PDF Summary:Quantum Accountability, by Kevin Kremer and Kelley Kremer

Many people feel stuck and unfulfilled—like victims of uncontrollable circumstances. In Quantum Accountability, Kelley and Kevin Kremer explain that these feelings come from negative mindsets that allow you to avoid accountability. Your mindset—shaped by your thoughts, feelings, beliefs, virtues, and attitudes—influences your perceptions, actions, and ultimately, your circumstances. These elements of your mindset act as unseen (or quantum) forces that shape your life. Therefore, the authors argue that to create the life you want, you must take responsibility for these invisible forces. Doing so lets you build a positive mindset, take meaningful action, foster positive relationships, and pursue your purpose.

This guide will explain what quantum accountability is, how it’s linked to your mindset and reality, and how it can create a positive mental and physical world that enables you to flourish. We’ll also supplement the authors’ advice with input from other sources on success and accountability like Awaken the Giant Within by Tony Robbins and First Things First by Stephen R. Covey.

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To change your mental-emotional-physiological states, Robbins recommends not only practicing gratitude (as recommended by the Kremers), but also practicing body language that makes you feel happy, powerful, and strong, such as standing up straight and breathing deeply. To start practicing positive body language, spend one minute smiling at yourself in the mirror five times a day for one week—this will make happiness easier to access in your day-to-day life.

Part 3: Take Accountability for Your Actions and Decisions

According to the authors, once you’ve taken accountability for your mental world—your thoughts, beliefs, feelings, virtues, and attitudes—you can take meaningful action in the physical world. In this section, we’ll discuss how you can take accountability for six areas of action: your decisions, roles, time management, focus, finances, and energy management.

Take Accountability for Your Decisions

The authors explain that your attitudes and feelings largely impact how you make decisions, so making effective decisions requires you to take full accountability of these mental attributes. Conversely, if you’re not accountable and thus allow negative thoughts and feelings, you’ll make bad decisions.

The authors offer a few guidelines to ensure your decisions are based on productive attitudes and feelings. First, determine whether you should make a decision alone, with the help of your support system, or with the help of experts—don’t over-estimate your abilities, expertise, or the weight of the decision. Second, spend the right amount of time making the decision. Usually, it’s better to act swiftly rather than to dwell on an issue; however, some issues will require you to research and reflect rather than acting on your instincts (or feelings).

Making Effective Decisions

In Thinking in Bets, Annie Duke argues that beliefs, rather than attitudes and feelings, have the biggest sway on our decisions. However, she agrees with the Kremers that attitudes and feelings are both shaped by beliefs.

Duke also recommends making certain decisions with the help of others and suggests forming a “decision pod” of people who volunteer to help. This is effective because these people genuinely want to offer their experience to help you see your blind spots and make effective decisions—they’re not pressured into doing so. Lastly, she says you can evaluate your decisions and avoid making impulsive, emotion-driven ones by “time-traveling”—taking a broader view of your life and considering which decision will have a positive long-term effect, whether bringing up an issue is really worth it, and so on. This will help you put your current feelings into perspective.

Take Accountability for Your Roles

People play numerous roles in their personal, professional, and social lives—parent, spouse, friend, business owner, and so on. The authors explain that these roles can bring great fulfillment when you’re mentally accountable and actively choose them. On the other hand, if you lack mental accountability, external pressures often push you into undesired roles that leave you feeling unhappy and stuck. These feelings then make you want to escape responsibility for those roles, leading to destructive behaviors.

Therefore, the authors explain that you must actively choose, manage, and draw boundaries between your roles—ensure you’re prioritizing the right things and spending your time and energy where it’s most beneficial. For example, if you get offered a promotion but feel more fulfilled in your current position, tell your boss you want to stay. You should also create boundaries between your roles to give each one proper attention—don’t let your professional role take time away from your parental role; when the work day concludes, put your laptop away. Finally, communicate your boundaries with the people around you so they understand your priorities and obligations.

Managing Roles Productively

In First Things First, Stephen R. Covey also addresses the importance of roles in bringing fulfillment or dissatisfaction; however, his ideas on how to manage roles differ slightly from the Kremers’. Covey emphasizes that people are most unhappy in their roles when they feel like one takes time away from others—not when they’re stuck in undesired roles.

