{"id":95124,"date":"2023-03-09T10:28:00","date_gmt":"2023-03-09T14:28:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=95124"},"modified":"2023-03-10T11:38:28","modified_gmt":"2023-03-10T15:38:28","slug":"how-to-face-your-fears","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-face-your-fears\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Face Your Fears: 4 Tips for Building Courage"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>Is fear getting in the way of you <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-live-your-best-life\/\">living your best life<\/a>? How can you be brave and face your fears?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Facing your fears is a rite of passage in life. No matter what age we are, we\u2019re all scared of something, which means we\u2019re constantly battling fears.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Take initiative with your life and learn how to face your fears with these life-changing tips.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<!--more-->\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-understanding-fear\"><strong>Understanding Fear<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Fear, as detrimental as it is to your progress, is comforting. You\u2019re used to living with it, and if you&#8217;re honest, <strong>you have to admit that it\u2019s easier to do nothing out of fear than put your heart on the line for what you believe in<\/strong>.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>According to Steven Pressfield\u2019s book <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/app\/book\/the-war-of-art\/preview\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><em>The War of Art<\/em><\/a>, the most common fear encompasses your relationship with the external world. What will people think of you if you seek internal fulfillment? You\u2019re afraid you will lose your tribe. You\u2019re afraid of failing and the humiliation that comes with it. You fear a loss of financial or social stability. You\u2019re afraid of wasting your time, which you believe is finite. You\u2019re afraid of the \u201cI-told-you-so\u2019s\u201d from people who don\u2019t understand your dreams. You fear finding out you&#8217;re a fraud or not capable of living up to your calling. You\u2019re afraid to find out you\u2019ve been wrong about your calling.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>These are valid fears, but they\u2019re not the main fears that halt you in your tracks like quicksand. You never talk about this fear, not even to yourself. This fear is the fear of succeeding. You fear success will make you lose the life you\u2019ve grown accustomed to. You don\u2019t want to step out of your bubble, because you\u2019re worried you\u2019ll never be allowed back in. The truth is, you will lose some or all of that life, and that\u2019s not a bad thing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-face-your-fears-with-these-tips\"><strong>Face Your Fears With These Tips<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Now that you know where fear stems from, what can you do with that knowledge? Here\u2019s how to face your fears and be the person you\u2019ve always dreamed of becoming.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-1-use-fear-as-a-motivator\"><strong>1. Use Fear as a Motivator<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>When taking extreme action, you\u2019ll experience fear because you\u2019re going out on a limb by yourself. Grant Cardone\u2019s book <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/app\/book\/the-10x-rule\/preview\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><em>The 10X Rule<\/em><\/a> claims everyone fears things in life. The key is what you do with fear. Rather than let it sap your confidence and momentum, use it to spur you toward your goals.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Fear is beneficial because:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\"><li><strong>Fear is an indication you\u2019re on the right track<\/strong>: you\u2019re taking the right actions in the right amounts. You\u2019re pushing yourself beyond your comfort zone. (Not pushing yourself beyond what\u2019s comfortable only gets you more of the same.)<\/li><li><strong>Fear is a motivator<\/strong>: Most of what you fear doesn\u2019t happen. Instead of avoiding fear, use it to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-inspire-yourself\/\">motivate yourself<\/a> to act. If you\u2019re afraid to call on a particular client, or raise a concern with your boss, do it. If you fear requesting a client\u2019s business, persist in asking for it. The actions you fear often will give you the greatest return.&nbsp;<\/li><li><strong>Fear helps you grow<\/strong>: Embrace fear because it enables you to do new things and grow. The more you act despite fear, the more confident you\u2019ll become in doing new things. <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-push-yourself\/\">Push yourself<\/a> past fear; then push yourself until you&#8217;re afraid again, act again, and so on. By continually <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-overcome-your-fears\/\">overcoming fears<\/a>, you can build an extraordinary life. Turn fear into fuel.<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>The more time you give fear to build up, the stronger it becomes<\/strong>. The more time you spend thinking about and imagining what can go wrong in a situation, the more apprehensive you become.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Many people use one of the following excuses to delay acting when they\u2019re afraid:&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\"><li>They tell themselves they need more time to prepare, or<\/li><li>They tell themselves, \u201cThis isn\u2019t a good time.\u201d<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p>Either of these just gives the fear more time to build. Instead,<strong> immediately do the thing you\u2019re apprehensive about. The <\/strong><strong><em>only<\/em><\/strong><strong> thing that will banish fear is action<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-2-deconstruct-your-fear-to-take-away-its-power\"><strong>2. Deconstruct Your Fear to Take Away Its Power<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>With <em>The 10X Rule<\/em>\u2019s advice, you learned how to use fear to point you in the right direction. Now with the help of <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/app\/book\/courage-is-calling\/preview\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><em>Courage Is Calling<\/em><\/a> by Ryan Holiday, you\u2019ll learn how to face your fears by taking away their power.