{"id":58520,"date":"2022-01-18T12:18:00","date_gmt":"2022-01-18T16:18:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=58520"},"modified":"2022-01-18T16:50:32","modified_gmt":"2022-01-18T20:50:32","slug":"being-unhappy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/being-unhappy\/","title":{"rendered":"There Is Nothing Wrong With Being Unhappy"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Are humans meant to be happy? What’s wrong with treating happiness as the norm and unhappiness as a problem? <\/p>\n\n\n\n

There is a tacit assumption in our society that humans are meant to be happy. One consequence of this idea is that there is something wrong with being unhappy or experiencing psychological distress. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Here is why there is nothing wrong with being unhappy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n

The Happiness Myth<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

The idea that humans are meant to be happy suggests something is wrong with anyone who is unhappy or experiences psychological distress. We may characterize an unhappy person as \u201cweak.\u201d This is the underlying premise when one person tells another to \u201ctoughen up,\u201d as though emotions were a kind of threat that can simply be faced down and defeated (and happiness floods into the gap left by the banished emotion, says the myth). <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Social media reinforces this idea by providing a platform where people can display only the best parts of their lives, which give the impression of maximum happiness. It\u2019s easy to look at these projections of other people\u2019s happiness and feel that your life doesn\u2019t measure up. Some people then conclude that there must be something wrong with them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

However, because humans are not, in fact, naturally happy, there\u2019s nothing inherently wrong with being unhappy. <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Happiness\u2014and Unhappiness\u2014Are Essential to Motivation  <\/strong>

Although many scientists agree that the human brain is not wired to be consistently happy<\/a>, happiness does play an important role in human motivation. A 1950s study, researchers implanted electrodes in rats\u2019 brains that allowed the animals to push a lever and get a pulse of stimulation to their brains\u2019 pleasure centers. The rats became so obsessed with the pleasure stimulation<\/a> that they didn\u2019t pause to eat, drink, or sleep. The dopamine hits that fueled the rats\u2019 obsession also feed drug addiction. 

The brain is wired to get these dopamine bursts from external rewards<\/a>\u2014like money and material goods\u2014more than intrinsic rewards, like contentment. The catch: The dopamine surge from external rewards is more short-lived, creating the unhappiness<\/em> that motivates us to pursue more happiness. Evolutionary psychologists argue that this unhappiness was key to our ancient ancestors\u2019 survival because it helped them remain vigilant to threats and motivated to continually progress. <\/td><\/tr><\/tbody><\/table><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

The Harms of Treating Unhappiness as a Problem<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Research has shown that this idea\u2014that being unhappy means that there\u2019s something wrong with you\u2014is misguided. Furthermore, actually treating your negative thoughts and feelings<\/a> as a problem can create secondary emotions<\/a>, such as shame and guilt, that intensify your psychological suffering.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Despite this, modern psychologists consider some typical signs of unhappiness when diagnosing psychiatric disorders. For instance, symptoms of depression<\/a> include feelings of sadness, angry outbursts, and anxiety. In order to diagnose an individual with depression, these symptoms have to be so overwhelming that they affect the individual\u2019s ability to function in society\u2014but even for individuals without diagnosed depression, these symptoms are pathologized (or linked to mental illness) and regarded as potentially problematic. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

On the other hand, some experts argue that depression is an evolutionary adaptation<\/a> meant to trigger social support, among other purposes. According to this hypothesis, diagnosing and treating depression does not worsen the problem\u2014rather, those are modern forms of help that depressive symptoms exist to elicit.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Are humans meant to be happy? What’s wrong with treating happiness as the norm and unhappiness as a problem? There is a tacit assumption in our society that humans are meant to be happy. One consequence of this idea is that there is something wrong with being unhappy or experiencing psychological distress. Here is why there is nothing wrong with being unhappy.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":7,"featured_media":27637,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[9,24],"tags":[565],"class_list":["post-58520","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-psychology","category-society","tag-the-happiness-trap","","tg-column-two"],"yoast_head":"\nThere Is Nothing Wrong With Being Unhappy - Shortform Books<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"There is a tacit assumption in our society that humans are meant to be happy. 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