PDF Summary:The Art of the Interesting, by Lorraine Besser

You’ve likely heard that being happy and finding meaning are key to living a good life. But what if you regularly have happy and meaningful moments and still feel like something’s missing—does it mean you need to chase even more of these experiences?

According to philosophy professor Lorraine Besser, that chase might backfire. In The Art of the Interesting, she argues that pursuing only happy and meaningful experiences blinds you to what’s interesting in your life. She explains that when things stop capturing your interest, even experiences you expect to be satisfying can feel mundane. So, to find fulfillment, you need all three ingredients: happiness, meaning, and interest.

This guide explains what interesting experiences are, why they’re key to living a good life, and how you can cultivate a more interesting—and therefore, fulfilling—life. We’ll also expand on Besser’s ideas with research and practical advice from psychologists, neuroscientists, and self-help authors.

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Anyone who regularly reads self-help literature has likely been conditioned to believe that the only way to be successful and happy is to set and relentlessly pursue meaningful goals. It’s no wonder then that they might willingly miss out on simple pleasures and end up resenting anything that stands in the way of their pursuit, no matter how valuable it might be.

Why You Need Interesting Experiences Too

Though happiness and meaning help make life feel worthwhile, it’s clear that prioritizing them often works against you. Besser says this is because they both depend on achieving outcomes you can’t fully control (how your brain triggers pleasurable rewards) or predict (how fulfilled you’ll feel after achieving a goal). But even worse, pursuing these experiences at the expense of all others can leave you with the nagging feeling that you’re missing out on something.

(Shortform note: Byron Katie (Loving What Is) takes Besser’s explanation a step further, suggesting that the cause of dissatisfaction isn’t that you can’t control outcomes, but that you try to control them in the first place. She explains that every experience is inherently good—so you never have any real reasons to feel bad. However, when you judge experiences as wrong or unwanted, you prevent yourself from seeing the good in them—and this is what causes you to feel uncomfortable emotions or feel you’re missing something. To escape this discomfort, you attempt to exert control over and change things you can’t control. But this only prevents you from accepting and making the best of your experiences, triggering even more judgmental thoughts and discomfort.)

Besser suggests that the dissatisfaction you feel when you focus on happiness and meaning is due to missing out on something that’s just as necessary for living a good life: interesting experiences (those that engage your mind, challenge you, surprise you, or shift your perspective). She argues that interesting experiences benefit you in three ways: They ward off apathy, are always available to you, and prevent both boredom and mental fatigue.

Benefit 1) Interesting Experiences Ward Off Apathy

Besser explains that interesting experiences expand your mind by stimulating new thoughts, emotions, questions, and perspectives. This mental stimulation encourages you to notice things you’d otherwise miss and to think and feel differently about everyday experiences. This, in turn, prevents you from getting stuck in an apathetic mindset that makes life feel repetitive and dull.

(Shortform note: Psychologists clarify what apathy is and why it’s worth preventing: Apathy is a state of emotional indifference that prevents you from being actively involved in your life. You feel detached from your experiences, like you’re on the outside looking in, and this can make you feel as if you have no power to influence what happens. This sense of powerlessness triggers even more feelings of apathy—because when you believe your input makes no difference, you don’t see the point in caring about or investing effort in anything. As a result, you withdraw even further from your life, stop trying to improve things, and limit your chances of encountering anything worth engaging in.)

Benefit 2) Interesting Experiences Are Always Available to You

Besser says that what makes an experience interesting isn’t the experience itself, but the way you think or feel about it. This means that, unlike other sources of fulfillment, interesting experiences are always within reach, regardless of how happy you feel or whether you’ve found meaning.

Since you only need to engage your mind to stimulate your thoughts and emotions, you don’t need to do anything dramatic, achieve something, or wait for the perfect conditions to feel interest. You just need to change how you relate to whatever’s already in front of you—which means you can drum up as much interest sitting alone in your room as you can exploring the other side of the world.

