{"id":47759,"date":"2021-10-01T16:15:48","date_gmt":"2021-10-01T20:15:48","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=47759"},"modified":"2025-10-03T10:12:16","modified_gmt":"2025-10-03T14:12:16","slug":"feeling-superior","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/feeling-superior\/","title":{"rendered":"Stop Feeling Superior at Work: 5 Habits to Kick"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Are you or your manager guilty of feeling superior at work? How can you recognize these bad habits and work to improve them?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Many managers accidentally slip into harmful habits without even realizing it. A common trend among these habits is the tendency to flaunt their superiority to their colleagues. Luckily, these bad habits can be changed if the perpetrator is willing to accept their flaws and work towards change.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Here are the top five superiority habits and how to fix them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n

Editor\u2019s note: This article is part of\u00a0Shortform\u2019s guide to habits<\/a>. If you like what you read here, there\u2019s plenty more to check out in the guide!<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Flaunting Your Apparent Superiority<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

In this section, we\u2019re going to explore the 5 bad habits that successful people often slip into. These habits aren\u2019t deep personality flaws that would take extensive psychiatry to change. Instead, they\u2019re the everyday annoying traits that many successful people\u2014especially those in leadership positions\u2014tend to develop. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Most of these bad behaviors harm others at our own expense<\/strong>. Some professionals wouldn\u2019t characterize harming others for personal gain as a bad thing. Instead, they might see these bad habits as a useful way to gain an advantage over their rivals. However, Goldsmith argues that the key to becoming successful isn\u2019t pushing other people down on your way to the top. Instead, it\u2019s gaining allies who will back you and help to lift you up to further success. Therefore, it\u2019s important to overcome these harmful behaviors.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

We\u2019re going to look at bad habits that fall under the category of feeling superior and flaunting it: <\/strong>in other words, not only believing <\/em>that you\u2019re \u201cbetter\u201d than all of your colleagues, but feeling the need to demonstrate <\/em>how much better you are at every opportunity. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Bad Habit #1: Constantly Needing to Win<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n

In the context of this bad habit, \u201cwinning\u201d could mean a lot of things. For instance, it could mean being right about something. It could mean your idea being selected over a colleague\u2019s. Or it could mean meeting a goal quicker than your peers.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Chasing \u201cwins\u201d isn\u2019t always a bad thing. Sometimes, having healthy competition with your colleagues can drive you to get great results. For instance, it might push you to close a lot of deals, or bring on as many prestigious new clients as possible, just to \u201cbeat\u201d your coworkers. Ultimately, these \u201cwins\u201d are beneficial to you and your employer.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

However, the need to win becomes a problem when you make everything into a competition<\/strong> and strive to \u201cwin\u201d at things that don\u2019t really matter. For example, unhealthy winning is needing to be right whenever you talk to your peers, even if the conversation is about something trivial like which brand of coffee is best. It\u2019s also gloating about these small, trivial wins at every given opportunity, just to remind the people around you that you \u201cbeat\u201d them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This attitude is quickly going to irritate and alienate your colleagues. It suggests you believe your need to come out on top is more important than the feelings of the team. It also suggests that you relish making other people feel \u201clesser.\u201d<\/strong> Neither of these perceptions is going to earn you much respect.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The Healthier Behavior: <\/strong>Evaluate whether \u201cwinning\u201d a certain situation will actually provide any long-term benefits to you or your company. Is this \u201cwin\u201d actually about making tangible progress, such as winning a sale or improving the quality of a project, or is it just about boosting your ego<\/a>? If the latter, is this temporary ego boost worth the lasting damage you may do to your colleagues\u2019 confidence and your reputation? Probably not.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Bad Habit #2: Compulsively \u2018Adding Value\u2019 to People\u2019s Ideas<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n

\u201cAdding value\u201d means trying to improve someone else\u2019s idea<\/strong>\u2014for instance, responding to every suggestion that\u2019s presented to you with \u201cThat\u2019s a great idea, but here\u2019s how to do it better,\u201d or \u201cI think this would be improved if\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Successful people are often tempted to do this because they\u2019re arrogant. They believe that since they\u2019re so successful, they must be smarter than everyone else around them. Therefore, they must be capable of improving every idea presented to them by their \u201clesser\u201d colleagues. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

These successful people often believe they\u2019re being helpful. They\u2019re only trying to share their superior knowledge and ideas with other people\u2014what\u2019s wrong with that? What they don\u2019t realize is that \u201cadding value\u201d only demoralizes the person who originally presented the idea<\/strong>. It makes them feel they\u2019re not good enough to come up with ideas without needing extra help. It also makes them resent the person who\u2019s made them feel so inadequate. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Likewise, \u201cadding value\u201d makes the person who came up with the idea feel they\u2019ve lost ownership of it. It\u2019s not just their <\/em>idea anymore\u2014it contains someone else\u2019s thoughts, too. This is demotivating<\/strong>. People would much rather work on an idea entirely their own, rather than pursue one that\u2019s been hijacked and added to by someone else. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

