{"id":12997,"date":"2020-09-01T09:34:20","date_gmt":"2020-09-01T13:34:20","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=12997"},"modified":"2020-09-04T23:20:51","modified_gmt":"2020-09-05T03:20:51","slug":"how-to-pick-up-women","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-pick-up-women\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Pick Up Women: Techniques from The Game"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

How did Neil Strauss learn how to pick up women in the book The Game: Penetrating the Secret Society of Pickup Artists<\/em>? Was he successful?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Neil Strauss learned how to pick up women by immersing himself into the PUA community. Strauss learned several strategies from several different gurus. Here are some of the lessons he learned on how to pick up women.<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n

How to Pick Up Women: Mystery’s Strategy<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Neil Strauss dove headfirst into the seduction community and quickly learned how to pick up women. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mystery developed techniques that incorporated magic with the lessons he\u2019d learned. His strategy\u2014which he dubbed the Mystery Method\u2014broke down into these steps: <\/p>\n\n\n\n

  1. Walk into the club with a smile. <\/strong>A smile indicates that you\u2019re confident, fun, and, above all, an alpha male. <\/li>
  2. Select a target <\/strong>(a woman you want to seduce) in a group. <\/strong>Don\u2019t pick up women who are standing alone. <\/li>
  3. Follow the three-second rule: When you see a woman you\u2019re interested in, approach her within three seconds. <\/strong>If you wait longer, you risk either overthinking it or staring at her too long and looking like a creep. <\/li>
  4. Approach the group confidently and start conversation <\/strong>with a scripted pickup line, such as, \u201cIt looks like the party\u2019s over here\u201d or \u201cDid you see those two girls fighting outside?\u201d The lines are simple; they\u2019re just meant to get people talking. <\/li>
  5. Ignore your target. <\/strong>Instead, make her friends like you\u2014especially anyone who would be likely to try to interfere with your pickup attempt (such as male friends). Winning over the group makes you seem like the life of the party, while ignoring your target makes her more eager for your attention. <\/li>
  6. Further provoke your target with a neg, which is a backhanded compliment or vague insult<\/strong>\u2014for example, offer her gum after she talks, or tell her that her hair would look better if it were up\/down. The neg reinforces your lack of interest and further injures the woman\u2019s self-esteem.<\/li>
  7. Isolate your target. <\/strong>Use an excuse to get her away from the group, such as saying that you want to show her something. <\/li>
  8. Look for indicators of interest (IOIs). <\/strong>For example, if she asks you a question about yourself, or if you squeeze her hands and she squeezes back. <\/li>
  9. Demonstrate an interesting skill<\/strong>, like a magic trick or an ESP test, to impress and intrigue her. <\/li>
  10. Once you get three IOIs, try to get her to kiss you <\/strong>by saying, \u201cWould you like to kiss me?\u201d This question is fool-proof: If she says, \u201cyes,\u201d you get a kiss (PUAs call this a kiss-close). If she says, \u201cmaybe,\u201d you can say, \u201clet\u2019s find out,\u201d and go in for a kiss. If she says, \u201cno,\u201d then you can deflect and say that you weren\u2019t asking for one. <\/li>
  11. Keep her wanting more. <\/strong>Create a false time constraint and say that you have to leave, but that you\u2019d like to continue this another time. At this point, she should give you her number (PUAs call this a number-close<\/a>). <\/li><\/ol>\n\n\n\n

    In The Game<\/em>, to pick up women was the only marker of success. Mystery\u2019s whole strategy was designed to pick up women subtly. Rather than coming on directly and forcefully, Mystery instructed men to take their time and build the anticipation so that the woman would want<\/em> to be hit on.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Mystery had developed countless theories and principles that dictated his tactics while sarging<\/a> in the field (while hitting on women). The strategies were all meant to make the PUA seem like the most interesting person in the room, while simultaneously appearing disinterested in the woman he was hitting on, so that she<\/em> would essentially pursue him<\/em>.<\/strong> <\/p>\n\n\n\n

    In The Game<\/em>, to pick up women meant you had to follow some rules. The main one was that PUAs don\u2019t do what everyone else does. For example, if every man in the club was gawking at a particularly beautiful woman, the PUA practically ignored her. When the PUA did approach the woman, he never acknowledged her beauty\u2014he may have even subtly downplayed it. The effect was that the PUA stood out among the crowd. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Two dominant theories balanced the goals of standing out and laying back: <\/p>\n\n\n\n

    1. Peacock theory stated that men should take a cue from peacocks and make themselves eye-catching in order to attract desirable women. <\/strong>This involved wearing loud, colorful clothes and accessories, such as bright or shiny shirts, outlandish hats, and light-up jewelry. <\/li>
    2. Cat string theory<\/a> <\/strong>proposed that women act the same way with men as cats did with string: A cat would chase a string feverishly when it was just out of reach, but if the string dropped right in front of the cat, the cat instantly lost interest. This was why PUAs had to avoid appearing too eager or available.<\/strong> <\/li><\/ol>\n\n\n\n

      Per cat string theory, Mystery advocated an indirect approach. He advised students to: <\/p>\n\n\n\n