PDF Summary:I'm Not Yelling, by Elizabeth Leiba

Being a Black woman in predominantly white professional environments often means navigating microaggressions and diffused discrimination on a regular basis. In I'm Not Yelling, Elizabeth Leiba provides advice and anecdotes from her own experiences for Black women determined to thrive in these environments without compromising their identity.

The book lays out strategies for identifying and responding to subtle biases. It also examines the unique struggles of Black women in relation to their appearances, such as natural hairstyles and mannerisms. Through self-reflection and support networks, Leiba encourages Black women to reject oppressive norms and unapologetically embrace their authentic selves.

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Other Perspectives

• While the transatlantic slave trade certainly had a profound impact on the lives of enslaved Africans, code-switching might also be influenced by contemporary social dynamics and not solely by historical events.
• The concept of a monolithic "white culture" is overly simplistic and does not account for the diversity within white communities, nor does it recognize the fluidity and exchange of cultural traits between groups.
• The mental and emotional toll of blending in can vary greatly among individuals, with some experiencing it as a minor inconvenience rather than a substantial burden.
• The mental agility required to code-switch could potentially lead to cognitive benefits, such as improved executive function and problem-solving skills.

Leveraging your unique way of communicating and personal traits can result in liberation and benefits within your career.

Upon making the decision to stop modifying her looks and actions to conform to environments largely occupied by white individuals, Leiba noticed a surge in opportunities and a heightened sense of self-assurance in all her endeavors. She observed a growing unity among people from diverse ethnic backgrounds, cultures, and personal histories.

Leiba credits the rise in opportunity to the public's desire for genuineness. Attempting to cater to everyone frequently results in us seeming unremarkable and easily overlooked. Elizabeth Leiba advocates for Black women to embrace their natural hairstyles, including braids, locs, and twists, with pride. Elizabeth Leiba encourages the acceptance of our genuine ways of speaking and attire, championing the expression of one's true self rather than adhering to expected standards. Unapologetically accepting who you are can result in a shift in perspective that magnetically draws people towards you. Embracing this viewpoint lays the foundation for professional growth, creates opportunities for progression, and nurtures autonomy, culminating in accomplishments that surpass your most ambitious aspirations.

Practical Tips

• Create a "trait swap" challenge with a colleague or friend where you both agree to adopt one another's distinctive trait for a week. For example, if you're known for being detail-oriented while your colleague is praised for big-picture thinking, try to approach tasks from their perspective and vice versa. This exercise can help you appreciate your own traits more when you see the contrast and can also teach you when and how to leverage different aspects of your personality for various professional scenarios.
• Volunteer for a project or task outside of your comfort zone at work or in a community group. By stepping into a role that isn't typical for you, you'll be forced to adapt and learn, which can boost your confidence in your abilities and open your eyes to new opportunities that you might have otherwise overlooked due to self-imposed limitations.
• Develop a personal authenticity metric by setting specific, measurable goals for yourself in situations where you want to improve your authenticity. This could involve speaking up at least once in every meeting, sharing a personal story during a presentation, or giving honest feedback when asked. Keep track of your progress and adjust your goals as needed to continue challenging yourself to be more authentic.
• Test your specialized approach by offering a free mini-service or product to a select group that fits your target audience. Gather feedback to refine your focus. For instance, if you're a personal trainer specializing in postnatal fitness, you could offer a short series of online workout sessions for new mothers and use their feedback to tailor your programs to better meet their specific needs and challenges.
• Partner with a local salon to offer a workshop on the care and styling of natural hairstyles for those interested in transitioning. This can provide hands-on experience and knowledge, fostering a sense of community and support among participants who are embracing their natural hair.
• Start a personal style diary to track how your clothing choices align with your emotions and productivity. Each day, jot down what you're wearing and note how you feel and how well you perform tasks. Over time, you'll see patterns that indicate which attire makes you feel most authentic and effective.
• Create a "No Apologies" challenge for a week where you consciously avoid saying sorry for your preferences, choices, or opinions unless you've genuinely made a mistake. Instead of apologizing, explain your viewpoint or decision confidently. This might involve choosing a restaurant without asking for everyone's approval or wearing an outfit that's uniquely your style without excusing it.
• Develop a "skills swap" initiative with colleagues or peers where you exchange knowledge on topics you're self-conscious about with areas you're confident in. This not only helps you improve in areas you feel less adept but also reinforces your self-worth by teaching others. For instance, if you're great at public speaking but poor at Excel, find someone who's the opposite and teach each other your strengths.
• Create a "True North" board, similar to a vision board, but focused on your core values and personal goals. This visual representation can serve as a daily reminder of what truly matters to you. You might include quotes, images, and symbols that represent your deepest values and aspirations. When faced with decisions, look at your board to ensure your actions are aligned with these values.

