{"id":46236,"date":"2021-08-24T20:06:00","date_gmt":"2021-08-25T00:06:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=46236"},"modified":"2021-08-25T12:29:30","modified_gmt":"2021-08-25T16:29:30","slug":"meaningful-relationships","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/meaningful-relationships\/","title":{"rendered":"How Meaningful Relationships Help Combat Depression"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>How do <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/meaningful-relationships-ray-dalio\/\">meaningful relationships<\/a> help prevent loneliness and depression? Why does the collective lifestyle of Amish communities help members avoid loneliness and depression?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Meaningful relationships restore us to our natural states as social animals living in close-knit societies. This prevents loneliness and provides a support group that can help you heal from depression. Amish communities share everything and everyone is regarded as family. This style of collective living creates a connected community and drastically reduces the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/risk-of-depression\/\">risk of depression<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Read on to learn more about how meaningful relationships help prevent depression.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<!--more-->\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Build Meaningful Relationships<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>In an increasingly digital world, many of our connections are superficial and don\u2019t allow for meaningful relationships, leading to loneliness and, ultimately, depression. To heal that depression, we need to build genuine, meaningful relationships based on vulnerability and mutual support that restore us to our natural, healthy state as social animals living in close-knit communities.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Self-Care vs. Communal Care<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>One way to build meaningful relationships and benefit from the healing power of connection is to engage in communal care: helping others around us, and receiving help ourselves in turn. Right now, the fatal flaw in depression treatment is that, as a society, we think of it as an individual endeavor. If you\u2019re sick, you go to a doctor who gives you pills that make you better\u2014nobody else needs to be involved. But as we\u2019ve seen, <strong>depression is <\/strong><strong><em>not<\/em><\/strong><strong> just an individual issue. <\/strong>The societal structures that got us into this mess weren\u2019t created by one person, and it will take a communal effort to reshape them into something new and soothe our collective depression.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The idea that depression is a personal issue that should be dealt with alone is a symptom of Western individualist values. Western culture values individual liberty over collective health\u2014if you\u2019re struggling, it\u2019s your own fault; if you want to get better, it\u2019s your own responsibility. We see happiness as an individual thing, so we address it on an individual level. We engage in \u201cself-care\u201d and read books from the \u201cself-help\u201d section\u2014and we\u2019re still miserable.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>That\u2019s a direct contrast to Asian collectivist cultures that value the wellbeing of the community over the wellbeing of particular individuals. <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/failure-is-a-part-of-success\/\">Success and failure<\/a> are shared with the group\u2014when one person struggles, everyone struggles, and when the group succeeds, everyone succeeds. <strong>That\u2019s why, in Asian countries, if you set out to make yourself happy, you&#8217;ll most likely engage in <\/strong><strong><em>communal<\/em><\/strong><strong> care because you see your happiness as intrinsically tied to the happiness of your community. <\/strong>You\u2019ll focus on making life better for other people, knowing that increasing their happiness will ultimately increase your own.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Collectivist approaches to depression actually <em>work<\/em>. Focusing on building meaningful relationships forces your attention out of your own head and creates the mental breathing room you need to genuinely connect with a community. Depression creates an ego-centric worldview\u2014<em>you\u2019re<\/em> unhappy, <em>you <\/em>don\u2019t feel good enough, <em>you\u2019re <\/em>not getting what you need\u2014so countering that narrative by focusing on the <em>group<\/em> is more powerful than looking for a quick fix on your own.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Case Study: Amish Communities<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>When it comes to resisting the pull of individualism and embracing collective living, we can learn a lot from the Amish. In Amish communities, everything is shared. Unrelated neighbors consider each other \u201cfamily,\u201d and every adult takes responsibility for helping to raise children in the community. <strong>People don\u2019t see their family\u2019s house as \u201chome\u201d because the entire community is \u201chome.\u201d<\/strong> That\u2019s the main reason the Amish eschew modern transportation\u2014not using cars means they are always \u201cat home,\u201d or close to it, because home is an entire community contained within the circle of how far you can travel by horse and buggy.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>What makes Amish people especially unique is that they have freely and consciously chosen to give up modern convenience in order to focus on their community. All Amish young people leave the community for two years to go on Rumspringa, where they live in modern cities and are free to use technology, drink alcohol, and fully experience the wider world. At the end of this period, they can choose whether to rejoin their home community. Those who decide to maintain the Amish lifestyle do so because to them, the novelty of the modern world is a distraction from what really matters\u2014a fully connected community.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Obviously, the Amish way of life is an extreme approach, and not one that can or should be used on a grand scale. It also has serious downsides, like the entrenched sexism and homophobia in Amish communities. However, studying Amish <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/individualism-and-collectivism-what-they-are-why-theyre-myths\/\">collectivism<\/a> still offers valuable lessons\u2014lessons that can be applied in communities that look nothing like Amish farmland, like the Kotti neighborhood in Germany.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>How do meaningful relationships help prevent loneliness and depression? Why does the collective lifestyle of Amish communities help members avoid loneliness and depression? Meaningful relationships restore us to our natural states as social animals living in close-knit societies. This prevents loneliness and provides a support group that can help you heal from depression. Amish communities share everything and everyone is regarded as family. This style of collective living creates a connected community and drastically reduces the risk of depression. Read on to learn more about how meaningful relationships help prevent depression.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":10,"featured_media":38157,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[16,12,24],"tags":[464],"class_list":["post-46236","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-health","category-relationships","category-society","tag-lost-connections","","tg-column-two"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v24.3 (Yoast SEO v24.3) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>How Meaningful Relationships Help Combat Depression - Shortform Books<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Treatments for depression neglect the role of community in the healing process. 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Here is why meaningful relationships help with depression.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/meaningful-relationships\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Shortform Books\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2021-08-25T00:06:00+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2021-08-25T16:29:30+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/s3.amazonaws.com\/wordpress.shortform.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/06\/group-of-friends.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"945\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"547\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Joseph Adebisi\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Joseph Adebisi\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"4 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/meaningful-relationships\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/meaningful-relationships\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Joseph Adebisi\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/d8daf45671a09e8745a7a9f50a03b2a0\"},\"headline\":\"How Meaningful Relationships Help Combat Depression\",\"datePublished\":\"2021-08-25T00:06:00+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2021-08-25T16:29:30+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/meaningful-relationships\/\"},\"wordCount\":818,\"commentCount\":0,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/#organization\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/meaningful-relationships\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/06\/group-of-friends.jpg\",\"keywords\":[\"Lost Connections\"],\"articleSection\":[\"Health\",\"Relationships\",\"Society\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/meaningful-relationships\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/meaningful-relationships\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/meaningful-relationships\/\",\"name\":\"How Meaningful Relationships Help Combat Depression - Shortform Books\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/meaningful-relationships\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/meaningful-relationships\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/06\/group-of-friends.jpg\",\"datePublished\":\"2021-08-25T00:06:00+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2021-08-25T16:29:30+00:00\",\"description\":\"Treatments for depression neglect the role of community in the healing process. 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