{"id":23267,"date":"2021-01-07T09:22:14","date_gmt":"2021-01-07T13:22:14","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=23267"},"modified":"2021-01-17T14:11:18","modified_gmt":"2021-01-17T18:11:18","slug":"qualities-of-a-good-negotiator","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/qualities-of-a-good-negotiator\/","title":{"rendered":"Qualities of a Good Negotiator: It’s All About the Heart"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

What are the qualities of a good negotiator? What do successful negotiators do differently from those that are merely mediocre?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The qualities of a good negotiator are all related to emotional intelligence and understanding your counterpart’s desires and fears. Negotiation is more about the heart than the mind. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Keep reading for more about the qualities of a good negotiator.<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n

Guided by Emotions<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

We are all inherently irrational and impulsive<\/strong>, willing to make decisions with incomplete information and disregard for our own basic material interests if the decision satisfies a deeper emotional need.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Most people have two basic emotional needs: 1) to feel secure and 2) to feel that they are in control. <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Successful negotiators, then, must navigate the complexity of human emotions to take advantage of those needs and give their counterpart the information that satisfies them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The bottom line of any negotiation is: get the other person to be more comfortable with you, to see you more as a partner than an adversary. <\/strong>Once this happens, they\u2019ll be far more willing to grant you access to their innermost thought processes and hidden desires: giving you the decisive negotiating advantage.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Qualities of a Good Negotiator<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Most of what we call \u201cnegotiating\u201d is happening beneath the surface. The qualities of a good negotiator, then, must include the abilities to identify, articulate, and ultimately use their counterpart\u2019s hidden wants and irrational blind spots to their advantage<\/strong>. When you do this, you are making their reality conform to what you <\/em>want them to give you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What you need to do is reframe their view and alter their reality. You show them that by helping you achieve your <\/em>desired solution, they will satisfy their own <\/em>hidden wants. Ultimately, you are using their <\/em>instincts to your <\/em>advantage. There are three main ways to do this.<\/p>\n\n\n\n