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Holiday suggests <strong>you take away power from your fears by <\/strong><strong><em>logically deconstructing them<\/em><\/strong>. We tend to imagine the worst-case scenario related to our fears, but the truth is often a lot less frightening than we presume it is.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Holiday traces the practice of deconstructing fears and anxieties back to Seneca, a Roman Stoic philosopher, and more recently, to entrepreneur Tim Ferriss\u2019s \u201cfear setting\u201d exercise. To understand and pick apart your fears, first, consider how likely it is that they\u2019ll come true. Picture the circumstances that would cause them to come true. Then, prepare yourself for these scenarios: This removes the fear of the unknown. Once you\u2019ve thought through your fears <em>and<\/em> identified solutions to combat them, you\u2019ll be able to move forward with confidence that you can address anything that comes your way.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-example-fear-of-public-speaking\"><strong>Example: Fear of Public Speaking<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p>To illustrate how to logically deconstruct something you\u2019re afraid of, let\u2019s look at a common fear: public speaking. For many people, the thought of speaking in any group setting creates feelings of intense anxiety. You may be afraid that you\u2019ll forget the words you\u2019re supposed to say or embarrass yourself in front of people whose opinions you value.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Instead of dwelling on that fear, play out the scenario logically. In all likelihood, you\u2019ll get through your public speaking moment with minimal issues. Your anxiety might cause you to stumble a little, or you might have a tough crowd, but even if the worst-case scenario happened\u2014you trip on the stage, you forget the words, and so on\u2014you\u2019ll still be okay. You\u2019ll move on with your life, the other people in the audience will forget, and you\u2019ll have a funny story to tell. Giving into fear won\u2019t prevent those things from happening, and it causes unnecessary suffering before the event occurs.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>You could prepare for potential public speaking challenges by writing your points on note cards so you have something to refer to if you forget what you\u2019re supposed to say. Or, before you go on stage, you could do a <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/breathing-exercises-for-beginners\/\">breathing exercise<\/a> that calms your heart rate and helps you think more clearly.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-3-stop-making-excuses\"><strong>3. Stop Making Excuses<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/app\/book\/the-10x-rule\/preview\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><em>The 10X Rule<\/em><\/a> also advises you to stop using excuses to avoid the things you fear. Everyone uses excuses\u2014we all have favorites we use repeatedly. Excuses are reasons you come up with justifying what you do or don\u2019t do. Popular excuses include:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\"><li>I don\u2019t have the money.<\/li><li>I have kids.<\/li><li>I\u2019m married\/not married.<\/li><li>I\u2019m overworked.<\/li><li>I don\u2019t have time to take classes.<\/li><li>I have a terrible boss.<\/li><li>The economy is bad.<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p>But excuses aren\u2019t the real reasons motivating what you do; they\u2019re a rewrite of the facts to make you feel better later. For example, you might turn down a promotion and say it\u2019s because you don\u2019t feel qualified when, in reality, you\u2019re afraid of the additional responsibilities. You can\u2019t create change or improve any situation until you acknowledge the real reason for your actions or inactions. When you make excuses, you\u2019re refusing to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/accepting-responsibility\/\">take responsibility<\/a> for your life. Staying in your comfort zone won\u2019t make you more successful.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>If you believe <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/success-is-your-duty\/\">success is your duty<\/a> rather than an option, you must commit yourself to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/conquering-your-fears\/\">overcoming your fears<\/a> and stop hiding behind excuses.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-4-don-t-think-about-the-future\"><strong>4. Don\u2019t Think About the Future<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Many people remain stagnant in life because they fear what their decisions could mean for the future. What they don\u2019t realize is that if they face their fears and make big decisions, the outcomes could be better than they ever imagined. Here, we\u2019ll explore Jen Sincero\u2019s tips for staying in the present from her book <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/app\/book\/you-are-a-badass\/preview\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><em>You Are a Badass<\/em><\/a>, while also looking to the past to make us more comfortable about our choices.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>These tips will help stop <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/focus-on-the-future-not-the-past\/\">focusing on the future<\/a> so you can face your fears:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Look to the past<\/strong>. Think about something in your past you were afraid of. How do you feel about it now? Does it even give you a twinge of fear anymore? When you face your next challenge, remember that no matter how big it feels now, someday it will seem insignificant. Envision your current challenge from the future\u2014from a place of victory\u2014and it will lose much of its power to terrify you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Try a different perspective<\/strong>. When you\u2019re enveloped in fear, try looking at it from a different point of view. Break it down and pinpoint what you\u2019re really afraid of, and then flip it around to make it work for you. For example, say you want to write a book but you can\u2019t get started. Ask yourself why. The answer could be, \u201cI\u2019m scared it will be awful.\u201d So what happens if it\u2019s awful? \u201cI&#8217;ll be ashamed.\u201d So basically, you\u2019re not writing a book to protect yourself from <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/feeling-ashamed\/\">feeling ashamed<\/a>. Then flip this around. How ashamed will you be if you <em>don\u2019t<\/em> write your book? Very! By <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-change-your-perspective\/\">changing your perspective<\/a>, you can use the fear of <em>not<\/em> doing the thing you&#8217;re scared of as fuel.