{"id":110083,"date":"2023-08-08T11:02:00","date_gmt":"2023-08-08T15:02:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=110083"},"modified":"2026-01-22T13:57:06","modified_gmt":"2026-01-22T17:57:06","slug":"make-your-happiness-a-priority","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/make-your-happiness-a-priority\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Make Your Happiness a Priority as a Leader"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>Why should you make your happiness a priority? Why are leaders better when they&#8217;re happier on and off the job?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>The 15 Commitments of Conscious Leadership<\/em> says that the best leaders are ones that prioritize happiness and positivity. Doing so will help you avoid stress, increase your energy, and maximize your effectiveness.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Here are a few methods for prioritizing happiness and positivity.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<!--more-->\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-method-1-find-contentment-within-yourself\">Method #1: Find Contentment Within Yourself<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>The authors explain that <strong>many leaders struggle to feel happy in life because, like many humans, they believe they lack three things: <\/strong>safety, acceptance, and power. They, therefore, seek these three things externally\u2014for instance, they try to gain safety by acquiring financial power over others, or they prioritize getting rich so they can feel accepted by their community.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>However, believing you lack these factors and chasing them externally doesn\u2019t help you make your happiness a priority. Instead, it causes dissatisfaction, stress, and suffering. This is because true contentment comes from recognizing you already <em>have<\/em> these things within you\u2014you don\u2019t \u201clack\u201d anything at all.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Finding contentment within is the only way to achieve authentic, long-lasting happiness. <\/strong>To do so, acknowledge the external factors you seek (such as power over others or wealth), and then simply release these wants\u2014try to exist in the moment as a person with no wants. Once you reach this state, acknowledge that you and your life are enough: It was only your <em>wants<\/em> that caused dissatisfaction. Once you release wants, you can feel content just with yourself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-table\"><table><tbody><tr><td><strong>Achieve Fulfillment by Becoming One with Your <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/inner-self-meaning\/\">Inner Self<\/a><\/strong><br><br>In <a href=\"https:\/\/shortform.com\/app\/book\/a-new-earth\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><em>A New Earth<\/em><\/a>, Eckhart Tolle agrees that humans struggle to find happiness because they try to mitigate feelings of lack by seeking external factors like wealth and power. <a href=\"https:\/\/shortform.com\/app\/book\/a-new-earth\/1-page-summary#the-root-of-human-dysfunction\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">He elaborates that these feelings of lack stem from our ego, which has an underlying fear of never being enough<\/a>\u2014safe enough, accepted enough, powerful enough, and so on.&nbsp;Tolle explains we seek to fulfill these needs externally because our ego mitigates feelings of lack by <em>inflating our self-image<\/em> and <em>gaining superiority<\/em> over others. For example, the fancier your house is, or the more powerful position you have at work, the more \u201cfull\u201d you\u2019ll feel. However, like the authors of <em>15 Commitments<\/em>, Tolle argues that <a href=\"https:\/\/shortform.com\/app\/book\/a-new-earth\/1-page-summary#the-current-state-of-humanity\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">searching for fulfillment externally (living in a state of what he calls \u201cobject consciousness\u201d) only causes you more suffering<\/a> because no matter how much you inflate your image, there will always be someone who\u2019s better than you. <br><br>This leads to what Tolle calls an \u201cendless cycle of wanting,\u201d in which you\u2019ll never reach happiness because there&#8217;s always something \u201cmore\u201d you\u2019ll need to gain to achieve it.&nbsp;Similarly to the authors of <em>15 Commitments<\/em>, Tolle argues<em> <\/em>that the only way to find contentment is to break free from your feelings of wanting\u2014a process that he calls <a href=\"https:\/\/shortform.com\/app\/book\/a-new-earth\/1-page-summary#mindfulness\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">becoming one with your inner self, or your \u201cpure consciousness.\u201d<\/a><strong> <\/strong>We achieve this state by reaching a state of <em>being<\/em> or <em>presence<\/em>.<strong> <\/strong>Tolle says <a href=\"https:\/\/shortform.com\/app\/book\/a-new-earth#the-consciousness-evolution\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><em>being<\/em> has three components:<\/a><em>&nbsp;<\/em><br><br><strong>1) Nonattachment:<em> <\/em><\/strong>When we no longer form <em>attachments<\/em> to things, we\u2019ll no longer generate greed, consumerism, and pollution caused by the <em>endless cycle of wanting<\/em>.&nbsp;<br><br><strong>2) Nonjudgement:<\/strong><em> <\/em>When we no longer <em>judge<\/em> things as \u201cright and wrong\u201d or \u201cgood and bad,\u201d we\u2019ll no longer have <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/impossible-expectations\/\">unrealistic expectations<\/a> that cause disappointment, anger, resentment, and other forms of suffering (for instance, if we judge something as \u201cgood\u201d and it turns out to be \u201cbad\u201d).<br><br><strong>3) Nonresistance:<\/strong> Consequently, we\u2019ll <em>cease resisting<\/em> what simply <em>is<\/em> and can\u2019t be changed. The authors of <em>15 Commitments <\/em>recommend adopting nonattachment in this section (releasing wants), and nonresistance in the next section (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-go-with-the-flow\/\">going with the flow<\/a>). They also recommend a process similar to nonjudgement when discussing how to take accountability\u2014viewing any situation as neither good nor bad, right nor wrong, but just as something that <em>is.