{"id":76303,"date":"2022-08-23T13:52:00","date_gmt":"2022-08-23T17:52:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=76303"},"modified":"2022-08-24T10:40:28","modified_gmt":"2022-08-24T14:40:28","slug":"procrastination-habit","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/procrastination-habit\/","title":{"rendered":"Beating the Procrastination Habit With Positive Self-Talk"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>Are you a chronic procrastinator? How does anxiety feed your <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/habit-of-procrastination\/\">procrastination habit<\/a> by making you dread work? <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>According to Neil Fiore, the author of <em>The Now Habit<\/em>, procrastination results from anxiety about work. Once we procrastinate, we typically feel bad and tell ourselves we\u2019re lazy. That <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/stop-negative-self-talk\/\">negative self-talk<\/a> creates more anxiety, which, in turn, only makes it harder to get back to work by creating even more pressure.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Here&#8217;s how to beat your procrastination habit with <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/importance-of-positive-self-talk\/\">positive self-talk<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<!--more-->\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-positive-self-talk-for-procrastination\"><strong>Positive Self-Talk for Procrastination<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>One way to change how you think about work in order to beat the procrastination habit is to change your self-talk. Fiore argues that procrastinators typically talk to themselves in \u201chave to\u201d and \u201cshould\u201d statements\u2014both of which only build negative feelings that then lead to procrastination. According to Fiore, <strong>if you tell yourself you \u201chave to\u201d do something, you make yourself a powerless victim of circumstance<\/strong> because you feel like other people or external circumstances are coercing you to do whatever it is. This causes undue stress, pressure, and resentment.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>(Shortform note: One way to overcome \u201chave to\u201d thinking is to <a href=\"https:\/\/shortform.com\/app\/book\/lost-connections\/chapter-5#disconnection-from-intrinsic-motivation\">focus on intrinsic rather than extrinsic motivation<\/a>. In <a href=\"https:\/\/shortform.com\/app\/book\/lost-connections\/\"><em>Lost Connections<\/em><\/a>, Johann Hari explains that extrinsic motivation means treating an action as a means to an end whereas <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/intrinsic-motivation-psychology\/\">intrinsic motivation<\/a> involves enjoying an action for its own sake. For example, extrinsic motivation is running a mile because you\u2019re trying to lose weight. Intrinsic motivation is running a mile because you enjoy running. In the former case, you\u2019re more likely to feel like you \u201chave to\u201d go for a run, whereas in the latter case running is something you <em>choose <\/em>to do.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Likewise, <strong>if you tell yourself you \u201cshould\u201d do something, you make that thing into a moral issue\u2014you\u2019re a bad person if you don\u2019t do it<\/strong>. If you tell yourself that things \u201cshould\u201d be different than they are, you start to think that the world is bad and unfair. And if you tell yourself you \u201cshould\u201d be more like someone else, you devalue yourself and define yourself as inadequate. In short, Fiore says that \u201cshould\u201d statements lead to depression that saps your energy and motivation to work.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-table\"><table><tbody><tr><td><strong>Valid and Invalid \u201cShould\u201d Statements<\/strong><br><br>To help identify distorted \u201cshould\u201d statements, psychologist David Burns argues that there are <a href=\"https:\/\/feelinggood.com\/2017\/01\/05\/should-statements-is-there-a-moral-ethical-dimension\/\">only three valid uses of the word \u201cshould\u201d<\/a>:<br><br>&#8211; <strong>Legal \u201cshoulds\u201d<\/strong> in situations where an action is forbidden by law. For example, \u201cYou shouldn\u2019t speed on the highway because you\u2019ll get a ticket.\u201d<br><br>&#8211; <strong>Laws of the universe \u201cshoulds\u201d<\/strong> that express the certainty of an outcome. For example, \u201cIf I drop this pen, it should fall on the floor.\u201d<br><br>&#8211; <strong>Moral and ethical \u201cshoulds\u201d<\/strong> that name ethically permissible or impermissible behavior. For example, \u201cYou shouldn\u2019t steal because it\u2019s wrong.\u201d<br><br>Obviously, there\u2019s room for interpretation when it comes to ethics, as not everyone shares the same moral code. But most of the time, Burns suggests, we attribute this moral meaning to things that aren\u2019t really moral issues. For this reason, if you find yourself thinking that you \u201cshould\u201d or \u201cshouldn\u2019t\u201d do something, Burns suggests interrogating whether the statement meets any of the three categories. If not, he says, it\u2019s distorted thinking.