PDF Summary:The Royals, by Kitty Kelley

Kitty Kelley's The Royals offers an inside look at the evolution of the British royal family through the tumultuous 20th century. Kelley chronicles major monarchy-defining events of the era, from King George V's anglicization of the Windsor name to Queen Elizabeth II's televised coronation and the impact of Princess Diana's unprecedented celebrity on public perceptions.

Kelley examines how changing social attitudes challenged the royals to adapt and embrace more relatable public personas. She explores the controversies, scandals, and personal struggles that shaped the monarchy in modern times—including the abdication of Edward VIII, Princess Margaret's "Royal Rebellions," and the crises surrounding the dysfunctional marriages of Prince Charles and Princess Diana.

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• The Church of England, also known as the Anglican Church, was established in the 16th century by King Henry VIII after separating from the Roman Catholic Church. This separation was partly due to the Pope's refusal to annul Henry's marriage, making the issue of divorce particularly sensitive within the church.
• Sending Townsend to a diplomatic post in Belgium was a strategic move to physically separate the couple, hoping that distance would weaken their relationship and resolve the issue without direct confrontation.
• Margaret's decision to renounce Townsend was seen as a sacrifice for duty, reinforcing the narrative of royal responsibility over personal happiness, which resonated with the public's expectations of royal conduct.
• As a senior royal, Princess Margaret's duties would have included representing the monarchy at official events, supporting charitable causes, and participating in state visits. Her pledge indicated a commitment to these roles over personal desires.

Her Wedding and Divorce With Antony Armstrong-Jones

Kelley recounts how Princess Margaret, five years after publicly renouncing Peter Townsend, married Antony Armstrong-Jones, a non-aristocrat, who was later given the title Earl of Snowdon. She describes the union, which lasted eighteen years, as a disastrous mismatch, with both of them struggling for attention while exhibiting outlandish public behavior and conducting discreet extramarital affairs. Kelley details how their battles over protocol and snobbery soon poisoned the marriage and led to their divorce in 1978, marking the first royal separation since one of Henry VIII's.

Kelley describes Margaret’s marriage to Armstrong-Jones as even more troubling for the royals than Edward VIII and Wallis Simpson, who had been banished after their marriage. The Snowdons were seen as even more threatening among royalty because they were not exiles. Their bad behavior became an international spectacle, constantly putting the monarchy in a negative light in the press. Their public bickering, their drinking and pill-popping, their pursuit of trendy celebrities, their interest in pornography, their outrageous parties, and their blatant extramarital affairs brought criticism and ridicule to the monarchy. Kelley describes their divorce as a devastating blow to the Queen and her mother, particularly the Queen Mother, who had invested her life in upholding the sanctity of marriage.

Context

• After marrying Princess Margaret, Antony Armstrong-Jones was granted the title of Earl of Snowdon. This was a common practice to ensure that a commoner marrying into the royal family received a peerage, thus elevating their social status to match their royal spouse.
• Princess Margaret's previous relationship with Peter Townsend, which ended due to royal disapproval, may have influenced her decision to marry Armstrong-Jones, seeking a partner outside traditional aristocratic circles.
• Armstrong-Jones was a successful photographer and filmmaker, which brought him into contact with many celebrities and influential figures. His career required a public presence, contributing to his desire for attention.
• Henry VIII's marriages, particularly his divorce from Catherine of Aragon, led to the English Reformation. This historical event had profound effects on English society, religion, and governance, illustrating the potential consequences of royal marital issues.
• Unlike Edward VIII and Wallis Simpson, who lived in relative obscurity after their exile, the Snowdons remained in the public eye, maintaining their royal duties and social engagements, which meant their behavior had a more immediate and visible impact on the monarchy's image.
• Princess Margaret was the Queen's younger sister, and their close relationship meant that her personal struggles and public controversies had a direct emotional impact on the Queen and the family as a whole.

Rebellion, Protocol Clashes, Unfavorable Publicity

Kelley characterizes Margaret as a spoiled, self-indulgent royal who delights in her position and expects deference from everyone. She contrasts Margaret's rebellious nature, which earned her a negative image in the press, with the more appealing, approachable quality of her sister. Kelley recounts Margaret's clashes with the media and the many occasions she ignored proper protocol, including her numerous refusals to fulfill her obligations as royalty.

Kelley also cites Margaret’s frequent outbursts, including her caustic comments toward others. She said people couldn't claim she'd fallen behind the Joneses when her family left her out of Queen Elizabeth's wedding. She would not temper her behavior even when challenged by friends and relatives, and in doing so, she made a mockery of the deference that was her due as “a princess of the blood royal." Kelley posits that Margaret's behavior ultimately reflected the changing social and political landscape, which was demanding reform and modernization.