Celebrating the natural resilience and appeal associated with Black hair and physical characteristics.

Elizabeth Leiba encourages Black women to embrace the natural beauty of their hair's texture and to challenge the prevailing beauty standards rooted in white supremacist ideology, which have long been imposed on Black women.

The book delves into the difficulties faced by individuals who experience bias and discrimination at work due to their natural hairstyles.

Leiba points out that Black women have a unique experience with discrimination in the workplace related to their natural hair. Women of African descent often encounter societal pressures that compel them to alter their inherent hair texture to conform to conventional professional norms or adapt it for acceptance in corporate settings. Braids, locs, an afro, or any other natural hairstyle unique to Black hair are seen as inappropriate, despite the lack of any policy to support this claim.

The author highlights that the roots of bias against certain hairstyles can be traced back to the era during which African women first set foot on American soil. The hair of Black women has frequently been described as challenging to maintain, unruly, and lacking in visual appeal. The endeavor to dehumanize Black individuals by marginalizing their inherent hairstyles only prevails if they acquiesce to such treatment.

Context

• Media portrayals often reinforce negative stereotypes about natural Black hair, influencing public perception and workplace attitudes.
• Activism and social movements have increasingly brought attention to the issue, advocating for more inclusive and equitable workplace standards that respect diverse cultural expressions.
• In the 18th and 19th centuries, laws such as the Tignon Laws in Louisiana required Black women to cover their hair in public, reinforcing the notion that their natural hair was unacceptable. These laws were part of broader efforts to control and suppress Black expression.

Other Perspectives

• There are instances where individuals with natural hairstyles have achieved professional success, indicating that while bias exists, it does not universally prevent career advancement for those who maintain their natural hair.
• Black women's hair is diverse and can range from easy to maintain to more challenging, just like any hair type, regardless of race or ethnicity.
• The concept of acquiescence suggests a level of choice that may not exist for individuals in vulnerable positions who must navigate discrimination while also securing their livelihoods.

The effort was focused on eliminating prejudice associated with hairstyles typically associated with one's ethnic background.

A coalition of entities initiated the CROWN Act, legislation designed to establish protections against discrimination based on hair texture and style. Legislation explicitly states that it is equally unlawful to discriminate on the basis of hair characteristics, which are associated with racial identity, as it is to engage in other types of racial discrimination.

Leiba makes the case for the importance of the CROWN Act in protecting Black individuals' rights to wear their natural hair without facing adverse repercussions. The book further promotes the acceptance and appreciation of hairstyles traditional to Black culture, encouraging a culture of inclusivity and equitable treatment for Black people in professional settings, educational institutions, and across society. As a result, Black women can experience the freedom to express their true selves in every aspect of their lives, without having to worry about conforming to dominant cultural norms.

