Most people spend their lives running from the thought of death. But what if facing death head-on could actually make us feel more alive?
The ancient Stoics had a radically different approach to mortality than we do today. Instead of denial and fear, they used death as a tool for living more meaningfully. Their counterintuitive approach shows us how embracing our finite nature can lead to greater appreciation, clearer priorities, and a more vibrant existence. Keep reading to explore concepts from Ryan Holiday, William B. Irvine, and Marcus Aurelius that show how the Stoic philosophy of death can change the way you experience life.
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The Stoic Philosophy of Death
In our modern world, we have developed an almost pathological avoidance of death. As William B. Irvine observes in The Stoic Challenge, we typically sweep it under the rug or operate on naive childhood understandings of death as leading to a happy afterlife. In his book The Obstacle Is the Way, Ryan Holiday notes that we often act as though we’re invincible and that we have plenty of time left, focusing our energy on trivial pursuits such as making more money, getting a promotion, or buying a bigger house.
(Shortform note: Looking at it from the other side of the coin, Irvine and Holiday might say that we all take life for granted. Psychologically, taking something for granted means that you assume automatically that you won’t ever lose it. In other words, it becomes more or less an unconscious habit to go on living as though life will never end rather than a choice we consciously make.)
But the ancient Stoics approached mortality in a radically different way. Rather than denying or fearing death, they embraced it as a pathway to a more meaningful life. This counterintuitive approach—using awareness of death to enhance living—forms one of Stoicism’s most powerful and practical teachings.
The Stoic understanding of death begins with a fundamental reframe. Marcus Aurelius reminds us in Meditations that even the greatest human life is insignificant; it blows away like smoke on the wind. This isn’t pessimism but perspective. When we consider that all the great heroes and emperors of the past are now gone—long since changed into something else by nature and time—we begin to see death not as a catastrophe but as part of the natural order.
For Marcus Aurelius, death represents transformation rather than destruction. He argues that, if death caused harm to the parts of the world, it would cause harm to the world itself; it would be like a machine grinding its gears. Since the world continues to function smoothly, death must not be harmful. Furthermore, he reasons, the gods would not have created such a fine world and then overlooked the fact that people—even those whom the gods love most—would disappear forever upon death.
This philosophical foundation leads to a crucial insight: death is a natural and necessary process, and there’s no reason for a rational person to be afraid of it. As Marcus Aurelius explains, the gods have given us the intelligence, skills, and tools that we need to avoid harm; therefore, if death were harmful, they would have given us a way to avoid it.
Stoic Techniques for Contemplating Death
Understanding death philosophically is one thing; developing a practical relationship with mortality is another. All three authors offer specific techniques for death contemplation.
Irvine explained that the Stoics actively practiced acknowledging human mortality in order to better appreciate their lives in the present. He describes two particularly powerful techniques that make use of the anchoring effect—a psychological phenomenon in which priming yourself with a reference point helps you see something in a new light:
- Realize that this could be the last time you’re doing something—whether cooking a meal, hugging a friend, or sitting down to work
- Contemplate that, someday in the future, you’ll likely wish you could return to this present moment. To an old and enfeebled version of yourself, your current life could seem like a wonderland.
Holiday advocates for regular meditation on death, arguing that you should spend time meditating on death and being mindful of your mortality; doing so will improve your life. He points to the transformative power of confronting mortality, citing the example of Michel de Montaigne. In 1560, he was thrown from a horse and nearly killed. This experience eliminated his fear of death, energized him, and created an insatiable curiosity about mortality.
Marcus Aurelius offers more analytical approaches. When fear of death creeps in, he suggests you examine what you’re actually afraid of losing: Am I afraid because I won’t be able to do this thing anymore? Through repeated examination, you’ll realize there’s nothing to fear. He also recommends keeping philosophy ready like a doctor keeps his instruments ready in case of emergencies—using philosophical analysis to understand and respond to thoughts about death.
| Alternative Ways to Appreciate Your Life If you’d prefer something a bit less macabre, try a regular gratitude practice. Contemporary research has linked gratitude practice to a general increase in well-being, and a wide variety of gratitude practices show promise. While you might not want to feel grateful that you’ll one day pass on, you can achieve a similar result to the other techniques by pausing daily to appreciate how alive you are, here and now. If you do like the macabre, you might try a Buddhist charnel ground meditation, which traditionally involves meditating in a setting such as a graveyard, where the reality of death is made concrete. The point is to break down any habit of clinging to existential hope (hope for salvation) and confront the nature of life as inevitably leading to death. This can help you to see life as it really is—replete with adversity and hardship, as Irvine says—and thereby live more fully now.) |
How Death Awareness Transforms Living
The remarkable paradox of Stoic death contemplation is that thinking about dying makes us more alive. As Irvine notes, knowing deeply that you’ll one day die can bring you more fully into living your life today.
Holiday contends that an awareness that our days are numbered creates a sense of urgency and puts our daily preoccupations into perspective. Rather than being depressing, this awareness can actually be energizing and motivating. Each day becomes a gift. When you’re mindful of mortality, you think differently about what matters.
Marcus Aurelius focuses on how death awareness helps us prioritize the present moment. He reminds us that all that a person ever has is the present moment, and that moment is all that’s lost upon death. Whether you live 50 years or 5,000 years, life amounts to the same thing: collections of moments that fade to nothing once they’re past.
This perspective shift has practical implications. As Holiday notes, with a sense that you’re on a deadline, you do what you need to do. Marcus Aurelius agrees that, in each moment, you should decide to do what’s best for you—while you still can.
Perhaps most powerfully, Holiday suggests that learning to derive value from confronting mortality prepares you for all of life’s challenges; you can do the same with every other obstacle.
Facing Your Final Moment
The Stoics didn’t just theorize about death—they prepared for it as the ultimate test of their philosophy. Holiday’s example of Montaigne shows how a brush with death can become a source of lifelong wisdom and purpose. After his accident, Montaigne spent the rest of his life reflecting on, studying, and writing about the day he nearly died.
Marcus Aurelius offers one of the most beautiful metaphors for approaching death with grace. He compares life to the theater: Like the curtain coming down at the end of a play, death will eventually come for each of us. Actors don’t get to choose how long a play is; the playwright made that decision long before they ever stepped on stage. The key is to exit gracefully; just as an actor bows and leaves the stage at her appointed time, leave this world with humility and grace—the same grace that you received all throughout your life.
For Irvine, death represents the final Stoic test—the ultimate opportunity to demonstrate that you’ve truly internalized Stoic principles. All the daily practices of acknowledging mortality prepare you for this moment when philosophy meets reality.
Marcus Aurelius reminds us that, when the time comes, philosophy will let you face death cheerfully. Dying is just one more situation that you must analyze with philosophy and respond to accordingly.
The Transformative Paradox
The Stoic approach to death reveals a profound paradox: by accepting the reality of mortality, we become more fully alive. By contemplating the end of our existence, we discover what makes existence meaningful. By preparing for death, we learn how to live.
As these three authors demonstrate—Irvine’s psychological insights, Holiday’s motivational wisdom, and Marcus Aurelius’s philosophical depth—the Stoic path doesn’t promise to eliminate the mystery of death. Instead, it offers something more valuable: a way to use that mystery as a source of clarity, purpose, and vitality in the life we have right now.
In a culture that denies death, the Stoics offer us permission to embrace it—not as an ending to fear, but as a teacher that can show us how to live with greater intention, appreciation, and grace. The final lesson is simple: memento mori—remember you will die. And, in remembering, discover what it truly means to be alive.
To learn more about stoicism in general, take a look at Shortform’s guides to the books referenced above:
