{"id":12999,"date":"2020-09-03T17:00:00","date_gmt":"2020-09-03T21:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=12999"},"modified":"2020-09-04T23:21:50","modified_gmt":"2020-09-05T03:21:50","slug":"mysterys-lounge","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/mysterys-lounge\/","title":{"rendered":"Mystery&#8217;s Lounge: The PUA Online Community"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>What is Mystery&#8217;s Lounge? How did Neil Strauss use Mystery&#8217;s Lounge to learn and discuss the PUA lifestyle?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Mystery&#8217;s Lounge was an online forum where PUAs gathered and discussed their techniques, successes, and failures. Mystery&#8217;s Lounge was an important platform for PUAs, and was where many new PUAs were introduced to the community. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Learn more about Mystery&#8217;s Lounge.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<!--more-->\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Learning From The PUAs in Mystery&#8217;s Lounge<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>After returning home from Belgrade, Style posted a call for advice on how to kiss-close on Mystery\u2019s Lounge, an invite-only online seduction message board. Top pickup artists (PUAs) logged onto Mystery\u2019s Lounge to exchange stories, strategies, and sometimes photos and videos.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Style got a range of responses:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\"><li>Follow the three-second rule: Let the conversation stall and look her in the eyes. <strong>If she holds your gaze for three seconds, she wants to kiss.<\/strong>&nbsp;<\/li><li>Have her pick you up for the date and invite her into the house for a few minutes to establish some comfort there. At the end of the night, invite her back to your house, offer a drink, and entertain her for a while. Have her sit on your lap as you show her something on your computer. <strong>Kiss her on the cheek, and usually she\u2019ll turn around and kiss you\u2014if she doesn\u2019t, wait a few minutes and try again.&nbsp;<\/strong><\/li><li>Invite the woman into your house at the end of the date, and ask for a massage for your sore muscles. As she massages, critique her and insist on showing her how to do it. Start by massaging her back, then tell her that you feel tension in her legs and that you give your friends great leg massages. <strong>Massage her legs, and then tell her that her pants are in the way. <\/strong>After she takes her pants off, continue massaging as you gradually work your way up her legs. Presumably, she\u2019ll then consent to having sex.&nbsp;<\/li><li><strong>Get rid of your fear of rejection by convincing yourself that you don\u2019t care about the woman. <\/strong>Think of her as practice so that the stakes are low if you fail. Do something brazen, like telling her to stick her tongue out and then sucking on it. If she gets upset, you both come away with a story to tell at parties.&nbsp;<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p>Style took pieces of advice from the various posts and developed his own, fool-proof routine:&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ol class=\"wp-block-list\"><li><strong>Compliment how she smells. <\/strong>Explain that <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/amazing-sense-of-smell-in-animals\/\">animals smell<\/a> each other before they mate, and that humans are wired to become aroused when someone else smells them.<\/li><li>Slide your hand up the back of her neck, <strong>grab her hair, and pull it. <\/strong>Explain that when lions mate, they bite each other\u2019s mane.&nbsp;<\/li><li>Take her arm and <strong>bite the inside of her elbow in an erotic way. <\/strong>Explain that this is one of the most sensitive areas of the body.<\/li><li><strong>Tell her to bite your neck. <\/strong>If she hesitates, turn away for a few seconds (cat-string theory). Then turn back and tell her again; most likely, she\u2019ll do it.&nbsp;<\/li><li>Critique her bite, then <strong>pull her hair to the side and bite her neck. <\/strong>Afterward, tell her to try again.&nbsp;<\/li><li>Tell her that the second bite was better. Then, <strong>kiss her.<\/strong>&nbsp;<\/li><li><strong>Invite her back to your house at the end of the date. <\/strong>Show her something on your computer, and have her sit on your lap. Kiss the back of her neck until she turns around and kisses you.&nbsp;<\/li><\/ol>\n\n\n\n<p>Just one successful night with his new kiss-close routine pushed Style past his <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-overcome-mental-blocks\/\">mental block<\/a>.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Meanwhile, Mystery was struggling.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Despite his pickup career, he\u2019d had a longtime girlfriend, named Patricia. Initially, Patricia had accepted Mystery\u2019s lifestyle, but now she was ready to settle down. She told Mystery that if they didn\u2019t start moving toward marriage and kids, their relationship was over\u2014so they broke up.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Mystery referred to love as \u201cpairbonding,\u201d which he viewed as an evolutionary mechanism that was meant solely to motivate people to survive and procreate. Still, he was reeling<\/strong> from his breakup. Mystery was now falling victim to his own cat <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/string-theory-explained\/\">string theory<\/a>: He\u2019d taken Patricia for granted until they broke up, and, once she was inaccessible, he could think of nothing else.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The breakup was keeping Mystery up at night. One night, he took several Tylenol pills with codeine. However, they weren\u2019t strong enough to knock him out, and he spent the whole night posting on Mystery\u2019s Lounge.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>On his codeine high, Mystery gushed about how much he loved the seduction community and the friends he\u2019d made there. Mystery wrote about how he wanted the community to be a place where the men could share more than just seduction tips\u2014he wanted them to help each other achieve their life goals.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Mystery put out a request for help in achieving his goal of becoming a professional magician (which he talked about constantly). He wanted to convince a broadcast network to give him a one-hour magic special, which he planned to parlay into an ongoing show in Las Vegas.