Also, whereas the Kremers argue that creating boundaries between roles is the key to fulfillment, Covey argues that doing so is impossible. For example, you’re still a parent even when you’re actively in your business-owner role—beleiving you can only be one or the other at a given time contributes to a mindset of scarcity rather than abundance. Instead of creating boundaries between roles, Covey recommends balancing your roles by considering how they might overlap and connect to each other.

Finally, while Covey doesn’t specifically recommend dropping roles, he does offer specific advice for offloading obligations that don’t align with your goals. This advice can help you determine which roles to let go of, as the Kremers recommend. We’ll discuss this advice in the next section.

Take Accountability for Your Time

Next, the authors explain that how you spend your time should be guided by what you believe is most important, and that you should perceive time in a healthy way—percieving time as infinite leads to procrastination and prevents you from reaching your potential.

To manage your time, the authors recommend planning out how you’ll spend it. First, designate time for the most important things—like relationships, health, and life goals. Once you’ve allotted time for these things, you can then allot time to secondary priorities like your career and hobbies. With your remaining time, you can accomplish lesser tasks and chores. Be sure to include breaks to prevent overload. Dividing your time in advance will not only help you be more productive, but will reduce the stress of deciding what to do in the moment.

Covey’s Time Management Model

In First Things First, Covey offers a method to help you manage your time and energy: Rank tasks and obligations according to their importance and urgency. Important and urgent matters will be in zone 1, important and non-urgent matters will be in zone 2, urgent but unimportant matters will be in zone 3, and unimportant and non-urgent matters will be in zone 4.

Covey says that zone 1 matters are the things you should prioritize first and dedicate the most time and energy to. These tasks are crucial for helping you get where you need to be in life, and they need to be handled quickly. Zone 2 matters are things you should regularly include in your schedule to keep them from becoming urgent. For example, your work presentation next quarter is important but not urgent, so if you spend a little time each day working on it, you won’t have to cram at the last minute.

While Covey doesn’t specifically recommend what to do about zone 3 matters, Dwight D. Eisenhower’s matrix (which Covey’s is based on) recommends offloading these matters by delegating as much of them as you can to other people. For example, hire someone to clean your house to free up more time for zone 1 and 2 matters. Finally, Covey says to simply drop matters in zone 4—these just slow your progress on zones 1 and 2.

Take Accountability for Your Attention

The authors explain that there’s a cyclical relationship between attention and mindset—the strength of one impacts the strength of the other. When you’re accountable for your mental state, you can better control your attention. When you better control your attention, you better control what enters your mind, which shapes your thoughts, beliefs, feelings, virtues, and attitudes. Thus, better attention control can lead to a more positive mindset, which in turn gives you better attention control. For example, by blocking out unreliable media sources that spread misinformation and drama, you can protect your mental qualities, which will in turn let you pay attention to other, more positive, things.

According to the authors, controlling your attention is also important because it allows you to reach flow—a state of intense focus and productivity which is the key to achieving your potential. To reach flow, clear a time and space for your work, limit distractions, determine what exactly you’ll work on and which benchmarks you want to meet, then focus strictly on the task at hand. Don’t multitask, let your mind wander, or get distracted.

The Importance of Focus

In That Little Voice in Your Head, former Google [X] chief business officer Mo Gawdat also points to the importance of taking accountability for your attention, but for slightly different reasons. Gawdat explains that controlling your attention is crucial for achieving happiness and success because when you let your mind wander, it usually gravitates toward negativity and rumination—you end up thinking about what you should have done in the past, what you’d rather be doing in the present, or worrying about what will happen in the future.

To help control your mind, Gawdat recommends filtering what you let inside it, as the Kremers also suggest. In particular, Gawdat says to train your mind to focus on positivity by actively looking for it in your surroundings, and to be aware of the information you’re allowing into your brain—rather than trusting other people, media sources, or your own inaccurate perceptions, rely strictly on facts you can gather from your own senses.