Context

• The Act has garnered support from various advocacy groups, including the NAACP and the ACLU, as well as beauty brands and public figures who have campaigned for its adoption nationwide.
• As of 2023, several U.S. states have adopted the CROWN Act, but it is not yet a federal law, meaning protections vary across the country.
• Before the CROWN Act, there were limited legal protections specifically addressing hair discrimination, leaving many individuals vulnerable to biased treatment based on their natural hair.
• These hairstyles are not merely fashion choices but are deeply rooted in African traditions and can signify social status, family background, tribe, and spirituality.
• The act challenges societal norms and biases that prioritize Eurocentric beauty standards, promoting a broader acceptance of diverse expressions of identity.
• The pressure to conform to dominant cultural norms can lead to psychological stress and a diminished sense of self-worth among Black women, as they may feel compelled to alter their natural appearance to fit in.

Building a solid base of cooperation and assistance involves not only actively pursuing advice and forming alliances but also establishing connections with those who hold similar objectives and principles.

In this section of her work, Leiba emphasizes the significance of fostering an environment that facilitates the achievement of milestones by Black women, milestones that were previously deemed unreachable, through both direct interactions and virtual connections.

The book delves into the importance of mentorship and juxtaposes this concept with that of championing a cause.

Elizabeth Leiba understands that mentorship is crucial for career progression and increasing job fulfillment, as it significantly contributes to creating an inclusive atmosphere in both one's professional sphere and personal life. In balancing the complexities of work duties with family, personal, and love interests, it's essential to obtain advice from someone with deeper insight and knowledge. Seeking guidance and support at the onset of their careers can help black women carve out a definitive route to success in settings where there is a lack of diversity.

Approaches for recognizing and nurturing key connections with mentors.

Guidance can be informal. The occurrence was unforeseen. Leiba underscores the significance of possessing well-defined career goals when initiating contact with and seeking guidance from potential mentors. Your steadfast dedication and energetic efforts toward your goals clearly demonstrate to observers your sincere commitment to attaining those targets. The book additionally depicts you as an individual who could attract potential investors' attention and interest.

Leiba cautions against relying on one mentor to meet all your needs. Elizabeth Leiba suggests creating a coalition of supporters from various backgrounds who share your specific interests. This may include asking for guidance or advice during a networking event or just chatting informally with a trusted friend who has specific skills you'd like to learn more about.

Practical Tips

• Offer your own informal guidance to others by sharing your experiences and insights in casual settings, like during coffee breaks or in online community forums. Pay attention to the questions people often ask you, and use these as cues to offer your knowledge informally, fostering a culture of sharing and support within your circles.
• Develop a habit of creating contingency plans for your most routine activities. When planning your day, think of one thing that could go wrong with each activity and come up with a quick backup plan. If you're going to the grocery store and it might close early, your backup plan could be to have a list of other stores or to have ingredients for a simple meal at home just in case.
• Develop a "mentorship pitch deck" tailored to each potential mentor, highlighting your career goals, what you admire about their work, and specific questions you have for them. This approach personalizes your request and shows you've done your homework, making it more likely they'll be interested in helping you.
• Implement a "goal buddies" system by pairing up with a friend or colleague who also has goals they're working toward. Agree to send each other a daily text or email with what you did that day to advance your goals. This creates a sense of accountability and provides mutual encouragement to maintain energetic efforts.
• Leverage social proof by gathering testimonials and endorsements from respected individuals in your field. Reach out to colleagues, mentors, or industry leaders who are familiar with your work and ask them to provide a short written or video testimonial. Create a dedicated section on your professional website or LinkedIn profile to display these endorsements, which can serve as a powerful tool to build credibility and trust with potential investors.
• Use social media to follow and interact with multiple thought leaders in areas you're interested in. Engage with their content, ask questions, and participate in discussions. This virtual mentorship can provide a wide range of perspectives and advice, complementing your real-life mentorship experiences without the constraint of having a single mentor.
• Partner with local businesses to host themed meet-ups. Reach out to coffee shops, bookstores, or community centers to set up regular gatherings where people with similar interests can network and support each other. If you're into technology and innovation, you might organize a monthly tech talk where attendees can showcase their projects and seek feedback.
• Use a voice recording app on your phone to capture advice given during networking events, with the prior consent of the speaker. Later, transcribe these recordings into a personal advice journal. This allows you to reflect on the guidance received and plan actionable steps to implement it. For instance, if someone suggests a particular skill to develop, you can set goals and track your progress in your journal.
• Implement a "skill shadowing" day where you spend time observing and assisting a friend while they perform tasks that involve the skill you wish to learn. This hands-on experience provides you with practical insights and a better understanding of the nuances of the skill in a real-world context.

