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Establishing trust is crucial for a salesperson's success, yet traditional approaches often fall short. In How To Get Instant Trust, Belief, Influence and Rapport!, Tom "Big Al" Schreiter argues that rapidly building rapport and gaining a potential client's confidence is essential before presenting your pitch.

Schreiter provides techniques to create an immediate bond by engaging with the subconscious mind. He explains how to leverage unconscious tendencies toward conformity, tradition, and perceived truth to bypass skepticism. Schreiter also details key linguistic patterns that help forge a sense of unity with prospective clients.

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  • Learning techniques from swindlers could be ethically problematic, as it may blur the lines between ethical persuasion and manipulation, even with good intentions.
  • The effectiveness of specific techniques and skills may vary greatly depending on the individual salesperson's personality and the client's receptiveness, suggesting that there is no one-size-fits-all approach to building rapport.
  • The idea that techniques should be used ethically to enhance communication might be too idealistic, as the interpretation of what is ethical can vary greatly among individuals and cultures.

Techniques for quickly forming a bond by engaging with the subconscious mind.

In this section of the book, Schreiter shifts focus from debunking common misconceptions about rapport to presenting practical methods for its swift cultivation. His approach centers on the idea that people are naturally more receptive to those they perceive as alike, emphasizing the importance of connecting at a deeper, often unspoken level to create a sense of togetherness.

Begin the dialogue with a statement that resonates with the pre-existing convictions of the person you are speaking to.

Schreiter suggests that people are instinctively attracted to those with similar beliefs and often approach those with differing views with caution. By initiating their pitch with a statement that resonates with the prospective customer, the salesperson smartly positions themselves as an ally, signaling an understanding of the broader situation. Schreiter suggests that such immediate harmony triggers an instinctive response that improves the likelihood of the person being convinced by the subsequent assertions.

Demonstrating empathy that resonates with the perspective of the potential client fosters an immediate bond.

Schreiter offers a variety of illustrative cases specific to various sectors, such as wellness goods, property markets, and dermatological items, which consist of introductory remarks crafted to align with a potential client's existing convictions. He underscores the importance of initiating conversations with assertions that naturally elicit agreement, thereby fostering a reflexive affirmation from the potential client. Tom "Big Al" Schreiter's method bypasses initial skepticism, allowing the salesperson's message to be received with more openness.

Match your speaking pace and tone to that of the potential client.

Schreiter illustrates the idea by comparing it to two individuals running together. If an individual moves ahead too swiftly or lags, it often leads to a breakdown in communication. However, if both jog at a similar pace, conversation flows naturally. This same principle, he contends, applies to communication in sales. An individual adept at rapid information processing may lose interest if the speaker's pace is sluggish. In both situations, a gap emerges that obstructs the development of a harmonious relationship.

Communicating at a speed that is out of sync with the prospective client's rhythm can lead to an inability to forge a bond.

Schreiter underscores the necessity of tailoring one's approach to communication to establish a connection that resonates with the potential client. This goes further than just aligning with their pace of speech; it also involves mirroring their tone, vibrancy, and physical gestures. By adeptly setting the pace, one can create a relaxed environment that improves the listener's understanding of the situation, which in turn fosters a greater willingness to participate.

Begin by presenting the potential client with a pair of statements they will readily concur with.

Schreiter recommends that beginning with a single shared truth can be effective, but establishing a pair of agreed-upon facts truly solidifies the connection between the salesperson and the potential client. He likens the method to creating a condition within the potential client that closely resembles a profound state of hypnosis. This method leverages our tendency to maintain consistency; after concurring with an initial assertion, we become predisposed to concur with following assertions that resemble it.

This further solidifies the sense of unity and understanding between you and the potential client.

Schreiter offers numerous illustrations on how to formulate introductory remarks that incorporate a pair of indisputable truths pertinent to the product or service in question. For example, a salesperson might remark, "Adhering to a diet can be challenging, and often, finding the time for physical activity is just not possible," when advocating for weight loss products. This assertion aligns with widespread challenges, prompting the potential client to express their concurrence through a nod, which in turn strengthens the feeling of a mutual viewpoint.

Employ a friendly grin to soften any instinctive guard a potential customer may hold against sales strategies.

Schreiter emphasizes how effortlessly a mere grin can dispel deep-seated doubts. He ties this concept to our primal survival mechanisms, emphasizing that infants naturally seek out smiling faces as indicators of security and reliability. This, he proposes, transcends infancy, with smiles continuing to act as potent signals of non-threat and approachability in adult interactions as well.

A genuine smile makes the prospect feel more comfortable and open to your message.

Schreiter recommends that individuals experiment by offering a smile to unfamiliar people and take note of the generally favorable response it provokes. This straightforward gesture, he contends, can effectively surmount initial reluctance and forge a bond. It transforms the engagement, altering the relationship from that of a salesperson to a more genuine person-to-person connection. While not a guaranteed rapport builder in isolation, a genuine smile creates a more welcoming environment for the rest of the interaction.

