{"id":23595,"date":"2021-01-03T09:37:38","date_gmt":"2021-01-03T13:37:38","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=23595"},"modified":"2021-01-17T14:10:36","modified_gmt":"2021-01-17T18:10:36","slug":"negotiation-tactics","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/negotiation-tactics\/","title":{"rendered":"11 Negotiation Tactics From a Former FBI Agent"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Do you want to improve your negotiation skills<\/a>, and more generally, become a more competent communicator? What are some negotiation tactics you can practice?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

According to former FBI hostage negotiator Chris Voss, negotiation is more about emotion than logic. Thus, the most effective negotiation tactics are those that are geared towards appealing to the emotions of your opponent.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Keep reading for 11 negotiation tactics battlefield-tested by a former FBI hostage negotiator.<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n

Chris Voss’s Negotiation Tactics <\/h2>\n\n\n\n

According to Chris Voss, it is emotion, not logic, that determines the success or failure of negotiations. Being emotionally intelligent and empathetic is how you draw the crucial information out of your counterpart that gives you a decisive advantage. You get what you <\/em>want by gaining a deeper understanding<\/a> of what they <\/em>want.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

This approach flies in the face of a lot of traditional, old-school negotiating theories. Never Split the Difference <\/em>argues that rational self-interest, win-win negotiating, getting to yes, and other traditional negotiation tactics are incomplete\u2014they ignore the actual human beings doing the negotiating<\/strong>. We\u2019re not robots, precisely calculating our best interests and formulating rational offers and counter-offers designed to maximize our utility. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Instead, we\u2019re highly irrational and emotional beings who have to make decisions with incomplete knowledge. We suffer from cognitive biases<\/a> that prevent us impartially assessing alternatives. Understanding this <\/em>is the key to getting what you want from other people: which is all that any <\/em>negotiation is. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Making a Connection<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n

All the negotiation tactics in Never Split the Difference <\/em>are designed to help your negotiating counterpart forge a genuine human connection<\/a> with you. This isn\u2019t meant to be touchy-feely: it\u2019s meant to tap into how <\/em>human beings come to trust one another and share critical information with one another.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

We are emotional, not rational creatures. We want to connect with people who we believe are similar to us, who understand us, and who make us feel less alone<\/strong>. Getting the person on the other side of the table to see you as being perceptive, insightful, warm, and welcome is crucial to establishing the basis of trust<\/a> that will power you to successful negotiations. You\u2019re not there to bombard them with facts or bully them into submission: you\u2019re there to listen, to empathize<\/em>, and to help them see that solving your problems solves their <\/em>problems as well. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

These are the key negotiation tactics that you use to turn human emotions to your advantage.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

1. Active Listening<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

People want to know that you\u2019re hearing their views and internalizing what they have to say. They\u2019ll feel isolated and alone if they think they\u2019re talking to a brick wall. Active listening is how you tune out your own internal commentary and focus only <\/em>on what the other person is saying. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Usually, we are only passively listening: hearing only what we want <\/em>to hear and filtering out everything else. When you show your counterpart that you\u2019re actively listening, they\u2019ll be able to trust you, let their guard down, and share information with you. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

You can signal that you\u2019re actively listening by not rushing them and using a calm, friendly, and upbeat speaking voice.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

2. Mirroring<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

When you reply to someone, use the same last three words that the person has said. For example, when someone says, \u201cI can\u2019t believe that you were so insensitive,\u201d you can repeat, \u201cI\u2019m sorry that I was so insensitive.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

People are drawn to what\u2019s similar and are distrustful of things that seem alien or different<\/strong>. By imitating their speech patterns, you\u2019re signaling to the other person not only that you\u2019re hearing them, but that you\u2019re like<\/em> them too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

3. Tactical Empathy<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

Tactical empathy<\/a> is understanding someone else\u2019s position in order to get what you want from them. It\u2019s about recognizing their perspective and feelings and vocalizing it, in order to get what you <\/em>want. It\u2019s different from sympathy: you\u2019re not <\/strong>agreeing <\/em><\/strong>with them.<\/strong>  <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Practicing tactical empathy makes someone\u2019s behavior not only more understandable, but also more predictable. You\u2019ll be able to anticipate their next move.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

4. Labeling<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

This is a way to practice tactical empathy. It involves identifying and vocalizing someone else\u2019s emotions through neutral, qualified, third-person phrases like, \u201cIt seems like you\u2019re…\u201d \u201cIt looks like you\u2019re…\u201d or \u201cIt sounds like you\u2019re…\u201d This acknowledges their emotional state and makes them feel less alone. You demystify and defuse their fears and anxieties by bringing them out into the open<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

5. Accusation Audits<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

You use an accusation audit when you label your counterpart\u2019s negative emotions about you<\/em> specifically by listing every bad thing they could say about you at the beginning of the negotiation, nipping it in the bud. For example, you could say, \u201cListen: I totally understand if you think I\u2019m withholding information from you, trying to confuse you, or even outright lying to you.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This defuses the situation immediately and puts it all right out there in the open. You then ask for input based on that list, knowing that they\u2019ll want to reassure <\/strong>you<\/em><\/strong> that you\u2019re not as bad as you\u2019ve portrayed yourself.<\/strong> Your accusation audit causes the other party to seek common ground.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

