{"id":1848,"date":"2019-10-06T12:07:26","date_gmt":"2019-10-06T16:07:26","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=1848"},"modified":"2025-09-03T15:25:38","modified_gmt":"2025-09-03T19:25:38","slug":"trevor-noah-father","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/trevor-noah-father\/","title":{"rendered":"Trevor Noah\u2019s Father Robert: Once Estranged, Reunited"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>Who is Trevor Noah&#8217;s father? How did they lose touch? And what impact did he have on the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/life-of-a-comedian\/\">comedian&#8217;s life<\/a>?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Trevor Noah&#8217;s father is Robert Noah, a Swiss-German who opened one of the first integrated restaurants in Johannesburg during <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/trevor-noah-apartheid\/\">apartheid<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Learn how Trevor Noah&#8217;s parents met, how Trevor lost touch with his father, and how they reunited through Trevor&#8217;s valiant efforts.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<!--more-->\n\n\n\n<p><em>Editor\u2019s note: This article is part of <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/hub\/society-culture\/psychology\/emotional-intelligence-guide\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Shortform\u2019s guide to emotional intelligence<\/a>. If you like what you read here, there\u2019s plenty more to check out in the guide!<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-trevor-noah-s-parents-meet\"><strong>Trevor Noah&#8217;s Parents Meet<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>In Johannesburg, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/trevor-noah-mom\/\">Trevor Noah&#8217;s mom<\/a>, Patricia, and Trevor Noah&#8217;s dad, Robert, met. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Patricia\u2019s apartment was in a culturally active, artistic community called Hillbrow. <strong>This location was relatively liberal and home to whites who disapproved of or didn\u2019t care about apartheid.<\/strong> One of these people was a Swiss-German man named Robert.&nbsp;<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Black women were not supposed to live in Johannesburg. The threat of police was always close in this neighborhood. Neighbors were encouraged to spy on one another. At any point, Patricia could have been turned in to the police or suspected of being a spy, which had other consequences. Her ability to trust the people was small, but Robert lived on her floor and seemed trustworthy. He was quiet, reserved, and uninterested in the laws of apartheid.&nbsp;<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Robert was almost twice Patricia\u2019s age, and their relationship was more friendship than lovers. Still, one night, she propositioned him about having a child. Not only was having Robert\u2019s baby a form of resistance for Patricia, it was also advantageous. She wanted a baby, not a marriage, and Robert said he didn\u2019t want a child. Also, because it was illegal, he could have no legal claim to the baby. He said no many times before finally conceding.&nbsp;<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>On February 20, 1984, Patricia gave birth to Noah. She told the doctors the father was from a different country to explain Noah\u2019s complexion. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-trevor-noah-s-father-and-mother-conceal-their-crime\">Trevor Noah&#8217;s Father and Mother <strong>Conceal Their Crime<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Before Noah was born, Patricia found a new apartment in an adjacent neighborhood. She thought this would ensure her freedom from Robert\u2019s involvement. She didn&#8217;t want Trevor Noah&#8217;s father to be involved. But <strong>when Robert saw her afterward and Noah wasn\u2019t with her, he realized he couldn\u2019t have a child and not be involved<\/strong>. The period that followed would become one of dire secrecy for both Patricia and Robert.&nbsp;<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Because Robert couldn\u2019t be seen with Noah in public\u2014<strong>a white man with a mixed son would raise too many questions<\/strong>\u2014Patricia would take Noah to a park, and Trevor Noah&#8217;s dad would join them at a safe distance. This worked most of the time, but once, Noah noticed his father and ran toward him, yelling \u201cDaddy! Daddy!\u201d Other people started to look, and Robert tried to run away. Noah chased him, thinking it was a game of tag.&nbsp;<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Soon, Noah could only visit Robert at his home, which was safest for everyone.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-robert-noah-s-past\"><strong>Robert<\/strong> Noah&#8217;s Past<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>There is so much Noah doesn\u2019t know about his father, even now. <\/strong>He doesn\u2019t know anything about Robert\u2019s extended family or what his life was like before Patricia. What he does know is that his father was a chef in Canada and New York, then opened some bars and restaurants in South Africa, but that\u2019s it. But thanks to Patricia\u2019s insistence, he\u2019s been able to learn a little about Robert as a person.