Other Perspectives

• Margaret's actions could be interpreted as a form of asserting her individuality in an environment that often suppresses personal expression.
• The concept of "negative image" is subjective, and what is viewed negatively by some could be seen as refreshingly honest or forthright by others.
• Ignoring protocol might have been a way for Margaret to challenge outdated traditions and contribute to the modernization of the royal institution.
• The frequency of her caustic comments could be exaggerated, with only a few instances being blown out of proportion and overshadowing her more positive interactions.
• Her unwillingness to temper her behavior might reflect a strong sense of self and a commitment to personal values, which can be admirable traits.
• The concept of "deference due to a princess" is culturally and historically specific, and its relevance may diminish in a society that values equality and merit over birthright.
• The demand for reform and modernization might have existed independently of Margaret's actions, and her behavior could be coincidental rather than influential.

How the Unstable Marriage and Divorce of Diana and Charles Affected the Monarchy's Image

Charles's Infidelity With Camilla and Public Disapproval

Kelley describes the impact of Charles’s infidelity on his popularity and the image of Britain's royal family. Despite efforts by the palace to present their marriage as a love match, the public soon learned that Charles had married Diana with great reservations, and he maintained his passion for Camilla Parker Bowles, whom he had dated before his marriage and with whom he resumed an affair during his marriage.

Kelley details how Charles’s public adultery with Mrs. Parker Bowles, who had been married before, damaged his reputation and led to widespread disapproval, particularly during the 1990s when British society was undergoing dramatic social and political changes. With divorce no longer stigmatized, the Prince’s decision to abandon his wife for another man’s wife appeared to violate long-held standards of social and religious propriety. Kelley portrays the public’s disgust at his behavior, which surfaced in tabloid headlines and public opinion polls stating that they did not want an adulterer to become King.

Context

• As the heir to the throne, Charles's behavior raised questions about his suitability to be king. The monarchy relies on public support, and any actions that threaten this can have implications for its future stability.
• Prince Charles and Lady Diana Spencer married in 1981 in a highly publicized royal wedding. The marriage was initially portrayed as a fairy tale, but behind the scenes, there were significant personal and emotional challenges.
• The 1990s were a time of evolving social norms in the UK, with increasing acceptance of divorce and changing attitudes towards marriage and fidelity. However, the royal family was often expected to adhere to more traditional values.
• The 1990s were a time of significant cultural change, with increasing emphasis on transparency and accountability for public figures, making any perceived moral failings more damaging.
• As the future head of the Church of England, the Prince was expected to adhere to its teachings, which historically emphasized the sanctity of marriage and condemned adultery. This added a layer of religious scrutiny to his actions.

Diana's Bulimia, Suicide Attempts, and Royal Struggles

Kelley portrays Diana as an emotionally fragile young woman struggling to adapt to a life for which she was completely unprepared. Charles, who liked spending time with older, more sophisticated, worldly women, was not supportive and soon lost interest in the shy, needy teenager whom he dismissed as obedient. Diana's insecurities were exacerbated by Charles's infidelity, and she eventually developed an eating disorder and attempted suicide on several occasions.

Kelley chronicles Diana's struggles to manage the expectations of royal life, describing her difficulty with public speaking, her discomfort with the courtiers, and her increasing paranoia about her husband's mistress. She felt bullied by the courtiers, who expected her to show up and remain silent. Diana’s bulimia, which was attributed to her unhappiness and the stress of living within the strictures and protocol of palace life, caused her to faint during public events and retreat from her official duties.

Practical Tips

• Volunteer for an organization that supports people going through significant life changes, such as immigrants, refugees, or the newly divorced. By helping others navigate their vulnerabilities, you gain perspective on your own challenges and develop a deeper understanding of emotional resilience.
• Create a "relationship goals" board with a friend or partner, where you both contribute images, quotes, or notes that represent what you aspire to in your relationship. This visual and collaborative approach can keep both parties engaged and invested in maintaining a supportive dynamic.
• Reflect on your personal relationships to identify patterns that may be similar to Diana's experience. Keep a journal where you note any feelings of insecurity and the events that trigger them. This can help you understand the impact of others' actions on your self-esteem and work towards addressing these feelings constructively.
• You can create a personal wellness journal to track your eating habits and emotional health. Start by dedicating a notebook exclusively for this purpose, where you'll log your meals, mood, and any thoughts related to eating or body image each day. This practice can help you identify patterns or triggers associated with unhealthy eating behaviors and provide a space for self-reflection and emotional processing.
• You can enhance your public speaking skills by practicing in a simulated high-pressure environment. Create a mock audience using video calls with friends or family where you deliver speeches on various topics. This will help you get accustomed to the feeling of being watched and judged, similar to what courtiers might do, and will allow you to receive immediate feedback to improve your delivery and content.
• Establish a support network of friends, family, or a professional counselor who you can talk to about experiences of feeling bullied or pressured. Having a reliable support system can provide you with the encouragement and advice needed to navigate difficult situations. You might set up regular check-ins with your support network to discuss any recent challenges and brainstorm solutions together.