(Shortform note: Steven Kotler (The Art of Impossible) adds that the more you practice mental engagement, the easier you’ll find it to attain this state of mind regardless of what you’re doing. This is because being fully engaged employs six of the most addictive reward neurochemicals at once—making it an addictive mental state. Kotler suggests that you can kickstart this pleasurable addiction by spending two to six hours each week pursuing recreational activities that fully engage you.)

Benefit 3) Interesting Experiences Prevent Boredom and Mental Fatigue

Interesting experiences support your pursuit of happiness and meaning by providing opportunities to focus on what’s in front of you, making your experiences feel richer and fuller. Besser explains that the pursuit of pleasure often encourages you to take a passive stance toward what you experience. As a result, you don’t actively engage with what’s in front of you and end up bored. Interesting experiences prevent this by pulling your attention toward something that forces your mind back into action.

For example, when pursuing pleasure, you might replay an enjoyable movie, hoping you can just sit back and let it make you feel good. But because you already know the plot, you don’t feel like you need to watch it attentively. So you let your focus flit between the movie and your phone. Before you know it, the movie’s over and you don’t feel any happier than you were when you started it.

In contrast, your pursuit of interest might lead you to replay the same movie. But instead of taking the plot for granted, you focus on what’s happening and notice details you missed the first time around. Because you’re actively engaging with it, you feel more absorbed and emotionally invested, which makes the experience feel more satisfying.

(Shortform note: Maria Konnikova (Mastermind) explains that you’re more likely to experience boredom during activities (regardless of how pleasurable you expect them to be) when operating in autopilot mode. Designed to save mental energy, this mode causes you to passively process information based on what immediately grabs your interest. As a result, your attention automatically jumps from one appealing stimulus to the next, preventing the sustained focus necessary for active engagement.)

Meanwhile, Besser says that the pursuit of meaning often compels you to focus intensely on your goals. This strains your mind and leaves you too mentally exhausted to keep at it for long periods. By shifting your attention to something interesting, you give your mind a chance to refresh, which enables you to refocus on what you’ve set out to do.

(Shortform note: Research into ultradian rhythms clarifies how shifting attention away from goals enables you to refocus. When your mind’s busy on a task, your brain and body burn sources of energy such as oxygen and glucose. This process creates metabolic waste that accumulates in your system and leads to feelings of fatigue, stress, and irritability—impeding your ability to focus. Taking regular breaks to let your mind wander allows your body to flush this waste out of your system, restore your energy sources, process what you’ve been working on, and revive your focus.)

Part 2: How to Make Life More Interesting

Now that you know why interesting experiences are valuable, you might be tempted to add “experience interest” to your list of goals to achieve. Besser warns against this approach, explaining that interest is a feeling that you can’t schedule: There’s no way to decide in advance when you’ll experience interest or what will trigger it. This is because interesting experiences are rarely the ones you look for or intend to find. They’re the unexpected things you notice, the tangents you follow, the moments that catch you off guard. If you try to force the feeling, you’ll end up putting pressure on yourself to find things stimulating, which will only make you more aware of when they’re not, intensifying your feelings of boredom.

Your Temperament May Reveal Your Interests

It’s true that there’s no manual for ensuring you experience interest when you’d like to. This is partly because interest is personal and subjective: We all have unique values and temperaments that influence how we respond to experiences—so something that inspires interest in one person won’t necessarily elicit the same response in another. However, knowing your temperament—your inherent way of interacting with your environment%2C%20508%2D521.-,Types%20of%20Temperament,-Over%20decades%20researchers)—may provide clues on what types of experiences stimulate you. Scientists classify temperaments into four types, each drawn to different types of experiences:

• Sanguine (sociable and creative): spontaneous conversations, group activities, and lively or novel environments

• Melancholic (detail-oriented and purpose-driven): researching or analyzing ideas and reflecting on meaning

• Choleric (goal-focused and ambitious): tackling challenges and optimizing tasks and systems

• Phlegmatic (people-oriented and relaxed): meaningful interactions, unstructured activities, and calm settings

While you can’t force interest, this doesn’t mean you can’t increase your odds of experiencing interest. Besser suggests you can open your mind to sources of stimulation by practicing five methods: Explore your inner world, observe your environment, ask questions, shake up your routine, and spend time with diverse people.