Further, while the authors say that controlling your mind is important to achieve flow, Gawdat says achieving flow is also important in controlling your mind and achieving happiness. This is because flow requires such intense focus that your mind is unable to wander into negative thoughts. Gawdat echoes the Kremers’ advice on reaching flow, but adds that achieving flow requires you to work toward a task that’s doable but also difficult—tasks that aren’t difficult don’t require your full focus and therefore won’t push you into flow.

Take Accountability for Your Finances

Next, the authors explain that your mindset and beliefs largely shape your perception of and access to wealth—limiting beliefs and a lack of personal accountability often create barriers to financial success. To overcome self-imposed barriers, review your beliefs and the other elements of your mindset to ensure they’re enabling rather than restricting you.

For example, consider your beliefs about money—rather than seeing wealth as positive or negative, see money as a neutral tool that can help you achieve certain ends. Remember that as you have control over your mental world, you can control your physical world by taking accountability for your actions and circumstances. You’re not at the mercy of the world or other people; rather, you have the power to achieve what you want.

(Shortform note: In Awaken the Giant Within, Tony Robbins adds that in addition to mindset and beliefs, there’s a third major reason why people struggle financially—they outsource responsibility for their finances to advisors. While it’s crucial to rewire limiting beliefs about money, letting others manage your finances prevents you from following the Kremers’ advice to take accountability for your money. To take matters into your own hands, Robbins recommends financially educating yourself. You can still seek advice from experts, but learn about your investments, where your money is going, what your options are, and what other experts say.)

Take Accountability for Your Energy

Finally, the authors explain that taking accountability for your energy is crucial because energy management dictates your success. Many believe that the more time you have, the more success you can gain; however, this thinking is flawed because time can’t be created. The solution is to use time wisely by using your energy more effectively—conserving it when possible and spending it on things that will give you the biggest returns.

The authors provide tips to help you manage your energy. First, determine your most productive hours of the day and work within them—for example, early in the morning or after lunch. Second, conserve energy by prioritizing tasks, simplifying them, delegating when possible, and setting boundaries to prevent burnout. Finally, make sure that the people you spend time with fuel rather than diminish your energy.

Create More Time to be Productive

In Someday Is Today, Matthew Dicks agrees that energy efficiency is the key to success. He also advocates prioritizing, simplifying, and delegating tasks, setting boundaries, and avoiding negative people. However, while the Kremers argue that preserving your energy matters because time can’t be created, Dicks contends that the purpose of efficiency is precisely that—to create more time for goals.

Dicks provides methods to create more time and preserve energy like optimizing your sleep schedule by creating a consistent bedtime and time for waking. Spending less time in bed creates more time during the day, and a consistent sleep schedule will improve sleep quality, giving you more energy. Dicks also warns not to fall into the trap of working during “peak hours”—instead, use every spare moment to work toward your goals, even brief intervals like waiting at the doctor’s office.

Part 4: Be Accountable in Your Relationships

The Kremers explain that reaching your full potential requires more than just focusing on yourself. You must also look outward and hold yourself accountable for how you treat, feel about, and communicate with others, as well as how others perceive you. When you fail to do so, you’re likely to damage relationships, cause misunderstandings, and create negative emotions for yourself, impacting your personal and professional success.

The authors explain that to hold yourself accountable for your relationships, you must develop emotional intelligence (EI)— including self-awareness, self-management, motivation, empathy and compassion, and social skills. EI enables you to make effective personal and professional decisions, communicate effectively with others, and build and maintain relationships. We’ll discuss each of the five components of EI in the following sections.

(Shortform note: In Emotional Intelligence 2.0, Travis Bradberry and Jean Greaves confirm the importance of emotional intelligence for success in your personal and professional life. While the Kremers discuss a longer list of abilities, Bradberry and Greaves adhere to the more traditional four pillars of emotional intelligence—self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, and relationship management.)

Self-Awareness

Developing self-awareness entails understanding your emotions and feelings and how they cause you to act. The Kremers write that learning self-awareness is the first step toward changing your feelings and behaviors for the better. It’s also one of the hallmarks of healthy relationships because it allows you to acknowledge your actions and their consequences so you can hold yourself accountable.

