{"id":82748,"date":"2022-11-02T21:30:00","date_gmt":"2022-11-03T01:30:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=82748"},"modified":"2026-05-07T12:38:32","modified_gmt":"2026-05-07T16:38:32","slug":"emily-oster-potty-training","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/emily-oster-potty-training\/","title":{"rendered":"Emily Oster’s Potty Training & Discipline Advice for Parents"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

What is Emily Oster’s potty training approach? When should you start potty training a child? How should you discipline children during this stage?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Emily Oster is the bestselling author of a series of parenting books offering a data-driven approach to parenting and making decisions as a parent<\/a>. According to her, potty training and discipline are two controversial topics in parenting, but when done correctly, can foster independence<\/a> in children.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Read on for Emily Oster’s potty training and discipline advice for parents<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n

Emily Oster on Potty Training<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Many parents wonder when to start potty training<\/a> their toddler. According to Emily Oster’s potty training research, most U.S. children complete their potty training when they\u2019re between 21 and 30 months old <\/strong>regardless<\/em> of how early they start training. If you start potty training early (when a toddler is one and a half), you\u2019ll use fewer diapers\u2014but the entire process of training will take longer (close to 10 months). If you start potty training later (when a toddler is older than two), you\u2019ll use more diapers\u2014but the process will take less time (close to three months). <\/p>\n\n\n\n

(Shortform note: Aside from Emily Oster’s potty training research, other research on global potty-training practices reveals that many parents outside the U.S. potty train their children earlier than U.S. parents do<\/a>. This research underscores Oster\u2019s overall claim in her book that there isn\u2019t just one<\/em> right way to make parenting decisions, and it adds the perspective that your cultural practices shape how you approach potty training. For instance, most toddlers living in rural China are potty-trained before they\u2019re 24 months old, thanks to the help of pants that feature a split seam at the crotch. These pants make it easier for children to use the toilet because they don\u2019t have to take time to remove their pants.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Parents also wonder what\u2019s the best approach<\/em> to potty training. According to Emily Oster, there\u2019s no research indicating that parent-driven<\/em> approaches to potty training are any more or less effective than child-driven<\/em> approaches. <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Parent-driven approaches such as Oh Crap! Potty Training<\/em><\/a> have you<\/em> dictate the training timeline, such as when to stop using diapers and when to transition your child to the next phase of training. By contrast, child-driven approaches have the child<\/em> indicate when they\u2019re ready to start using the toilet and move through these phases. Given these data, Emily Oster claims that the best you can do is strive for consistency in potty training: Pick an approach and commit to it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(Shortform note: Although research provides no evidence that parent-driven approaches work any better or less than child-driven ones, experts claim that which approach you should choose may depend on your child\u2019s personality<\/a>. For instance, if your child is stubborn, a child-led approach may work best for them. This approach could help prevent your child from resisting your efforts to train them before they\u2019re ready. By contrast, if your child seems eager to please and thrives on praise, a parent-driven approach may help move them through the potty-training process.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Disciplining Your Child<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Aside from Emily Oster’s advice about potty training, she also offers tips for disciplining your child<\/a> in her book Cribsheet<\/em>. According to research, approaches to disciplining your child are most effective when they 1) don\u2019t involve corporal punishment; and 2) use consistent rewards and consequences.<\/strong> Let\u2019s explore these two ideas further:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

No corporal punishment: <\/strong>According to research, there\u2019s no evidence that corporal punishment (such as spanking) improves children\u2019s behavior, and there\u2019s some evidence that it makes their behavior worse.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(Shortform note: Why do parents sometimes resort to corporal punishment, and why does this approach make children\u2019s behavior worse? In No-Drama Discipline<\/em><\/a>, Tina Payne Bryson and Daniel Siegel claim that parents sometimes use corporal punishment when they don\u2019t have another plan for discipline in place.<\/a> In the absence of a go-to plan, parents base their responses to misbehavior on their current emotions and resort to physical force when they feel angry or frustrated. Bryson and Siegel argue that spanking leads children to misbehave more because it makes them feel threatened. This threat activates the primitive parts of their brain rather than the parts that allow them to calm down and correct their behavior.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Consistent rewards and consequences: <\/strong>Approaches such as 1-2-3 Magic<\/em> recognize that when children misbehave, they don\u2019t learn from long discussions about why their misbehavior was bad. Instead, their behavior improves when you reward them or provide them with consequences according to consistent rules. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

For example, imagine you\u2019re trying to teach your child to only run when they\u2019re outside. If you ever catch them running, don\u2019t give them a long speech about how running inside is dangerous. Instead, tell them you\u2019ll be taking away five minutes from their outdoor play time (something they love). Any time<\/em> your child runs indoors, give them this same consequence\u2014even if it feels mean to reduce their outdoor playtime. You can also reward your child<\/a> any day they refrain from running indoors by adding extra outdoor playtime.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(Shortform note: In No-Drama Discipline<\/em><\/a>, Bryson and Siegel argue that understanding why<\/em> your child misbehaves prepares you to deliver consistent consequences in a loving, caring way<\/a>. They suggest that any time your child misbehaves, you should consider what goal or need they were trying to meet. This can help you see things from their perspective, respond more calmly, and implement a consequence that teaches them a lesson without depriving them of their physical or emotional needs.)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

What is Emily Oster’s potty training approach? When should you start potty training a child? How should you discipline children during this stage? Emily Oster is the bestselling author of a series of parenting books offering a data-driven approach to parenting and making decisions as a parent. According to her, potty training and discipline are two controversial topics in parenting, but when done correctly, can foster independence in children. Read on for Emily Oster’s potty training and discipline advice for parents.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":19,"featured_media":82853,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[42,13],"tags":[787],"class_list":["post-82748","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-motivation","category-parenting","tag-cribsheet","","tg-column-two"],"yoast_head":"\nEmily Oster's Potty Training & Discipline Advice for Parents - Shortform Books<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"What's Emily Oster's potty training approach? 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