Method 1) Explore Your Inner World

The first method Besser recommends is to approach activities without predetermining specific outcomes. Instead, just do them and pay attention to whatever thoughts arise. For example, go for a walk without a destination in mind. Or, if you usually read books to extract information, try reading without trying to retain anything specific. Notice which passages spark questions, memories, or emotional reactions, and allow yourself to follow those lines of thought wherever they lead. This idle, goal-free time will liberate your mind from the constraints that prevent it from engaging fully (for example, your to-do list).

(Shortform note: If you’re prone to busyness, the thought of spending time on activities that don’t achieve anything specific might trigger some discomfort. Clear (Atomic Habits) provides practical advice that can make goal-free time feel less daunting: Use the two-minute rule. Commit to the first two minutes to get the ball rolling (for example, aimlessly wander for two minutes). After that, continue breaking down your session into two-minute increments.)

Schedule Alone Time

Besser suggests that you can learn to become comfortable with free time by scheduling regular time alone. During these sessions, resist the urge to reach for tasks, distractions, or entertainment. Instead, tune into your thoughts and emotions and see where they go, letting your mind wander without judging what it comes up with. By doing so, you’ll give your mind free rein to explore everything within—such as unanswered questions, abandoned ideas, and distant memories. This freedom enables your mind to process and form associations between these fragments of thought, so you can generate new insights and emotional reactions that naturally give rise to interest.

(Shortform note: The authors of Wired to Create explain why allowing your mind to wander freely generates insights: It activates brain networks associated with creativity. When you focus on something external, the high-focus network of your brain suppresses your imagination, directing your attention to your environment rather than your thoughts. However, when you focus internally, your high-focus network works with your imagination, heightening your ability to connect ideas and develop insights.)

Method 2) Observe Your Environment

You can also inspire interest by pausing to notice details around you. Besser explains that your brain quickly processes everything in your environment, filtering details according to how relevant they are to your immediate needs. While this filtering process helps you avoid distractions and get things done efficiently, it causes you to focus only on what you want or expect to see—and to treat everything else as background noise.

Filtering Helps Focus Your Attention

John Medina (Brain Rules) expands on why and how your brain filters information: He explains that, at any given time, there are millions of sensory neurons carrying messages to your brain, each competing for your attention. Your brain needs to filter this information—otherwise, so many things would be competing for your attention that it’d be difficult to focus on any one.

While Besser says that your immediate needs determine what your brain filters, Medina suggests that stimuli in your environment influence this decision. He explains that the filtering process is controlled by three neural networks, which are activated consecutively:

• The first is the alerting network. This detects notable stimuli and initiates the filtering process. For example, if you’re scrolling online and come across a list of book titles, your alerting network will register its presence.

• The second part is the orienting network. This processes information about the stimulus, helping to determine which details are relevant. For example, if you’re thinking about changing your habits, you might focus only on words like “habit” or “change,” while filtering out the rest of the other titles.

• The third part is the executive network. This dictates how you respond to the stimulus. For example, because you spotted a title with the words you were looking for, you might then click on it to learn more.

By deliberately forcing yourself to pay conscious attention to your surroundings, Besser says you’ll perceive details you’d normally ignore and give your mind more material to engage with. For example, if you tend to block other people out during your morning commute, you might try observing them or tuning into snippets of conversation to stimulate interest.

(Shortform note: As you pay attention, bring all of your senses into play to observe your surroundings. In Brain Rules, Medina explains that engaging multiple senses heightens your ability to perceive more nuances and details in your environment, This is because engaging one sense automatically activates and heightens other senses. For example, when you listen to someone, you might also become more aware of their facial expressions, energy level, or mood.)