&nbsp;<\/td><\/tr><\/tbody><\/table><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p>The answer to these problems, Fiore says, is to change your self-talk to emphasize choice and agency. In other words, <strong>instead of telling yourself you \u201chave to\u201d or \u201cshould\u201d do things, tell yourself you \u201cchoose to\u201d or \u201cwant to\u201d do things<\/strong>. Doing so, Fiore says, removes the unnecessary stress and judgment and puts the emphasis on your wants and your agency.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>(Shortform note: Fiore\u2019s suggestion is an example of <a href=\"https:\/\/www.verywellmind.com\/reframing-defined-2610419\">cognitive reframing<\/a>, a technique whereby you <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/change-your-mindset\/\">change your mindset<\/a> by finding alternative ways of thinking and talking about a situation. The technique is commonly used when treating a wide range of mood disorders, as it typically requires you to look for a more positive or helpful spin on a situation.)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Are you a chronic procrastinator? How does anxiety feed your procrastination habit by making you dread work? According to Neil Fiore, the author of The Now Habit, procrastination results from anxiety about work. Once we procrastinate, we typically feel bad and tell ourselves we\u2019re lazy. That negative self-talk creates more anxiety, which, in turn, only makes it harder to get back to work by creating even more pressure. Here&#8217;s how to beat your procrastination habit with positive self-talk.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":7,"featured_media":59467,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[7,9,43],"tags":[722],"class_list":["post-76303","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-lifestyle","category-psychology","category-self-improvement","tag-the-now-habit","","tg-column-two"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v24.3 (Yoast SEO v24.3) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Beating the Procrastination Habit With Positive Self-Talk - Shortform Books<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Habitual procrastinators talk to themselves in \u201chave to\u201d and \u201cshould\u201d statements. Instead, tell yourself you &quot;choose&quot; or &quot;want&quot; to do it.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/procrastination-habit\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Beating the Procrastination Habit With Positive Self-Talk\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Habitual procrastinators talk to themselves in \u201chave to\u201d and \u201cshould\u201d statements. Instead, tell yourself you &quot;choose&quot; or &quot;want&quot; to do it.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/procrastination-habit\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Shortform Books\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2022-08-23T17:52:00+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2022-08-24T14:40:28+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/s3.amazonaws.com\/wordpress.shortform.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/01\/how-to-have-a-positive-attitude.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"750\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"374\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Darya Sinusoid\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Darya Sinusoid\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"3 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/procrastination-habit\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/procrastination-habit\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Darya Sinusoid\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/0421cce75bc249b11e2517b3a91f9c46\"},\"headline\":\"Beating the Procrastination Habit With Positive Self-Talk\",\"datePublished\":\"2022-08-23T17:52:00+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2022-08-24T14:40:28+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/procrastination-habit\/\"},\"wordCount\":673,\"commentCount\":0,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/#organization\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/procrastination-habit\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/01\/how-to-have-a-positive-attitude.jpg\",\"keywords\":[\"The Now Habit\"],\"articleSection\":[\"Lifestyle\",\"Psychology\",\"Self-Improvement\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/procrastination-habit\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/procrastination-habit\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/procrastination-habit\/\",\"name\":\"Beating the Procrastination Habit With Positive Self-Talk - Shortform Books\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/procrastination-habit\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/procrastination-habit\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/01\/how-to-have-a-positive-attitude.jpg\",\"datePublished\":\"2022-08-23T17:52:00+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2022-08-24T14:40:28+00:00\",\"description\":\"Habitual procrastinators talk to themselves in \u201chave to\u201d and \u201cshould\u201d statements. 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