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>In his codeine ramblings, Mystery wrote that doing daily performances would feed his need for constant attention. This acknowledgment offered some insight into why <strong>Mystery loved the pickup game\u2014because he fed off the attention from women.<\/strong>&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Style Posts a Warning in Mystery&#8217;s Lounge<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p>One day, Style put up a post on Mystery\u2019s Lounge, warning the community of the dangers of becoming a pickup robot.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Style wrote that a social robot:&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\"><li>Never had relationships, despite successful pickups<\/li><li>Was at a loss if he ran out of scripted lines when talking to a woman&nbsp;<\/li><li>Couldn\u2019t talk about a woman without rating her attractiveness<\/li><li>Assumed that any time a woman wasn\u2019t receptive to his lines, that she was testing him<\/li><li>Saw any other man who was talking to a woman as competition<\/li><li>Felt a compulsion <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/sarging-pua-the-game\/\">to sarge<\/a> women in inappropriate settings, such as the workplace<\/li><li>Lost interest in things outside the community, including friends, family, work, and hobbies<\/li><li>Based his self-esteem on his pickup success<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p>Young sargers\u2014those who found the community while in high school or college\u2014were most at risk of becoming a robot, because they were still developing their identities. For these men, <strong>the rules of the game that dictated how they interacted with women became interwoven with their overall social development<\/strong>, which had negative effects:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ol class=\"wp-block-list\"><li>Their social interactions were so driven by strategy that they assumed everyone else operated the same way, which led them to overanalyze other people\u2019s words and actions.&nbsp;<\/li><li>They developed no real interests or hobbies outside the community, so there was no real substance beneath the rote pickup lines and routines. The irony was that<strong> the purpose of the lines was to make men <em>appear<\/em> interesting, but the social robots\u2019 obsession with the game prevented them from <em>being<\/em> interesting, which was the most effective way of <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-attract-women\/\">attracting women<\/a><\/strong>.&nbsp;<\/li><\/ol>\n\n\n\n<p>Mystery&#8217;s Lounge was formed as a place for PUAs to gather and learn from each other. Style used Mystery&#8217;s Lounge to learn and later to inform other PUAs. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>What is Mystery&#8217;s Lounge? How did Neil Strauss use Mystery&#8217;s Lounge to learn and discuss the PUA lifestyle? Mystery&#8217;s Lounge was an online forum where PUAs gathered and discussed their techniques, successes, and failures. Mystery&#8217;s Lounge was an important platform for PUAs, and was where many new PUAs were introduced to the community. Learn more about Mystery&#8217;s Lounge.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":13046,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[34,7],"tags":[118],"class_list":["post-12999","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-communication","category-lifestyle","tag-the-game","","tg-column-two"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v24.3 (Yoast SEO v24.3) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Mystery&#039;s Lounge: The PUA Online Community - Shortform Books<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"What is Mystery&#039;s Lounge? This online forum was a way for PUAs to talk to one another and was important to the community. 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Here&#039;s why.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/mysterys-lounge\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Shortform Books\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2020-09-03T21:00:00+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2020-09-05T03:21:50+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/s3.amazonaws.com\/wordpress.shortform.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/08\/mysterys-lounge-the-game-scaled.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"2560\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"1707\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Carrie Cabral\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Carrie Cabral\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"6 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/mysterys-lounge\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/mysterys-lounge\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Carrie Cabral\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/2ababb7c63a94ff5d2190f71dc417d56\"},\"headline\":\"Mystery&#8217;s Lounge: The PUA Online Community\",\"datePublished\":\"2020-09-03T21:00:00+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2020-09-05T03:21:50+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/mysterys-lounge\/\"},\"wordCount\":1223,\"commentCount\":0,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/#organization\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/mysterys-lounge\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/08\/mysterys-lounge-the-game-scaled.jpg\",\"keywords\":[\"The Game\"],\"articleSection\":[\"Communication\",\"Lifestyle\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/mysterys-lounge\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/mysterys-lounge\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/mysterys-lounge\/\",\"name\":\"Mystery's Lounge: The PUA Online Community - Shortform Books\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/mysterys-lounge\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/mysterys-lounge\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/08\/mysterys-lounge-the-game-scaled.jpg\",\"datePublished\":\"2020-09-03T21:00:00+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2020-09-05T03:21:50+00:00\",\"description\":\"What is Mystery's Lounge? 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