Cry Like a Man by Jason Wilson: Book Overview

Have you ever felt pressured to hide your emotions? Do you struggle with expressing vulnerability as a man?

In Cry Like a Man, Jason Wilson shares his journey of overcoming emotional repression and trauma. This powerful memoir explores Wilson's transformation from a troubled youth to a mentor for young men, offering insights on masculinity, faith, and healing.

Let's dive into Jason Wilson's Cry Like a Man and discover how it challenges traditional notions of manhood while promoting emotional growth.

Overview of Cry Like a Man

Jason Wilson's Cry Like a Man details the trauma of his youth that shaped his emotional growth and development. He explores his difficult childhood, marred by abuse, loss, and societal pressures that led him to bottle up his feelings and resort to unhealthy coping mechanisms. Wilson describes his profound spiritual transformation, his purpose in mentoring youth to overcome similar emotional turmoil, and the obstacles he faced in his personal relationships.

Through his faith-based transformative training programs, Wilson has positively impacted thousands of young men across Detroit. He bravely reckons with his past to become the mentor he never had but so desperately needed.

Wilson's Traumatic Childhood

Jason Wilson's early life was marked by a series of traumatic experiences that profoundly shaped his emotional development. Growing up in a tumultuous environment, he faced abuse, neglect, and deep sadness that would leave lasting scars.

One of the most significant influences on Wilson's childhood was the legacy of his grandfather, Estes Wright. In Fort Pierce, Florida, Estes had defended himself against racial slurs and violence in a climate of intense bigotry. The savage assault by six white men not only caused immediate pain but also left enduring psychological distress that resonated through generations. This traumatic event cast a long shadow over Wilson's family, with both he and his mother carrying the weight of their ancestors' experiences.

Further heartache came when Wilson's older brother Larry passed away under mysterious circumstances. Once considered promising, Larry's death appeared to involve foul play, as his lungs were found to be devoid of water. This loss left Wilson grappling with a constant burden of grief, with no clear way to process his feelings about the tragedy. The impact of Larry's death was profound and long-lasting, instilling in Wilson a persistent pattern of aggression and grief that he would struggle to overcome.

Dysfunctional Relationship With Father

Wilson's relationship with his father, Oliver, was strained and negatively charged. Often absent and verbally abusive, Oliver provided financially for the family but frequently expressed critical and demeaning opinions without restraint. This behavior left Wilson confused about masculinity, fidelity, and emotional expression.

The impact of Oliver's absence became even more pronounced after his parents' divorce. Wilson was left feeling more like a burden than a beloved son, creating a void that significantly affected his psychological well-being. Growing up without a supportive father figure had a detrimental effect on Wilson's emotional development and self-esteem.

Emotional Repression and Internal Conflict

As Wilson grew older, he found himself trapped in a state of emotional imprisonment. Societal expectations pressured him to uphold masculine norms and avoid any signs of vulnerability. He learned early on to view the open expression of emotions as a sign of weakness, causing him to hold back his tears and hide his suffering.

This societal pressure cultivated a facade of strength at the expense of authentic emotional expression. Wilson struggled with the fear of appearing vulnerable, which stemmed from these societal expectations to always appear strong. As a result, he developed unhealthy coping mechanisms to deal with his emotional turmoil.

Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms

At the age of sixteen, Wilson found himself grappling with PTSD and turned to pornography as a way to cope with his emotions. Without effective strategies for dealing with his emotional pain, he resorted to this and other reckless behaviors. These detrimental routines became a way for Wilson to handle the numerous traumatic incidents he had experienced in his youth.

The profound psychological impacts of his history made it difficult for Wilson to deal with and regulate his feelings in a productive manner. Despite his accomplishments later in life, he continued to face ongoing struggles in managing his emotions effectively. His turbulent early years, characterized by mistreatment and loss, created obstacles that hindered his ability to process grief and trauma in a healthy way.

Spiritual Transformation and Mentorship

Wilson's life took a dramatic turn when he experienced a profound spiritual transformation. His encounter with Christ, whom he refers to as Yahushua (the Hebrew name for Jesus), led to a complete shift in his perspective and purpose.

This spiritual awakening brought light into the dark and solitary corners of Wilson's mind, vanquishing his fears and changing the course of his existence. As his faith deepened, so did his commitment to helping other men, especially younger ones who reminded him of his earlier challenges. Wilson realized that his purpose was to guide young people facing difficulties, recognizing his own former hardships mirrored in theirs.

The Yunion and Catta

In 2003, Wilson took action on his newfound purpose by initiating a transformative training program under the auspices of The Yunion. This organization focused on mentoring and providing direction to youth who were struggling with similar issues to those Wilson had faced.