Sympathy For Diana, Criticism of Charles and the Queen's Handling

Kelley recounts the sympathy swelling for Diana when aspects of her misery unfolded through the Andrew Morton book and subsequently her BBC Panorama interview. The public, which had been captivated by Diana, saw her as victimized by an uncaring royal family more concerned about preserving the monarchy than the happiness of its members. Kelley describes the criticism aimed at Queen Elizabeth and Prince Philip for failing to sympathize with Diana and their inability to comprehend her psychological distress at her husband’s infidelity.

Kelley argues that Diana, by revealing her torment and acknowledging her struggles with an eating disorder, became a sympathetic personality to millions of people facing similar problems and in doing so she exposed the shortcomings of the aloof royal family of the UK. The contrast between Diana's warmth and emotional nature and the unfeeling Queen and her husband, who seemed incapable of responding to human emotions, caused a great deal of public debate and contributed to the rising tide of resentment toward an aloof monarchy.

Context

• In 1995, Diana gave a candid interview to Martin Bashir on BBC's Panorama, where she openly discussed her mental health struggles, her husband's infidelity, and her feelings of isolation within the royal family. This interview was watched by millions and further increased public empathy for her.
• The late 20th century saw significant cultural shifts towards valuing individual well-being and mental health, which may have influenced public criticism of institutions perceived as outdated or unsympathetic.
• The monarchy's primary focus on preserving its image and stability might have overshadowed individual family members' personal needs, leading to perceptions of insensitivity.
• During the 1990s, public awareness of eating disorders like bulimia was growing, but there was still significant stigma and misunderstanding. Diana's openness helped destigmatize these issues and encouraged more public conversations about mental health.
• The British monarchy has a long history of maintaining a stiff upper lip, a cultural norm that values emotional restraint, which can clash with modern expectations for public figures to be more emotionally expressive.

The Monarchy's Public Image in Britain

Crown Reverence and Royal Deference in Early 20th Century

Kelley recounts how the impact of royal coronations and weddings strengthened the monarchy in Britain in the early twentieth century. These elaborate occasions of pageantry and ceremony gave the public opportunities to celebrate their connection with the Crown. The elaborate spectacles stirred emotions, fostered a public sense of participation in the magnificence of royalty, and distracted people from their own humdrum lives.

Kelley suggests that the crown's influence on public perception was strengthened by the aura of divinity surrounding it, which was viewed as God-given. Those who donned the crown, no matter how imperfect or unprepared in the past, acquired a certain magical status simply by being anointed at Westminster Abbey, and the reverence the public felt toward their sovereigns was reflected in their respect for even the most minor royals.

Impact of Royal Weddings and Coronations on Public Imagery

Kelley details the Queen's orchestration of the events around coronations and weddings, from the number of carriages in the procession to the placement of every jewel on gowns and tiaras, to create a public sense of shared participation that strengthened the monarchy. She emphasizes how crucial such spectacles are for stirring enthusiasm.

Kelley suggests the monarchy successfully used these occasions of pageantry and tradition to solidify its connection to the public, presenting a glorious spectacle that evoked history and its grandest moments of accomplishment for Britain. These royal occasions, carefully crafted from the elements of fairy tale and myth, provided an image of triumphalism designed to reassure Britons that their monarchy, unlike so many others in the world, had weathered the twentieth century and remained a strong and vital global force.

Other Perspectives

• The sense of shared participation might be more reflective of the media's portrayal of these events rather than the genuine feelings of the populace.
• The use of pageantry and tradition could be seen as an outdated mode of engagement in an era where digital media and direct communication are increasingly valued by the public.
• Such occasions may intend to evoke grand moments of accomplishment, but they could also inadvertently remind the public of less favorable aspects of Britain's history, such as colonialism and its associated injustices.
• While events may draw from elements of fairy tale and myth, they could also be seen as reinforcing outdated and undemocratic ideals that do not resonate with modern values of equality and meritocracy.
• The idea that the monarchy remains a strong and vital global force could be challenged by the rise of republicanism and debates about the monarchy's role in former colonies and the Commonwealth.