Practical Tips

  • You can practice mirroring body language during casual conversations with friends to create a subconscious connection. Start by subtly adopting the posture, gestures, and movements of your friends when you're chatting. If they lean forward, do the same; if they use their hands to express themselves, incorporate similar gestures. This non-verbal mimicry can help you become more attuned to others' rhythms in a low-stakes environment.
  • Develop a habit of active listening to enhance empathy in your interactions. When someone is speaking to you, focus entirely on what they're saying without planning your response. Nod in agreement, paraphrase their points to show understanding, and ask questions that delve deeper into their thoughts and feelings. This practice will train you to naturally demonstrate empathy that resonates with others, making your future communications more effective and genuine.
  • Create a personal 'ice-breaker' toolkit with statements that most people can agree with. Before meeting someone new, prepare a couple of universal truths or positive affirmations that are likely to elicit agreement. For example, "Isn't it great how a cup of coffee can brighten your morning?" or "I think everyone appreciates a moment of kindness in their day." Use these statements to initiate conversations and establish common ground quickly.

Essential linguistic patterns for building rapport.

In this section, Schreiter explores particular patterns of speech that, when employed with strategy, can greatly improve rapport. He characterizes such expressions as potent catalysts capable of tapping into ingrained subconscious frameworks and eliciting automatic responses. Instead of overwhelming potential clients with extensive justifications and proof, certain expressions serve as expedited routes to consensus and conviction.

Use phrases like "The majority of individuals..." to connect with the natural tendency of a potential client to agree with the general population.

Schreiter asserts that humans are inherently social creatures, programmed with a desire to belong and conform. This instinct, he argues, drives our preference for aligning with the majority, as it represents safety and security. Using expressions such as "most people" activates an innate tendency, prompting potential clients to be more open to subsequent information, as they instinctively desire to conform to what is seen as the standard.

By fostering an environment where the potential client is open, they become more predisposed to regard your following assertions as factual.

Schreiter emphasizes the persuasive power of a toothpaste advertisement which claims that an impressive "80%" of dental professionals recommend the product. He argues that the statement's effectiveness stems from its ability to tap into our inclination to align ourselves with the majority. The subtle implication that the product is endorsed by the majority makes it appear more credible and acceptable.

Employ universally acknowledged phrases like "It's widely recognized..." and "The common consensus is..." to circumvent any skepticism that the potential client may have.

Schreiter asserts that these expressions operate in a manner akin to the term "most people," yet they carry a more powerful impact. The salesperson deftly implies that the forthcoming details are well-recognized, employing terms such as "it's common knowledge" or "the general consensus is," which could make the prospective customer feel at odds with widely held convictions if they were to disagree.

The prospect's subconscious instantly accepts these statements as truth.

Schreiter argues that these expressions create an immediate connection within the mind's deeper unconscious levels. When information is presented as a commonly accepted truth, the individual considering it tends to accept its accuracy without question. Our brains utilize mental shortcuts to process information efficiently because it's not feasible to thoroughly analyze every piece of information we come across, as suggested by the author known as Tom "Big Al" Schreiter.

Initiating a dialogue with "You're aware of how..." often leads to the person you're speaking with signaling their concurrence through a nod.

Schreiter suggests that employing a particular phrase gives the impression that the prospect is already familiar with the information being discussed. This minor shift in perspective transforms the situation from acquiring novel perspectives to merely revitalizing one's grasp of concepts that are already familiar.

The individual you're speaking to is likely to be more receptive because they believe they can anticipate your next words.

Schreiter proposes that the expression serves to lower defenses. The individual being addressed becomes more open to the communication as they experience a feeling of recognition toward it. Salespeople can effectively lower the defenses of potential clients by prefacing their information with a phrase that implies mutual knowledge or understanding, making their pitch appear more persuasive and acceptable.

Invoking a time-honored adage has a comparable impact, leading the potential client to immediately embrace your words as sage advice.

Schreiter contends that our cultural upbringing instills in us a reverence for time-honored adages as cherished wisdom inherited from our ancestors. Invoking this cultural reverence, he suggests, can lend credibility and weight to a salesperson's message.

Individuals are naturally inclined to regard traditional adages as fundamental truths.

Schreiter compares the effectiveness of this technique to the inherent trust we place in universal truths. Just as we accept the sky's blueness without dispute, our minds tend to regard an adage as true without seeking additional evidence. This automatic acceptance bypasses potential skepticism, paving the way for the salesperson's message to be received more favorably.

Practical Tips

  • You can enhance your persuasive communication by starting conversations with references to popular culture or current events that most people are aware of. This taps into the same principle of aligning with the majority's beliefs. For example, if you're discussing financial habits, you might begin with, "As we've seen with the recent trend in budgeting apps..."
  • Create a personal blog or social media content series that shares stories or lessons framed around well-known proverbs or sayings. This leverages the trust people have in traditional wisdom. For instance, you could use the saying "A stitch in time saves nine" to talk about the importance of proactive health screenings.
  • When discussing new ideas with friends or colleagues, consciously affirm their knowledge before introducing your point. For example, if you're talking about environmental conservation, you might say, "You're aware of how important recycling is," before suggesting a new community initiative. This not only validates their understanding but also sets a collaborative tone for the conversation.

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