{"id":86489,"date":"2022-12-06T12:28:00","date_gmt":"2022-12-06T16:28:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=86489"},"modified":"2022-12-19T11:58:13","modified_gmt":"2022-12-19T15:58:13","slug":"holly-whitaker-quit-like-a-woman","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/holly-whitaker-quit-like-a-woman\/","title":{"rendered":"Holly Whitaker&#8217;s Quit Like a Woman: Overview"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>What is Holly Whitaker&#8217;s <em>Quit Like a Woman<\/em> about? What are the main takeaways of the book?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>In <em>Quit Like a Woman, <\/em>Whitaker contends that we as a society see alcohol, addiction, and recovery all wrong\u2014that is, exclusively through a masculine, patriarchal lens. This means we misunderstand what addiction is, what causes it, and how to treat it, especially for women.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Read below for a brief overview of Holly Whitaker&#8217;s book <em>Quit Like a Woman<\/em>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<!--more-->\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-quit-like-a-woman-by-holly-whitaker\"><strong><em>Quit Like a Woman<\/em> by Holly Whitaker<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Holly Whitaker&#8217;s <em>Quit Like a Woman<\/em> takes on society\u2019s relationship with drinking and recovery. She argues that alcohol is always bad for our bodies but that alcohol companies have persuaded us that drinking is a normal part of adult life and that the only people who shouldn\u2019t drink are fully-fledged alcoholics who exhibit extremely destructive behavior. Because we\u2019re fed these lies, we normalize drinking poison and don\u2019t question our drinking habits, even if they make us unhappy. For those who want to overcome an addiction to alcohol\u2014or any other substance\u2014Whitaker offers a holistic recovery process revolving around healing your inner wounds.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Part 1: Whitaker\u2019s Journey Through Alcoholism<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Whitaker recounts her recovery journey, from her denial of her addiction to acceptance of her addiction, and finally, her attempts to quit.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Whitaker\u2019s Denial of Her Alcoholism<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p>Whitaker started drinking at age 13 and continued drinking throughout high school, which led to bad grades, a reputation as being sexually promiscuous, and <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/consequences-of-low-self-esteem\/\">low self-esteem<\/a>. In college, she got her life back on track, but when she later started moving up the corporate ladder at a healthcare startup, her drinking, drug use, eating disorder, and spending spiraled out of control.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Whitaker\u2019s Recognition of Her Alcoholism<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p>However, over time, Whitaker began to despise her high-pressure, drink-heavy lifestyle and tried to get herself on track by meditating, eating well, and doing yoga\u2014though, notably, not by giving up drinking. Then, one morning, she woke up hungover in her filthy apartment on a stained mattress without sheets and realized she couldn\u2019t do this anymore. She realized the first step toward building a lifestyle she wanted was to stop drinking.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Whitaker\u2019s Quitting Alcohol<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p>Whitaker quit drinking twice before doing so successfully. The first time, she quit because she became convinced she had Borderline Personality Disorder. This, to her, explained her struggle with alcohol and was a good reason to stop drinking. She stayed sober for eight weeks before drinking again. This started a period of binging and vacillating between drinking and being sober. She went sober again for two weeks and finally went fully sober on April 14, 2013.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Part 2: Truths and Lies About Alcohol and Recovery Programs<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Why did Whitaker struggle for so long to recognize her alcoholism? She claims it\u2019s because <strong>we\u2019re conditioned to believe drinking is normal and enjoyable and only a problem for people with an inborn weakness showing <em>obvious <\/em>and <em>extreme <\/em>symptoms of alcohol addiction.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Part 3: The Real Cause of Alcoholism: Inner Wounds<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Now that we\u2019ve covered the lies about alcohol and alcoholism, let\u2019s look at what Whitaker feels to be a more common <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/what-causes-alcoholism\/\">cause of alcoholism<\/a> than the generally assumed <em>genetic<\/em> basis for addictive behavior. While some people do have a biological predisposition to addiction, <strong>addiction is also a symptom of inner suffering that can arise in response to the challenges of existing in a patriarchal, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/market-society\/\">capitalist society<\/a><\/strong>.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Whitaker explains that when you\u2019ve suffered trauma, had a difficult upbringing, are societally oppressed or marginalized, have mental health issues, don\u2019t have a strong support network, or suffer from other inner pain, you\u2019re more likely to turn to outside sources\u2014drugs, alcohol, shopping, and so on\u2014for the comfort and validation you can\u2019t give yourself. For instance, you might eat excessively to make yourself feel better about a bad test grade you know your parents will punish you for, or you might drink to numb the pain of a workplace microaggression.