{"id":119517,"date":"2023-12-14T11:04:00","date_gmt":"2023-12-14T15:04:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=119517"},"modified":"2023-12-18T11:14:19","modified_gmt":"2023-12-18T15:14:19","slug":"how-to-avoid-toxic-coworkers","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-avoid-toxic-coworkers\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Avoid Toxic Coworkers (or Minimize Interactions)"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Are there people who are making your work life miserable? Have you considered changing jobs just to get away from them?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Your work time constitutes a big chunk of your life. The people you work with can make this time pleasant and productive or difficult and distracting. In The Asshole Survival Guide<\/em>, Robert I. Sutton offers practical advice on how to avoid toxic coworkers or reduce your interactions with them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Read more for strategies that can vastly improve your work life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n

Approach #1: Remove Yourself Entirely From the Jerk\u2019s Environment <\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Sutton argues that one of the best ways to deal with chronic jerk behavior is to get away from the person entirely.<\/strong> His advice on how to avoid toxic coworkers includes moving to a different company, moving to a different location, or switching jobs within the same company so you\u2019re under a different boss. Being entirely out of the jerk\u2019s orbit prevents you from experiencing damaging encounters with them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(Shortform note: When deciding whether to switch jobs, consider making a pros and cons list of all the good and bad traits of the job.<\/a> If the bad outweighs the good, it\u2019s time to leave. Then, write a list of attributes you want from a new job\u2014you don\u2019t want to jump from one pool of jerks to another. For example, you might write characteristics you\u2019d want coworkers to have or what you think an ideal company culture<\/a> looks like. Finally, create a plan<\/a> for your exit that includes how you\u2019ll manage financially after quitting, whether you\u2019re quitting before or after you find a new job, and the method you\u2019ll use to resign.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Strategy: Avoid Forming New Professional Connections With Jerks<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Sutton argues that when possible, you should avoid entering into connections with jerks in the first place.<\/strong> If you\u2019re never involved with them, you don\u2019t have to go through the trouble of confronting them or planning a careful escape. Additionally, you don\u2019t have to experience the emotional stress of engaging with them. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

To avoid jerks, pay attention to how new business connections\u2014whether they\u2019re potential coworkers, bosses, clients, and so on\u2014interact with and talk about the people they already work with. If they\u2019re respectful to both you and their existing colleagues, they\u2019ll likely be fine later on. However, if they\u2019re nice to you but rude, condescending, or dismissive toward other people, they\u2019ll probably eventually turn on you too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(Shortform note: A job interview can be a good chance to assess for red flags that point to possible jerk behavior.<\/a> If there are multiple interviewers, pay attention to how they interact with each other. If they interrupt each other, contradict each other, or try to dominate the conversation, they may be jerks (even if they\u2019re nice to you). Additionally, watch out for offensive questions. If the interview questions are inappropriate, it\u2019s a solid indicator that bad behavior is tolerated throughout the company. For example, asking a woman if she plans on having children soon might demonstrate a culture of sexism in which it\u2019s assumed that a woman\u2019s job performance is negatively affected by having children.) <\/p>\n\n\n\n

You can also tell if someone\u2019s a jerk by talking to people who have worked with them before.<\/strong> If those people have a lot of negative things to say about working with the person in question, then it\u2019s best to avoid entering into a new professional relationship with them.   <\/p>\n\n\n\n

(Shortform note: Before you judge someone\u2019s character based on anyone else\u2019s opinion, determine whether you can trust the point of view of the person you\u2019re listening to. If this person often has bad things to say about other people, they may not be the most reliable source. If possible, ask someone who generally shows compassion, empathy, and respect toward others.<\/a> Also, find someone who\u2019s honest even when the information they\u2019re relaying is hard to hear. Finally, the person should be someone who doesn\u2019t typically spread rumors and negativity. With these qualities combined, you can feel comfortable knowing they\u2019ll provide a fair assessment of what it\u2019s like to work with the potential new contact.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Approach #2: Reduce Your Interactions With the Jerk<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Sometimes, it\u2019s too difficult to avoid a jerk entirely\u2014for example, maybe you can\u2019t afford to switch jobs. In such cases, Sutton suggests reducing your interactions with the jerk as much as possible.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

(Shortform note: Even if switching jobs feels<\/em> impossible because of your financial situation or something else, that doesn\u2019t mean it actually is. If you\u2019re worried about quitting because you live paycheck to paycheck, remember that you don\u2019t have to leave your current job before applying for a new one.<\/a> It might take some night and weekend work to search for open positions, but it\u2019s only temporary. Additionally, consider that your precarious financial situation can be an incentive<\/a><\/em> to quit\u2014if your current job doesn\u2019t pay you enough and exposes you to jerks, you have good reasons to find something better.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Strategy: Separate Yourself From the Jerk Physically<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Sutton argues that if you have to work with a jerk, you should create as much physical distance from them as possible.<\/strong> Research shows that this works because you\u2019re much more likely to interact with someone using all forms of communication if they\u2019re physically closer to you. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Therefore, if you distance yourself from a jerk, you won\u2019t have to engage with them as much, and they\u2019ll have a lesser effect on your mental well-being. It\u2019ll also be less likely that their jerk behavior will rub off on you. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

(Shortform note: One way to distance yourself physically from a jerk is switching to a remote or hybrid mode of work.<\/a> You can better control the pace, format, and timing of the interactions you have with the jerk when working remotely. This allows you to limit the length and type of exposure you have to the jerk, meaning they\u2019ll have less power over you and you\u2019ll generally communicate less. Along with protecting your mental health, the reduced interruptions and separation from office politics that typically come with remote work can improve your productivity and focus.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The farther you can move away from the jerk, the better\u2014try working in a different building, on a different floor, or on the other side of the office. At the very least, move your desk so you\u2019re not in their immediate vicinity.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(Shortform note: If you can\u2019t separate from the jerk by leaving the office, you\u2019ll likely need to speak with your supervisor about moving your working space. First, see if there are any empty desks available<\/a>\u2014that could be an easy fix. If not, ask your other coworkers if any of them are willing to switch seats with you. They might not have the same issues with the jerk you\u2019re trying to avoid. When you find someone willing to switch or find an empty seat, make sure to get your supervisor\u2019s final approval before moving. Find a time when they aren\u2019t busy, and explain why you think you\u2019d be able to work more effectively and get more done in the new spot.)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Are there people who are making your work life miserable? Have you considered changing jobs just to get away from them? Your work time constitutes a big chunk of your life. The people you work with can make this time pleasant and productive or difficult and distracting. In The Asshole Survival Guide, Robert I. Sutton offers practical advice on how to avoid toxic coworkers or reduce your interactions with them. Read more for strategies that can vastly improve your work life.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":9,"featured_media":119523,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29,9,30],"tags":[1348],"class_list":["post-119517","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-career","category-psychology","category-work","tag-the-asshole-survival-guide","","tg-column-two"],"yoast_head":"\nHow to Avoid Toxic Coworkers (or Minimize Interactions) - Shortform Books<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Organizational psychologist Robert I. Sutton offers practical advice on how to avoid toxic coworkers or reduce exposure to them. 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