{"id":77333,"date":"2022-08-30T13:32:35","date_gmt":"2022-08-30T17:32:35","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=77333"},"modified":"2025-04-22T14:40:05","modified_gmt":"2025-04-22T18:40:05","slug":"how-to-do-the-work-dr-nicole-lepera","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-do-the-work-dr-nicole-lepera\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Do the Work by Dr. Nicole LePera: Overview"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Looking for an overview of How to Do the Work<\/a>, Dr. Nicole LePera’s bestselling book? What is LePera’s most important advice from the book?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

According to LePera’s How to Do the Work<\/em>, many people engage in self-sabotaging patterns<\/a> that prevent them from being happy. Despite their efforts to change, they end up reverting to their unwanted behaviors and feel powerless to adopt healthier patterns.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Keep reading for a three-part overview of How to Do the Work<\/em> by Dr. Nicole LePera.<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n

Overview: How to Do the Work<\/em> by Dr. Nicole LePera<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

According to Nicole LePera, bestselling author of How to Do the Work<\/em>, self-sabotaging patterns create recurring problems that prevent people from feeling happy. These patterns can include irrational emotional reactions and damaging behaviors such as chronic worrying<\/a>, outbursts fueled by insecurities or anger, and self-destructive habits\u2014for example, procrastinating or overeating<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Since these sorts of patterns create undesirable symptoms, it\u2019s important to overcome them and adopt more positive patterns. However, many people fail to make the changes they want. As a result, they feel like they must accept their patterns as an unchangeable part of who they are.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(Shortform note: Psychologists add insight into what self-sabotaging patterns are and why people might fail to overcome them. You\u2019re self-sabotaging when you engage in behaviors that thwart your goals\u2014for example, wanting to be in a committed relationship but cheating on your partner. Every failed attempt to move toward your goal makes you believe that you can\u2019t<\/em> or shouldn\u2019t<\/em> achieve your goal. And this belief reinforces your self-defeating behaviors. <\/a>For example, cheating on your partner makes you feel guilty. Your guilt convinces you that you don\u2019t deserve to be in a relationship. Even though you want <\/em>a relationship, believing that you don\u2019t deserve <\/em>to be in one discourages you from changing your behavior<\/a>.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

LePera argues that you can take control of patterns that don\u2019t serve you and live a healthier, happier life<\/strong>. According to her, self-sabotaging patterns stem from unresolved childhood traumatic experiences. Therefore, the key to adopting more positive patterns lies in identifying and healing painful childhood experiences.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Part 1: Self-Sabotaging Patterns & Childhood Trauma<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

To begin, Dr. Nicole LePera’s How to Do the Work<\/em> explains how your childhood experiences led you to subconsciously adopt self-sabotaging patterns<\/strong>. It also examines why it\u2019s difficult to change unwanted patterns. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

According to LePera, before you can overcome your self-sabotaging patterns, you first need to understand why you engage in them. This knowledge will empower you to take control of your unwanted behaviors. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

(Shortform note: Like LePera, James Allen (As A Man Thinketh<\/em><\/a>) argues that you must understand why<\/em> you behave the way you do before you can change your behaviors<\/a>. Without this understanding, you\u2019re more likely to believe that you have no control over the way you act, and you won\u2019t feel motivated to improve your behaviors.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

LePera argues that the reason it\u2019s difficult to overcome self-sabotaging patterns is that you never consciously chose to engage in these patterns<\/strong>. Rather, you subconsciously adopted them as a way to cope with painful childhood experiences that made you feel unsafe or unloved.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Part 2: Childhood Patterns & Negative Effects<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Next in How to Do the Work<\/em>, Dr. Nicole LePera explores how automatically engaging in childhood patterns negatively affects your emotions, your relationships, and your mental and physical health<\/strong>. This knowledge will help clarify why it\u2019s so important to become conscious of and replace the childhood patterns that don\u2019t serve you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

According to LePera, automatically engaging in defensive childhood patterns creates three negative effects: <\/p>\n\n\n\n

  1. You don\u2019t know how to recognize and fulfill your needs. <\/li>
  2. You unintentionally replicate childhood relationships.<\/li>
  3. You suffer from elevated stress levels that damage your health.<\/li><\/ol>\n\n\n\n

    Part 3: Replace Unwanted Childhood Patterns<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

    The final section of Dr. Nicole LePera’s How to Do the Work <\/em>focuses on replacing defensive childhood patterns with healthier ones.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    LePera argues that the most effective way to overcome defensive childhood patterns is to consciously address the childhood experiences that caused you pain. According to her, the reason your defensive patterns hold so much sway over you is that you\u2019re still using them to avoid feeling your childhood pain<\/strong>. And, because you didn\u2019t consciously feel and process these painful emotions, they continue to live within your subconscious mind<\/a> and influence all your behaviors. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Therefore, she suggests that you revisit the childhood beliefs and experiences that instigated your defensive patterns, acknowledge how they impact your current patterns, and create new beliefs that support healthier patterns. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

    (Shortform note: Tony Robbins (Awaken the Giant Within<\/em><\/a>) expands on what LePera says here by claiming that the more you attempt to avoid painful emotions, the more likely you are to engage in behaviors that exacerbate your emotional pain<\/strong><\/a>. These behaviors include shunning situations that might trigger painful emotions\u2014which means you miss out on experiencing positive emotions that these situations might elicit, and pretending not to feel your emotions\u2014which means painful emotions become increasingly intense and eventually lead to irrational outbursts. Like LePera, he suggests that you can process your painful emotions <\/a>and relieve your discomfort by acknowledging and accepting where these feelings came from.)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    Looking for an overview of How to Do the Work, Dr. Nicole LePera’s bestselling book? What is LePera’s most important advice from the book? According to LePera’s How to Do the Work, many people engage in self-sabotaging patterns that prevent them from being happy. Despite their efforts to change, they end up reverting to their unwanted behaviors and feel powerless to adopt healthier patterns. Keep reading for a three-part overview of How to Do the Work by Dr. Nicole LePera.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":19,"featured_media":77440,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[40,9],"tags":[734],"class_list":["post-77333","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-books","category-psychology","tag-how-to-do-the-work","","tg-column-two"],"yoast_head":"\nHow to Do the Work by Dr. Nicole LePera: Overview - Shortform Books<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Want an overview of Dr. Nicole LePera's How to Do the Work? 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