{"id":44191,"date":"2021-08-01T11:40:00","date_gmt":"2021-08-01T15:40:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=44191"},"modified":"2021-08-08T19:52:06","modified_gmt":"2021-08-08T23:52:06","slug":"brene-brown-wholehearted-living","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/brene-brown-wholehearted-living\/","title":{"rendered":"Bren\u00e9 Brown: The 3 Aspects of Wholehearted Living"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>What are the three aspects of Bren\u00e9 Brown&#8217;s <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/wholehearted-living\/\">wholehearted living<\/a> program? Why are love, belonging, and vulnerability essential to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/living-wholeheartedly\/\">living wholeheartedly<\/a>?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>In Bren\u00e9 Brown&#8217;s lecture <em>The Power of Vulnerability, <\/em>she discusses the three aspects of wholehearted living: love, belonging, and vulnerability. To Bren\u00e9 Brown, love removes the pressure of adhering to cultural and societal demands, belonging is the desire to be a part of something larger than ourselves, and vulnerability is the willingness to share your authentic self, no matter the consequences.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Continue reading to learn about the three aspects of Bren\u00e9 Brown&#8217;s wholehearted living.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<!--more-->\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>The Three Aspects of Wholehearted Living<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>There are three aspects to Bren\u00e9 Brown&#8217;s wholehearted living: love, belonging, and vulnerability.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Love<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Love is a deep connection that operates on respect, affection, and kindness.<\/strong> It isn\u2019t something that you can simply offer or receive, but it requires cultivation and growth over time. It occurs when you allow your most vulnerable self to be seen, developing a truthful relationship in the process.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>You can only love someone else as much as you love yourself. If you don\u2019t believe that you\u2019re loveable, you will put up walls that will prevent others from developing sincere relationships with you. The root of self-loathing is shame, and, if you allow it to dictate your life, you won\u2019t have the capacity to love or be loved.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Love removes the pressure of adhering to cultural and societal demands.<\/strong> It allows you to live your most <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/authentic-life\/\">authentic life<\/a> with someone who values you for <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/your-genius\/\">who you are<\/a>, not who they expect you to be, removing shame in the process. With shame out of the equation, scarcity culture can\u2019t survive because it no longer has a method of controlling your behavior.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Parenting and Self-Love<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Many parents argue that they don\u2019t need to love themselves to love their children. <strong>However, without self-love, it\u2019s nearly impossible to interact with your children without passing your negative emotions on to them, especially during triggering events.&nbsp;<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>For example, if you were bullied in school because you couldn\u2019t afford designer clothes, you may tell your child to wear nicer clothing to \u201cprotect\u201d them from the bullying you experienced. Instead of teaching them to have self-worth, you\u2019re effectively telling them that people will only like them if they dress and act a certain way, paving the way for the development of shame.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Belonging<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Belonging is our intrinsic desire to be a part of something larger than ourselves. <\/strong>Often, we try to change our behavior to fit in based on other people\u2019s expectations. However, this behavior is unfulfilling and creates more barriers to <em>true<\/em> belonging. It\u2019s the result of fear and ties self-worth to acceptance by others, which can lead to shame.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>For example, if you go to a party with the goal of \u201cfitting in,\u201d the success of your evening relies on the opinion of other people. If people don\u2019t accept you, you may question what\u2019s \u201cwrong\u201d with you, developing shame in the process.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>True belonging requires that you share your authentic self with the world to connect with other people, linking your <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/create-a-sense-of-belonging\/\">sense of belonging<\/a> to self-acceptance.<\/strong> With self-acceptance, belonging comes from an authentic place and doesn\u2019t tie your self-worth to the opinions of others.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>For example, if you go to a party with the goal of \u201cbeing authentic,\u201d the success of your evening relies solely on your willingness to be vulnerable and honest. If people don\u2019t accept you, you can still take pride in the fact that you accomplished your goal. Also, it may lead to the realization that these people aren\u2019t the people for you.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Vulnerability<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Vulnerability is the willingness to show up and share your authentic self while knowing that you have no control over the outcome of your interactions. <\/strong>Vulnerability removes defensiveness, promotes empathy, and bolsters creativity.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Both love and belonging require vulnerability because connection requires that you share your authentic self with others. Many associate vulnerability with weakness and push people away out of fear of rejection or ridicule. However, you can\u2019t experience wholeheartedness without it.&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>What are the three aspects of Bren\u00e9 Brown&#8217;s wholehearted living program? Why are love, belonging, and vulnerability essential to living wholeheartedly? In Bren\u00e9 Brown&#8217;s lecture The Power of Vulnerability, she discusses the three aspects of wholehearted living: love, belonging, and vulnerability. To Bren\u00e9 Brown, love removes the pressure of adhering to cultural and societal demands, belonging is the desire to be a part of something larger than ourselves, and vulnerability is the willingness to share your authentic self, no matter the consequences. Continue reading to learn about the three aspects of Bren\u00e9 Brown&#8217;s wholehearted living.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":8,"featured_media":44240,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[9,43],"tags":[445],"class_list":["post-44191","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-psychology","category-self-improvement","tag-the-power-of-vulnerability","","tg-column-two"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v24.3 (Yoast SEO v24.3) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Bren\u00e9 Brown: The 3 Aspects of Wholehearted Living - Shortform Books<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"There are three parts to Bren\u00e9 Brown&#039;s wholehearted living model: love, belonging, and vulnerability. 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