To foster self-awareness and improve relationships, the authors recommend understanding your triggers—the things that make you feel and act in certain ways. This way, you can take responsibility for your feelings and responses rather than blaming them on someone else’s actions. For example, acknowledge that your partner going out with friends (trigger) might make you anxious (emotion) but doesn’t give you the right to direct anger toward them (feeling and reaction) because they’ve done nothing wrong. Further, make sure you’re correctly labeling your emotions, as we discussed in Part 2.

(Shortform note: The authors of Emotional Intelligence 2.0 add that lacking self-awareness often causes people to be overwhelmed with stress and frustration. This leads them to blame their emotions on others—creating tension—and make bad, reactive decisions. The authors also offer ways to develop self awareness like recognizing the physical sensation of your emotions—for example, getting a rapid heartbeat when you’re anxious. This might help you better identify when you’re being triggered and what your triggers are so you can work on managing them, as the Kremers recommend.)

Forgiveness

Another reason self-awareness is important is that it’s the foundation of forgiveness. The Kremers write that forgiveness requires us to look inside ourselves to identify and release negative emotional patterns we feel toward ourselves and others. Forgiveness is necessary for both a healthy mindset and positive relationships: It helps us move toward abundance by allowing us to release negative feelings that bring us down, and it fosters positive relationships by allowing us to move past toxic feelings and reestablish trust.

(Shortform note: Jen Sincero reiterates the importance of forgiveness and the role of self-awareness in You Are a Badass, explaining that resentment isn’t productive as it not only damages your relationships, but it also harms you in your attempt to hurt others. She adds that the key to forgiveness is to show compassion to others—understanding that they likely acted in an effort to protect themselves, even if it was wrong. Sincero also states that forgiveness is about you—it’s your choice how you respond to situations.)

Self-Management

Managing your reactions is crucial for maintaining and improving your relationships. Self-management builds on self-awareness—once you’re aware of yourself and your impact, you can work to change how you feel, behave, and communicate with others. The authors explain that one of the first steps to managing your reactions is pausing before you respond—take a moment to understand your thoughts and feelings so you can express yourself in a respectful way rather than acting on impulse. You can also adopt techniques to soothe and regulate your emotions like practicing mindfulness or going to therapy.

(Shortform note: The authors of Emotional Intelligence 2.0 back up the Kremers’ argument, adding that self-management also helps you navigate complex situations with patience, focus on long-term development, and find peace with uncertainty. They also make additional recommendations that can help you practice self-management. For example, when you pause to collect your thoughts, practice focusing on your breath. This will not only help you collect your thoughts, but it will soothe you by giving your brain one of its basic needs—oxygen.)

Motivation

The Kremers explain that motivation enables you to work steadily toward long-term goals and resist instant gratification. It’s also what allows you to be an inspiring leader—when you’re committed to a goal, you lead by example, inspiring your employees to rally around a shared vision and do the same.

(Shortform note: Charles Duhigg likewise emphasizes the importance of motivation in Smarter Faster Better, adding a few tips to help foster motivation. For example, make choices that help you feel in control—research shows that feeling in control is motivating. Also, find meaning in your choices—linking choices to a higher purpose will motivate you even when you face difficulty.)

Empathy and Compassion

The authors explain that empathy and compassion are crucial for building and managing relationships. Empathy is understanding the emotional experiences of others, and compassion is using that understanding to extend kindness and support. In personal relationships, these help you foster stronger connections by showing others you care about them. In professional relationships, empathy and compassion help leaders understand their employees, resolve conflicts, and understand what will motivate and inspire workers.

(Shortform note: Psychologists affirm the importance of empathy and compassion in personal and professional relationships, adding that there are three types of empathy. The Kremers’ definition of compassion—using your empathy to help others—is what psychologists refer to as compassionate empathy. The second type of empathy, cognitive empathy, is similar to the authors’ definition of empathy—understanding others' experience and feelings. The third type of empathy is emotional empathy, where you not only understand but feel what another feels.)

Social Skills

Finally, the authors explain that social skills are one of the most important components of EI because they dictate how we communicate with others—how we express ourselves, how we’re perceived, how we handle conflicts, and how we connect with others. Failing to effectively communicate can cause misunderstandings and mistakes that can damage relationships.