One should actively pursue advice from mentors of diverse backgrounds, rather than solely from individuals who reflect one's own identity.

Elizabeth Leiba recommends seeking mentors who have successfully overcome similar challenges within the same industry. The impetus often originates with Black women but reaches further than this group. Leiba emphasizes that having a sponsor, regardless of their race or gender, can be a formidable advocate in environments where you lack representation. Black women often encounter barriers to inclusion in certain settings due to a variety of factors, including a lack of representation in leadership roles, social isolation, or the neglect of their interest in being involved. Mentors and sponsors have the capacity to advocate for your work and make certain it is acknowledged, even when you are not present. They celebrate your career accomplishments and array of professional skills. They champion your quest for knowledge and promote your progress. They also provide a robust safeguard for individuals facing prejudices and subtle discriminatory remarks pertaining to their racial, gender, or cultural identities.

Context

• In many settings, Black women experience microaggressions—subtle, often unintentional discriminatory comments or behaviors—that can create a hostile or unwelcoming environment.

Other Perspectives

• The strategy of finding mentors who have overcome similar challenges assumes that past challenges will be predictive of future ones, which may not always be the case in rapidly changing industries.
• The concept of sponsorship can perpetuate hierarchical structures within an organization, where progress is tied to relationships rather than merit or performance.
• While mentors and sponsors can advocate for your work, this does not guarantee recognition, as workplace dynamics and politics can sometimes overshadow merit.
• The celebration of career accomplishments could inadvertently create a competitive or envious workplace culture if not managed carefully and inclusively.
• The idea of mentorship as a support system may not resonate with or be accessible to everyone, as some individuals may find greater success through self-directed learning or peer collaboration.
• The effectiveness of a mentor in safeguarding against discrimination may vary depending on the mentor's own understanding, experiences, and ability to recognize subtle forms of prejudice.

It is essential to actively encourage and promote one another's advancement.

Leiba characterizes sponsorship as a relationship in which someone actively supports your interests. Your reputation extends to places you have yet to explore. They recognize the worth of your efforts. They enhance your career progression by uncovering opportunities that might have remained hidden. They shield you from slight transgressions, even when you might not realize such incidents are occurring.

Sponsors possess the ability to leverage their influence to create new opportunities.

Leiba delves into a variety of mentorship strategies that are particularly designed for women of African American descent. Elizabeth Leiba advises mentors to consciously include Black women in their networks, especially in settings where there is a clear lack of diversity. Sponsors have the capacity to open doors to opportunities that might otherwise remain out of reach for Black women without their support. They are also adept at articulating the accomplishments, skills, and insights pertaining to Black women to their fellow professionals and associates. Recognizing the efforts of Black women not only sheds light on their work but also fosters career progression.

Establishing communities in both the physical world and the digital realm lays the groundwork for the development of a support network.

Seeking mentorship and sponsorship, one can also employ various tactics to secure support and allies in predominantly white settings. There are a variety of platforms available that help Black women build connections, including both in-person and online environments. Participation in industry groups, along with involvement in community events, book clubs, and social gatherings, are the various forms in which this behavior is exhibited. Elizabeth Leiba is of the opinion that these moments, whether they arise unexpectedly or are planned in advance, create a setting that is favorable for surmounting challenges, sharing thoughts, or embarking on joint ventures that reinforce the solidarity within the community.