6. Get Them to Say \u201cNo\u201d<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

A lot of standard negotiation tactics are geared towards getting your counterpart to say \u201cyes.\u201d These theories see \u201cno\u201d as a barrier to be overcome. But this view has it backward: you want <\/em>your counterpart to say \u201cno.\u201d<\/strong> Why? Because it puts them in a position of control: they\u2019re <\/em>setting boundaries<\/a> and demonstrating their autonomy. You\u2019re clearing the way for real negotiation by giving them the freedom and agency to draw their own limits. By getting them to identify what they don\u2019t <\/em>want, you can get down to what they do<\/em> want<\/strong>. And once they\u2019re revealed what they really want, you have the upper hand.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

7. Summarize to Earn a \u201cThat\u2019s Right\u201d<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

Active listening will give you keen insight into how someone sees the world. Once you do this, you can use a powerful tactic to show <\/em>how much you understand them: summarizing. When you accurately summarize in your own words what someone has to say (going a step beyond mirroring), it shows them that they\u2019ve made a breakthrough in your <\/em>mind. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Then, you\u2019ll hear them say two words that can transform the negotiating environment: \u201cthat\u2019s right.\u201d When someone says this, they\u2019re crediting you with seeing things their way. They feel that they\u2019re dealing with someone who understands and respects their point of view. When they pronounce <\/strong>you <\/em><\/strong>to be correct in your evaluation of <\/strong>them, <\/em><\/strong>they also provide a valuable window into their true motivations and desires<\/strong>. This is like a roadmap of their mind that gives you a powerful and potentially decisive advantage.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

8. Reframe the Discussion<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

The Framing Effect<\/a> causes us to evaluate risks and rewards largely based on how they\u2019re presented to us. People are motivated more by fear of losing something than hope of gaining something<\/strong>, even if the loss and gain are the same. Knowing this, you can frame your preferred solution as one that prevents your counterpart from incurring a loss.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

9. Calibrated Questions<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

When you hear something you don\u2019t like, don\u2019t just say \u201cno.\u201d Ask open-ended \u201chow\u201d or \u201cwhat\u201d questions like, \u201cHow am I supposed to do that?\u201d<\/strong> or \u201cWhat are we really trying to accomplish here?\u201d<\/strong> They prompt longer answers, which reveal key information. They also introduce ideas and requests without seeming pushy or aggressive: you ask without asking. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Crucially, calibrated questions put your counterpart to work helping you. <\/em>They\u2019re giving you the answers and helping you solve your <\/em>problem. Lastly, they\u2019ll buy into the solution and commit to it because they\u2019ll think it\u2019s <\/strong>their <\/em><\/strong>idea<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

10. Finding the Unknown Unknowns<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

There is always some unknown piece of information that has the potential to completely transform the dynamic of any negotiation. \u201cUnknown Unknowns\u201d or Black Swans are the bits of information we lack\u2014 and don\u2019t <\/strong>know <\/em><\/strong>that we lack<\/strong>. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

You can uncover these hidden gems by paying attention<\/a> to subtle verbal and nonverbal cues<\/a>. Your counterpart might not know <\/em>how important their Black Swan<\/a> is. Your task is to uncover it by asking the right questions<\/a>. Those who can best identify and exploit the unknown unknowns<\/a> come out on top. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

For example, a car dealer might inadvertently reveal to you that the dealership has more <\/em>of the particular model of car that you want than could ever hope to sell. In this case, knowing that they\u2019re paying high inventory costs could give you an opportunity to get a great deal: they\u2019ll be eager to sell even at a low price just to cut down on those inventory costs.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

11. When Negotiating an Amount, Follow the Ackerman Model<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

As a shortcut, you can also follow a simple Ackerman Model<\/a> to squeeze more value out of your negotiations. Briefly, this plan tells you to:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

  1. Do your research to set an ambitious, but achievable target price.<\/li>
  2. Establish your first offer at 65 percent of that target price.<\/li>
  3. Figure out your counteroffers. Typically, these should be three raises of decreasing <\/em>increments off your original target price (85 percent, 90 percent, 95 percent).<\/li>
  4. Use calibrated questions and labels to force them to counter you before <\/em>you increase your offers.<\/li>
  5. When you\u2019re presenting your final number, use a precise, non-round figure (like $89,174.83 instead of $89,000). This makes it sound like a product of precise calculation and feels more definite and non-negotiable to your counterpart.<\/li>
  6. Lastly, include a non-monetary item of little value to you, to signal that you\u2019ve reached your final offer.<\/li><\/ol>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    Do you want to improve your negotiation skills, and more generally, become a more competent communicator? What are some negotiation tactics you can practice? According to former FBI hostage negotiator Chris Voss, negotiation is more about emotion than logic. Thus, the most effective negotiation tactics are those that are geared towards appealing to the emotions of your opponent. Keep reading for 11 negotiation tactics battlefield-tested by a former FBI hostage negotiator.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":7,"featured_media":11966,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[45,34,9],"tags":[185],"class_list":["post-23595","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-business","category-communication","category-psychology","tag-never-split-the-difference","","tg-column-two"],"yoast_head":"\n11 Negotiation Tactics From a Former FBI Agent - Shortform Books<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Negotiation is more about emotion than logic. 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