What happens when your feedback comes without caring personally for the person you’re speaking to? How do manipulative insincerity and obnoxious aggression prevent a culture of radical candor?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Manipulative insincerity is a type of feedback that doesn’t challenge people to improve and doesn’t come from caring personally. Obnoxious aggression does challenge, but does so without caring.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Keep reading to better understand manipulative insincerity and obnoxious aggression, and how they fall short of radical candor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n
As a boss, your guidance can fall into one of four quadrants along the axes of caring personally<\/em> and challenging directly<\/em>: \u201cobnoxious aggression,\u201d \u201cmanipulative insincerity,\u201d \u201cruinous empathy,\u201d and radical candor. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Manipulative insincerity happens when you don\u2019t care about your employees, but do<\/em> care about how they perceive you, so you avoid challenges and disagreements, which might make them feel negatively about you. There\u2019s no real guidance in an environment led by manipulative insincerity, because there\u2019s never any honest, actionable feedback given. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Praise from a place of manipulative insincerity<\/strong> is usually in the form of a false apology, made just to avoid uncomfortable conversations. If your employee confronts you, saying, \u201cYou said my proposal isn\u2019t clarified enough for the debate. That really bothered me,\u201d manipulative insincerity will push you to duck out of the discomfort of disagreement. Instead of explaining your perspective, you might say, \u201cWell, you know the project best and if you think it\u2019s ready, I agree. Sorry for doubting you.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n Criticism from a place of manipulative insincerity<\/strong> is often too nice and dishonest, stemming from your fear of how you\u2019ll be perceived if you challenge your employee or give negative feedback. Instead of honestly telling an employee her proposal is weak, you might say, \u201cMaybe this proposal needs to be refined a bit, but of course, you know the project better than I do, so you can make that call. Overall it looks really great!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Obnoxious aggression happens when you challenge directly without caring personally. Bosses who fall into the obnoxious aggression quadrant give feedback that is based in humiliating and holding power over people. Obnoxious aggression isn\u2019t necessarily good<\/em>, but if you\u2019re going to be in any quadrant outside radical candor, this is the one to be in\u2014if you\u2019re challenging people, at least you are making an attempt to help them improve, and the rest of your team won\u2019t have to pick up their slack. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Praise from a place of obnoxious aggression<\/strong> is usually characterized by empty compliments and regurgitated information\u2014it\u2019s clear that there\u2019s no care behind your words. If your employee tells you about her weekend, but you don\u2019t really care what she did, you might respond with a generic, \u201cWow, sounds cool.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Criticism from a place of obnoxious aggression<\/strong> is usually arrogant, personal, and meant to be humiliating. Often, the criticizer makes assumptions about the recipient. For example, if your employee sends a messy proposal to the team, you might hit Reply All to say, \u201cThis proposal is a mess. I can\u2019t believe how many typos you missed. I know some of your work can be subpar, but this is something else.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" What happens when your feedback comes without caring personally for the person you’re speaking to? How do manipulative insincerity and obnoxious aggression prevent a culture of radical candor? Manipulative insincerity is a type of feedback that doesn’t challenge people to improve and doesn’t come from caring personally. Obnoxious aggression does challenge, but does so without caring. Keep reading to better understand manipulative insincerity and obnoxious aggression, and how they fall short of radical candor.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":6,"featured_media":12103,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[34,20,12],"tags":[177],"class_list":["post-21925","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-communication","category-ethics","category-relationships","tag-radical-candor","","tg-column-two"],"yoast_head":"\n<\/td> Not Challenging Directly<\/strong><\/td> Challenging Directly<\/strong><\/td><\/tr> Caring Personally<\/strong><\/td> Ruinous Empathy<\/a><\/td> Radical Candor<\/td><\/tr> Not Caring Personally<\/strong><\/td> Manipulative Insincerity<\/td> Obnoxious Aggression<\/td><\/tr><\/tbody><\/table><\/figure>\n\n\n\n Manipulative Insincerity <\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Obnoxious Aggression<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n