Building on this foundation, Wilson founded the Cave of Adullam Transformational Training Academy (CATTA). This innovative program combines martial arts with spiritual principles from the Bible to guide boys and young men on how to constructively handle difficult emotions. The CATTA's Emotional Stability Training program has become a cornerstone of Wilson's work, addressing the urgent need for emotional guidance among young males.

Wilson's programs have had a significant positive impact, influencing over ten thousand youths in the Detroit metropolitan area. CATTA alone is currently providing services to over four hundred young males, with a lengthy waitlist underscoring the urgent demand for such programs. Through these initiatives, Wilson skillfully addresses often neglected emotions such as anxiety and fear, leading individuals to confront and control these feelings with composure.

Challenges in Personal Relationships

While Wilson found success in his mentorship programs, he faced a multitude of obstacles within his interpersonal connections. These challenges impacted not only his close relatives but also his partner, creating tension and conflict in his personal life.

Marital Discord

Wilson's marriage to Nicole was rife with discord and teetered on the brink of dissolution. Their relationship suffered greatly due to accusations of hypocrisy when Wilson was seen in environments featuring exotic dancers. This behavior caused Nicole to question her trust in Wilson, creating significant strain in their marriage.

Despite regularly attending church, their conflicting interpretations of scripture and guidance on spiritual matters further aggravated the situation. The tension reached a breaking point when Nicole discovered a suspicious voicemail from Wilson's coworker, Vic. In reaction, she prepared for divorce by packing Wilson's belongings and placing them by the door. Wilson, consumed by intense feelings and viewing divorce as a simplistic escape, gave it serious consideration.

Communication breakdowns and unresolved conflicts plagued their marriage, especially during significant events like Christmas. However, both Wilson and Nicole sought reconciliation. They attended a Christian conference and tried to mend their relationship, but another argument revealed that their communication issues and unresolved conflicts persisted, leading them to consider separation.

Path to Reconciliation

Ultimately, the couple chose to give therapy another try. They received guidance from Dr. Tim and Ellie Broe, who offered in-depth counseling that enhanced their ability to communicate and assisted them in recognizing the obstacles within their partnership. Through regular sessions with this therapeutic duo, Wilson and Nicole started to repair their relationship. Both partners cultivated vital communication abilities and showed understanding and kindness towards one another. This process allowed their relationship to grow stronger than before, demonstrating the power of professional guidance in rekindling shared affection.

Caring for His Mother

As Wilson worked on his marriage, he also faced the challenge of tending to his mother, who was suffering from Alzheimer's disease. Her deteriorating condition, marked by memory lapses and emotional turmoil, required constant care from trained professionals. Wilson faced the difficult decision of moving her to a supportive living environment that he believed would provide a comforting and familiar atmosphere.

Initially, his mother was consumed by grief over the move. Her condition deteriorated, manifesting not only as dementia but also as intense suspicion, profound sadness, and frequent bouts of rage. Wilson observed her struggle with darkness and delusion, but also moments of clarity and appreciation, which eased his guilt over the decision to move her.

A Spiritual Transformation

Despite the challenges, Wilson noticed a significant transformation in his mother's character during her stay at the healthcare center. She adopted a serene and forgiving demeanor, a stark contrast to her previously unsettled nature. This change brought comfort to Wilson, who had struggled with feelings of guilt over the decision to place her in assisted living.

Wilson's mother expressed gratitude for his unwavering presence during her final moments, which brought him a sense of closure and reinforced his dedication to her care. He came to acknowledge his role as her child and the importance of being there for her in her time of need. This experience, while difficult, demonstrated the power of compassion and the potential for spiritual growth even in the face of devastating illness.

Reconciliation With His Father

Wilson's relationship with his father had been complicated by decades of resentment. However, in the last days of his father's life, Wilson chose to offer forgiveness and seek amends. This process was emotionally taxing, bringing up deep, unresolved issues, but ultimately leading to a powerful bonding experience.

The openness of Wilson's father about his battle with Parkinson's disease set the stage for the rekindling of their relationship. Wilson managed to face his father's vulnerabilities, which in turn enabled him to offer forgiveness and honor his father's memory. The pivotal moment in repairing their relationship came when his father expressed love and pride, particularly after hearing Wilson's recorded church sermon.

As Wilson honored his father's memory, he recognized their shared susceptibility and the essence of their humanity. He mourned the lost opportunities while simultaneously discovering comfort in their reconciliation. It's evident that Wilson and his father experienced a deeply moving moment of cathartic understanding and connection in their final moments together.

This journey of reconciliation with his father allowed Wilson to overcome resentment and find closure. It demonstrated the power of forgiveness and the importance of addressing unresolved emotional issues, even late in life. Through this experience, Wilson was able to find peace and healing in his relationship with his father, completing an important chapter in his emotional growth.