{"id":80780,"date":"2022-09-30T21:59:00","date_gmt":"2022-10-01T01:59:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=80780"},"modified":"2022-10-13T09:52:27","modified_gmt":"2022-10-13T13:52:27","slug":"how-to-be-more-comfortable-in-social-situations","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-be-more-comfortable-in-social-situations\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Be More Comfortable in Social Situations in Just 3 Steps"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Are you more comfortable in a cafe or a club? When’s the right time\u2014and what’s the right place\u2014to approach someone in a social setting?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Vanessa Van Edwards says that getting people to like you begins with proactively setting the stage before you meet them. She recommends carefully selecting the places and events you attend, where and how you interact with people once you\u2019re there, and the types of people<\/a> you interact with.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Keep reading for Van Edwards’s advice on how to be more comfortable in social situations.<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n

Make Social Situations Work for You<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Once you learn how to be more comfortable in social situations, you’ll project confidence, and people will respond positively. Follow these steps to get that comfort and confidence.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Step 1: Attend Events Where You\u2019ll Feel Most Confident and Comfortable<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Van Edwards recommends making a list of all the settings you love, loathe, and feel okay about<\/strong>, then accept invitations in places you love, reject ones in places you loathe, and take time to consider the ones that are in the locations you feel “okay” in. For example, do you find bars loud and overwhelming? If so, they\u2019re not the place to spend your time if you can avoid them, because you\u2019ll probably be miserable and project a version of yourself that will repel others. Do you love the feel of an intimate coffeehouse? If so, go there, because you\u2019ll feel in your element and will naturally project confidence that will attract others. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Step 2: Position Yourself in the Right Place in the Room<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Once you\u2019ve homed in on the type of settings where you function best, your second step is to increase your odds of having positive interactions with people in them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Van Edwards recommends that you interact with people in the <\/strong>places<\/em><\/strong> and at the <\/strong>times<\/em><\/strong> when they\u2019re most likely to be receptive to conversation<\/strong>. In general, this means approaching people once they\u2019re settled in, not when they\u2019re in transition\u2014for example, arriving at or leaving an event, getting drinks at the bar, or using the bathroom. Van Edwards says the best locations and times to engage with people are: <\/p>\n\n\n\n