network can serve as your emotional backbone, similar to how athletes rely on their families during tough times. For example, set up a monthly coffee date or call with these individuals to discuss your goals, setbacks, and progress, ensuring you have a standing support system in place.
  • Develop a resilience journal where you document challenges and setbacks, along with the lessons learned and strategies for overcoming them. This can help you reframe setbacks as opportunities for growth, much like elite athletes do. In your journal, include a section for affirmations and positive feedback you've received, which you can revisit whenever self-doubt creeps in.
  • Engage in a 'role reversal' exercise where you write a letter to ...

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Jordan Chiles: More Than a Moment

Importance Of Maintaining Identity Beyond Sport or Career

The conversation with Jordan Chiles highlights the crucial aspect of recognizing and developing an identity that extends beyond one's professional or athletic persona.

Athletes Can Be So Defined by Their Sport They Lose Sight of Broader Identity and Passions

Jordan Chiles has demonstrated that there’s more to her personality and ambitions than just her career in gymnastics. She had always aspired to be an entertainer, to dance and showcase her creative side, which signifies her understanding of her identity extending beyond the gym.

Jordan Initially Struggled With the Transition, but College and Dwts Opportunities Allowed Her to Explore Her Identity Beyond Gymnastics

While details of her struggle with transition were not discussed in the available content, we know that Jordan has strategically used opportunities to branch out from her gymnastic identity. She took the leap to join "Dancing with the Stars" as a way to showcase her other talents and fulfill her aspirations in entertainment. Her time as a college student also contributed to this growth, as she enjoyed typical collegiate experiences like attending games and spending time at the beach, reinforcing the idea that she is not only defined by her sport.

Encourage Balanced Development, Not Sports Dominance

Jordan Chiles’s inclination to direct her life towards areas outside of gymnastics was encouraged by her family. They ensured that she attended public school, fostering a conventional upbringing that allowed her to experience life beyond her athletic discipline.

Cultivating Self-Worth Beyond Sport or Career Is Key to ...

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Importance Of Maintaining Identity Beyond Sport or Career

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Clarifications

  • Jordan Chiles is an American artistic gymnast known for competing at the elite level, including the Olympics. She has earned medals in national and international competitions, making her a prominent figure in gymnastics. Her significance lies in her athletic achievements and her role as a public figure who advocates for athlete identity beyond sports.
  • "Dwts" stands for "Dancing with the Stars," a popular television dance competition. Celebrities pair with professional dancers to perform choreographed routines. The show combines entertainment with a competitive format judged by experts and audience votes. It offers participants a platform to showcase talents beyond their usual careers.
  • The transition Jordan struggled with refers to moving from identifying primarily as a gymnast to embracing a broader sense of self beyond sports. This often involves redefining personal goals, interests, and social roles outside the athletic world. Athletes may face emotional challenges like loss of purpose or identity confusion during this shift. Support systems and new opportunities help ease this adjustment.
  • Attending public school exposes athletes to a diverse social environment beyond their sport. It offers typical childhood experiences and peer interactions that specialized sports schools may lack. This helps develop a well-rounded identity and social skills. It prevents over-identification with athletic roles by fostering normalcy outside sports.
  • In this context, "Joe" refers to the idea of an average person, often used in the phrase "average Joe." It contrasts with "Jordan," representing her public or athlete persona. The distinction emphasizes separating her everyday self from her professional identity. This helps maintain a balanced sense of self beyond her gymnastics career.
  • Athletes often face pressure to define themselves solely by their sport, which can limit their sense of self beyond competition. Injuries, retirement, or performance declines can trigger identity crises if they lack other passions or roles. The intense public and personal expectations make it hard to separate personal worth from athletic success. Developing interests out ...

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