Leiba explains that the pandemic's emergence has led these networks to shift their operations to digital platforms, which has expanded their reach and made them more cost-efficient. The book by Elizabeth Leiba explores the creation of nurturing communities by leveraging digital tools such as email groups, chat applications, social networks, video conferencing, and VR technology in the digital domain.

Other Perspectives

• In some cases, digital communities may exacerbate feelings of isolation or inadequacy due to the curated nature of online personas, which can present an unrealistic standard that members of the community may feel pressured to meet.
• Relying on mentorship and sponsorship within predominantly white settings may not address systemic issues that create the need for such support in the first place.
• The effectiveness of these platforms in building meaningful connections may vary, with some platforms potentially fostering superficial rather than substantive relationships.
• Community events and book clubs may not always be accessible to everyone, especially those with financial, physical, or time constraints, which can limit the opportunity to foster community support.
• The assumption that these moments are always favorable could overlook the need for ongoing, sustained efforts to maintain and build solidarity beyond isolated instances.
• The cost-efficiency of digital platforms can be offset by the need for investment in technology and training for individuals to effectively use these tools.
• Virtual interactions can lack the nuances of physical presence, such as body language and eye contact, which are important for building trust and understanding within a community.

Forging personal avenues and chances when conventional routes are inaccessible.

The passage from the book explores how Black women are progressively moving away from traditional employment to create their own companies, develop distinctive work environments, and establish autonomous streams of income.

Seeking economic self-sufficiency and personal satisfaction by engaging in entrepreneurial activities and supplementary income ventures.

Elizabeth Leiba understands that for many Black women, stepping down from their roles is seen as an essential action. The appeal of establishing a career based on personal conditions has increased as a result of the mental and emotional stress stemming from antagonistic work environments, subtle discrimination, lack of support from leaders and mentors, and blatant bigotry.

The growing trend of Black women leaving their positions in the corporate sector to start their own businesses is significant.

The author motivates Black women to recognize and take advantage of the various opportunities that can contribute to their professional fulfillment. Elizabeth Leiba advocates for a transformative view on our role in the professional environment, one that goes against the common notion that showcasing our experience, skills, qualifications, and educational achievements is necessary to validate our value at work. By allowing the universe to broaden our perspectives, we tap into the potential it offers.

Leiba contends that the traditional model of employment in America has been challenged and has undergone several transformations since the COVID-19 global pandemic started in 2020. Several Black women saw a chance to escape the unending pattern of overwork and inadequate acknowledgment within the business sector. These ventures, which started as additional sources of income, swiftly transformed into preferred professional trajectories and lucrative opportunities that were either not previously contemplated by Black women or from which they had been actively discouraged.

Practical Tips

• Keep a 'brag book' to document your professional achievements, positive feedback, and instances where you've overcome challenges. Regularly review and update it to prepare for performance reviews or job interviews. This personal record will not only boost your confidence but also serve as a tangible reminder of your value and potential, encouraging you to pursue new opportunities with conviction.
• Create a personal skills development plan that focuses on digital literacy and remote collaboration tools. Start by identifying free online courses or tutorials on platforms like Coursera or YouTube to improve your proficiency in software that facilitates remote work, such as Zoom, Slack, or Trello. This will prepare you for the modern workforce where such skills are increasingly in demand.
• Create a personal escape plan by setting aside a small percentage of each paycheck into a 'freedom fund.' This fund can be used to support you if you decide to transition to a different career or start your own business. Think of it as a financial safety net that gives you the freedom to leave an unsatisfying job without the pressure of immediate financial hardship.
• Develop a content creation side hustle, such as a blog, podcast, or YouTube channel, focused on a topic you're passionate about. This could be anything from cooking to personal finance. Use free tools like WordPress for blogging, Anchor for podcasting, or your smartphone for filming YouTube videos. Monetize your content through advertising, sponsorships, affiliate marketing, or selling digital products like e-books or courses.

Leveraging one's distinct personal identity and expertise to create multiple streams of revenue.

