{"id":86353,"date":"2022-12-11T00:26:00","date_gmt":"2022-12-11T04:26:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=86353"},"modified":"2022-12-14T15:48:34","modified_gmt":"2022-12-14T19:48:34","slug":"distorted-perception-of-reality","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/distorted-perception-of-reality\/","title":{"rendered":"How a Distorted Perception of Reality Upsets the Formula for Joy"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>How can exaggerations keep you from being happy? How can you bring your perceptions into better alignment with reality?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>An exaggeration is a <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/acceptance-of-reality\/\">distorted perception<\/a> of reality. This distortion causes you to have <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/impossible-expectations\/\">unrealistic expectations<\/a>. When those expectations aren&#8217;t met, you suffer.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Keep reading to discover how exaggerating interferes with your happiness.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<!--more-->\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-distorted-perception-of-reality\">Distorted Perception of Reality<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Gawdat argues that, when your brain needs your attention, it <em>exaggerates <\/em>your perceptions so it can\u2019t be ignored. For example, if you\u2019re outside and a bush rustles, your brain might exaggerate the rustling noise to ensure you don\u2019t miss any potential predators.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>In particular, our brain tends to exaggerate negative possibilities, because these pose the biggest threat to our survival. For instance, in the wake of 9\/11, the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.pewresearch.org\/politics\/2021\/09\/02\/two-decades-later-the-enduring-legacy-of-9-11\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">majority of Americans grew concerned about a terrorist attack<\/a>, even though they were more likely to die in a car accident on the way to the airport. This tendency imbalances the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/happiness-formula\/\">happiness formula<\/a> by distorting our expectations of reality.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>(Shortform note: Experts add that <a href=\"https:\/\/www.psychologytoday.com\/us\/blog\/science-choice\/201410\/how-does-the-anxious-mind-work\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">exaggerating the likelihood and severity of threats causes increased anxiety<\/a>. For instance, those who take symptoms of mild illness to be suggestive of medical catastrophe will likely suffer from anxiety.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>To preempt excessive exaggeration, be wary of blanket terms, like \u201calways,\u201d \u201cnever,\u201d and \u201ccertain.\u201d These words, Gawdat argues, suggest that we might be exaggerating, so they\u2019re worth keeping track of.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>(Shortform note: We\u2019re especially liable to exaggerate when faced with conflict. In particular, experts suggest that <a href=\"https:\/\/www.psychologytoday.com\/us\/blog\/feeling-our-way\/201812\/exaggeration-fuels-conflict\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">we exaggerate to justify our emotions to our adversary<\/a>, which adds fuel to the conflict and becomes the focus, preventing us from resolving the root issue. For example, you might tell your spouse, \u201cYou\u2019re never home on time!\u201d to justify being upset when they\u2019re late for dinner\u2014and instead of apologizing, they might respond by pointing out days when they got home on time.)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>How can exaggerations keep you from being happy? How can you bring your perceptions into better alignment with reality? An exaggeration is a distorted perception of reality. This distortion causes you to have unrealistic expectations. When those expectations aren&#8217;t met, you suffer. Keep reading to discover how exaggerating interferes with your happiness.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":9,"featured_media":86357,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[9],"tags":[828],"class_list":["post-86353","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-psychology","tag-solve-for-happy","","tg-column-two"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v24.3 (Yoast SEO v24.3) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>How a Distorted Perception of Reality Upsets the Formula for Joy - Shortform Books<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"An exaggeration is a distorted perception of reality that can lead to unmet expectations. 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