<\/em>&nbsp;<\/td><\/tr><\/tbody><\/table><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-method-2-have-fun-and-go-with-the-flow\">Method #2: Have Fun and Go With the Flow<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>The authors explain that<strong> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/have-more-fun\/\">having fun<\/a> and going with the flow also helps you feel more happy and more content in life.<\/strong> <em>Having fun<\/em> (what the authors call \u201cplay\u201d) involves making time to do seemingly meaningless activities for the sake of enjoyment. <em>Going with the flow <\/em>means accepting rather than resisting uncontrollable circumstances in your life\u2014acknowledging that they happen, and deciding how to move forward with creativity and flexibility to joyfully build upon what life gave you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>(Shortform note: When defining play and discussing its benefits, the authors cite the research of Stuart Brown, a psychiatrist and play researcher who founded the <a href=\"http:\/\/www.nifplay.org\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">National Institute for Play<\/a>. According to Brown\u2019s research, play not only improves people\u2019s physical and <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/emotional-health-and-well-being\/\">emotional well-being<\/a> but is also fundamental to healthy human development. His research shows a link between a lack of childhood play (or play deprivation) and a future propensity to violence and other antisocial behaviors. Brown argues that <a href=\"https:\/\/www.npr.org\/transcripts\/395065944\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">healthy play is a means of developing important social-emotional skills<\/a> and preventing potentially violent antisocial behavior.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-method-3-actively-change-things-you-dislike\">Method #3: Actively Change Things You Dislike<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>The authors explain that <strong>taking action to change things that you find unsatisfactory is key to developing a <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-have-a-positive-mindset\/\">positive mindset<\/a><\/strong>. Many people see flaws in the world around them\u2014whether in their relationships, their work, or society at large\u2014and complain rather than taking action to improve things. This encourages the negative belief that things are imperfect and always will be. Instead, view imperfections as things you <em>can <\/em>change and opportunities to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/hub\/society-culture\/how-to-make-the-world-a-better-place\/\">make the world a better place<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-table\"><table><tbody><tr><td><strong>Achieve <em>Lasting <\/em>Positivity by Addressing the Underlying Issue: The Negativity Instinct<\/strong><br><br>The authors\u2019 recommendation to view flaws in the world as opportunities for change may encourage a more positive outlook temporarily. However, it might not be enough to instill <em>lasting<\/em> positivity due to a phenomenon called the <em>negativity instinct. <\/em>As Hans Rosling explains<em> <\/em>in <a href=\"https:\/\/shortform.com\/app\/book\/factfulness\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><em>Factfulness<\/em><\/a>, this instinct <a href=\"https:\/\/shortform.com\/app\/book\/factfulness\/2\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">convinces us that the world is fundamentally bad and getting worse<\/a>.&nbsp;Because of the negativity instinct, even if you successfully manage to instill positive change in one aspect of the world around you, you\u2019ll likely keep seeing more and more apparent flaws in need of change. In turn, this may trigger a more pessimistic outlook\u2014you\u2019ll see problems everywhere, and you\u2019ll know that nobody could possibly solve them <em>all<\/em>. You may feel that trying to improve the world around you is a lost cause.<br><br>To overcome the negativity instinct and adopt a more permanent positive outlook, Rosling recommends <a href=\"https:\/\/shortform.com\/app\/book\/factfulness\/2#overcoming-the-negativity-instinct\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">focusing on ways in which the world has improved, seeking out positive news, and not romanticizing the past<\/a> (which we often view as a \u201cbetter time\u201d due to rose-tinted nostalgia).<\/td><\/tr><\/tbody><\/table><\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Why should you make your happiness a priority? Why are leaders better when they&#8217;re happier on and off the job? The 15 Commitments of Conscious Leadership says that the best leaders are ones that prioritize happiness and positivity. Doing so will help you avoid stress, increase your energy, and maximize your effectiveness. Here are a few methods for prioritizing happiness and positivity.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":14,"featured_media":71968,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[7,14,43],"tags":[1120],"class_list":["post-110083","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-lifestyle","category-management","category-self-improvement","tag-the-15-commitments-of-conscious-leadership","","tg-column-two"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v24.3 (Yoast SEO v24.3) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>How to Make Your Happiness a Priority as a Leader - Shortform Books<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Even if you have a lot on your plate, you can&#039;t forget about your well-being. Make your happiness a priority with these mood-boosting methods.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/make-your-happiness-a-priority\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"How to Make Your Happiness a Priority as a Leader\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Even if you have a lot on your plate, you can&#039;t forget about your well-being. 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