{"id":108523,"date":"2023-07-12T12:41:00","date_gmt":"2023-07-12T16:41:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/?p=108523"},"modified":"2023-07-20T14:56:40","modified_gmt":"2023-07-20T18:56:40","slug":"gabor-mate-scattered-minds-quotes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/gabor-mate-scattered-minds-quotes\/","title":{"rendered":"The Best Gabor Mat\u00e9 Scattered Minds Quotes About ADHD"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>What are the best quotes from <em>Scattered Minds<\/em>? What can you take away about the development of ADHD from these quotes?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Gabor Mat\u00e9 is an internationally renowned family doctor with expertise in childhood development and the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/impacts-of-trauma\/\">impacts of trauma<\/a> on health. He argues that understanding the social and psychological roots of ADHD can help you treat it in your child without medication.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Take a look at Gabor Mat\u00e9&#8217;s <em>Scattered Mind<\/em> quotes with context.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<!--more-->\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-quotes-from-scattered-minds\">Quotes From <em>Scattered Minds<\/em><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>In his 1999 book <em>Scattered Minds<\/em>, physician Gabor Mat\u00e9 argues that if you have ADHD, it\u2019s because early childhood stress prevented you from developing the emotional-cognitive capacities you need to thrive in our world. Further, since ADHD isn\u2019t <em>just <\/em>a biological disorder but one with social and psychological roots, he argues that medication isn\u2019t the best or only way to treat your ADHD. Based on this perspective, he prescribes non-pharmaceutical treatments for both adults and children with ADHD and explains how society can prevent ADHD in future generations.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Here we&#8217;ll look at Gabor Mat\u00e9&#8217;s <em>Scattered Minds<\/em> quotes that best reflect his ideas.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote is-layout-flow wp-block-quote-is-layout-flow\"><p>\u201cWe think that children act, whereas what they mostly do is react. Parents who realize this acquire a powerful tool. By noticing their own responses to the child, rather than fixating on the child\u2019s responses to them, they free up tremendous energy for growth.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Many children with ADHD exhibit defiance\u2014an automatic reflex where the child rejects the parent\u2019s demands, expectations, or instructions<\/strong>\u2014and parents struggle to deal with that defiance without escalating the conflict.<strong> <\/strong>Mat\u00e9 explains that defiance is healthy to some extent\u2014by defying you, your child sets herself apart as an individual, which is an important part of her development. Defiance is especially common in teenagers because it\u2019s developmentally important for them to begin feeling more independent.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Mat\u00e9 suggests taking the following steps whenever your child is defiant: First, encourage your child to express their feelings, and validate those feelings even if your child isn\u2019t going to get their way. Second, decide whether it\u2019s worth enforcing your rules in this case\u2014is it something trivial or a matter of their safety or well-being? Third, refuse to engage in a power struggle\u2014it\u2019s not about overpowering or imposing your will on them but getting your child to cooperate with you. Finally\u2014and most importantly\u2014<strong>after a disagreement, take the initiative to reconnect with your child as soon as possible<\/strong>. This reaffirms your perfect acceptance of your child: They know that no matter what they do, your relationship can\u2019t be damaged beyond repair.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote is-layout-flow wp-block-quote-is-layout-flow\"><p>\u201cSo self-acceptance does not mean self-admiration or even self-liking at every moment of our lives, but tolerance for all our emotions, including those that make us feel uncomfortable.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Accept yourself, including your <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-deal-with-difficult-emotions\/\">difficult emotions<\/a> and any behaviors you engage in but don\u2019t necessarily approve of.<\/strong> Many people with ADHD struggle with self-esteem because they feel their condition holds them back from achieving their goals and getting others\u2019 approval. You may even feel like there\u2019s something innately wrong with you, which Mat\u00e9 attributes to the shame you felt every time the bond between you and your parents was ruptured. To gain self-acceptance, remind yourself that you\u2019re doing your best and that healing is a journey\u2014it\u2019s okay if you\u2019re not where you\u2019d like to be yet.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Attend therapy.<\/strong> Mat\u00e9 explains that people have a deep-seated psychological <em>need <\/em>for <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/stop-seeking-validation\/\">validation from others<\/a>, especially when they\u2019re in pain. He says that a family therapist can provide you with that validation, help you understand your <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/healing-emotional-pain-eckhart-tolle-emotions\/\">emotional pain<\/a>, and support you in learning new psychological skills that can help you thrive.