The Healthier Behavior: <\/strong>Before you try to \u201cadd value\u201d to an idea, evaluate whether doing so is actually worth it. Is what you\u2019re about to suggest so vitally important that it justifies damaging someone\u2019s confidence? Likewise, is showing off how smart and full of good ideas you are worth making people resent you? Arguably, it\u2019s not. Instead of trying to add value, simply thank people for their suggestions and move on. You\u2019ll protect both their feelings and your reputation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Bad Habit #3: Passing Judgment on People\u2019s Ideas and Opinions<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Have you ever asked for your team\u2019s ideas on a certain subject, and then passed judgment on every response\u2014for instance, telling one person \u201cgreat idea,\u201d and another \u201cthat idea needs work\u201d? Many leaders believe passing judgment on ideas and opinions is a positive thing. It gives some of their team members encouragement and others the push they need to improve. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

However, in the long run, passing judgment\u2014even when that judgment is positive\u2014leads to a tense and uncomfortable working atmosphere. Your team members begin to believe that every time they make a suggestion or give an opinion, they\u2019re going to be graded on it.<\/strong> This puts a lot of pressure on them to make \u201cgood\u201d suggestions all the time. They feel that if they don\u2019t, they\u2019re going to be called out for it\u2014a humiliating prospect. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Passing judgment may even make your team members reluctant to suggest things at all for fear of being \u201cgraded\u201d harshly. Their confidence will fall, their stress levels will rise, and they may become afraid of you. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

The Healthier Behavior:<\/strong> When people make suggestions or give their opinions to you, don\u2019t pass either a negative or positive judgment. Just thank the person for their input and move on. Doing so will protect the self-confidence of the person you\u2019re talking to and will make you seem like a kinder, less judgmental person.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Bad Habit #4: Overusing the Words \u2018No,\u2019 \u2018But,\u2019 and \u2018However\u2019<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Overusing the words \u201cno,\u201d \u201cbut,\u201d and \u201chowever\u201d involves constantly challenging the validity of people\u2019s ideas and suggestions.<\/strong> For example, it\u2019s listening to one of your team members outlining a new possible sales strategy and responding with, \u201cThat\u2019s a great idea, but\u2026\u201d or \u201cWhat you\u2019re saying makes sense. However\u2026\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n

This habit breeds conflict. If you respond to someone\u2019s suggestion with a \u201cno,\u201d a \u201cbut,\u201d or a \u201chowever,\u201d you send them the message, \u201cYou\u2019re wrong, I\u2019m right, and I\u2019m about to tell you why.\u201d When people are told they\u2019re wrong, their first instinct is to fight back: to demonstrate that actually, they\u2019re <\/em>the one in the right. More often than not, an argument over who is correct ensues, which isn\u2019t conducive to a healthy and positive working environment.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The Healthier Behavior:<\/strong> Learn to hold your tongue. Consider whether the criticism or challenge you want to make is important or justified enough to risk starting an argument. If it\u2019s not, keep it to yourself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Bad Habit #5: Letting People Know How Smart You Are<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n

This habit is rooted in the desire to always seem like you\u2019re the cleverest person in the room<\/strong>. Some successful people genuinely believe in their own intellectual superiority. They think that to get as far as they have, they must be smarter than everyone else. Others try to make themselves look clever because they feel insecure. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

People frequently slip into this habit when someone presents them with an idea that they\u2019ve heard or thought about before. In such situations, the person will reply, \u201cI already knew that,\u201d \u201cI\u2019m way ahead of you,\u201d or maybe even, \u201cWhy would you bother telling me that?\u201d All of these phrases imply: \u201cI had this amazing idea before you did, which means I\u2019m smarter than you.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Making your prior knowledge of an idea clear in this way may well make you look smart. However, it\u2019ll also make you look callous, arrogant, and rude. In the process of trying to make yourself look clever, you\u2019ve put down the person you\u2019re talking to and tried to make them feel stupid. Nobody is going to respect you for that.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The Healthier Behavior: <\/strong>If someone tells you something you\u2019ve heard before, just say thank you and move on. There\u2019s no need to humiliate them by making your prior knowledge clear. Doing so may give you a temporary ego boost, but it\u2019s only going to harm your reputation and the other person\u2019s confidence.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Are you or your manager guilty of feeling superior at work? How can you recognize these bad habits and work to improve them? Many managers accidentally slip into harmful habits without even realizing it. A common trend among these habits is the tendency to flaunt their superiority to their colleagues. Luckily, these bad habits can be changed if the perpetrator is willing to accept their flaws and work towards change. Here are the top five superiority habits and how to fix them.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":8,"featured_media":50834,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29,34,43],"tags":[478],"class_list":["post-47759","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-career","category-communication","category-self-improvement","tag-what-got-you-here-wont-get-you-there","","tg-column-two"],"yoast_head":"\nStop Feeling Superior at Work: 5 Habits to Kick - Shortform Books<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Some managers feel superior to their employees at work and it shows in negative ways. 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