{"id":59308,"date":"2022-01-24T11:08:00","date_gmt":"2022-01-24T15:08:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=59308"},"modified":"2022-01-31T11:46:36","modified_gmt":"2022-01-31T15:46:36","slug":"lasting-happiness","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/lasting-happiness\/","title":{"rendered":"The 3 Steps for Cultivating Lasting Happiness"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>Is it possible to find lasting happiness? Can true lasting happiness be found externally? <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Lasting happiness is a mindset you build and isn\u2019t contingent upon external characteristics, like wealth or status. Such factors can\u2019t confer lasting happiness. You see this in daily life: when something great happens, like a promotion, you\u2019re temporarily elated but soon return to your normal level of contentment. Similarly, if you suffer a setback, like a breakup, the negative feelings wear off.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Here is why lasting happiness is a mindset that requires deliberate effort to cultivate. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<!--more-->\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-cultivating-a-happiness-mindset\"><strong>Cultivating a Happiness Mindset&nbsp;<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Happiness that is based on external events (e.g. promotion) is fragile because of the phenomenon called &#8220;hedonic adaptation&#8221;\u2014when positive or negative emotions wear off, they have a less pronounced effect on mood, and mood returns more quickly to the baseline. If you keep getting promoted, for instance, the promotions will leave you less happy for less time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>According to the Dalai Lama, lasting happiness is not contingent on external factors\u2014it&#8217;s a mindset. The Dalai Lama warns that <strong>cultivating a happiness mindset takes time and experimentation<\/strong>. But, adds Cutler, it\u2019s not impossible: Your brain is malleable, and you can rewire it to elevate your general level of happiness.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>(Shortform note: Beyond having malleable\u2014what\u2019s referred to in neuroscience as \u201cplastic\u201d\u2014brains, you can <em>enhance<\/em> the plasticity of your brain <a href=\"https:\/\/www.verywellmind.com\/what-is-brain-plasticity-2794886\">by learning new skills<\/a>, getting plenty of high-quality sleep, and exercising regularly.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-cultivate-a-happiness-mindset-in-3-steps\"><strong>Cultivate a Happiness Mindset in 3 Steps<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>The Dalai Lama believes there are three steps to cultivating a happiness mindset: <strong>education, development of motivation, and exertion<\/strong>. We\u2019ll look at each step in the next three chapters.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>(Shortform note: Other parts of Buddhist teachings are separated into three steps comparable to the ones outlined by the Dalai Lama here. The Threefold Way, for instance, consists of first <a href=\"https:\/\/www.lionsroar.com\/what-is-the-threefold-training\/\">establishing self-discipline (or ethics), then concentration (or meditation), and finally, wisdom<\/a>.)&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-step-1-educate-yourself\"><strong>Step 1: Educate Yourself<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p>To cultivate your happiness mindset, educate yourself both about your emotions and the circumstances that give rise to them, counsels the Dalai Lama. By doing this, <strong>you root out the <\/strong><strong><em>misunderstandings of the world<\/em><\/strong><strong> that lead to <\/strong><strong><em>negative emotions<\/em><\/strong><strong> and therefore <\/strong><strong><em>unhappiness<\/em><\/strong>.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>To perform this educational self-analysis, think about when you\u2019re happy and unhappy. Then, consider the feelings that led to your happiness or unhappiness. You\u2019ll find that feelings like anger and hatred make you unhappy and hurt you and others, says the Dalai Lama. Because they\u2019re hurtful, you\u2019ll know these are <em>negative emotions<\/em> and that they\u2019re based on a <em>misunderstanding<\/em> of the world.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-step-2-develop-your-motivation-to-change\"><strong>Step 2: Develop Your Motivation to Change<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p>After educating yourself on how and why you become happy or unhappy, the next step of cultivating a happiness mindset is to <strong>develop your <\/strong><strong><em>motivation<\/em><\/strong><strong> to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/change-your-mindset\/\">change your mindset<\/a><\/strong>, advises the Dalai Lama.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Simply <em>understanding<\/em> what makes you unhappy can\u2019t alone eradicate unhappiness, claims the Dalai Lama. <strong>You must <\/strong><strong><em>desire<\/em><\/strong><strong> to rid yourself of unhappiness and negative emotions<\/strong>.