{"id":232,"date":"2019-07-01T23:08:51","date_gmt":"2019-07-02T03:08:51","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=232"},"modified":"2022-04-14T17:51:44","modified_gmt":"2022-04-14T21:51:44","slug":"anger-management-for-kids","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/anger-management-for-kids\/","title":{"rendered":"Anger Management for Kids: Tips from Psychology"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>Our family is the first place we learn about emotions and how to handle them. Children learn not just through the things parents say, but the things they see parents do as well. This includes anger.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Learn <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-control-anger-and-manage-anger-issues\/\">how to manage anger<\/a> in your children, and how to connect with them emotionally.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<!--more-->\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Parenting Styles for Anger Management<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>There are 3 common parenting styles that are harmful:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\"><li>1) <strong>Ignoring feelings completely.<\/strong> This method leads children to believe emotions are inconveniences. These parents don\u2019t use emotional moments as teaching moments, and they don\u2019t usually develop closeness to their kids.<\/li><li>2) <strong>Being too accepting.<\/strong> These parents acknowledge their children\u2019s emotions but don\u2019t teach them acceptable and healthy ways of controlling their reactions to those emotions.<\/li><li>3) <strong>Treating emotions with contempt.<\/strong> These parents are harsh critics and disapprove of any emotional display. Ironically, they usually deal emotionally with their children, punishing out of anger and meeting emotional responses with bigger, more overwhelming emotional responses of their own.<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p>We\u2019ll look at 3 common issues parents face with their children&#8211;anger, depression, and eating disorders&#8211;and the danger of letting these issues go unmitigated.<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Anger in Children<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Angry kids usually become bullies who, incapable of handling their own emotional reactions, take their anger out on other children, leading to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/social-alienation\/\">social isolation<\/a>, disciplinary actions, and judgement from teachers.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Bullies are more likely to drop out of school and end up with criminal records, and they\u2019re likely to pass their violence and aggression down to their kids&#8211;not only through genes but through nurturing and the environment of the household&#8211;which creates more bullies.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Bullies typically come from households where punishment is an emotion-based system.<\/strong> When parents are in a bad mood, the punishment for misbehaving is severe. When parents are in a good mood, the kids can do whatever they want without consequences. This volatility and lack of logic creates a kind of chaos that encourages letting emotions dictate one\u2019s actions, violence and aggression as the primary ways of <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-deal-with-negative-emotions\/\">dealing with negative emotions<\/a>, and a lack of boundaries.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Very often, bullies come from households of abuse or neglect. Abused children are more likely to abuse their own children, creating whole family lineages of abuse passed down through the generations. Abuse shatters trust in people and the world around them, and often makes the victims feel as though something about themselves caused the abuse, or that they deserve it for some reason. On the opposite end are households where parents emotionally neglect their children&#8211;and neglect can be more detrimental than abuse, some studies find.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Anger doesn\u2019t always result in bullying&#8211;sometimes angry children are social outcasts, withdrawn and overreactive to perceived insults. This is the common tendency among angry kids, whether they\u2019re bullies or not: <strong>angry children perceive threats or slights where they\u2019re not intended<\/strong>&#8211;someone bumping into them accidentally in the hall, for example&#8211;and then lash out at those perceived threats, furthering their isolation. Most of these kids see themselves as victims who are merely acting in self-defense. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Our family is the first place we learn about emotions and how to handle them. Children learn not just through the things parents say, but the things they see parents do as well. This includes anger.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":142,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[13,9],"tags":[10],"class_list":["post-232","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-parenting","category-psychology","tag-emotional-intelligence","","tg-column-two"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v24.3 (Yoast SEO v24.3) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Anger Management for Kids: Tips from Psychology - Shortform Books<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"How do you manage anger in kids? How do you deal with an angry child? 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