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Practice mindfulness.<\/strong> According to Mat\u00e9, mindfulness improves your neurological capacity to focus; in addition, it may have other psychological benefits, like spiritual fulfillment, that help you heal the emotional pain that underlies your ADHD. He specifically recommends mindfulness <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/eckhart-tolle-meditation-mindfulness\/\">meditation<\/a> but notes that mindfulness can be incorporated into a vast array of activities, like spending <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/the-benefits-of-time-in-nature\/\">time in nature<\/a>.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Prioritize restorative recreation.<\/strong> Many people with ADHD overwork themselves as an outlet for their hyperactivity, but Mat\u00e9 says that in the long run, this only increases your stress. Instead, you should give yourself time to play, explore, and rest. For example, you might take up a creative hobby like crochet.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote is-layout-flow wp-block-quote-is-layout-flow\"><p>\u201cThere are two possibilities why your memories of childhood are so hazy,\u201d I suggest to people. \u201cEither nothing happened worth remembering, or too much happened that may be hurtful for you to recall.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n<p>Based on anecdotal evidence from his life and the lives of his patients, Mat\u00e9 believes that <strong>the psychosocial basis of ADHD is early childhood stress.<\/strong>&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Mat\u00e9 says that early childhood stress includes obvious stressors like neglect, abuse, or separation from your parents\u2014<strong>but if you\u2019re genetically predisposed to be highly sensitive, you were probably stressed by even the most subtly negative social interactions<\/strong>.<strong> <\/strong>Your parents may have been very loving and attentive toward you, but if they were stressed themselves, your home may have had an imperceptibly tense emotional atmosphere. Your sensitive temperament gave you greater, unconscious awareness of that tension\u2014for example, on some level you may have noticed that your parents didn\u2019t smile at you often enough. As a result, you became stressed too, even if you weren\u2019t consciously aware that you <em>felt <\/em>stressed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>According to Mat\u00e9,<strong> early childhood stress is harmful because it ruptures the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.shortform.com\/blog\/how-to-bond-with-your-child\/\">parent-child bond<\/a><\/strong>\u2014the set of consistently positive interactions (and resulting positive feelings) that occur between a parent and child.<strong> <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote is-layout-flow wp-block-quote-is-layout-flow\"><p>\u201cI do not believe AD[H]D leads to creativity any more than creativity causes AD[H]D. Rather, they both originate in the same inborn trait: sensitivity.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n<p>Mat\u00e9 says that <strong>the genetic basis of ADHD is a sensitive temperament, which predisposes you to ADHD by making you more susceptible to environmental stress. <\/strong>If you inherited a sensitive temperament, you\u2019re biologically primed to readily pick up on <em>and <\/em>have more intense reactions to physical and emotional stimuli.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>According to Mat\u00e9, sensitivity can be advantageous\u2014since you\u2019re more attuned to the world around you, you take notice of the world\u2019s most subtle complexities, and you\u2019re given to feelings like awe, wonder, and appreciation. With those strengths under your belt, you could fill an important creative or spiritual role in society.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>But sensitivity can also be disadvantageous because it makes you more likely to be <em>negatively <\/em>affected by your environment. For example, Mat\u00e9 cites studies that say people with ADHD are more likely to have allergies, lower pain tolerance, and higher emotional reactivity\u2014their responses to both positive and negative emotions are just more extreme. If you\u2019re more susceptible to environmental stress, you\u2019re more likely to suffer the negative effects of stress\u2014including the harmful impacts it can have on your developing brain.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>What are the best quotes from Scattered Minds? What can you take away about the development of ADHD from these quotes? Gabor Mat\u00e9 is an internationally renowned family doctor with expertise in childhood development and the impacts of trauma on health. He argues that understanding the social and psychological roots of ADHD can help you treat it in your child without medication. Take a look at Gabor Mat\u00e9&#8217;s Scattered Mind quotes with context.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":14,"featured_media":82731,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[40,13,9],"tags":[1105],"class_list":["post-108523","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-books","category-parenting","category-psychology","tag-scattered-minds","","tg-column-two"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v24.3 (Yoast SEO v24.3) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>The Best Gabor Mat\u00e9 Scattered Minds Quotes About ADHD - Shortform Books<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"The days of looking at ADHD as purely biological are over. 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