{"id":71582,"date":"2022-07-05T17:43:00","date_gmt":"2022-07-05T21:43:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=71582"},"modified":"2022-07-19T09:24:20","modified_gmt":"2022-07-19T13:24:20","slug":"where-do-thoughts-come-from","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/where-do-thoughts-come-from\/","title":{"rendered":"Where Do Thoughts Come From?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>Where do thoughts come from? Why do you think about the world the way you do? Are your beliefs and opinions actually your own? <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>While you might believe that you consciously <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/control-your-thoughts\/\">control your thoughts<\/a>, you\u2019re often not conscious of your thoughts or why you think them. This is because you never consciously chose the thoughts you habitually think or the beliefs that reinforce them. Rather, you subconsciously adopted the thoughts and beliefs of your family, your friends, and your culture.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Here&#8217;s why you don\u2019t have complete autonomy over the way you think and how this impacts the way you interpret your experiences, how you experience happiness, and how you judge yourself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<!--more-->\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-you-subconsciously-think-like-others-to-feel-happy\"><strong>You Subconsciously Think Like Others To Feel Happy<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>In the course of our lifetime (particularly, childhood), you adopt the thoughts and beliefs about the world from other people. These adopted thoughts and beliefs influence your entire worldview\u2014how you judge the world, your place in it, and the circumstances you face. In other words, everything you\u2019ve ever thought of as good, bad, right, wrong, beautiful, or ugly has simply been a reflection of the way other people have influenced you.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Why would you adopt the thoughts of those around you? According to Wiest, you likely found early on in life that it was the only way you could experience comfort and happiness. She explains that, as a child, your comfort and happiness depended on conforming to the expectations of other people:&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\"><li>If you acted according to their desires and expectations, you were rewarded\u2014for example, with extra attention and affection. This made you feel comfortable and happy.&nbsp;<\/li><li>If you acted against their desires and expectations, you were punished\u2014for example, with rejection or <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/social-humiliation\/\">social humiliation<\/a>. This made you feel uncomfortable and unhappy.<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p>(Shortform note: Researchers confirm that we unconsciously internalize the unspoken rules and biases of our social groups so that we can instinctively cooperate with others. <a href=\"https:\/\/www.sciencedaily.com\/releases\/2017\/05\/170523083301.htm\">Our inherent need to feel connected to others and to avoid punishment motivates us to adopt these rules<\/a>. In addition, <strong>this need for connection encourages us to spend time with people who are similar to us<\/strong>\u2014the feeling of sameness enhances our <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/create-a-sense-of-belonging\/\">sense of belonging<\/a>. However, being around like-minded people makes it difficult to think differently\u2014because surrounding ourselves with people who believe the same things we\u2019ve been <em>conditioned<\/em> to believe reinforces our thinking patterns.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-table\"><table><tbody><tr><td><strong>Where Do Thoughts Come from?<\/strong><br><br>The author of <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/app\/book\/psycho-cybernetics\"><em>Psycho-Cybernetics<\/em><\/a>, Maxwell Maltz, validates Wiest\u2019s argument that you\u2019ve been conditioned to adopt the thoughts and beliefs of those around you. He argues that, as a child, <em>you unconsciously adopted the opinions and beliefs of others as <\/em><strong><em>truths<\/em><\/strong>, regardless of whether or not these opinions were based on facts.&nbsp;<br><br>Why did your mind accept what you heard, saw, and experienced as truth? Because your nervous system can\u2019t tell the difference between imagination and reality\u2014it can only respond to what you think or imagine to be true. When you were young, you were less able to question what was going on around you and form your own rational conclusions. As a result, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/app\/book\/psycho-cybernetics\/chapter-2#what-influences-your-self-image\">you simply absorbed everything you experienced, and <em>your mind accepted these experiences as truths<\/em><\/a>.&nbsp;<br><br>Further, Maltz suggests that the conditioning process isn\u2019t as simple as Wiest makes it out to be. He argues that you didn\u2019t automatically adopt the thoughts that helped you to conform to other people\u2019s expectations. Rather,<strong> <\/strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/app\/book\/psycho-cybernetics\/chapter-2#what-is-your-self-image\"><strong>the way that you <em>identified<\/em> with your experiences determined the way you thought about and interpreted similar experiences<\/strong><\/a>.<br><br>For example, if your teacher gave you a gold star and a smile in front of all of your peers, you could have identified with this experience in multiple ways: If you were a <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/building-confidence-in-your-child\/\">confident child<\/a>, you could have felt proud of yourself and your achievement (happy). If you lacked confidence, you could have felt embarrassed about being the center of attention (unhappy). If you wanted to impress a peer who took pride in being a delinquent, you could have felt disappointment about looking like a geek (unhappy). Though your teacher was obviously happy with you, <strong>only the way you identified with the experience defined how happy <em>you<\/em> felt about it<\/strong>.<br><br><strong>As an adult, you can decide what you choose to believe <\/strong>but, according to Maltz, the \u201ctruths\u201d you accepted as a child continue to live in your mind and inform your <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/thoughts-feelings-and-behaviors\/\">thoughts and feelings<\/a>. He suggests that you take control of these outdated truths and replace them with what you <em>choose to believe<\/em> by regularly visualizing yourself acting in ways that align with your authentic self (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/your-genius\/\">who you are<\/a> beneath the conditioning). Maltz claims that, with constant practice, your mind will gradually become accustomed to accepting your new thoughts and beliefs as <em>truth<\/em> and will let go of the old, conditioned beliefs.<\/td><\/tr><\/tbody><\/table><\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Where do thoughts come from? Why do you think about the world the way you do? Are your beliefs and opinions actually your own? While you might believe that you consciously control your thoughts, you\u2019re often not conscious of your thoughts or why you think them. This is because you never consciously chose the thoughts you habitually think or the beliefs that reinforce them. Rather, you subconsciously adopted the thoughts and beliefs of your family, your friends, and your culture.&nbsp; Here&#8217;s why you don\u2019t have complete autonomy over the way you think and how this impacts the way you interpret<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":7,"featured_media":26744,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[9,43],"tags":[676],"class_list":["post-71582","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-psychology","category-self-improvement","tag-101-essays-that-will-change-the-way-you-think","","tg-column-two"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v24.3 (Yoast SEO v24.3) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Where Do Thoughts Come From? - Shortform Books<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Where do your thoughts come from? 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