&nbsp;<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Noah attributes his father\u2019s private nature to his parents\u2019 ability to get away with a mixed child during apartheid. Where Patricia was feisty, Robert was reserved. Noah believes he is the confluence of both.<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Trevor Noah&#8217;s dad hated racism and homogeneity of any kind. <\/strong>This feeling wasn\u2019t one of moral superiority, but rather a lack of understanding about why apartheid existed. Robert couldn\u2019t rationalize why white people would come to Africa if they didn\u2019t like black people. Therefore, <strong>because the laws were illogical, he never lived by them<\/strong>.&nbsp;<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Robert opened the first integrated restaurants in Johannesburg during apartheid through a special license to serve black people. The licenses were distributed by the government out of necessity. Visiting black dignitaries and tourists from other countries were not subject to the laws of apartheid, so they had to make special cases to accommodate them. Black South Africans with money exploited this loophole by frequenting establishments with licenses.<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The restaurant was a success. White people were curious about black people, and black people were curious about what the white people were curious about. This common intrigue outweighed the boundaries they were supposed to uphold. But <strong>some white people didn\u2019t like these subversive establishments, and they petitioned to have Robert\u2019s restaurant shut down<\/strong>.&nbsp;<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>At first, the inspectors tried to shut down the restaurant for health violations, but Robert, like most Swiss-Germans, was anything but unclean. Then, they mandated he have a separate toilet for each race of patron. This was an impossible task, and Robert wouldn\u2019t comply. Eventually, <strong>he chose to close the restaurant, rather than pander to the government<\/strong>.&nbsp;<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-robert-s-freedom-to-be-a-father\"><strong>Robert&#8217;s Freedom To Be a Father<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>When apartheid ended, Robert moved to a newly segregated and eclectic area called Yeoville. No longer fearing prison, he could now take Noah to play in the nearby park with kids from various races.<strong> <\/strong>He and Noah would meet every Sunday afternoon at his house, which was great news for Noah, who got to skip church.<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Noah would celebrate his birthday with Robert each year, and Christmas as well. Noah loved Christmas with Robert because it was European Christmas, with a tree, fake snow, stockings, and presents from Santa Claus. On the contrary, African Christmas was only church, then a nice meal. A present in African Christmas was always just clothes and never from Santa. No African was going to give Santa credit for a present bought with hard-earned money.&nbsp;<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>When Noah visited, Robert would cook his favorite meal: a Swiss dish called <em>R\u00f6sti<\/em>, a potato pancake with gravy. Trevor Noah&#8217;s dad was a quiet person, and many afternoons were spent without talking. But <strong>he was a good father, always attentive, affectionate, and generous<\/strong>.<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Noah likens his time with his father to a web series. A bit of information would be doled out a few minutes each time, and he\u2019d have to wait until the next week to find out more.&nbsp;<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-trevor-and-his-dad-lose-touch\">Trevor and His Dad <strong>Lose Touch<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>When Noah was 13, he lost his connection to Robert.<\/strong> Distance had already grown in their relationship for a couple of reasons: one, Noah was a typical teenager who didn\u2019t want to spend time with his parents, and two, Abel, Patricia\u2019s then-husband, didn\u2019t approve of her being in touch with her ex. Abel\u2019s temper was enough to keep them home.&nbsp;&nbsp;<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Noah\u2019s visits with Robert slowed to every other week, then once a month, then to whenever Patricia and Noah could secretly slip away. The sneaking around during apartheid was back, but this time the oppressive ruler was her abusive husband.&nbsp;<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Robert eventually moved to Cape Town. There\u2019d been a <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/suburban-flight\/\">white flight<\/a> from Yeoville when other races started moving in, and many of Robert\u2019s close friends were among those who fled. Noah didn\u2019t think much about Robert\u2019s move. He never thought it would end their relationship.