{"id":109136,"date":"2023-07-21T15:13:00","date_gmt":"2023-07-21T19:13:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=109136"},"modified":"2023-07-26T08:47:08","modified_gmt":"2023-07-26T12:47:08","slug":"how-to-tell-if-someone-is-uncomfortable","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-tell-if-someone-is-uncomfortable\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Tell if Someone Is Uncomfortable: 3 Body Language Cues"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>What are some common uncomfortable <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/body-language-crucial-conversations\/\">body language<\/a> cues? What might you be able to tell by observing their arms and feet?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Joe Navarro, a retired FBI Special Agent, is no stranger to people feeling uncomfortable around him. Over time, he realized that certain subtle behaviors pointed to uneasiness. In <em>The Dictionary of Body Language<\/em>, he shares three cues for identifying discomfort in somebody\u2019s body language.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Keep reading to learn how to tell if someone is uncomfortable by observing their actions.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<!--more-->\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-uncomfortable-body-language\">Uncomfortable Body Language<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>In the FBI, Navarro learned how to tell if someone is uncomfortable. In his book, he notes that body language that displays discomfort or aversion is typically closed and defensive, indicating that someone feels the need to protect themselves or step away from the situation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>(Shortform note: According to Jack Schafer and Marvin Karlins in <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/app\/book\/the-like-switch\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><em>The Like Switch<\/em><\/a>, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/app\/book\/the-like-switch\/1-page-summary#spotting-unfriendly-cues\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">many people adopt closed defensive body language without realizing it.<\/a> When we do this, it can limit our ability to make friends and new connections\u2014if our body language communicates \u201cdon\u2019t approach,\u201d others will typically follow that directive. If you have trouble making new friends, take time to observe your own body language to determine if that may be a barrier.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Navarro offers the following uncomfortable body language cues.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-action-1-folding-the-arms-across-the-torso\">Action #1: Folding the Arms Across the Torso<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>According to the author, people often fold their arms together and hold them against their torso as if they\u2019re giving themselves a hug\u2014this can be a way to soothe mild discomfort, and it may not indicate distress.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>(Shortform note: According to some researchers, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.lifehack.org\/331914\/how-crossing-your-arms-and-legs-can-change-your-brain\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">crossing our arms is comforting because it synchronizes the left and right hemispheres of the brain<\/a>, allowing them to work together more effectively. They add that bringing both arms across the midline of our body makes us feel calmer and helps us think more clearly.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>However, this posture can also suggest that someone\u2019s trying to protect themselves because they feel unsure or unsafe. Folded arms cover the soft front torso, which contains many of the most important and vulnerable internal organs. Therefore, when we feel unsafe, we instinctively seek to protect this area.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>(Shortform note: In addition to folding their arms in front of them, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.healthline.com\/health\/body-language#breathing\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">people might hold something such as a bag against their torso<\/a> when feeling threatened. This adds a further barrier between the vulnerable part of their body and the perceived threat.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-action-2-positioning-a-fist-in-front-of-the-throat\">Action #2: Positioning a Fist in Front of the Throat<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>According to Navarro, when people make a fist and put it in front of their throat, they\u2019re demonstrating fear and discomfort. The gesture is defensive, protecting the soft, vulnerable part of the throat from perceived danger.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>(Shortform note: <a href=\"https:\/\/www.psychologytoday.com\/us\/blog\/let-their-words-do-the-talking\/201411\/9-subtle-signs-someones-lying-you#:~:text=and%20it%27s%20one%20of%20the%20most%20vulnerable,sometimes%20cover%20their%20suprasternal\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">The soft part at the base of our throat is vulnerable because any injury to it could affect our ability to breathe.<\/a> According to Jack Schafer of <a href=\"https:\/\/shortform.com\/app\/book\/the-like-switch\/1-page-summary\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><em>The Like Switch<\/em><\/a>, covering this part of the body can be an indicator of lying as well as general discomfort\u2014liars often do this gesture when they\u2019re afraid of being discovered.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-action-3-angling-the-feet-away-from-someone\">Action #3: Angling the Feet Away From Someone<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Navarro states that people often angle their feet away from someone they don\u2019t like. In social situations, this is a reliable indicator of people\u2019s true feelings, even if they\u2019re smiling and being polite.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>(Shortform note: Knowledge of this cue can be helpful in understanding the dynamics of group settings, including in the workplace. <a href=\"https:\/\/www.linkedin.com\/business\/learning\/blog\/productivity-tips\/want-to-know-how-someone-is-really-feeling-look-at-their-feet\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">If you\u2019re in a meeting, for example, observe where other people\u2019s feet are pointing<\/a>\u2014whoever has the most feet pointed toward them at any time is likely the person people agree with the most. When a group is debating ideas, this will be a good indicator of whose suggestion they\u2019ll choose.)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>What are some common uncomfortable body language cues? What might you be able to tell by observing their arms and feet? Joe Navarro, a retired FBI Special Agent, is no stranger to people feeling uncomfortable around him. Over time, he realized that certain subtle behaviors pointed to uneasiness. In The Dictionary of Body Language, he shares three cues for identifying discomfort in somebody\u2019s body language. Keep reading to learn how to tell if someone is uncomfortable by observing their actions.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":9,"featured_media":9817,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[34,9],"tags":[1110],"class_list":["post-109136","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-communication","category-psychology","tag-the-dictionary-of-body-language","","tg-column-two"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v24.3 (Yoast SEO v24.3) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>How to Tell if Someone Is Uncomfortable: 3 Body Language Cues - Shortform Books<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Retired FBI Special Agent Joe Navarro sure knows how to tell if someone is uncomfortable. 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