{"id":136859,"date":"2024-11-26T13:58:25","date_gmt":"2024-11-26T17:58:25","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=136859"},"modified":"2024-12-03T18:00:56","modified_gmt":"2024-12-03T22:00:56","slug":"how-good-are-you","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-good-are-you\/","title":{"rendered":"How Good Are You? Perhaps Not as Good as You Think"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>How good are you? Are you at your best when you&#8217;re around others or when you&#8217;re on your own?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>In <em>You Are Not So Smart<\/em>, David McRaney reveals fascinating insights about human behavior and <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/self-image-psychology\/\">self-perception<\/a>. He explores how our actions change in group settings and why we&#8217;re not as independent-minded as we&#8217;d like to believe.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Keep reading to discover why it can be more difficult to maintain your values and motivation when others are around.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<!--more-->\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-are-you-as-good-as-you-think\">Are You as Good as You Think?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Just how good are you? McRaney asserts that we aren\u2019t as honorable as we believe ourselves to be\u2014especially under the pressure and influence of others. We\u2019ll discuss how this truth plays out in human behavior.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-thought-error-your-motivation-to-do-good-diminishes-in-the-presence-of-others\">Thought Error: Your Motivation to Do Good Diminishes in the Presence of Others<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>McRaney explains that, despite wanting to do good, we\u2019re less motivated to do so when we\u2019re around others. <\/strong>This can be seen in psychological phenomena such as <em><a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/the-bystander-effect-pluralistic-ignorance\/\">the bystander effect<\/a><\/em> (the more people are involved in the situation, the less motivated we are to act) and <em>social loafing <\/em>(the more people are involved in a task, the more we slack off). These phenomena occur for two reasons. First, the more people there are in a setting, the more we lose <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/personal-accountability\/\">personal accountability<\/a> and rely on others to act. Second, we\u2019re shy\u2014we don\u2019t want to act in front of the group and garner attention.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>For example, if 10 people are working together to clean a space, you likely won\u2019t work as fast or as hard because you know there are others to pick up the slack. Likewise, if there\u2019s a tree branch on the road and there\u2019s a line of cars behind you, you\u2019re unlikely to get out and move the obstruction\u2014you don\u2019t want to be a spectacle, and you tell yourself there are others to deal with it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>(Shortform note: Both the bystander effect and social loafing result from a phenomenon called <em>diffusion of responsibility<\/em>,<em> <\/em><a href=\"https:\/\/www.britannica.com\/topic\/bystander-effect\/Diffusion-of-responsibility\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">where the bigger a group is, the less responsibility and motivation to act each person feels<\/a>. Research shows that there\u2019s an exception to this rule if an individual feels that others in the group are unable to help. For example, if you\u2019re on a plane with 100 passengers and someone is having a seizure, you\u2019re unlikely to help unless you\u2019re a doctor with expertise others lack.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>According to McRaney, the consequences of this thought error can be dire<\/strong>\u2014not only does it decrease productivity, but it can lead to dangerous and even fatal outcomes. For example, if no one moves the tree branch, a car could hit it and get into a dangerous accident. McRaney says that to overcome the bystander effect, you should increase your self-awareness\u2014if you\u2019re stalling because others are around, recognize this behavior and <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-push-yourself\/\">push yourself<\/a> to act instead. To avoid slacking off during group work, he recommends <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-set-personal-goals\/\">setting personal goals<\/a> you\u2019ll feel accountable to meet.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>(Shortform note: McRaney offers advice that helps combat the bystander effect and social loafing after you notice them. However, there may be <a href=\"https:\/\/www.psychologytoday.com\/intl\/blog\/happiness-in-this-world\/201006\/the-diffusion-of-responsibility\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">a way to <em>prevent <\/em>the diffusion of responsibility<\/a>, the underlying cause of these thought errors\u2014by adopting the Buddhist doctrine of dependent origin, or <a href=\"https:\/\/tricycle.org\/beginners\/buddhism\/dependent-origination\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">prat\u012btyasamutp\u0101da<\/a>. This doctrine states that everything is interconnected, so someone else\u2019s problem is also your problem. By adopting this mindset, you\u2019ll be less likely to shrug off responsibility as someone else\u2019s because you believe you\u2019re directly involved and thus inherently responsible for helping.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Thought Error 2: Your Crave Conformity<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Next, McRaney explains that we like to believe we\u2019re strong and make autonomous decisions, but<strong> our <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/need-to-belong\/\">desire to fit in<\/a> usually trumps the desire to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/be-sincere\/\">be authentic<\/a> and do the right thing.<\/strong> McRaney explains that this is because of our human instinct for security\u2014when we fit in with others, we feel safe. This can be seen in psychological phenomena such as <em>conformity,<\/em> where we change our beliefs to fit into a group, and <em><a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/causes-of-groupthink\/\">groupthink<\/a>, <\/em>where we reach a consensus in a group without critical thought to avoid disagreements. For example, you\u2019re less likely to voice disagreement in a group setting, more likely to conform to the wishes of a superior, and naturally prone to join groups such as cliques or even cults.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>McRaney says that <strong>these behaviors harm not only yourself but also the collective.<\/strong> Feeling unable to voice your opinions stifles creative thought and could prevent a better idea from coming to light. Failing to question authority could trap people within flawed systems. Your willingness to join a group and share an identity could cause you to lose your sense of personal identity and judgment. To avoid falling prey to this phenomenon, McRaney recommends practicing self-awareness and critical thinking\u2014staying aware of your true thoughts and values (without the influence of others), <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/questioning-authority\/\">questioning authority<\/a> and <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/group-consensus\/\">group consensus<\/a>, and not being afraid to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-speak-your-mind-without-fear\/\">speak your mind<\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>How good are you? Are you at your best when you&#8217;re around others or when you&#8217;re on your own? In You Are Not So Smart, David McRaney reveals fascinating insights about human behavior and self-perception. He explores how our actions change in group settings and why we&#8217;re not as independent-minded as we&#8217;d like to believe. Keep reading to discover why it can be more difficult to maintain your values and motivation when others are around.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":9,"featured_media":136865,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[9,43],"tags":[1681],"class_list":["post-136859","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-psychology","category-self-improvement","tag-you-are-not-so-smart","","tg-column-two"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v24.3 (Yoast SEO v24.3) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>How Good Are You? Perhaps Not as Good as You Think - Shortform Books<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"You probably think you&#039;re a good person. But, if you act differently around others, you might be wrong about how good you are. 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