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Be in the moment<\/strong>: Right now, is anything scary happening? Or are thoughts in your head freaking you out? Being afraid before something happens depletes your energy. Instead, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-stay-in-the-moment\/\">stay in the moment<\/a> and connect to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/connecting-with-your-higher-self\/\">your higher self<\/a>. In the moments before you step into something scary\u2014asking for a promotion, jumping out of a plane\u2014keep your energy high and your belief in miracles strong. You\u2019ll find you\u2019re better equipped to deal with the situation and realize it&#8217;s scarier in your mind than in reality.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Limit the negative input you receive<\/strong>. The bad news you read and watch builds into your fear. But wallowing in the pain and suffering of others isn\u2019t helping anyone. If you really want to help the world, do your work from a place of power and joy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Don\u2019t think about upsetting things in bed at night<\/strong>. Our fears feel greatly magnified at 3 am. But there\u2019s nothing you can do about it. Instead, don&#8217;t waste precious time thinking about your problems\u2014there\u2019s nothing you can do about them at that point, and inevitably the next morning they don\u2019t seem as scary. Use <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/eckhart-tolle-meditation-mindfulness\/\">meditation<\/a> to banish troubling thoughts. Focus on relaxing your body one muscle at a time. Do whatever you can to get a good night\u2019s sleep\u2014because being exhausted the next day won\u2019t help you solve your problems.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-don-t-be-afraid-to-make-difficult-choices\"><strong>Don\u2019t Be Afraid to Make Difficult Choices<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p>The future is scary because we can\u2019t predict it. With Ryan Holiday\u2019s advice in <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/app\/book\/courage-is-calling\/preview\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><em>Courage Is Calling<\/em><\/a>, you can easily accept uncertainty and be bold in <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/methods-of-decision-making-crucial-conversations\/\">decision-making<\/a>. The key to doing this without fear is to make the hard choices.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Holiday argues that facing your fears requires you to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/be-decisive\/\">be decisive<\/a>. <\/strong>You can\u2019t <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/no-one-can-predict-the-future\/\">predict the future<\/a>, so deliberating about a decision for a long time won\u2019t help. To move forward, you\u2019ll eventually have to accept uncertainty and have faith that your choice will work out.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Maybe you\u2019ve always wanted to quit your desk job to run your own business, or you\u2019ve always wanted to live in another country. You may or may not succeed, but Holiday says to do it anyway even if you\u2019re afraid of failing. Simple, everyday existence brings many risks, so it\u2019s pointless to always prioritize safety. Sometimes you need to sacrifice your security so you can evolve and grow.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Don\u2019t spend all your time afraid to make the wrong decision. <strong>Instead, have the courage to be bold and decisive.<\/strong> When you spend too long analyzing possible outcomes, Holiday asserts that your inaction chooses for you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>One example of this would be choosing not to vote in your country\u2019s elections even though you\u2019re eligible. When you don\u2019t vote, you\u2019re essentially choosing the candidates who win and the laws that get passed, regardless of whether you\u2019d have supported them with your vote or not.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Not making choices can have dangerous consequences when the stakes of your decisions are high. For example, if you witness injustices in your community and you don\u2019t speak out or act against them, then you\u2019re playing a part in their continued existence. Silence means you choose to accept the current reality.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-you-re-ready-to-confront-your-fears\"><strong>You\u2019re Ready to Confront Your Fears<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Now that you know how to face your fears, it\u2019s time to put these tips into practice. The one thing to always remember is to set aside your doubts so you don\u2019t psych yourself out. From there on out, you\u2019ll live a life of courage that you never thought was possible.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>Did these tips help you learn how to face your fears? Let us know in the comments below!<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Is fear getting in the way of you living your best life? How can you be brave and face your fears? Facing your fears is a rite of passage in life. No matter what age we are, we\u2019re all scared of something, which means we\u2019re constantly battling fears. Take initiative with your life and learn how to face your fears with these life-changing tips.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":14,"featured_media":86322,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[42,43],"tags":[452],"class_list":["post-95124","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-motivation","category-self-improvement","tag-guides","","tg-column-two"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v24.3 (Yoast SEO v24.3) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>How to Face Your Fears: 4 Tips for Building Courage - Shortform Books<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Fear is a human emotion that can overwhelm you if not managed correctly. Learn how to face your fears and build a courageous mindset.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-face-your-fears\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"How to Face Your Fears: 4 Tips for Building Courage\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Fear is a human emotion that can overwhelm you if not managed correctly. 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