Queen Mother’s Fame and Connection With Subjects

Kelley attributes the ongoing popularity of the monarchy to the Queen Mother, Elizabeth. Through her efforts in raising two popular daughters and supporting her spouse, King George VI, throughout the traumatic years of the Second World War, she cultivated a perception of the monarchy as caring and compassionate. Kelley recounts how the Queen Mother strengthened this image in later years through her duties as a royal, becoming a beloved national treasure revered by her subjects.

Kelley details Queen Elizabeth's extraordinary talent for public relations, emphasizing her charismatic personality and her ability to connect personally with people. Constantly appearing with her two little daughters in pre-war photographs, she fostered an image of the monarchy as based on family. And as Kelley details, her determination to remain alongside her husband in Buckingham Palace during the Blitz, despite government pleas to seek refuge in Canada, forever sealed the public’s affection for their stoic and enduring queen who had come to symbolize the best values of Britain.

Context

• Her influence extended beyond politics into culture, where she became a symbol of British identity and continuity, especially during times of change and uncertainty.
• The Blitz refers to the sustained bombing campaign carried out by Nazi Germany against the United Kingdom in 1940-1941. The royal family's decision to stay in London during this time was seen as a powerful symbol of resilience.
• Her frequent public appearances and genuine interactions with citizens, including visits to bombed areas and hospitals, demonstrated a hands-on approach that endeared her to the public.
• The Queen Mother understood the power of media and used it to her advantage. By allowing photographs and stories that highlighted her personal interactions, she crafted a relatable and positive image that resonated with the public.
• The British government had advised the royal family to evacuate to a safer location, such as Canada, to ensure their safety and continuity of the monarchy in case of an invasion or severe attack.
• By staying in Buckingham Palace during bombings, she demonstrated courage and leadership, qualities that were highly regarded in Britain, especially during wartime.

Criticism of the Royals and Shifting Views on Privilege

Tabloid Journalism's Rise and Murdoch's Royal Influence

Kelley suggests that the rise of tabloid journalism in Britain eroded the traditional reverence and contributed to the increasingly harsh criticism of the monarchy. She describes how tabloid newspapers, unrestrained by the traditional deference of the establishment press, were intent on selling newspapers with sensational stories that uncovered royal secrets, especially those dealing with sexual indiscretions.

Kelley details the impact of Rupert Murdoch, an Australian media mogul, on public perception of the royals and how his publications, unrestrained by the British penchant for respecting royalty, began churning the waters of discontent with graphic exposures of what had always been concealed. While the establishment press had supported the Queen’s demand for privacy, the tabloids, as Kelley details, revealed her wealth, her sister’s partying, her husband’s supposed love affairs, her daughter’s romances, and her children’s dysfunctional marriages.

Practical Tips

• You can create a personal privacy plan to safeguard your own information from public exposure. Start by auditing your social media accounts and setting strict privacy controls to limit who can see your posts and personal details. Additionally, consider removing or hiding past posts that might reveal too much about your personal life, relationships, or financial status. For example, instead of sharing specific details about a family event, share a general sentiment or lesson learned from the experience.

Other Perspectives

• It could be argued that Murdoch's publications simply cater to a pre-existing public curiosity about the royals rather than actively shaping their perception.
• Some might suggest that the monarchy, as public figures funded by taxpayers, should expect a certain level of scrutiny and accountability, which Murdoch's publications provided.
• The notion of supporting the Queen's privacy could be interpreted differently by various segments of the establishment press, leading to inconsistencies in how privacy is respected across different media outlets.

Increased Scrutiny of Royal Finances and Lavish Lifestyle

Kelley notes that the scrutiny of lavish royal expenditures contributed to the growing resentment against the monarchy. As the press, no longer constrained by traditional deference to the crown, began focusing on the multimillion-dollar cost of maintaining the royals, the public’s support waned. The monarch’s efforts in the 1990s to reduce spending did little to appease her subjects, whose own budgets were squeezed by a national recession and who viewed the royals as living on the government teat while they were out of work.

Kelley details how this resentment toward the perceived extravagance, especially as the twentieth century ended, was expressed in surveys of public opinion. By the 1990s, Britons were no longer willing to fund a lifestyle of multi-million-dollar palaces, horses, and yachts while struggling with poverty and violence in their own lives and watched the benefits that their ancestors had taken for granted eroded. This growing discontent, as Kelley details, gave rise to increased criticism of royal extravagance and fueled efforts to abolish the Civil List.