&nbsp;<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Noah became preoccupied with school, shenanigans, learning how to be an adult, and then starting his career as a comedian. <strong>But thoughts of his father lived in his subconscious. <\/strong>He wondered where Robert was, how he was, whether he thought about Noah or knew anything about who he\u2019d become.&nbsp;<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Without any contact, it became easy for Noah to come to his own conclusions. <strong>He assumed Robert didn\u2019t care about him and had moved on with his own life.<\/strong> Only Patricia\u2019s constant kind words about Robert kept those thoughts at bay. She always reminded Noah that Robert chose to be in his life when it was safer for him not to be.&nbsp;<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-trevor-noah-s-father-returns-to-his-life\"><strong>Trevor Noah&#8217;s Father Returns to His Life<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>When Noah was 24, Patricia encouraged him to find Robert.<\/strong> Noah hadn\u2019t seen him for 10 years and never thought he would again. Noah didn\u2019t see the big deal. He\u2019d grown up, started his career, and was happy. But <strong>she said it was important for Noah to show Robert who he\u2019d become and learn about him<\/strong>. She didn\u2019t want Noah going through life believing his father didn\u2019t care about him, something that may not be true.&nbsp;<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-searching-for-answers\"><strong>Searching for Answers<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>When Noah tried to find Robert after Patricia\u2019s encouragement, he didn\u2019t have much to go on. Robert was so private, there was almost no information about him.&nbsp;<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Noah wrote to the Swiss embassy, but they wouldn\u2019t help him because Robert was not listed on his birth certificate as Trevor Noah&#8217;s father. He finally convinced the embassy to send Robert a letter from him. After a few months, Noah received a letter back. He made a plan to go to Cape Town.<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The visit with Robert after so long was awkward. Noah felt like he was meeting a man he knew but didn\u2019t <em>really<\/em> know. He had vague memories of Robert and could recall few details about his mannerisms and voice. But after arriving, they were back into their old routine.&nbsp;<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Robert had all of Noah\u2019s favorite foods from the last time he saw him, when Noah was 13. <strong>He also brought out a photo album containing every clip from Noah\u2019s career right up to that very week.<\/strong> He\u2019d been following Noah\u2019s career and was proud of him.&nbsp;<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>At that moment, <strong>Noah felt the gap between them disappear<\/strong>. He knew Robert had always been his father, even if when wasn\u2019t there. Noah felt proud, chosen, and wanted.<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Noah wanted to make up for all the time that had passed. On his next visit, he started asking Robert question after question, like an interview. But he realized a list of questions was not the way to forge an emotional bond. <strong>Apartheid had stolen years of their being together, and only time together could make up for it.<\/strong>&nbsp;<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The two had dinner and talked about the news, watched TV, and listened to Elvis Presley records in the yard. Robert asked Noah if he\u2019d learned anything new about him, to which Noah responded he\u2019d learned how secretive Robert was. Robert smiled and said Noah was getting to know him already.&nbsp;Trevor Noah&#8217;s father was a stranger no longer.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Who is Trevor Noah&#8217;s father? How did they lose touch? And what impact did he have on the comedian&#8217;s life? Trevor Noah&#8217;s father is Robert Noah, a Swiss-German who opened one of the first integrated restaurants in Johannesburg during apartheid. Learn how Trevor Noah&#8217;s parents met, how Trevor lost touch with his father, and how they reunited through Trevor&#8217;s valiant efforts.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":1886,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[13,33,12],"tags":[50],"class_list":["post-1848","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-parenting","category-people","category-relationships","tag-born-a-crime","","tg-column-two"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v24.3 (Yoast SEO v24.3) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Trevor Noah\u2019s Father Robert: Once Estranged, Reunited - Shortform Books<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Trevor Noah&#039;s father is Robert Noah, a Swiss-German who opened one of the first integrated restaurants in Johannesburg. 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