Method 3) Ask Questions

You can sustain your interest in the details you notice by asking questions about them. Alongside filtering your perceptions, your brain also categorizes everything it encounters to help you quickly interpret and form conclusions about what’s going on around you. This process helps you navigate daily life efficiently, but it also encourages you to assume you already know all you need to know. The problem, Besser explains, is that once you assume you’ve fully figured something out, your mind gets the message that there’s nothing left to explore, so it stops engaging.

(Shortform note: Another problem with your brain’s filtering process is that it often causes you to form inaccurate conclusions. In Mastermind, Konnikova explains that, during this categorization process, your brain quickly makes sense of new information by drawing parallels with your past experiences or existing knowledge. As a result, you form conclusions that feel comfortable and reassuring due to their familiarity, rather than conclusions that are factually sound.)

Besser says you can keep your mind engaged by resisting the urge to accept your initial assumption about anything that captures your attention. Instead, entertain the idea that there might be multiple ways to interpret it and ask questions to encourage this exploration. The point isn’t to find an answer, but to open your mind to new ways of thinking about topics it previously filed away as well-understood.

(Shortform note: If you’re stuck on what questions you should ask to kickstart your exploration, you might try asking something like, “What types of questions will help me think about this differently?” This will help you come up with ideas by triggering a brain reflex known as instinctive elaboration: When you pose a question, you tell your brain that there’s a gap in your understanding. In response, your brain feels compelled to fill this void with an answer, and initiates the process to find solutions.)

Method 4) Shake Up Your Routine

Another reliable way to inspire interest is to introduce variety into your routine. Besser explains that doing things the same way all the time trains your brain to take care of your daily activities automatically—you go through the motions without actually thinking about them. As a result, your mind becomes so familiar with your behaviors and the situations you encounter that it switches off and stops paying attention.

(Shortform note: While many authors agree that your brain automatically handles your daily behaviors, their opinions differ on how much of your routine you perform without thought. Charles Duhigg (The Power of Habit) asserts that you engage in more than 40% of your daily behaviors on autopilot, James Clear (Atomic Habits) argues that the figure exceeds 50%, while developmental biologist Bruce Lipton (The Biology of Belief) suggests it may be as high as 95%. Though the numbers may differ, it’s clear that you engage in many of your daily behaviors without thinking about them.)

When you deviate from your routine—for example, by taking a different route home—you force your mind to switch on and engage. Besser explains that even minor changes introduce novelties that your brain must actively process—and each new thing provides an opportunity for mental stimulation.

(Shortform note: Neurological research clarifies how novel behaviors force your mind to engage. Your brain relies on predictive processing, a mechanism that continuously generates expectations about what will happen next based on repeated experiences in the same context. When you habitually perform the same behaviors in the same context, predictive processing learns your patterns, enabling your brain to easily recognize and manage your routine behaviors. But when you change either your behavior or the context in which you perform that behavior, predictive processing receives information that conflicts with what it’s learned about you. So, it can’t figure out what you’ll do next, and this forces your mind out of autopilot mode.)

If you don’t feel comfortable disrupting your routine, Besser recommends other ways to introduce novelty and spark interest—for example, by reading genres you wouldn’t normally consider or watching documentaries about new topics. (Shortform note: While disrupting your routine may sound like an uncomfortable process, you might enjoy it. According to Steven Kotler (The Art of Impossible), doing activities that are outside of your comfort zone triggers dopamine spikes. This means that you’ll experience pleasure each time you shake up your routine. Introducing novelty in other ways, outside of your usual routines, may spike dopamine in a similar way)

Be Open to Challenges and Detours

Besser adds that unwanted or unexpected circumstances can prompt your mind to engage just as effectively as any change you might deliberately introduce—but only if you let them. She explains that it’s normal to resist things that get in the way of what you want, expect, or plan to happen. You likely think of them as obstacles that you must overcome to get back on course. But the problem with resistance is that it causes you to focus only on what you’re not experiencing and why you’re not experiencing it. As a result, you don’t pay attention to what’s actually happening, and this prevents your mind from finding anything stimulating about the situation.