Other Perspectives

• The coverage by the press could be seen as fulfilling their duty to report on the use of public funds, rather than being a driving force behind changing public opinion.
• The public's expectations for reductions in royal spending might have been unrealistically high, making any actual cuts seem insufficient.
• The royal family's lifestyle is often funded by their own estates and investments, such as the Duchy of Lancaster for the Queen, which are separate from taxpayer money.
• Surveys of public opinion may not accurately reflect the views of the entire population due to potential biases in survey design, sampling, or response rates.
• The royals engage in numerous charitable activities and patronages that directly address issues of poverty and violence, demonstrating their awareness and commitment to these social problems.
• The criticism of royal extravagance may not take into account the revenue generated from the Crown Estate, which is surrendered to the Treasury and benefits public finances.
• The Civil List may actually represent value for money when considering the revenue generated from royal assets and the tourism associated with the monarchy.

Rise of Republican Sentiments and Monarchy Debate

Kelley notes that the shift in public opinion toward the monarchy gave rise to the Republican movement that sought to abolish the monarchy and replace the monarch with an elected president. She details how the public began to challenge the necessity of royalty who seemed not only expensive, but also dysfunctional, and whose behavior did not reflect the standards of morality that they expected of the crowned heads of Britain.

Kelley details the emergence in the late 1990s of Republic, a group committed to abolishing the monarchy in England. Their website summarized their goals: "Advocating for a democratic option instead of inherited authority and advantages in Britain," and they began urging Parliament to abolish all funding. “It’s time for people in the UK to decide through a national referendum how we’re to be governed.” The Queen, ever the pragmatist, saw the shift in public opinion and responded by finally paying her own way (sort of) and removing most of her relatives from the Civil List.

Practical Tips

• Start a book club focused on historical and political themes to foster a deeper understanding of how public opinion evolves. Choose books that cover different periods and political systems, encouraging members to draw parallels with current events. This will not only enhance your knowledge but also provide a platform for observing opinion shifts in real-time.
• Create a virtual simulation game that allows players to navigate the process of changing a government system. Through gameplay, you can learn about the challenges and steps involved in moving from a monarchy to a republic, making the abstract concept more tangible and interactive.
• Start a blog to critically analyze the role of modern institutions in society, using royalty as a case study. By writing regular posts that examine the costs, benefits, and relevance of traditional institutions, you can engage in a public discourse that mirrors the questioning of royalty's necessity. For example, you could compare the public funding of royalty to other government expenditures and discuss the value each brings to society.
• Create a "morality audit" for your actions at the end of each week. This involves reviewing decisions and behaviors to assess how well they align with the ethical standards you've set for yourself. If you find discrepancies, identify steps to better align your actions with your values in the coming week.
• Create a social media campaign that highlights the impact of civic engagement on political systems. Use hashtags, visuals, and stories to showcase how everyday actions can influence governance structures. For instance, you could share infographics about the history of republicanism or democratic movements around the world, encouraging followers to think about their own political systems.
• Engage with local governance by attending town hall meetings or city council sessions. Use these platforms to voice your support for democratic processes in local decision-making, demonstrating a preference for elected representation over positions filled by appointment or lineage.
• Write a letter to your representative expressing your views on government spending, using the knowledge you've gained. Personal correspondence with elected officials can influence policy decisions, and articulating your stance on funding can contribute to the broader conversation on fiscal responsibility.
• You can start a blog to share and discuss governance models, focusing on the pros and cons of referendums versus other decision-making processes. By doing this, you create a platform for informed debate, encouraging others to consider the implications of different governance systems. For example, you might write a post comparing the Swiss direct democracy model with the UK's parliamentary system, highlighting how each affects citizen participation.
• Engage with a financial accountability partner to discuss and plan your financial adjustments. This could be a friend or family member with whom you regularly review your financial goals and progress. For instance, if you decide to cut down on dining out to save money, your accountability partner can help you track your progress and encourage you to cook at home more often.

Princess Diana's Life, Impact, Legacy, and Influence on the Monarchy

Diana's Evolution From "Shy Di" to Icon and How the Media Shaped Her Public Persona

Her Popularity as the "People's Princess" and Her Public Connection

Kelley chronicles how Diana's evolution from "Shy Di" to international icon was in part engineered by the media, who helped shape her image by focusing on her exceptional beauty and charisma, which made her the world's most photographed woman. Her captivating style, coupled with her spontaneous connection to those around her, enabled her to rise above the perceived aloofness of the Windsors and establish a genuine rapport with the public.