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>When you repeatedly use an outside substance to cope with inner pain, you reinforce a neurological <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/the-cycle-of-addiction\/\">cycle of addiction<\/a> to that substance<\/strong>, continues Whitaker: Outside sources of pleasure trigger the release of dopamine, the happiness hormone. Then, the substance triggers the subsequent release of glutamate, which makes you <em>remember <\/em>how happy the addictive substance made you feel so you\u2019ll want to take it again. When this cycle repeats for long enough, you come to believe the pleasurable substance is not only enjoyable but <em>necessary<\/em> for survival, and you prioritize it over true survival needs, like finding nourishment, procreating, and defending yourself. You thus become addicted, concludes Whitaker.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Part 4: The Five Facets of Whitaker\u2019s Approach to Recovery<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Whitaker breaks her recovery approach into five facets, which we\u2019ll explore below. She stresses that this type of recovery isn\u2019t linear and goal-oriented, like AA. Rather, it\u2019s a journey and as much about discovering yourself as getting sober. Further, your journey will be unique to you, and you must explore and move along it in the best way for you.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Facet #1: Be Kind to Yourself<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p>Whitaker argues that one of the most important facets of your recovery journey is to <strong>learn to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-go-easy-on-yourself\/\">be kind to yourself<\/a> to heal your inner wounds<\/strong>. Only when you\u2019re gentle and forgiving with yourself, rather than severe and punitive, will you be able to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-stop-suffering\/\">stop suffering<\/a> permanently.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Facet #2: Form New, Good Habits to Replace Old, Bad Habits<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p>The second facet of recovering is to<strong> create positive habits that make you think less about whether to engage in an addictive habit<\/strong>, writes Whitaker. When you automate healthy processes in your daily life that replace old, addictive processes, you reduce the amount of conscious thought you put into them and give yourself less opportunity to even <em>consider <\/em>engaging in the addictive behavior.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>For instance, if you\u2019re trying to overcome fast food addiction and normally stop by McDonald\u2019s to soothe yourself with food after work, you might form the new habit of stopping by a park on the way home and sitting in the sun. Once you\u2019ve solidified this habit, you won\u2019t have to work so hard to <em>resist <\/em>McDonald\u2019s because your decision to go to the park will be almost automatic.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Facet #3: Set Up a Sustainable, Self-Protective Lifestyle<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p>The next facet of Whitaker\u2019s recovery strategy is to set up a long-term lifestyle that makes you happy, maintains your mental health, and protects you from people and things that could trigger addictive behaviors.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Facet #4: Deal Effectively With Other People<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p>The fourth facet of your recovery journey is learning how to deal effectively with others, writes Whitaker. Navigating relationships as a newly sober person can be difficult because many of them will change now that you\u2019re no longer drinking.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Facet #5: Harness Recovery as a Social Justice Tool<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p>Finally, as you progress through your recovery journey, the new ways you see the world and the critical eye you bring to existing systems (the alcohol industry and our collective belief in the goodness of alcohol, for example) might attune you to broader injustices in the world. As you open your eyes to iniquity and oppression, consider using that knowledge to help catalyze change.&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>What is Holly Whitaker&#8217;s Quit Like a Woman about? What are the main takeaways of the book? In Quit Like a Woman, Whitaker contends that we as a society see alcohol, addiction, and recovery all wrong\u2014that is, exclusively through a masculine, patriarchal lens. This means we misunderstand what addiction is, what causes it, and how to treat it, especially for women. Read below for a brief overview of Holly Whitaker&#8217;s book Quit Like a Woman.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":14,"featured_media":34869,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[40,16,43],"tags":[830],"class_list":["post-86489","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-books","category-health","category-self-improvement","tag-quit-like-a-woman","","tg-column-two"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v24.3 (Yoast SEO v24.3) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Holly Whitaker&#039;s Quit Like a Woman: Overview - Shortform Books<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"In Quit Like a Woman, Holly Whitaker teaches readers that there are other paths to sobriety than AA. 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