(Shortform note: Why is it normal to resist things that get in your way? Neil Pasricha (The Happiness Equation) explains that it’s a result of evolution: To ensure survival, your ancestors had to constantly stay alert to danger. Letting their guard down made them vulnerable to predators and competitors. Though you don’t face the same risks now, your instinct to avoid danger hasn’t evolved. However, instead of protecting you from threats to your survival, this instinct now encourages you to focus on “threats” such as what you don’t have and what needs to improve.)

Therefore, Besser advises, when something doesn’t play out the way you intend, don’t immediately think of it as a problem you need to overcome. Instead, consider whether there’s anything about the situation that’s worth exploring. It may have the potential to prompt thoughts, ideas, or possibilities that you wouldn’t have come up with had things gone your way.

(Shortform note: One way to adopt a more open mind toward unwanted or unexpected circumstances is to consider how you’d advise someone else if they were in your position. By pretending that you’re not personally involved, you’ll find it easier to let go of your negative judgments and emotions. This will ease your resistance and enable you to come up with ideas for making the best of the situation.)

Method 5) Spend Time With Diverse People

Up until now, we’ve discussed methods you can do on your own to inspire interest. Besser adds that interacting with people who have different experiences from yours is a surefire way to add variety to your life and stimulate interest. They expose you to different perspectives and behaviors that—if you let them—disrupt your habitual thinking patterns. This can lead you to question your beliefs and opinions, notice and appreciate things you’d normally ignore, or feel inspired to try new activities that stretch your comfort zone.

(Shortform note: You might need to look outside of your existing social groups to expose yourself to different perspectives. Research suggests that your inherent need for social connection compels you to only spend time with people who are similar to you—because the feeling of sameness enhances your sense of belonging. However, this innate preference for people who are like you can cause you to (unconsciously) negatively judge and exclude people who aren’t like you—because you don’t feel connected to them. As a result, you stay stuck in a social bubble that prevents you from learning about alternative perspectives and experiences that don’t closely mirror yours.)

In addition to stimulating new thoughts and ideas, other people also amplify your emotions, prolonging your interest in things that capture your attention. This is because shared emotions tend to feel stronger and last longer than emotions that are felt alone. Besser explains that it’s easy to downplay or dismiss the emotions you feel when you’re on your own. For example, if you’re alone and see something funny, you might smile or chuckle briefly before putting it out of your mind.

However, when you’re with others who feel and express what you’re feeling, your reactions feed each other. As a result, your emotions build, causing you to stay engaged with whatever triggered them for longer. For example, if you’re with a friend and see that same funny thing, your chuckle makes them giggle, which makes you laugh out loud, and so on. The more this goes on, the more you think about what set it off, milking that initial experience for every detail you can.

(Shortform note: Shawn Achor (The Happiness Advantage) clarifies how shared emotions feed and amplify each other: Your brain has mirror neurons that mimic and reflect the sensations of people around you—for example, if you see someone in pain, these neurons cause you to feel and reflect their pain. And since everyone else has mirror neurons too, when you reflect an emotion back, it leads the other person to mimic and dwell on their original emotion. This causes them to feel and display the emotion more intensely—so you reflect back that stronger emotion, and the ripple effect goes on.)

Besser suggests you can create opportunities for these types of stimulating experiences by organizing shared activities that require active focus from all participants—for example, games, friendly debates, or collaborative tasks.

How to Organize Social Activities

In The Art of Gathering, Priya Parker outlines five steps to ensure any social activities you organize live up to your expectations.

• Identify the reason for the activity and use it as a guideline for decision-making.

• Curate your guest list to include only those who support the purpose of the activity.

• Select an appropriate venue that enhances the guest experience and encourages desired behavior.

• Create directives or rules for behavior during the event to make diverse gatherings more comfortable and encourage engagement.

• Set clear expectations with guests before the activity to help them get into the right mood and prevent disappointment.

Making sure everyone’s on the same page ahead of time will help you feel more relaxed and receptive to opportunities for engagement during the activity.