Kelley details Diana's talent for connecting to people on a human level, emphasizing her willingness to listen patiently to complaints and acknowledge her own frailties. Kelley contrasts Diana's naturalness with Queen Elizabeth's strained formality, and how that difference won the public’s respect and affection. Diana was viewed as someone with a genuine open heart, who instinctively went beyond the rigid confines of protocol to touch people emotionally. The photographs of her kneeling to talk to crippled children and adults, greeting ailing and terminal patients without gloves, hugging AIDS victims, visiting hospitals at night, became a powerful force for good, which enhanced the public image of the British monarchy and helped propel her into the global phenomenon she became.

Context

• Diana's team, including public relations advisors, played a crucial role in managing her public image. They carefully curated her appearances and engagements to align with her persona as a compassionate and approachable figure.
• Advances in camera technology and the proliferation of paparazzi during this period meant that images of Diana could be captured and disseminated more widely and quickly than ever before.
• Her own experiences with personal challenges, such as her struggles with mental health and her publicized marriage issues, made her more relatable to the public, enhancing her ability to connect on a personal level.
• Her willingness to acknowledge her own frailties was seen as a departure from the traditional royal image, which often emphasized stoicism and emotional reserve.
• Queen Elizabeth II, as the reigning monarch, adhered to long-standing royal traditions and protocols that emphasized formality and distance, reflecting the monarchy's historical role as a symbol of continuity and stability.
• High-profile events, such as her wedding to Prince Charles, were broadcast globally, introducing her to an international audience and contributing to her fame.

Fashion vs. Royal Family's Traditional Formality

Kelley describes how Diana’s fashion choices contrasted sharply with the more formal attire favored by the queen and her mother. Diana was eager to dive into the world of haute couture, which revolutionized royal fashion and established her as a modern trendsetter. Her daring plunge into the world of style, with its emphasis on individuality and glamour instead of the traditional Queenly uniformity, signaled a daring new acceptance for those who did not fit the WASP mold and helped loosen the strictures that had hampered the monarchy.

Kelley explains that the Queen found it annoying when Diana insisted on wearing designer clothes. Although her wardrobe was government-funded, Diana spent millions on her attire, with the tabloids regularly reporting her expenditures while she was married. Those same newspapers also revealed that the Queen objected to the revealing necklines and the high slits in Diana’s gowns. The author recounts how Diana insisted on bringing her Hollywood style and sophisticated fashion sensibilities to the palace, which, as Kelley details, was viewed as a breach of royal protocol and a dramatic shift away from the Queen’s more utilitarian approach, which Diana derided.

Context

• Traditionally, British royal fashion has been characterized by conservative and modest styles, often reflecting the values and expectations of the monarchy. This includes tailored suits, modest hemlines, and a preference for classic over trendy designs.
• Some of Diana's outfits became iconic, such as the "Travolta dress" she wore at the White House in 1985. These pieces are often referenced in fashion retrospectives and exhibitions, highlighting their lasting impact.
• WASP stands for White Anglo-Saxon Protestant, a term often used to describe a social group in the United States that historically held significant power and influence. It implies a certain cultural and social homogeneity, often associated with traditional values and conservative norms.
• Despite the government funding, Diana also had access to personal wealth and private funds, which she could use at her discretion. This allowed her to purchase additional clothing beyond what was covered by official funds.
• Diana's fashion choices were seen as a departure from these norms, as she embraced contemporary fashion trends that were more aligned with celebrity culture than royal tradition.
• Royal protocol is a set of rules and traditions that govern the behavior and appearance of the royal family. Deviating from these norms can be perceived as disrespectful to the institution.

Diana's Humanitarian Work and Commitment to Social Causes

Groundbreaking Work With Aids Patients Challenging Monarchy's Restraint

Kelley portrays Diana as a catalyst for social change, pushing the royal family into embracing causes they previously had been reluctant to support, particularly AIDS. She details Diana's groundbreaking work with AIDS patients during a period when the royals, especially Prince Charles, felt AIDS was "inappropriate" for a Princess. Kelley documents how Diana ignored their objections, and deliberately touched sufferers. Her public embrace of AIDS victims was seen as a compassionate triumph that challenged the monarchy's restraint and forced them to become involved.