A considerable number of Black women have chosen to set up traditional businesses, yet many others have embraced the growth of the online market to create diverse income streams that can complement or entirely replace traditional jobs. Elizabeth Leiba underscores the significance of developing a distinctive personal brand, which can be leveraged to generate income by designing and marketing online courses, in addition to providing coaching or consultancy services. Elizabeth Leiba suggests that by leveraging their unique experiences, viewpoints, and expertise, Black women have the potential to turn public speaking into a lucrative endeavor.

Leiba, an instructor of higher education classes in business and entrepreneurship, clarifies that side hustles are now seen as more than mere hobbies or methods to supplement income. These supplementary income streams have created a substantial financial foundation that empowers numerous Black women, providing them with opportunities to expand and enhance their businesses, which can subsequently be inherited by future generations, thereby forging a durable legacy of wealth for families who once lacked such prospects.

Context

• There are increasing efforts from both public and private sectors to support minority-owned businesses through grants, training programs, and policy initiatives aimed at reducing barriers and promoting diversity in entrepreneurship.
• In competitive industries, a distinctive personal brand can serve as a differentiator, setting individuals apart from others with similar skills or offerings.
• Feedback from clients and students can be used to refine and improve offerings, ensuring that services remain relevant and competitive in the market.
• Leveraging digital platforms for public speaking can help reach global audiences, expanding influence and potential revenue streams beyond local or national boundaries.
• Side hustles can offer more flexible work arrangements, allowing individuals to pursue personal interests while managing other life responsibilities.
• Having multiple income sources can provide a safety net during economic downturns or job losses, offering financial stability and reducing reliance on a single employer.
• Offering a range of services or products can increase brand visibility and recognition, attracting a broader audience and potentially leading to more business opportunities.
• Engaging in policy and advocacy can help create systemic changes that support wealth-building opportunities for marginalized communities.

Prioritizing one's psychological health, emotional stability, and true self over adapting to detrimental work environments.

In all environments she moves through, Leiba places her mental and emotional health at the forefront, always striving to act with honesty and moral uprightness.

Developing self-worth that is independent of outside affirmation.

Elizabeth Leiba encourages Black women to focus on the distinct value they bring to their work environments rather than pursuing validation and acceptance from the prevailing group. Elizabeth Leiba advocates for Black women to cultivate a strong self-worth as a defense against the frequent microaggressions and discriminatory behaviors they encounter. Women of African descent should emphasize their distinctive abilities and individual backgrounds to showcase their worth within any organization.

Identifying the right moment to exit situations that no longer contribute to one's broader objectives.

Elizabeth Leiba believes that by listening carefully to the quiet voices inside them, Black women can discover their true position in society. Elizabeth Leiba recommends that Black women engage in daily self-reflection on their feelings as they get ready for their professional duties, before any meeting, or at the start of a work-related activity. Do they start their morning feeling vigorous and confident, or are they beset by nervousness, overwhelmed, or apprehensive about upcoming duties or obligations?

Elizabeth Leiba advises Black women to scrutinize their workplace settings, even though there has been a persistent notion that Black people must work twice as hard and grab every employment chance that comes their way. Recognizing when a job no longer serves her broader ambitions is essential, particularly for Black women who frequently strive for acknowledgment, appreciation, and esteem. Should we feel obligated to stay in a particular place but recognize that it does not satisfy our needs or support our pursuit of a higher purpose, we may need to look for a setting that better nurtures and values our abilities.

Context

• The concept of listening to the "quiet voices" refers to developing intuition and self-awareness. This involves paying attention to one's inner thoughts and feelings, which can guide decision-making and personal growth.
• Engaging in self-reflection can enhance emotional intelligence, which is crucial for managing interpersonal relationships and professional interactions effectively.
• The stress of navigating microaggressions and bias in the workplace can take a toll on mental health, making it important to assess whether a job is contributing positively to one's life.
• Making the decision to leave an unsatisfying job reinforces personal agency and empowerment, encouraging Black women to prioritize their own aspirations and well-being.