{"id":52252,"date":"2021-10-28T10:58:45","date_gmt":"2021-10-28T14:58:45","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=52252"},"modified":"2021-11-04T13:05:36","modified_gmt":"2021-11-04T17:05:36","slug":"how-to-ask-someone-on-a-date","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-ask-someone-on-a-date\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Ask Someone Out on a Date"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Want advice on how to ask someone on a date? What do you do if you get turned down?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Asking someone on a date can be nerve-wracking\u2014especially when you’re afraid of being turned down. Additionally, when planning the date, you should always provide full details rather than trying to surprise them and pick an activity where you can converse in a casual environment.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Here are more tips from The Fine Art of Small Talk<\/em> on how to ask someone out.<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n

How to Ask Them Out<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

The purpose of dating, according to Fine, is to learn about each other, discover what it\u2019s like to be around each other, and enjoy each other\u2019s company. In short, you want to know if this is a person you\u2019d enjoy spending some greater portion of your life with. As such, Fine says, plan dates that maximize your ability to interact, converse, and connect. <\/strong>Before you ask someone out, Fine recommends thinking of a few casual dates\u2014activities you\u2019d enjoy engaging in with a friend. Be prepared to provide the full details up front.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(Shortform note: When it comes to planning dates, Fine suggests you prioritize conversing and connecting. However, to really<\/em> help your partner to open up, it\u2019s arguably more important to prioritize their feeling of safety and comfort. As such, don\u2019t try to surprise your date: Always share the full details when you extend your invitation<\/a>. Make sure the date is safe and casual; there shouldn\u2019t be anything about the venue or activity that involves danger or threat. Further, be flexible\u2014offering multiple date options allows you to work around your schedules, as well as the possibility that your partner may not be comfortable with your first suggestion. Finally, be understanding: The other person has every right to say \u201cno,\u201d and if you can\u2019t accept that, you\u2019re not ready to date.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Here’s how to ask someone on a date: When you make the call to arrange the date, Fine says it\u2019s important to remind your potential date of who you are<\/a>: Refresh their memory of specific things that happened when you met, and tell them what you enjoyed about the time you spent together. Let them know you\u2019d like to connect with them again, and then offer your date idea.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Here\u2019s an example conversation:<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n