Kelley recounts how Diana was the first of the royals to show physical affection to AIDS sufferers, which was praised by Americans and criticized by the British, who were still squeamish about the disease. “They’re trying to claim I’m a husband stealer,” Diana said in response to negative press coverage. "Next, they'll say I have a Catholic Black lover, which I don't." Noting that Queen Elizabeth II and Prince Philip were still using gloves to shake hands with everyone in public, Diana shocked the Queen Mother, her grandmother-in-law, by holding the hand of a dying AIDS patient in a hospital. Reports claimed the Queen felt "deeply concerned" when images of Diana hugging an AIDS sufferer appeared on the front pages of newspapers, but Diana would not back down. She continued visiting AIDS hospices, particularly in the U.S., to which some tabloids responded with “Diana Digs Deeper into Her Husband’s Pockets to Finance Her AIDS Trips.”

Context

• Diana's approach to charity work was more hands-on and personal compared to the more formal and distant style traditionally adopted by the royal family, which often involved attending events and making speeches without direct interaction.
• The difference in reactions can also be attributed to cultural attitudes towards public displays of affection and the role of public figures in social issues, which varied between the UK and the US during that period.
• During the 1980s, there was widespread fear and misinformation about AIDS, with many people believing it could be transmitted through casual contact, which led to significant stigma and discrimination against those affected.
• Traditionally, British royals wore gloves during public engagements as a symbol of status and to maintain hygiene. This practice dates back centuries and was part of the formal attire expected in royal appearances.
• The British royal family traditionally adhered to strict protocols regarding public behavior and interactions. Physical contact with the public, especially with individuals suffering from contagious diseases, was generally avoided to maintain a sense of decorum and safety.
• Diana's involvement with AIDS patients helped reduce stigma and fear surrounding the disease. Her willingness to physically touch and comfort patients was a powerful statement against the prevailing misconceptions of the time.
• During this period, tabloids were known for their sensationalist and often invasive coverage of celebrities and public figures, frequently prioritizing scandalous headlines over factual reporting.

Advocacy for the Marginalized, Breaking With Royal Protocol

Kelley portrays Diana's impact on changing expectations within the monarchy as a result of her willingness to break protocol, embrace touchy causes, and advocate for those on the margin, which elevated the public’s opinion of the monarchy. By aligning herself with society's marginalized, she transformed the perception of the royals from an archaic, self-serving establishment into a contemporary, socially responsible philanthropy. The public, which loved Diana, believed her genuine commitment to social causes reflected the true spirit of British nobility and made the monarchy relevant for the modern world.

Kelley emphasizes Diana’s empathy for society’s victims, those who were deprived of opportunity and struggling with difficult circumstances that she found similar to hers. In my view, it's essential to speak out because no matter who you are, or what you do, everybody gets hurt at some time in their life, and I understand that pain, relate to it, and wish to express my identification with those experiencing suffering. She was especially effective as a communicator, especially with the media, and she knew how to reach her audience when giving speeches, which were sprinkled with such phrases as "I deeply know that feeling," "I get it," "My heart bleeds for you," and " I've been there too."

Practical Tips

• Start a conversation in your social or professional circles about a controversial or neglected issue to challenge the status quo. This mirrors the idea of embracing touchy causes and can lead to increased awareness and action within your community. For instance, if mental health is a taboo topic among your peers, initiate an open dialogue about its importance and share resources for support.
• Share stories of marginalized individuals on social media to elevate their voices. Use your platforms to highlight personal narratives, struggles, and successes of people from underrepresented communities. This can change public perception and create a more inclusive narrative, similar to how a public figure's endorsement can shift societal views.
• Start a small-scale initiative in your community that addresses a specific need, such as a neighborhood recycling program or a community garden. This grassroots approach can have a ripple effect, inspiring others to take action and collectively making a significant impact on local issues.
• Create an empathy challenge group with friends or colleagues where each member commits to one act of kindness or understanding toward someone facing hardship each week. Share your experiences and the impact of your actions in regular meetups. This could be as simple as offering to help an elderly neighbor with groceries or listening to a friend going through a tough time without judgment.

How Diana's Death Affected the Royals' Reputation and Their Family

Global Grief and Criticism of Queen's Silence and Indifference

Kelley describes the impact of Diana's passing on the UK's psyche. After the initial shock faded, the people, incensed at not receiving condolences from the Queen, accused the royals of being insensitive and indifferent to their grief. Her Majesty, seemingly stunned and unable to meet their demands for empathy, at first retreated to her Balmoral estate, which only fueled the media firestorm.

