{"id":26665,"date":"2021-02-15T12:11:03","date_gmt":"2021-02-15T16:11:03","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=26665"},"modified":"2021-02-27T22:16:21","modified_gmt":"2021-02-28T02:16:21","slug":"men-and-women-intimacy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/men-and-women-intimacy\/","title":{"rendered":"Men and Women: Intimacy Differs by Gender"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>Do men and women express intimacy differently? How can you recognize and work through these differences? <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>According to John Gray, the author of <em>Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus, <\/em>both men and women display intimacy in cycles. Understanding and not obstructing your partner&#8217;s intimacy cycle is key to an emotionally fulfilling relationship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Read about men and women&#8217;s intimacy cycles.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<!--more-->\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Do Men and Women Express Intimacy Differently?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Men and women have different rhythms and cycles of <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/emotional-intimacy-in-a-relationship\/\">emotional intimacy<\/a> when they\u2019re in love.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\"><li>Men get intimate with their partner, then distance themselves and withdraw, then come back to intimacy again.&nbsp;<\/li><li>Women rise on the wave of love, then fall into dissatisfaction, then swell with love again.&nbsp;<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Men Are Like Rubber Bands&nbsp;<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>When a man is in love, he goes through a natural cycle of intimacy that is a lot like a rubber band. First, the man is very close and intimate. Then he begins to pull away. Once he has stretched to his maximum distance, like a rubber band, he snaps back into the relationship with the same level of intimacy he felt before he stretched.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Many men don\u2019t even realize that their natural intimacy cycles have a profound impact on their female partners. <strong>As a man, do your best to reassure your partner before you stretch away<\/strong>. You can say something like \u201cI need to be alone, but let\u2019s talk about this again once I\u2019ve thought it over.\u201d If nothing else, say the magic words: <strong>\u201cI will come back.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>When a man is pulling away, it is important to allow him to do so. Wait to talk and create intimacy until he has snapped back into the relationship<\/strong>.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Women Are Like Waves&nbsp;<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>When a woman is in love, she goes through a natural cycle of intimacy that is a lot like a wave. First, she feels great and has so much love to give to her partner. Then she begins to fall into a deep well of feelings, like hopelessness and loneliness. Once she has hit rock bottom, like a wave, she will rise and give love again. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>As a man, it is important to be aware of this cycle, understand what a woman needs when she is low, and learn how to respond to your partner\u2019s fluctuations in intimacy.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>When a woman crashes, it is important to support her and allow her to feel her negative feelings. Once she hits rock bottom, she will be ready to rise, give love, and feel good about herself again.&nbsp;<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>The Rubber Band and the Wave<\/strong>: Men, Women, and Intimacy<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Sometimes, when a woman is crashing to the lowest point of her wave and needs to talk, a man is also stretching back his rubber band and can\u2019t listen. Without an understanding of the differences between men&#8217;s and women&#8217;s intimacy patterns, this could cause conflict in a relationship. But once you know the natural differences between men and women, you can learn to work through these difficult periods together.&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Do men and women express intimacy differently? How can you recognize and work through these differences? According to John Gray, the author of Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus, both men and women display intimacy in cycles. Understanding and not obstructing your partner&#8217;s intimacy cycle is key to an emotionally fulfilling relationship. Read about men and women&#8217;s intimacy cycles.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":7,"featured_media":150,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[34,9,12],"tags":[207],"class_list":["post-26665","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-communication","category-psychology","category-relationships","tag-men-are-from-mars","","tg-column-two"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v24.3 (Yoast SEO v24.3) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Men and Women: Intimacy Differs by Gender - Shortform Books<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Both men and women display intimacy in cycles. Understanding your partner&#039;s intimacy cycle is key to an emotionally fulfilling relationship.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/men-and-women-intimacy\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Men and Women: Intimacy Differs by Gender\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Both men and women display intimacy in cycles. Understanding your partner&#039;s intimacy cycle is key to an emotionally fulfilling relationship.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/men-and-women-intimacy\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Shortform Books\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2021-02-15T16:11:03+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2021-02-28T02:16:21+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/emotional-intelligence-relationship2.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"687\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"454\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Darya Sinusoid\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Darya Sinusoid\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"3 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/men-and-women-intimacy\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/men-and-women-intimacy\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Darya Sinusoid\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/0421cce75bc249b11e2517b3a91f9c46\"},\"headline\":\"Men and Women: Intimacy Differs by Gender\",\"datePublished\":\"2021-02-15T16:11:03+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2021-02-28T02:16:21+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/men-and-women-intimacy\/\"},\"wordCount\":524,\"commentCount\":0,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/#organization\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/men-and-women-intimacy\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/emotional-intelligence-relationship2.jpg\",\"keywords\":[\"Men are From Mars\"],\"articleSection\":[\"Communication\",\"Psychology\",\"Relationships\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/men-and-women-intimacy\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/men-and-women-intimacy\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/men-and-women-intimacy\/\",\"name\":\"Men and Women: Intimacy Differs by Gender - Shortform Books\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/men-and-women-intimacy\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/men-and-women-intimacy\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/emotional-intelligence-relationship2.jpg\",\"datePublished\":\"2021-02-15T16:11:03+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2021-02-28T02:16:21+00:00\",\"description\":\"Both men and women display intimacy in cycles. 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