To practice effective social skills and communication, the authors say that you must first practice active listening—give the other person your undivided attention and ask clarifying questions to make sure you understand properly. Also, think about how you’re going to express yourself before you speak: Be concise, choose the appropriate medium (some conversations should be in person rather than text), and use your knowledge about the other person to try and communicate in a way they’ll receive well.

(Shortform note: The authors of Emotional Intelligence 2.0 add that relationship management, or social skills, are crucial in personal and professional settings because they help us manage difficult but important conversations. In addition to the Kremers’ recommendations, the authors of Emotional Intelligence 2.0 suggest fostering social skills by being open with others and showing interest—build trust by being willing to divulge personal information and asking others about themselves.)

Part 5: Uncover Your Purpose and Reach Your Potential

The authors explain that uncovering your life purpose and holding yourself accountable for spiritual growth is crucial to achieving true fulfillment. Doing so will guide your decisions and help you take intentional and meaningful action that helps you reach your potential and benefits your community. In the following sections, we’ll discuss the three components of living your purpose and reaching your potential.

Identify Your Life Purpose

First, the authors say you must identify your life purpose—a journey of discovery and fulfillment that spans across some (or all) of the six main areas of your life: relationships, time, self (health and well-being), spirituality, finances, and career. Following your life purpose is crucial because it provides a unique sense of fulfillment. To identify your life purpose, take the following steps:

1. Identify what makes you feel passionate.
2. Consider your unique skills.
3. Reflect on your virtues.
4. Consider how you can help others.
5. Look for recurring themes in your life.
6. Ask loved ones their perspective on what your purpose might be.
7. Try things out to test what feels right.

(Shortform note: Motivational speaker Jack Canfield similarly emphasizes the importance of identifying your purpose in The Success Principles. However, he lists seven areas of life as opposed to six—relationships, leisure, health, finances, community, career, and personal growth. Canfield excludes the Kremers’ concept of time, and the Kremers exclude Canfield’s category of leisure. Canfield’s recommendations to uncover your purpose mostly align with the authors’, but Canfield doesn’t discuss reflecting on your virtues, considering your unique skills, or trying things out. Instead, he emphasizes brainstorming what you want in life—for example, by creating a list of 30 things you want to be, to have, and to do before you die.)

Embrace Spiritual Growth

The Kremers explain that a key step in fulfilling your life purpose and reaching peak accountability is embracing spiritual growth and your Quantum Purpose. They explain that your soul chose to be incarnated on Earth to learn spiritual lessons that help you understand your oneness with the universe and evolve—learning these lessons is your Quantum Purpose. Whereas the impact you make on earth is your life purpose (which we discussed in the previous section), your Quantum Purpose is the spiritual meaning for your soul’s existence.

(Shortform note: The authors’ idea of Quantum Purpose is similar to ideas in the Advaita Vedanta school of Hindu philosophy, which asserts that souls are reincarnated until they’ve evolved to the point of realizing their oneness with Brahman, the ultimate reality. Other faiths have similar concepts to Brahman that they refer to using terms like “God” or “the universe.”)

According to the authors, spiritual growth is crucial for fulfilling both your Quantum Purpose and your purpose in life. Spiritual growth requires you to gain a deeper understanding of life by acknowledging your connection to the universe—you are not isolated but rather a part of an interconnected whole. This realization sparks compassion, responsibility for your impact on others and the environment, acceptance of things you can’t control, the ability to learn from both good and bad experiences, authenticity, and more. These characteristics culminate into Quantum Accountability, the ability to achieve your life purpose, and the lessons needed to fulfill your Quantum Purpose.

(Shortform note: In The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success, Deepak Chopra reiterates the importance and benefits of spiritual growth in relation to success, adding that striving for success without spiritual connection often leads to harmful, fear-based success. When we lack spiritual connection, we’re entirely focused on the physical world and let others define success for us. We strive for superficial goals, and we obsess over control. The type of success we achieve in this way leads to constant fear and anxiety because we’re always chasing status and control.)