Kelley notes how the Queen’s “cold and hard-hearted” behavior contrasted sharply with Prince Charles, as he flew to Paris to bring Diana’s body back to England. During the five days the Queen remained silent following Diana's passing, she was roundly denounced as "incapable of understanding human emotions" and criticized for treating Diana as simply "a royal discard." The palace released an official statement that the royals were observing a private period of mourning, but the public rejected the rationale. Kelley indicates that the Queen's initial reluctance to respond publicly to her subjects’ grief contributed to the tabloid accusation that the royal family was responsible for Diana's death, and that Charles and his mother rejoiced in their “happy ending.”

Context

• In times of national tragedy, there is often an expectation for leaders to provide visible and empathetic support, which the public felt was lacking from the Queen.
• Princess Diana was immensely popular and beloved by the public, often referred to as the "People's Princess." Her humanitarian work and approachable demeanor endeared her to many, creating a strong emotional connection that heightened public grief and expectations for a royal response.
• The rapid spread of information through television and newspapers meant that public reactions and criticisms were more immediate and widespread, putting additional pressure on the monarchy to respond quickly.
• The public's intense mourning for Diana was unprecedented, and there was an expectation for the royal family to publicly share in this grief, which was not immediately met, leading to further criticism.
• Balmoral Castle is a private residence of the British royal family in Scotland, often associated with personal retreats and family time, which may have seemed inappropriate during a national crisis.
• In the aftermath of Diana's death, various conspiracy theories emerged, some suggesting foul play involving the royal family. These theories, though unfounded, were fueled by public distrust and media speculation.

Royal Family Challenge: Adapt For Genuine Connection With Subjects

Kelley suggests that Diana’s death presented the royals, particularly the monarch, with an enormous challenge not just related to their public image, but also how to appear authentic and genuinely responsive to human behavior. The queen’s decision to permit flying the Union Jack at half-mast was praised as a concession, but people wanted something more from their monarch than symbols.

Kelley details the monarch's struggles to achieve the authentic connection with her subjects that Diana seemed to have achieved so easily, though her stiff formality and dependence on archaic protocol stymied such efforts. Kelley portrays Queen Elizabeth as deeply troubled by the public’s disapproval, citing her statement that she had never before experienced such a bad year. Diana’s death and its impact on the public were seen as the final undoing for a royal family who had not moved with the times and who now looked like wax dummies in a museum—disconnected and irrelevant.

Practical Tips

• Implement a feedback system in your workplace or group that leads to actionable change. After gathering opinions on what could improve the environment or processes, work on implementing at least one of the suggestions. This approach ensures that people feel heard and see their input lead to more than just symbolic acknowledgments.
• You can foster authentic connections by initiating casual conversations in your daily interactions. Start by chatting with people you encounter regularly, like baristas, coworkers, or neighbors, about non-work-related topics. Share a personal anecdote or ask about their day to break down formal barriers and create a more genuine rapport.
• Improve your adaptability to modern times by embracing new technologies in small, manageable steps. Begin by identifying one aspect of your daily routine that could benefit from a technological upgrade, such as using a digital calendar to manage your appointments instead of a paper one. Gradually incorporate more tech solutions as you become comfortable, which will help you stay current and relatable.
• Reflect on your own "annus horribilis" by journaling about challenging times to gain perspective. Write down the events that made a particular year tough for you, how you felt, and what you learned. This can help you process emotions and identify growth opportunities from those experiences.

Diana's Legacy and Its Impact on Expectations for Future Royalty

Kelley suggests Diana's death left a void within the monarchy, particularly in the public’s perception of the heartlessness of the queen, who didn't go to her son's marriage to a divorced woman, though she did go to the wedding ceremonies of two of her grandchildren. She also notes how Diana's enduring legacy continues to elevate people's expectations of what they want and need from future royalty.

Kelley describes how Charles, the heir apparent, is viewed as diminished by the legacy of Diana, who put compassion and love above the privileges of royalty. The author argues that Diana's influence will shape the public’s expectation for future generations of royal spouses, who will be judged by their devotion to philanthropy and their commitment to social change, especially those involving victims and those who are disenfranchised.

Other Perspectives

• The queen's decision not to attend her son's marriage to a divorced woman could be interpreted through the lens of her personal values or religious beliefs, rather than a lack of compassion.
• The impact of Diana's legacy on the monarchy might be overstated, as the institution has a long history and has been influenced by many individuals and events over time, which collectively contribute to shaping public expectations.
• Comparing Charles to Diana may not account for the different historical and social contexts in which they each operated, which can influence the opportunities and methods for demonstrating compassion.
• While philanthropy and social change are admirable pursuits, it is possible that the public may also value other qualities in royal spouses, such as their ability to uphold traditions, represent their country internationally, and provide a sense of continuity and stability.