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>(Shortform note: Cutler and the Dalai Lama tell you to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-inspire-yourself\/\">motivate yourself<\/a> to change but don\u2019t provide tools for doing so. One way to cultivate motivation is to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.forbes.com\/sites\/jennifercohen\/2013\/11\/06\/motivation-is-a-muscle-the-7-best-ways-to-substantially-increase-your-productivity\/?sh=56b3d02d11c5\">write down the goals you hope to achieve<\/a>\u2014for instance, to rid yourself of ignorance. Achieving enlightenment is a long and winding path, but by writing down your goals, you help yourself stay on that path.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-step-3-exert-yourself-to-change\"><strong>Step 3: Exert Yourself to Change<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p>Now that you\u2019ve developed the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/motivation-to-change\/\">motivation to change<\/a> your mindset, the final step of cultivating a happiness mindset is to <strong>make the <\/strong><strong><em>effort<\/em><\/strong><strong> to change<\/strong>, says the Dalai Lama. We\u2019ll discuss two strategies to make that effort.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>(Shortform note: This chapter falls within the Right Effort step of the Noble Eightfold Path because the following strategies <a href=\"https:\/\/www.bbc.co.uk\/bitesize\/guides\/zf8g4qt\/revision\/3\">concern altering your <em>thinking<\/em><\/a>\u2014not, as you might think, your <em>actions<\/em>. In the book, Cutler and the Dalai Lama spend the most time on the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/eckhart-tolle-meditation-mindfulness\/\">Meditation<\/a> and Wisdom parts of The Threefold Way, and little time on the Ethics part, which concerns behavior, speech, and livelihood.)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Is it possible to find lasting happiness? Can true lasting happiness be found externally? Lasting happiness is a mindset you build and isn\u2019t contingent upon external characteristics, like wealth or status. Such factors can\u2019t confer lasting happiness. You see this in daily life: when something great happens, like a promotion, you\u2019re temporarily elated but soon return to your normal level of contentment. Similarly, if you suffer a setback, like a breakup, the negative feelings wear off.\u00a0 Here is why lasting happiness is a mindset that requires deliberate effort to cultivate.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":7,"featured_media":668,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[9,43],"tags":[571],"class_list":["post-59308","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-psychology","category-self-improvement","tag-the-art-of-happiness","","tg-column-two"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v24.3 (Yoast SEO v24.3) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>The 3 Steps for Cultivating Lasting Happiness - Shortform Books<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Lasting happiness is not contingent on external factors\u2014it&#039;s a mindset. 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Here&#039;s how to cultivate the mindset conducive to lasting happiness.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/lasting-happiness\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Shortform Books\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2022-01-24T15:08:00+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2022-01-31T15:46:36+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/power-of-now-true-self.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"720\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"384\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Darya Sinusoid\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Darya Sinusoid\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"3 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/lasting-happiness\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/lasting-happiness\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Darya Sinusoid\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/0421cce75bc249b11e2517b3a91f9c46\"},\"headline\":\"The 3 Steps for Cultivating Lasting Happiness\",\"datePublished\":\"2022-01-24T15:08:00+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2022-01-31T15:46:36+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/lasting-happiness\/\"},\"wordCount\":684,\"commentCount\":0,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/#organization\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/lasting-happiness\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/power-of-now-true-self.jpg\",\"keywords\":[\"The Art of Happiness\"],\"articleSection\":[\"Psychology\",\"Self-Improvement\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/lasting-happiness\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/lasting-happiness\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/lasting-happiness\/\",\"name\":\"The 3 Steps for Cultivating Lasting Happiness - Shortform Books\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/lasting-happiness\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/lasting-happiness\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/power-of-now-true-self.jpg\",\"datePublished\":\"2022-01-24T15:08:00+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2022-01-31T15:46:36+00:00\",\"description\":\"Lasting happiness is not contingent on external factors\u2014it's a mindset. 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