{"id":77662,"date":"2022-08-28T19:11:24","date_gmt":"2022-08-28T23:11:24","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=77662"},"modified":"2022-09-05T19:54:55","modified_gmt":"2022-09-05T23:54:55","slug":"inner-child-wounds","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/inner-child-wounds\/","title":{"rendered":"6 Causes of Inner Child Wounds (+Their Effects)"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>What causes you to have inner child wounds and what are the effects? How can you identify your own inner child wounds?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Psychologist Nicole LePera argues that, whenever your parents made you feel unloved and insecure, you felt extreme pain and discomfort. Since you hadn\u2019t yet developed the emotional skills to cope with your inner turmoil, you formed damaging inner child wounds.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Keep reading to learn the six causes and effects of inner child wounds, according to LePera.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<!--more-->\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-reflect-on-inner-child-wounds-and-where-they-came-from\">Reflect on Inner Child Wounds and Where They Came From<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Reflecting on <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/your-inner-child\/\">your inner child<\/a> wounds will help determine the origin of the thoughts, emotions, and behaviors that underlie the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/self-sabotaging-habits-2\/\">self-sabotaging patterns<\/a> you learned during childhood.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>LePera argues that parents trigger inner child wounds by practicing at least one of six different behaviors. Therefore, you can identify the experiences that lie at the root of your self-sabotaging patterns by <strong>reflecting on how you felt and reacted if your parents engaged in any of the following behaviors<\/strong>:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">1: Invalidated Your Feelings<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>For example, you told them your worries about something and they told you to get over it. This made you feel as if your feelings didn\u2019t matter. The inner child wound that formed as a result caused you to begin dismissing your feelings and stopped expressing them to others.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">2: Ignored You, Making You Work for Attention<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>For example, your mother was too focused on her <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/gtd-to-do-list\/\">to-do list<\/a> to acknowledge your presence. You felt unwanted, and you forced her to give you attention by behaving in ways that provoked her anger.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">3: Pushed You to Be Who They Wanted<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>For example, your parents frequently berated you for not being as good a student as your sibling. You felt like they didn\u2019t care about <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/what-are-you-curious-about\/\">your interests<\/a>, resulting in an inner child wound. You resented having to try so hard to please them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">4: Violated Your Personal Space or Privacy<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>For example, your father listened in on your conversations with friends. You resented him for invading your privacy, felt stifled, and found it difficult to trust others. &nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">5: Fixated on How You Appeared to Others<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>For example, your parents criticized you for being overweight and restricted your diet\u2014this forms an inner child wound focused on your <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/self-image-psychology\/\">self-perception<\/a>. You felt ashamed of your appearance, resented your parents for not loving you as you were, and sought comfort in binge-eating.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">6: Failed to Healthily Express Their Emotions<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>For example, your mother flew into a violent rage each time you disappointed her. After each outburst, she would refuse to talk to you for a few days. The inner child wound that formed caused you to feel unsafe and unloved. You didn\u2019t know what you could do to appease her, withdrawing into yourself and avoiding any unnecessary interactions with her.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>What causes you to have inner child wounds and what are the effects? How can you identify your own inner child wounds? Psychologist Nicole LePera argues that, whenever your parents made you feel unloved and insecure, you felt extreme pain and discomfort. Since you hadn\u2019t yet developed the emotional skills to cope with your inner turmoil, you formed damaging inner child wounds. Keep reading to learn the six causes and effects of inner child wounds, according to LePera.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":19,"featured_media":77710,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[9,12],"tags":[734],"class_list":["post-77662","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-psychology","category-relationships","tag-how-to-do-the-work","","tg-column-two"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v24.3 (Yoast SEO v24.3) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>6 Causes of Inner Child Wounds (+Their Effects) - Shortform Books<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"What causes inner child wounds? What are the effects? Psychologist LePera explains the six reasons you have emotional wounds from childhood.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/inner-child-wounds\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"6 Causes of Inner Child Wounds (+Their Effects)\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"What causes inner child wounds? What are the effects? Psychologist LePera explains the six reasons you have emotional wounds from childhood.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/inner-child-wounds\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Shortform Books\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2022-08-28T23:11:24+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2022-09-05T23:54:55+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/s3.amazonaws.com\/wordpress.shortform.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/sad-crying-child-hands-on-face.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1846\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"1232\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Emily Kitazawa\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Emily Kitazawa\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"3 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/inner-child-wounds\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/inner-child-wounds\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Emily Kitazawa\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/e094024454c7d3334a149c0cf039bdeb\"},\"headline\":\"6 Causes of Inner Child Wounds (+Their Effects)\",\"datePublished\":\"2022-08-28T23:11:24+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2022-09-05T23:54:55+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/inner-child-wounds\/\"},\"wordCount\":470,\"commentCount\":0,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/#organization\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/inner-child-wounds\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/sad-crying-child-hands-on-face.jpg\",\"keywords\":[\"How to Do the Work\"],\"articleSection\":[\"Psychology\",\"Relationships\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/inner-child-wounds\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/inner-child-wounds\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/inner-child-wounds\/\",\"name\":\"6 Causes of Inner Child Wounds (+Their Effects) - Shortform Books\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/inner-child-wounds\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/inner-child-wounds\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/sad-crying-child-hands-on-face.jpg\",\"datePublished\":\"2022-08-28T23:11:24+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2022-09-05T23:54:55+00:00\",\"description\":\"What causes inner child wounds? 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