{"id":133847,"date":"2024-10-17T15:44:54","date_gmt":"2024-10-17T19:44:54","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=133847"},"modified":"2024-10-28T12:23:32","modified_gmt":"2024-10-28T16:23:32","slug":"how-to-live-authentically-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-live-authentically-2\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Live Authentically: 3 Tips for Finding the Courage"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>Do you want to live <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/authentic-living\/\">an authentic life<\/a>? How can you muster up the courage to do so?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Palliative care nurse Bronnie Ware writes in her book <em>The Top Five Regrets of the Dying <\/em>that a lot of courage is required to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/live-without-regrets\/\">live without regrets<\/a>. She shares three tips for how to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/live-authentically\/\">live authentically<\/a> and regret-free.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Below are Ware&#8217;s three tips for finding the courage to live authentically.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<!--more-->\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-finding-the-courage-to-live-authentically\"><strong>Finding the Courage to Live Authentically<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Do you want to know <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/living-authentically\/\">how to live authentically<\/a>? In her book, Ware argues that <strong>living a life without regret requires vigilance, conscious decisions, and a lot of courage. <\/strong>She discovered this herself as she went through her own journey, abandoning a steady job in the banking industry for an unconventional life, pursuing songwriting, and caring for patients as a palliative care nurse.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Here are three of Ware\u2019s tips for finding courage so you can live authentically and regret-free.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-tip-1-accept-death-as-a-normal-part-of-life\"><strong>Tip 1: Accept Death as a Normal Part of Life<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Ware writes that in our society, we avoid thinking and <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/talking-about-death\/\">talking about death<\/a>. Because of this, we often don\u2019t know how to react when we encounter death in our lives\u2014whether we\u2019re facing our own or the death of someone close to us. Ware argues that to live without regret, we must <strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/accept-death\/\">accept death<\/a> as a normal, unavoidable part of life.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Ware says that though it may feel uncomfortable, acknowledging your mortality gives you courage to live without regret: It reminds you to be intentional with your decisions, discern what truly matters, and live each moment in the most fulfilling way possible. You care less about others\u2019 opinions and society\u2019s expectations, and you stop chasing things that don\u2019t make you happy. For example, when you reflect on death, you see that experiences and relationships hold more value than material possessions. In her work, Ware notes that none of her patients ever wished they\u2019d bought or owned more things\u2014they only cared about how they lived and impacted others.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-tip-2-choose-the-right-environment-for-you\"><strong>Tip 2: Choose the Right Environment for You<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>To avoid regret, Ware also recommends <strong>choosing environments that match your goals and values. <\/strong>Your surroundings, such as where you live, work, and spend your time, strongly influence who you become, so you must find the right environments to support you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Ware shares a story about a younger client that illustrates the impact your environment has on your life. After an accident, her client went into an assisted living facility. Ware noticed that before long, the energy and drive her client once had to learn, grow, and interact with the world began to fade. His new surroundings, whether he realized it or not, affected his mood and outlook.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Ware suggests you select the environments that line up with where you want to go in life and leave those that don\u2019t. The right environments can inspire you to grow and be your best, while the wrong environments can make it harder for you to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/making-better-decisions-2\/\">make good choices<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>(Shortform note: In <a href=\"https:\/\/shortform.com\/app\/book\/the-compound-effect\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><em>The Compound Effect<\/em><\/a>, Darren Hardy argues that your environment includes not just your physical surroundings, but also <a href=\"https:\/\/shortform.com\/app\/book\/the-compound-effect\/chapter-5#control-your-environment\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">your mind space<\/a>. To create an environment that helps you <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/steps-to-achieve-your-goals\/\">reach your goals<\/a>, you should clear out both physical clutter and what Hardy calls &#8220;psychic clutter&#8221;\u2014unfinished tasks and unfulfilled commitments that bog you down. He adds that what you allow in your environment tends to multiply, so it&#8217;s important not to accept disrespect, poor health, or other <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/negative-influences\/\">negative influences<\/a>. Protecting your physical, emotional, and mental spaces gives you more peace, creativity, and capacity to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-focus-on-your-goals-and-avoid-distractions\/\">focus on your goals<\/a>.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-tip-3-accept-things-outside-of-your-control\"><strong>Tip 3: Accept Things Outside of Your Control<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Finally, Ware advises you to<strong> accept things you can\u2019t control<\/strong>. Letting go of your need for control allows you to act courageously. If you recognize that you\u2019ll never fully be in control, focus on doing what you can, and trust that things will work out in the end, you\u2019ll find it easier to be happy and make good choices, even if they scare you. For example, you can express yourself honestly, knowing that how others respond is out of your hands.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>To help you accept that you can\u2019t control everything, Ware recommends you practice <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/eckhart-tolle-meditation-mindfulness\/\">meditation<\/a> and <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/compassion-for-yourself\/\">self-compassion<\/a>. First, practice meditation to become more aware of your <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/thoughts-feelings-and-behaviors\/\">thoughts and feelings<\/a>. When you pay more attention to your thoughts, you can notice when you\u2019re having <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-negative-unhelpful-thoughts-set-you-back\/\">unhelpful thoughts<\/a> and replace them with better ones. For example, if you make a <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-avoid-mistakes-at-work\/\">mistake at work<\/a> and start thinking, \u201cI\u2019m a total failure,\u201d meditation can help you recognize this unhelpful thought. You can then replace it with a more balanced view like, \u201cI made a mistake, but that doesn\u2019t define me. I can learn from this and do better next time.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Second, learn to have self-compassion by being kinder and more accepting of yourself. Self-compassion allows you to accept your situation and limitations, rather than fighting reality and berating yourself for what you can\u2019t change. When you\u2019re understanding of yourself, you can make <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/making-hard-decisions\/\">hard decisions<\/a> with less fear. You know that even if things don\u2019t work out perfectly, you\u2019ll treat yourself with kindness instead of self-criticism. This frees you to act with more courage and make decisions you won\u2019t regret.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Do you want to live an authentic life? How can you muster up the courage to do so? Palliative care nurse Bronnie Ware writes in her book The Top Five Regrets of the Dying that a lot of courage is required to live without regrets. She shares three tips for how to live authentically and regret-free. Below are Ware&#8217;s three tips for finding the courage to live authentically.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":8,"featured_media":134158,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[7,43],"tags":[1639],"class_list":["post-133847","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-lifestyle","category-self-improvement","tag-the-top-five-regrets-of-the-dying","","tg-column-two"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v24.3 (Yoast SEO v24.3) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>How to Live Authentically: 3 Tips for Finding the Courage - Shortform Books<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Living authentically takes a lot of courage. Here are three tips from The Top Five Regrets of the Dying on how to do it. 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